RSVP Blog

*smiling warmly and knowingly*

Posted by: ladylikestodance at February 23, 2012 10:06 AM

What would a girl do if she couldn't talk about her dating experiences with friends - get do & dont advice, pointers, constructive criticism from those who have gone before her and learned? Or just a shoulder to lean on...

Friends are definitely useful if they're honest with us and want the best for us

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at February 21, 2012 11:59 AM

Thanks Amber :-)

Saving up for a trip now

I've earned it plus I deserve it lol

We all do xox

Something I gotta teach my little Ching chong sumo...

What happens at nana's STAYS at nana's

... yeah I can say the same about my daughter too lol - she's a real princess lol

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at February 20, 2012 9:15 AM

Congratulations Unique :) How wonderful for you on the birth of your grand-daughter Indigo.

I am glad everything went so well. By now I guess things are starting to settle down a little.
Although I can recall my daughter being an angel between 0-3 weeks and than again after 12 weeks - but a bit less than angelic in between :)

Posted by: amberlightrose at February 16, 2012 10:24 PM

Nice to meet you all on Sunday. Beautiful sunny day, was lovely sitting outside in Parramatta.
Thanks for organising it.

Posted by: memoryofkisses at February 16, 2012 9:51 PM

Barbara

Thanks darling :-)

I swear I need a holiday after this 3 wk break lol... Or find a cave I can crawl into and sleep for a week. So tired

LadyMustang, thank you also xox

And Shazzam, did you need my help with something? LOL

I think a girly get together is in order. All the groove shakers out there, get in touch with "The Organiser"

LLTD

hehe

*waves out to Lady D*

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at February 14, 2012 7:13 PM

Ditto to everyone about Sunday, top day and plenty of laughs and discussion. I only met briefly with some of you, but no doubt if we hold these great days in the future, I will get to know you better. On the other hand, you may not want to!! lol.

all the best to everyone and all bloggers in cyber space too.

Posted by: serenity62 at February 14, 2012 5:29 PM

Good to meet everyone :-)

Paxse I'm still spinning out lol

Tip my hat to the socialite who likes to dance Lady-D for being the organizer.

Gina, you sexy thing! Love the red hehe and loved the connection. We shall meet again with LLTD soon and shake our groove things off at the marble bar.

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at February 13, 2012 12:41 PM

Hey all .........so glad you all such a great day....

wont even try to hide my dissapointment *throwing tantrum kicking legs in the air*......and im glad some of the newbies that were a bit wary of threading the boards went and had a fantastic time...i bet it was noisy lol lol lol ....special day...ahhhh memeories and friendships cant beat em

very green (dont mind admitting it)
Ms Musssey

Posted by: ladymustang66 at February 13, 2012 9:57 AM

Good to see you had a great time. Qld clan mcbloggers are still trying to organize a meet, Paris. I hear on the grape vine that a road trip could be organized by some "mexicans". Have just checked out flights, under $100 each way to Coolangatta that week end from Sydney. Much cheaper accomm down there than Brisbane. S xx

Posted by: shazzam5 at February 13, 2012 8:35 AM

Bigggg, how could I have missed you!!!
Come back to the blog writing. You always have interesting things to say.
Are you getting better?
Ciao, G.

Posted by: imgina at February 13, 2012 7:35 AM

What a lovely turn out we had to brunch in down town Parramatta.
Quite a gathering of bloggers and friends ventured out and were rewarded with glorious sunshine, caffeine fix and lots of boisterous lively chatter.
Cyber penpals, no longer just a digital foot print on screen, but up close and personal in wondrous 3D.

For moi, lots of familiar faces; Big, Tinkerbell, Memoryofkisses, ImGina, Serenity (such a comedian, we were all in stitches!), UniqueOne, Sparty & Helen,
and we welcomed: Blueeyedgirl, Kiitos, Paxse, Rodin and a few of ImGina's friends.

Thank you all for making it a heart warming and memorable experience, I'm looking forward to the..."NEXT" outing.

Posted by: ladylikestodance at February 13, 2012 1:40 AM

For those of you who attended Cobo Cubana today, it was nice to see you all and to meet new bloggers. Great to finally meet you Unique. Really love your hugs tingerbella. Won't be long before you find someone special Rodins.
Nice to meet you Ian, Blue Eyes, Louise and Ben. Will be a lot easier next time we have a meet.How are you Serenity?
How much longer did you stay Lady? Looking forward to our next meet.
ciao, G.

Posted by: imgina at February 12, 2012 9:16 PM

Aaaww! Indigo, how lovely and what a beautiful colour!

To Unique, welcome to your grandaughter and hoping your daughter is happy and well.

Mmwwaahh! to all of you with much love

cheers,
Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at February 9, 2012 2:50 AM

Me two, SJ. Waiting waiting.

On another note, is Big really going to stop blogging?? I read it on another post. Big, there are several of us who are in the same fan club. Do I have to hand in my key to the bunker?

Ex Melb, good to see you back. Also still waiting!! for the email.

congrats to unique and family. S xx

Posted by: shazzam5 at February 8, 2012 5:49 PM

Will certainly do Barb.

Our UniqueOne has incurred a rather large sleep debt.
Regardless, is a beamingly proud nanna to a precious little princess called, Indigo.
Mum & bub will be discharged today. Just gorgeous news :)))

Posted by: ladylikestodance at February 8, 2012 3:21 PM

Thank you m'Lady, that sounds like a wonderful plan. May we please have Plan B for dessert?

Btw, I'm assuming Unique will be too busy today to read so please pass on to her my congratulations.

cheers,
Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at February 8, 2012 2:27 PM

I see you guys are having all the fun down there in your part of the world, without me, again! One day I will come down there and meet you all. And peaceful, I'm still waiting for your email! A little birdie told me you were going to send one! Bigman, you sure are sounding full o beans these days, or maybe that's beer! Take care all, SJ

Posted by: singlejoy at February 7, 2012 8:03 PM

Barb, hun, just for you, I shall refrain, wouldn't want to stand in the way of good therapy!

Neither the tyranny of distance nor the nasty French bitch can compare with the dark side of the Balkan one (que wicked laughter)

I was a bit suss when they both rang me last night and were very, hmmm, "sweet".

As for how to deal with their temerity...tinkin, tinkin, when you come up to Sydney (soon, pretty please) and/or Brisbane, I need to give the little black dress I purchased in your fine fashionable city an airing. How about, we invite our two brave warriors to an outing; such as a recital, or an opera perhaps, no, no, no, wait, got it, .... the theatre, a romantic toe tapping musical, just perrrrrfekt *big smile*

And being the chivalrous gents that we know they are, how could they refuse such a cultured event?

I'm pretty sure that Peaceful will be dressed accordingly (knobbly knees well covered) and Big *gritting teeth* will sit still.

Conversely Plan B + graphic footage :))))

Posted by: ladylikestodance at February 7, 2012 4:19 PM

barb, that's the most amusing post I've read in quite a while! Neither peaceful nor I have anything to worry about with regards to being punished by the frot lady. She's so full of hot air and empty threats it's unbelievable. Her bark is far worse than her bite, besides, she's very well aware I won't drive her to Brisvegas or Melbourne for another RSVP meet so she has to behave herself.

big, tired after another exhausting day dealing with Centrelink bureaucrats!!

Posted by: thebigman9 at February 7, 2012 4:17 PM

Hi, TBM9.
No bunker needed - for reasons which those who understand will be aware of.

Keys are in a SAFE place.

You have a wonderful, vulnerable day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty

Posted by: peacefulsixty at February 6, 2012 11:59 PM

LLTD,

Please, please!!!!!!!! Promise me you won't punish either of them until I can get up there to witness it - I need the therapy!

I simply can't believe that those two are so casually testing you. Their temerity and, more to the point, their bravery are astonishing!

I think one is smugly considering distance and the other, hilariously believing his "condition" will protect him.

If you can't hold back, please use video.

cheers,
Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at February 6, 2012 6:31 PM

peaceful, in another post you mention you'll have the keys to the nuclear fallout shelter I'll be in hiding from those at whom I've taken the odd pot-shot. I suspect, after that comment re the age of lltd, you might want to get in said bunker well before me! After all, you are the oldest man on the planet aren't you?

lltd, what is so surreal? We're all friends here and, if someone close to you wants to send you their castoffs, shouldn't you be flattered?

big, looking for the keys!!

Posted by: thebigman9 at February 6, 2012 11:16 AM

HI, LLTD.
Yer not the only one attempting to do a bit of match-making on here either.

I hope this does not mean that anybody's freedom fo choice is going to be compromised. LOL.

BTW, there is an old, OLD saying that truth is stranger than fiction. That one IS old. Heck, I think it may even be older than you. LOL.

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at February 5, 2012 11:22 PM

Talk about surreal....could you ever imagine a scenario whereby a fellow RSVP femme is eagerly recommending gents with whom they think you'd get along with.

Bless you Darlink.

Posted by: ladylikestodance at February 5, 2012 7:07 PM

Hi, Oh Unique One.
Wood wunna those friends be a pretty accomplished 'booty-shaker' by some chance? An' wood ther tuther one be mostly inaccesible due to the 'tyranny of distance'?

If I'm right, just how are you planning on getting them to a situation where either one, never mind both, might require God's help?

Curious minds want to know.

You have a wonderfully HARD day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at February 3, 2012 11:37 PM

I have 2 friends here on the boards who have helped me :-)

Through laughter lol

God help us on the dance floor. No I take that back. God help THEM!!!

Hahaha if our open conversations are anything to go by, you know what to expect lol

Mwah xx

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at January 31, 2012 10:08 PM

P.S. What happened to you SoftandSweet??? We thought you were coming last night?
ciao, G.

Posted by: imgina at January 28, 2012 9:22 PM

Had such an enjoyable night last night dancing and getting to know you all at the Cammeray Gold Club last night guys.
What a sexy dancer you are Lady and it certainly didn't go unnoticed by all those men who asked you to dance. Only person who didn't dance was Big. He was very shy, lol. Even Serenity danced....with his bad knee......and then it didn't hurt. See Serenity, you need to dance more for you knee to get better.
Looking forward to our next dance.
ciao, G. XX

Posted by: imgina at January 28, 2012 9:13 PM

Yes I must agree with lady3152�s post 21st Jan.

It helps to lifts ones mood when there are good people on the blogs. There are so many blogs that have negative content and some delight in bringing others down. I have not been on the blogs for a while as I was busy with study however it is good to start by reading a positive post.

Posted by: timesrightnow1 at January 28, 2012 6:47 PM

Peaceful xox

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at January 26, 2012 5:35 PM

Posted by: lady3152 at January 21, 2012 3:48 PM

Thank you Lady3152 for the lovely compliment :)
Sorry I haven't replied earlier - went back to work full-time this week - so thanks to our lovely Australia Day holiday - which is pretty hot and uncomfortable where I live so I am staying inside and reading the blogs.

I think there are lots of really positive people in this world - it's just on dating sites there seem to be more than just a few frustrated and angry people.

Perhaps because people feel more 'anonymous' on-line - they feel they can vent and say things to other 'anonymous' people - that they might never say in their own social circle.
So they let it all out on-line - so they can go on being the 'nice' person they present to others in 'real life'?

I think when people first jump on to a dating site - they feel enthusiastic and positive. Then they realise that not everyone is who they say they are and that despite all the choice they THOUGHT they were going to have - people are often 'pickier' on-line than what they would be in real life.

Some people are lucky and meet someone fairly soon - others lose their confidence, feel bad and leave dating sites fairly quickly.
Others when they get disappointed,angry and frustrated - don't leave for a while and have a break like most of us do when we feel a bit jaded - and so woe betide the next poor person who crosses their path!

I think most of us just move on and accept this may not work for is - but it might one day.
In the mean-time you just live life as normally and happily as you can. Be positive and who knows you might meet someone in the real world or on-line- but your happiness won't depend on someone else.

I think that is where most of the bloggers here are :)

Posted by: amberlightrose at January 26, 2012 4:38 PM

Hi, ooouniqueooo.
So the 'divorce' lawyers don't even get a look-in? Good stuff. Enjoy it while the enjoying's there.

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at January 25, 2012 1:01 PM

Hi, Imgina.
I'd love to come down and take a stiff wire brush to my rusty-rustic rock-n-roll but there are two things conspiring to keep me away. Firstly, there is the age-old DowNunder issue on the 'tyranny of distance'.

How-wevver, the second issue is the more important - I have 'contracted' to take a very good friend to an appointment with a hypnotherapist for a regression on Saturday afternoon and I suspect that all that 'commuting' might be a little difficult to fit in, especially as I have to pick up said friend on the North side of Brisbane on Saturday morning.

Thank you though for the invitation. It is much appreciated.

I wish all those attending a wonderful evening of dancing, chatting (up) or whatever.

You all have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at January 25, 2012 12:57 PM

Whatever it is, just remember...

If you can dish it, make sure you can swallow

Hahaha

After a brief communication with the man in my life, things are back on track folks. Its been 4 months since we first communicated and I'm enjoying every moment that's enjoyable lol - observing with a clear mind that which requires observing while I'm in it.

Let me confirm the fact that I don't love a good fight lol but I hear the angry make-up sex is worth it.. so I might try it once - just for the experience you understand lol

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at January 25, 2012 6:00 AM

Hi everyone. If anyone is interested (and if the RSVP Moderators allow me to include this in the blog), there is dancing for single people this Friday at Cammeray Golf Club.
below is the information if interested. These dances are geared more for the 40+ and not for the 20 or 30 year olds. Sorry guys, you have a lot more places to chose from than us older ones.
And this mob running the dance does a much better job than RSVP for us older people, i.e. the music is more to our likeing and it's not so pearcing loud that you can't hear yourself talking. However, if you sit right next to the D.J. then it will be loud.
If anyone wants to come, let me know and I can hold seats for you.
Peacefulsixy, you want to come?
ciao. G.

This Friday, 27th January

Cammeray Golf Club

Park Avenue, Cremorne

Enter Park Avenue off Ernest Street
8pm - 1am

$20 at door

Excellent Selection of Finger Food served from 8pm

Stunning Balcony Overlooks Golf Course

and Surrounds Function Room!

Large Bar!

On Site Parking

Amazing Ambience!

Dress Code:

Dress To Impress!

No Casual Attire will be admitted!

Who knows who you might impress!

No Joggers, T-Shirts or Casual Attire!

Posted by: imgina at January 24, 2012 4:46 PM

Hi, TBM9.
Nope!
Those two ladies don't love a good fight. They love a good STIR. There is a subtle but discernible difference, in case you are not aware.

And yer missed with yer snipe too. Burntabit is OLD. I'm just about matured.

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at January 22, 2012 4:28 PM

No peaceful, not a sniper, didn't even have the pleasure of serving. However, can't help but stir up lltd and unique. You know both of them and they're both as cheeky and irreverent as each other. They love a fight!!

Now listen here lady3152, you're only a baby! What's this crap about 'making this old girl feel good about herself again'! Old, you're only 52! Peaceful is old (the sniper is back), you're not.

But you are right about the blogs. Even when on occasions things get out of hand, as they can do, we all still only want the best for each other. We are all seeking the same goals - to get of here - because we've found our 'someone'.

Look at singejoy. She's returned because her last r'ship didn't work out the way she had hoped. Whilst it is a bit disheartening to find many of the same names still commenting, it just means we all care for each other's fortunes. Stay the course lady, make more comments, stir up some controvesy, make new friends, experience an on-line tittyhug from lltd, seek and provide advice. These are a great forum and all the best to you.

big, still waiting for lunch!!

Posted by: thebigman9 at January 22, 2012 11:54 AM

re lady3152. Sorry if you found my 'nice profile good luck'...a bit off putting.I usually view blogger's profiles, to see who I'm talking to etc. Most of us on here do, and some of us are good friends outside these blogs. If you do receive kisses from bloggers, it will be to say 'all the best' and I think you have a nice profile. The reply, under Friendship, that is suitable for a reply is 'thanks, I wish you all the best in your search'. Hope that clears it up for you. I would hate to offend anyone. Take care, SJ

Posted by: singlejoy at January 22, 2012 11:01 AM

Just read the post by Amberlightrose dated 17/12/2011. I think you are a wonderful human being. To have had the experiences you have and to remain true to yourself takes a lot of courage and strength.I am glad that I have joined these blogs as it has given me an insight into how many wonderful people are still in this world. I was beginning to lose hope as so many folk I meet are rude or uncaring about others. You bloggers support each other and give good helpful advice, it has made this old girl feel good about things again. Thankyou.

Posted by: lady3152 at January 21, 2012 3:48 PM

Singlejoy - thanks for the complimentary kiss; these type of kisses are always much appreciated as a great boost to one's self esteem.

Posted by: exmelbourne at January 21, 2012 12:06 PM

Hello again fellow bloggers...I'm back after 4 months, with a new found friend, but not a relationship that's going anywhere anytime soon! I ended it last night, and I'm moving on to new posibilities, but must say have a good friendship, which we will keep going, because of the many connections we have, especially our love of music and playing it together. (We both play guitars-he plays accoustic, and I play classical guitar, which are perfect together).
I've tried to keep up with some of the blogs, but alas, been busy with work etc. etc.and sorting out my life. Hope everyone is still staying positive, and sorry to see a couple have left for their own reasons. I do hope that you are finding life rewarding. And bigman, glad to know you are on the mend, slowly but surely. Don't forget to stir up a topic or two while you are recovering. Thought this was the best place for a comment, as it's about friends. Take care, SJ

Posted by: singlejoy at January 20, 2012 6:52 PM

Mr. or M/S RSVP Moderator, I, as well as the rest of us single members of your site would like to know why you allow married people to join. They blatantly state that they are married and that they don't have any intention of leaving their marrital home but wish to have something extra.
It would be appreciated if a response is forthcoming so that more blogg members can comment.
Thankyou.
G.

[Please contact customer service this is not actually a blog topic. However this post has been passed to management - RSVP Moderator.]

Posted by: imgina at January 20, 2012 5:31 PM

Hi there everyone..I'm new to this and must say I need a little help from my friends:) haha!
I was sent a kiss from a private member..[Edited by RSVP Moderator.] and after reading his profile I decided to send a kiss back replying that I was interested...but I was a little nervous and sent back a not interested kiss dammit and now because he's private I have lost contact..and after repeated emails to RSVP I have gotten nowhere..so I'm hoping he will see this and get in contact with me!!

Posted by: alwayssmiling32 at January 20, 2012 5:07 PM

Hi, TBM9.
You weren't by some chance an army sniper in a past life, were you? You seem to do a bit of taking of pot shots and then running for cover. LOL.

You had better get well before you leave hospital where you can hide under the nurse's skirts 'cos LLTD and Unique won't show you much mercy and you may find some other ladies are after your blood too if you continue on your present course.

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsxity.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at January 17, 2012 6:05 PM

Big man

Come again?

Who wants to smother you in whipped cream & chocolate?

Hmmm interesting... Are you out yet?

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at January 17, 2012 5:28 PM

Posted by: thebigman9 at January 17.
I kept up with the blogs whilst I was "away" and you are loving all this attention, but it seems that many friendships have formed. So good one. Shame about Margie, I was hoping that she had lucked out!! Many thanks to Amber for putting me on to the right blog about your dealings, big.
S xx

Posted by: shazzam5 at January 17, 2012 3:06 PM

frangelico, you are anything but conventional! See you at the Longueville when you return. Which will be when by the way? Have you snared yourself a Mountie yet?

big, still looking for the shelter!!

Posted by: thebigman9 at January 17, 2012 12:23 PM

Hey shazzam, margie's computer has a virus courtesy of one of her kids downloading stuff!! She's not sure when she'll be back on-line.

Thanks for the kind words and yes, I am improving each day. A lot of the improvement is because people such as yourself have been offering kind words and helpful advice. Except lltd of course, who just wants to give me tittyhugs, and unique, who wants to smother me in her whipped cream and chocolate!!

big, looking for a nuclear fallout shelter that locks from the inside!!

Posted by: thebigman9 at January 17, 2012 12:19 PM

Re the networking folks, its a small world, A guy I'm about to date is linked in to several of my contacts on Linkedin. Social media is making it a smaller world indeed. Preference is obviously to network and meet new people in the real as opposed to cyber world and I trust that you all did just that on Saturday. Until we start to meet others by osmosis, Im going to remain as conventional as I can!

Posted by: frangelico1960 at January 15, 2012 2:59 PM

Hey Big, Just been catching up on the blogs and was surprised to hear you have not been well but at least sounds like you are on the mend. Can you let ex know that I will contact him soon. He can fill you in. Totally agree about the friends for advice thing. But usually do agree with you. Where has Margie gone?

Posted by: shazzam5 at January 15, 2012 2:38 PM

Can your friends really help you when you're dating? It all depends on who the friends are, who you classify as friends and whether or not their r'ship status is sound enough for you to go to them for advice.

I have gained some sensational friends, through my involvement with this site, but would I use them for advice? The answer is, yes in a heartbeat, because they're going through the same ups and downs as I am so their advice is pertinent.

By the same token would I ask my friends who are not on here and don't understand how this all works. The answer is no, in the same heatbeat, because I have to explain how the system works before they have an understanding of the process and, by the time that occurs, any advice they give is usually swallowed up in comments such as: "there's how many women to choose from?; how do you meet the women?; why do you need to go on-line for a date? etc.

There are advantages and disadvantages of asking friends for advice. The advantages are they could provide you with information you hadn't thought of before which may assist in overcoming the hurdle placed in front of you.

The disadvantages are probably a bit more in number. Unless they are very, close, long-time friends with whom you've shared experiences, the advice could be shallow and self-serving and no use whatsoever.

I think the advice of friends has its place but, in the end, the success of a r'ship comes down to the two people in it. If you're both willing to share the workload it has every chance of being successful and meeting the needs of both of you. If one party isn't prepared to put in the hard work, the r'ship will eventually flounder and that's not good for either of you.

big, about to go out with lltd, barbaraw, magnet and exmelbourne. Look out Merrylands!!

Posted by: thebigman9 at January 15, 2012 1:19 PM

Yes have a great time guys :)

Hey SJ,
Glad to hear things are cruising along :)

Posted by: amberlightrose at January 13, 2012 7:50 AM

Yes peaceful, I've been given a leave pass for the day however, I'm under very, very, strict doctor's orders to refrain from engaging in any tittyhugs!!!!

You take care, old mate, don't let those banana benders get you down.

big, laughing his arse off waiting for the slap around the ears that's heading my way from we all know who!!

Posted by: thebigman9 at January 13, 2012 7:14 AM

Hi, Folks.
I echo Singlejoy's hope that you all hava great night on Saturday night. Big, are they gonna 'lecher' outa prison for the event?

Spare a thought for me please. I'll be stuck in some dingy motel room somewhere down in Northern 'Mexico', maybe doing a little navel contemplating, along with a few other possibilities. Who knows, with a little luck, I might even experience some 'good vibrations'. Don't worry. I'll survive. I seem to have a life-long habit of doing that.

Y'all hava wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at January 12, 2012 5:41 PM

Thanks mum, and I'll use protection!!

big, squeezing the hell out of his Play Doh.

Posted by: thebigman9 at January 12, 2012 4:52 PM

Hello people, just want to say I hope you all have a great night on Saturday. Don't overdo it big, else you'll have too much attention from the ladies, and then you'd get a big head! One of these days, in Melbourne, I would like to join some of you and hopefully that will be in the not too distant future. Things are 'nice' for me at the moment, over 3 months hurdle now, so will just take life as it comes, enjoying every moment. Take care everyone, and as usual, stay positive in your life, not just on the dating scene.
SJ

Posted by: singlejoy at January 12, 2012 9:45 AM

Wished you lived closer Amber :) we could go out together and expand our social circles.

I'm recruiting male and female social buddies, problem is my girlfriends get partnered off and I get left out *pouting*.

Posted by: ladylikestodance at January 8, 2012 8:25 PM

Posted by: ladylikestodance at January 5, 2012 4:55 PM

That sounds like a good plan LLTD :)

I am looking forward to getting out there bit more too - now my youngest is getting older.
I think in anything in life, 'networking' is often the most successful strategy of all.
Plus as you say - you get to meet lots of new people.

I am looking at doing this work-wise as well - the more new people you meet, the more opportunities for socialising and you just never know who you might meet through new friends and colleagues.

And if not you've learned lots of new things and had fun anyway :)

Posted by: amberlightrose at January 6, 2012 11:35 AM

Friend of a friend, well you never know who you will meet, I was invited to a boxing day do by an fellow RSVP-er platonic mate; quite spectacular the launch of sydney to hobart yacht races.
Was introduced to all guests, as is the case, some people are drawn to you more than others. In this case, it was an interesting spiritual lady - who just connected with me, and i look forward to developing that friendship. There were two handsome gents who stood out; they being tall enough to capture my interest. Little did I know that they were indeed partnered off - to each other!

So what's a self respecting femmes in defeat to do?
I march myself off to the kitchen and righteously congratulate the partner, in his taste in men, of course! Once I broke the ice, we got on like a house on fire.
It was great fun, it widened my circle of acquaintances, and if I keep on "circulating socially", who knows, one day I just may be introduced to my Mr Right?

Posted by: ladylikestodance at January 5, 2012 4:55 PM

Hey lltd and barb, the 'bigman' charm works if nothing else does!!! Doesn't help get me more ice-cream or dessert and less bloody vegetables, or stop the vampire from taking my blood every day, but at least I can talk a good argument, hahahaha.

big out.

Posted by: thebigman9 at January 4, 2012 10:26 AM

Posted by: peacefulsixty at January 3, 2012 9:24 AM

I'm fairly sure my personality and passion would fall far short of handcuffs in the minds of your curious who shall remain nameless.

cheers,
Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at January 4, 2012 12:05 AM

Posted by: ladylikestodance at January 3, 2012 8:21 AM
Big, honey surely you had realised this was not moi posting? I trust you would of picked up the imposter immediately.
Indeed, the Unique one had made the same statement to you in person this morning, and that didn't phase you much either. Was so pleased to see you out of the white backless hospital gown, did you put on the civvies in honour of Unique's visit? Looking goooood, mon ami. That handshake is getting better, its probably the strength of a 10 year old's.
And it didn't go unnoticed just how attentive that dietician was, making sure she ordered just the right dessert to suit your taste buds!
She was very concerned about your energy intake and expenditure????hmmmm

Posted by: ladylikestodance at January 3, 2012 2:51 PM

Hi, BarbaraW.
Would it not be better anyway to 'tie him to the bed' with the power of your personality and your passion anyway?

Curious minds want to know.

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at January 3, 2012 9:24 AM

gosh

big man... you are getting a lot of attention aren't you...

how gorgeous... now hurry up and get better so i can karate chop you over the head hahahaha

Posted by: ladylikestodance at January 3, 2012 8:21 AM

Geez Big!!!

Fanning myself and thinking of walking again - what is it with you???

cheers,
Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at January 2, 2012 12:06 AM

Ohh :)
*hangs head in disappointment*

Posted by: amberlightrose at January 1, 2012 10:03 PM

You wish barb, you wish!!!

big, not tied to the bed.

Posted by: thebigman9 at January 1, 2012 4:48 PM

Posted by: barbaraw at December 31, 2011 11:24 PM

Probably ::)))

Posted by: amberlightrose at January 1, 2012 9:31 AM

Posted by: thebigman9 at December 31, 2011 7:52 PM
"big, still bedbound"

Handcuffed to the siderails are we sweetheart?

cheers,
Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at December 31, 2011 11:24 PM

Good thoughts unique but, as I've commented before, there are just too many profiles of lovely women in the age category I look at to make my boundaries flexible.

But the upside naturally is that men my age in Sydney have a multitude of choices and the fun is in the looking.

big, still bedbound.

Posted by: thebigman9 at December 31, 2011 7:52 PM

Your friends will tell you the truth about what works and what DOESN'T work lol

its usually what you CAN'T see - they will leave you to contemplate it and reach your own understanding at your own pace

We all have our own ideas and lists and methods and definites and negotiables and non-negotiables etc etc

My only suggestion here is to consider trying what you've never tried before - make your boundaries flexible

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 31, 2011 8:09 AM

Barbara

Yeah I got that lol
All good :-)

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 19, 2011 7:46 AM

Hi peaceful,

Well, if you can't beat 'em, join'em! Kidding. My shouting at unique was a weak attempt at humour.

cheers, Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at December 18, 2011 5:51 PM

Well you are right Peaceful - in recent times :)
Believe it or not 3 or 4 years ago there were people who could outdo me by at least a paragraph or two or three or four.....

Thanks Bizzy - but not amazing at all - I just had to learn some of that stuff because growing up in the kind of family environment I did - you either introspected and learned about people and life or you were crushed.
Well that's the way I see it anyway :)

I loved reading from a very early age and was luckily very good at it - so it was easy for me to learn to understand that life didn't have to be like my parents' lives were. I could be different.
It also made it easier for me to understand and forgive them as I got older.

Being the oldest child - I also probably saw much more than my younger siblings did (especially the violence) and I was blamed a lot more for my parent's unhappiness.

I actually see myself as being an extremely lucky person.
My younger brother and sister have had far more problems with life than I have had.
They struggled with learning to read as youngsters - changing schools frequently didn't help either - so 'learning about life' wasn't so easy for them.

Posted by: amberlightrose at December 18, 2011 8:40 AM

Posted by: sososophy at December 17, 2011 9:06 PM

That's a good one Sososophy :)
You are right - that is probably even more respectful.
I also like the 'try to do no harm' philosophy as well :)

Posted by: amberlightrose at December 18, 2011 8:20 AM

Hi, BarbaraW.

Please DON'T shout?

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at December 18, 2011 7:39 AM

Lots of self revelation there Amber. You are one amazing woman! It's wonderful that you have been self aware for so long. You became your own best friend. And now you take what you have learned and share it here on the blogs. That's another way we can help each other with dating; through sharing our own experiences. I do love hearing good stories. Knowing ourselves adds value to our lives. It's like banking: each little revelation is a deposit which gains interest with time and reflection. That is what I seek in a man. Now if you were a man Amber.....hmmm.

Posted by: bizzygurl at December 17, 2011 11:52 PM

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 17, 2011 7:35 PM

::)))

Posted by: amberlightrose at December 17, 2011 11:50 PM

Hi, Amberlightrose.
Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think that is the LONGEST post that I have ever seen on these blogs.

Thank you for sharing some of those insights into YOU. It appears to me that we are now walking fairly parallel paths in our lives without ever having met in person or consulted about it.

Also, congratulations on learning the lessons that you mentioned in your post. Great stuff.

Hi, ooouniqueooo.
Quote:
"you are making of horny "
Unquote.

Suffer, Boyfriend, SUFFER.

But what did I say or do to cause that? LOL.

And please, DON'T shout. LOL.

You both have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at December 17, 2011 10:18 PM

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 17, 2011 7:35 PM

OF COURSE you do! :-)

Posted by: barbaraw at December 17, 2011 9:52 PM

AC Grayling, the philosopher doesn't agree with the Golden Rule ... he argues how can you do unto others if you don't know their tastes! He instead writes something which I think is even more profound ..........

Don't do unto others, that, which you would not like them, to do unto you.
My favourite quote on my FB profile.

Posted by: sososophy at December 17, 2011 9:06 PM

Amber

I LOVE the way you capitalize the word CHOOSE ;-)

LOL

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 17, 2011 7:35 PM

Thanks Peaceful,
I have also learned that lesson. A long time ago
I don't care what other people think of me much at all.

But I do care what I think of me :)

Like you I believe in the 'do unto others' rule even though I am not religious or particularly spiritual at all.

IMO the trouble with our current society is that far too many people act from the 'it's all about me' rule.
That what I think/want is more important than what others want/feel.

People have a huge sense of 'entitlement' these days - which is why parents abandon their children without a second thought, there is so much road rage about, and real and violent anger as adults act like spoiled brats and throw tantrums (have you noticed how rude people are to shop assistants these days?) because they can't get their own way!

I fail to see how you can live by the 'do unto others' 'rule and LIVE totally selfishly.
Because the 'do unto others' rule is all about being aware of yourself and how you might feel and so being able to empathise with others - being able to imagine what it is like to 'walk a mile in my shoes' attitude.
So being aware of how your needs/wants might impact on their lives.

So therefore if I don't like being pushed around and told how to live my life - then why would someone else?

When I was a young person - I did tend to worry about what other people thought of me. But it was more about worrying about what those people I cared about thought of me - not everybody.

I had my 'epiphany' with 'outsiders' in Grade 5 at Monbulk Primary school after being mercilessly and constantly hounded while trying to hide the fact that my dad was an alcoholic (my mother would not allow us to 'tell' anyone).
One day I was at breaking point - it was shit always being the kid at school who had clothes way too large for me becuase we never had anything new.

I remember the day I finally admitted that my dad was a drunk and saying "Just because my dad is a drunk doesn't mean I will one day be a drunk too"
Suddenly no one had anything to hold over my head. I no longer had 'skeletons' to hide. The other kids immediately started to treat me differently.
From that day onwards I decided that I was going to be totally open with my life - if I had no 'skeletons' - nothing to hide - then there is nothing that people can 'hit me over the head' with.

However with those who 'loved' me it was different - I tried to live up to expectations - but realised by my 30s that in my parents case that was impossible.
They had no idea how to live successful lives of their own - so I could never please them because they weren't even happy with themselves.
Oddly with my ex-husband - it took me over another decade for the penny to drop!

Having nursed over the years has also enabled me to observe others and earn about life.
I have learned to TRY to be non-judgemental (I am not always successful!) we don't always understand why someone chooses to live their life the way they do - the only thing we can do if we love someone is to decide whether their life decisions make it okay for us to be part of their lives.
In my own mother's case she was so toxic to my soul that in my mid-late 30s I opted to no longer have her in my life.
I didn't hate her, resent her or blame her for anything - she was who she was - which was actually not a very nice person - but I did know that she would never be a safe person for me to try to love.
My mother died two years ago and I never reconciled with her.
It might seem harsh to some - but it was the right thing to do for me.

I don't live an entirely selfish life because I CHOOSE not to.
I am my own moral compass - I make my choices in life based on what is best for myself and (in the case of my children) those I love.
For example, I stayed in my small country town when my marriage broke up - not because I was afraid to move or worried what others thought but becuase I felt it was best for my youngest child.
I had learned from observing my own parents who constantly moved from place to place - that thinking you can run away from your problems is a myth.

I did worry about what other people thought when my ex was running around our small town telling everyone I was 'psycho' - apparently suffering a bout of severe depression - and then learning to finally stand up for my self - was the reason for his 'diagnosis' :)
But I got over it - surprisingly it took a long while (but then I wasn't feeling very resilient for a long time) with the help and support of others - and my own strength.

I don't always do what is right in some people's eyes - but I do what is right for me.
I CHOOSE to be a compassionate, empathetic person who tries to accept others for how they are - because that is how I CHOOSE to live my life.

However in living that kind of life I have learned there are dangers - you can be at risk of being taken for granted and walked all over by others.
And you can be a magnet (sorry Mags!) for needy men who weren't well-loved by their mothers :)
So I now trust my intuition a lot more and will happily walk if I feel I am at risk. So I am no longer a 'push-over' :)

I am not rolling in money - I am not pushing/wanting/needing to meet new men every few weeks - but I am happy being me.
I work in health in customer service and I try to make everyone's life a little better for having met me on that particular day.

I don't feel the need to tell people how to live their lives because most people manage just fine.
However I do get upset when I feel people are being treated unfairly or cruelly and I WILL say something - and I am more than happy to offer my advice if people ask for it.
But it doesn't offend me if they don't accept it :)
And sometimes I am guilty of giving unsolicited advice (sorry Foodie!) - so I am certainly no angel.
And I know that there have been times in my life where I could have been an a much better person - but I am working on that.

But I am happy and "I'm okay" for me - and that is the only thing that really matters :)

Posted by: amberlightrose at December 17, 2011 9:33 AM

Peaceful

you are making of horny

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 17, 2011 7:10 AM

Hi, Amberlightrose.
I've been around a bit longer than you but I learned what I consider to be one the most important lessons of my life when I was around 15 years younger than you are now.

The lesson? To NOT care what other people may think of me but just BE me.

What other people may say or thingk me is none of my business and actually says more about them than it does about me.

Society has sets of 'rools' for all sorts of things but EVERY one of those 'rool' sets has exactly ONE goal - - - to control us. If you dedicatedly and slavishly follow those 'rools' in whatever situation, you are submitting to those controls.and you qualify as 'normal'. How BORING is that?

How-wevver, if you choose to step 'outside the box', even to a small degree, you become 'different' and thus interesting to more people.

For mine, there really is only ONE 'rool' - Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. You can take every one of the 'Ten Commandments' and break them down to this one fundamental. F'rinstance, if you don't want to be killed, DON'T kill others.

If you would like your parents to honour you, honour them.

Etc. Etc.. Etc..

Letting go in the way ooouniqueooo mentioned below involves being FREE of any notions that you need to behave in ways that others might EXPECT of you. It involves having the courage and the authenticity to BE the person YOU want to be rather than how you envisage others might expect or want you to be.

The only TRUE freedom is TOTAL non-attachment to anything except God.

Do you have that sort of freedom? Do you WANT that sort of freedom?

People do tend to remember you when are that free.

Just my 0.02.

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at December 16, 2011 11:33 PM

Thanks Unique.
I'm not sure I could ever just 'let go' entirely - it just wouldn't be 'me' - but I do hear you xx ::)))

Posted by: amberlightrose at December 16, 2011 3:18 PM

Posted by: sweetmixture at December 15, 2011 8:55 PM

Thanks Sweetmix,
I will. I am feeling heaps better now.
Has taken me a bit longer than I thought to feel okay - but aside that anaesthetics and I don't get along well - I spent 2 weeks prior to surgery mulching and dragging straw bales all over the garden knowing I couldn't do it for weeks afterwards.
So it was actually my lower back that gave me much more pain post-op than the actual surgery!
But I am on the homeward stretch now :)

Thanks too Burntabit - I just hope I don't bore everyone to unconsciousness :)
And I imagine there would also be lots of women who give nice men grief on RSVP too :)

Posted by: amberlightrose at December 16, 2011 12:31 PM

Amber

So easy to think that way lol

That's why the focus always has to be on US and what we want. A selfish concept for some but freeing for the applicator. Too many of us have been conditioned to think of others first. Worry about others first. Be considerate of others first.

Put ourselves and what WE REALLY WANT last.

It can seem hopeless sometimes after experiencing there scenarios several times over lol so I suggest (to everyone) being brutal about letting go , HAVING fun, and being selfish might make a difference.

Try it if you haven't already

Thinkin of ya :-)

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 16, 2011 7:07 AM

I often read some of the blogs and quite enjoy most of the topics and comments but this one really takes the cake.....sounding board,,,support crew!!!..moral support...John, I think you should actually read the comments....

Posted by: satinskin at December 15, 2011 9:21 PM

Amber..I hope everything goes well for you over the next few weeks......Looks like we can look forward to seeing more of your comments while you are "confined".... I am sure you will have many looking out for you however please take care and look after yourself...

Sweetmix (63)

Posted by: sweetmixture at December 15, 2011 8:55 PM

Imgina,

Glad we can be of service to you lol

Always good to remember that it ain't really. a good thing to take things seriously in cyber

Enjoy yourself here gf :-)

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 15, 2011 7:24 AM

Miss dragon

I prefer friends like that but I dont have any lol. I have to do it to myself.

Too strong for my own good - literally

Its always ME being the the strong one, being blunt, cruel to be kind etc.

The thing is? Like you, my friends appreciate i

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 14, 2011 11:03 PM

Margie, LLTD and barbaraw...and unique.........you all make me giggle too.
G.

Posted by: imgina at December 14, 2011 10:37 PM

hahahaha, you're funny Big.
G.

Posted by: imgina at December 14, 2011 10:14 PM

Hey Bigman,
I wasn't pointing out errors, I was congratulating you on (what I thought was) a very clever pun!
Cheers,
Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at December 14, 2011 5:15 PM

My friends are really supportive and are capable of tough love when I need it :-) I had one friend say quite bluntly to me (when I was making up reasons why a man hadn't got back to me) "he's just not that into you". Not what I wanted to hear at the time, but what I needed to hear lol. My friends seem more interested in how I am feeling around someone than my intellectual perspective on that person, so that's always good.

Posted by: missdragon8 at December 14, 2011 4:28 PM

Dammit to hell amber! You've given away our dastardly little secret. How could you openly state we men are just looking to go to bed with every woman we meet? For goodness sake, it's not every woman! Just the breathing ones!!!!!!!!!!

On a more serious note, could everyone please accept my apologies for the ridiculous grammatical error I've been making with the use of the word insightful. I've been spelling it inciteful and each time I used it I had the nagging suspicion something was wrong. My suspicions were correct, I was using the wrong word, (correctly spelt however) so thanks to barbaraw for pointing the error out to me.

On with the search!!

Posted by: thebigman9 at December 14, 2011 2:03 PM

Amber,

Well said and all true.

The sort of experiences that you describe can also happen to men. At the end of last year and the beginning of this year, I had contact with a woman who gave me a comprehensive run-around, then pulled the plug. Recenty, I have had two carefully non-committal emails from her. I have no idea what she is up to!

I have also had some strange contacts from women and these contacts leave me wondering just what they are looking for.
Mercifully, most of the women on these pages are finite and clear; it is a pleasure to correspond with them.

So, Amber, we are here and a necessary component of our interection is to listen to each other, particularly when someone like you is enduring a period of enforced idleness.

Burntabit

Posted by: burntabit at December 14, 2011 10:24 AM

Hi, Tinkerbelle57.
Yer welkum ter yewz it. Didn't cost me anything to share it. Hope it works for you.

Hi, TBM9.
Thank you for your kind comment, Sir. And yer right. I need my boss' approval for the work that I do so that he will sign my paycheck each week. Other than that. I don't feel the need for approval from anybody very much - - - - - - - - - - except maybe occasionally from that weird bloke who sometimes perves on me from inside the mirror.

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at December 13, 2011 10:23 PM

Interesting topic. But unless you have a lot of single friends who are also actively looking for a partner, which I bet most of older people don't have - I wonder why our friends would be all that interested really?

I live in the country - so the majority of my friends are still married and/or partnered.
While they are mildly interested in some of my on-line 'dating' experiences (makes for a good laugh at social get-togethers and certainly makes most of them a little more appreciative at times of the decent partners they might have) they are not exactly a great source of support for me in doing this RSVP 'thing'.
Most of the time they just think I am crazy to even bother!

But yes - they do remind me of my positive qualities quite often when I am feeling down :)

My major source of support has always been from fellow RSVP bloggers - both more recent and those I remain in contact with from a few years ago.
I personally think only someone who has actually tried this option can seriously understand just how ego-deflating this can be at times :)

But I have learned never to take this too seriously. Otherwise I'd have totally given up years ago :)
I have never got past a first meet - if I have even got that far - which has only been a few times..
Simply because it seems there are a lot of very anxious people here who either see every person they meet as a potential 'serious' relationship - so every person they are in contact with has the crushing weight of expectation heaped upon their shoulders..
Which means there is no 'fun' or joy about meeting - it is all serious 'dating' stuff.
Yet so often they don't even know who/what they are looking for.anyway.

And then of course, there are those who are just looking for a quick and casual hook-up - which is certainly not what I am looking for.

As a busy working mother I am not going to waste precious time I could be spending with my almost-grown teenager - merely to meet someone who I don't feel the slightest bit of 'connection' to or feel any similarity in our humour, fun or attitude to life - simply because he is male and MIGHT be mildly interested in me.

Most times we work that out within the first half-dozen or so emails - either I don't feel he is what I am looking for e.g. he is rude, disinterested (guys, we CAN tell!), impatient, scarily desperate so that I get the feeling he wants any woman as long as she is breathing, is way too 'mysterious' so I feel he is lying to me, sends me seedy or racist emails or otherwise 'shoots himself in the foot'
Or he finds me boring or uninteresting, or realises by email number 2 that I am not indicating I will be desperate to climb into the back seat of his car on our first meet - so often he just suddenly disappears into cyberspace - never to be heard from again :)

And of the ones I have been keen to meet - as soon as the possibility of meeting was mentioned they either suddenly had a severe family crisis or reconciled with their "ex" - if the poor woman actually WAS an ex :)

Do men around my age REALLY think that women their age are either desperate to be laid or even more desperate for a permanent relationship - with the first still-breathing male who comes along?
Don't they think that we women have the right to be 'fussy' too?
I am flabbergasted sometimes :)

Anyway I will be having way too much time on my hands convalescing post-operatively over the next few weeks - so I am apologising to EVERYONE in advance :)

No work and NO gardening means - well - way too much time to think!.

Posted by: amberlightrose at December 13, 2011 8:21 PM

Peaceful, I loved the extra line that you added to orangepoppy's quick check. I think it is a wonderful reality leveler and one that I shall use... ' Could you wake up, with this person "every morning, for the rest of your life" and still feel ok ". I think it, pretty much says it all (for me), so thank you both for sharing.

Posted by: tinkerbelle57 at December 13, 2011 4:23 PM

Barbara

Because I feel like it?

LOL

Is that ok with you or is there anything else you'd like to ask me?

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 13, 2011 4:18 PM

Now there you go peaceful. Clear, thought provoking, inciteful questions. Not that you seek, want nor need my approval but that's what the blogs are all about so, well done! I'm very, confident you'll have a fair number of responses to those questions.

Posted by: thebigman9 at December 13, 2011 1:17 PM

So, unique, if you're yawning whist you're moving on, why are you bothering to comment on the subject .... twice?

Posted by: barbaraw at December 13, 2011 9:59 AM

Foodie
Do you really want to date a psychopath? It does not require a degree in psychology to detect one. It does require streetwise intelligence and asking the relevant questions to detect people with abnormal personalities. ie Peter Pan Syndrome and Wendy Dilemma personalities.

No one wants to date a psychopath, however, I'm intrigued, and would like to enquire, what type of questions do you ask? Do you take a Myers Briggs or Jung Personality questionnanire with you? Perhaps your an adept hand at NLP or NVC, indeed, how does one phrase questions in a casual conversationalist manner? And must the recipient be reclined on the couch for the most insightful responses?

Pray Tell?

Posted by: ladylikestodance at December 13, 2011 9:35 AM

Clunk, Clunk, Clunk...Take 3 ha, ha.

Posted by: foodieatheart at December 12, 2011 4:57 PM ...Hi Foodie, I agree with some of what you have written. We do concern ourselves with the essentials of living and with consideration to those of a similar age to myself I think that we are taking care of those things right now, ourselves. Not necessarily looking for someone else to do that for us well, not all of us anyway. Mostly people are looking to enrich their lives and seeking someone to share with; giving and receiving. Financial independence/stability/management isn't the only trait that is important or is what is being searched for in a mate.

There may be one friend in particular that you might ask that type of advice from rather than across the board and a friend's support is valuable. I do however, believe there is an expiry date for being in this environment (on-line dating) and that really depends on an individuals mindset.

I understand that perhaps this idea/ideal may sound a little wishy-washy to you considering previous comments but I believe that mostly, this is the case.

M xxx

Posted by: margie284 at December 13, 2011 8:55 AM

Hi, Folks.
There are a couple of other questions that I suspect SOME friends might be able to help some 'seekers' to answer.

1. Is the person whom I am considering emotionally available?

2. Am I REALLY emotionally available?

You may note that emphasised the word, 'SOME', above. Not all of everybody's friends would be open to commenting honestly about those questions. Also, I'd be rather surprised if many of us had no reservations about asking any and ALL of our various friends those questions.

Just my 0.02.

You all have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at December 12, 2011 11:55 PM

hmmm pet the sweaty things.

lol

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 12, 2011 7:04 PM

Hello Orangepoppy...Im a relative newbie on the blog too, but not on the site...Im not sure that I agree with your friend regarding the waking up bit...sometimes first impressions dont count...Some of my closest girlfriends of over 20 years didnt start with warm fuzzies, and the same applies to the boys....sure, there has to be chemistry, but I ahve found that a personality can grow on you and transgress into other feelings....I think you should just go with your gut feel as to whether you wnat to see this person again/enjoy their company...the rest may follow..I think we all place too much emphasis on this stuff and dont let things happen in their own time.

Posted by: frangelico1960 at December 12, 2011 5:18 PM

All dating advice should be examined objectively not emotionally.

See yourself the way others do � How many people reveal all their intimate experiences to their friends; therefore, a person will be judged on the personality they project to their friends. Similarly how do you know that your friends possess enough competent interpersonal skills to advise you in making the correct informed discussion?

A sounding board � There is nothing worse than repeating relationship issues to your friends. Eventually they will turn off to anything you say and advise you to see a psychologist.

A support crew � Wardrobe, attractive looks and physique may be the initial attraction. Eventually a person will start asking the hard questions and want to know if you are financially stable. There are plenty of attractive women bouncing from partner to partner because of the keeping up appearances attitude keeps them perpetually broke.

Moral support � Looking at photos and reading profiles in most cases reveals nothing about personality or attitudes to living. Do you really want to date a psychopath? It does not require a degree in psychology to detect one. It does require streetwise intelligence and asking the relevant questions to detect people with abnormal personalities. ie Peter Pan Syndrome and Wendy Dilemma personalities.

If people spend too much time on dating sites they will start believing that the singles lifestyle is reality living. The reality of life is that the majority of people are more concerned about the cost of living and maintaining a reasonable quality of day to day living. They will select a partner whose main personality attribute is stable financial management.

If people admit on dating sites that they have committed infidelity in a relationship, eventually that admission will haunt them. Most people will tolerate personality flaws; they definitely will not tolerate infidelity and will terminate a potential friendship or relationship at any hint of infidelity.

Posted by: foodieatheart at December 12, 2011 4:57 PM

LLTD

Next time we rendezvous, I will bring my hot pink crop and bend you over my knee

And you will beg for more

hahaha Mwah xxx

Peaceful will have no choice but to watch in the corner

hahaha

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 12, 2011 4:49 PM

Thanks for asking Barbara but I will NOT be stopping any time soon.

Moving right along now

*yawn*

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 12, 2011 4:45 PM

Hi Peaceful,

Yes please

cheers,

Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at December 12, 2011 4:15 PM

Peaceful & Unique, darlinks,

I will dance at your wedding & make much joy :))))

Posted by: ladylikestodance at December 12, 2011 3:45 PM

Hi, BarbaraW.
Would you like me to stop 'shouting' too??????????

Keep 'liking'.

Don't sweat the petty things.

V

V

V

V

V

V

Just pet the sweaty things.

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at December 12, 2011 3:18 PM

Posted by: orangepoppy at December 11, 2011 8:11 PM

Welcome Orangepoppy..what a lovely name ..smiles...I personally look forward to hearing more from you....

Sweetmix (63)

Posted by: sweetmixture at December 12, 2011 3:02 PM

Barbara

Don't sweat the small stuff

It ain't worth it

If it slides it slides

Doesn't worry me

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 12, 2011 1:17 PM

Posted by: sonotperfect at December 11, 2011 5:22 PM
I agree sonotperfect, "if the stamps weren't so over priced then more people would buy them" and use them !!.
I stay on here to get the stimulation from reading and relating to people's experiences and having it confirmed on a regular basis that one hasn't got "two heads". I give much thought to a lot of the topics, initiated here by RSVP's Relationship Expert John. that have been discussed in the past. So it's "YOU" guys that keep me on this site and so my $$$�s keep rolling into the RSVP bank account. Isn't that "double dipping""?? The forums are free to participate in, and this certainly is a big plus for the site. Where else could they find all these intelligent and supportive people to help and encourage their paying members - FOR FREEEEEE!! All those $0.02 worth are adding up....and that's my $0.02 worth.

Posted by: luci1956 at December 12, 2011 7:33 AM

Hi, Orangepoppy.
Welkum too ther B-logggs.

After looking at your rpofile I hafta ask, what's wrong with all the blokes down around Nowra these days? Are they all on drugs - - - er sumpin'?

That's a beautiful part of God's Great Garden down there.

Maybe that question that your friends gave you could be made a little more relevant and all-encompassin by adding the line below this in between 'morning' and 'and'.

"every morning for the rest of your life".

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at December 11, 2011 10:28 PM

UNIQUE - PLEASE STOP SHOUTING!

I know there's no means of accentuation or emphasis on here (just italics would probably do the job) and, yes, it's annoying but we're all in the same boat and if we all yelled every time we blogged, everyone would go deaf!

I believe that, in any form of communication, the more you shout the less people listen to what you are actually saying. That means some very interesting and valuable dialogue can go sliding off the screen.

cheers,
Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at December 11, 2011 10:21 PM

Hi guys, this is my first time here, but I have been following you all for a while.
You may have seen me popping onto your profiles to put faces to names.

I have been here for about 12 months and not having much luck, but my close friends are soooo supportive, and we check out profiles together when i need their imput.

One of the Gems that they have come up with is ' could you wake up with this person in the morning and still feel ok "

This feels like a good first impression.

I hope to be able to grow on here and be part of the group.

Love to you all

Orangepoppy

Posted by: orangepoppy at December 11, 2011 8:11 PM

If you value, and can embrace what you look like, you stand a better chance with someone else doing the same.,

... and while our frustrations about how OTHER people judge us or dismiss us based on what we look like exist, at the end of the day, they're attracted to what THEY'RE attracted to.

And we can carry on til the cows come home about it. But Unless we're control freaks and e have the means with which to change it, we CAN'T!

If you're happy about what you look like, leave it at that!!!

THAT'S WHAT COUNTS!!!

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 11, 2011 8:04 PM

Posted by: frangelico1960 at December 11, 2011 6:32 PM

So nicely put and absolutely spot on! :-)

Posted by: barbaraw at December 11, 2011 7:05 PM

I often request dating advice from friends, but here's the thing....unless they have met the other person and on several occasions, their advice is very subjective...its what YOU tell them and the slant you place on it at the time. More to the point is being able to vocalise, get everyones opinion and then formulate your own...as for body image...thats what it is..just image! We are way too judgemental...some of my much slimmer friends are the most unhealthy, in a general sense....Friends and partners are people you can count on, not on whose kilo's you count. Going to get some chocolate! Jackie

Posted by: frangelico1960 at December 11, 2011 6:32 PM

I've been reading the comments made and unfortunately people judge you on how you look. You could be the kindest most generous person who has the biggest heart with so much love to give but if you don't look good then forget it. I think it would be great if personality type was at the top of the list on RSVP rather than body type along with the photo being at the bottom of the profile as well - why don't you take the time to spend some time chatting to the person you never know what you will find out- and as we know what would really help with that is if the stamps weren't so over priced then more people would by them.

Posted by: sonotperfect at December 11, 2011 5:22 PM

Wow, a blog about friends and so much angst about people's size! The truth of the matter is, you can't tell a person's size (or health) from how they describe themselves on RSVP. A lot of women (and men) see themselves as overweight and will describe themselves as such when in fact they are not - and vice versa! I have a girlfriend who is a generous size 18-20 but sees herself as 'average'. I am a fairly fit size 16 and have no qualms stating I have some kgs to lose! Look at the person first, not their size. I don't care what size a guy is, as long as he presents himself well and can keep up with me if I drag him along on a 20km coastal walk! I think the guys looking for the fit/slim/average only are missing out, but that's their choice. I won't judge them for their preferences any more than I want to be judged for my own.

BTW I had a lovely first date yesterday - not sure if there will be a second, I will have to wait and see if he calls but it was very relaxed, friendly, the time just flew chatting away. A VERY fit guy and I'm sitting there thinking - how does he see me? I judge myself far more harshly than others do in that regard.

As for friends helping me with dating? I have a very close guy friend who is my sounding board, support network, shoulder to cry on and general "get your act together girlfriend" reminder. I couldn't date without him! I want to hear the (constructive) criticism, where I'm going wrong/right etc. Stephen54 - a GOOD friend will tell you what any good ENEMY will tell you. Love/hate intrinsically intertwined.

Anyway, thank you to all for your insights and comments - I love reading up on how you're all going and find your gentle wisdoms not only helpful but entertaining and at times delightful!

Posted by: eightofhearts16 at December 11, 2011 8:20 AM

Friends are friends for many reasons.

For help in dating - No

You need people who hate you for that sort of advise.

They will be the one to tell you that your "I have a great sense of humour"

Actually means your a sarcastic idiot.

Not you of course dear reader.

Regards - Stephen

Posted by: stephen54 at December 10, 2011 11:50 PM

It's really quite simple imgina. Those body shapes are the ones I find the most appealing. My ex-wife has quite an athletic figure which she maintained through our 30+yr marriage and 2 children. I trust you find that answer satisfactory.

Posted by: thebigman9 at December 10, 2011 11:44 PM

Hi, All, I am facinated to read those comments about body sizes. It does matter, otherwise, it would not draw so much attention from men and women. The reality is a woman and a man do seek physical attraction in the first instance. However that attraction is sustainable or not, depending on each individual, how we connect one to another. It is a lot deeper than first layer of the skin.

Posted by: lifestartshere at December 10, 2011 11:05 PM

Hi, LLTD.
Congratulations. You have put it in a nut shell. A rather larger-than-normal nut shell but a nut shell nonetheless.

I hope you survived the chat more or less intact or, if any bits dropped off, I hope they were some of the ones that you didn't want anyway.

Thank you.

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at December 10, 2011 10:52 PM

LLTD

You are suucccchhhh a Lady!

Posted by: barbaraw at December 10, 2011 9:58 PM

Ok Big, enough already! Reluctantly indeed! (What did you want - a hair shirt? - self-flagellation?) If you could lose the 'paranoid grump', you would see that I did not, in any way, comment on anything except your 'requirements' in a prospective partner as opposed to your self-description in your profile.

Yes, I do know what you look like (I wasn't aware of your training/exercise regime) but, by the same token, you also know what I look like! Seriously, am I likely to be criticising you? I'm absolutely sure that you are fitter & healthier than I. AND, btw, when I did meet you the last thing that came to mind was 'overweight' - in fact, what I did think was 'how nice - his smile matches his profile picture'!

The vast majority of people (in the Western world) are NOT healthy, regardless of size.

I've never needed help with the wheel nuts - 'flexes muscles' - but I know, from personal experience, that BIG hugs are the best. As for the rest, nfi but stop bragging! One day, given that you've posted this to ???? how many people, you're going to have to live up to it!

Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at December 10, 2011 9:50 PM

Confessions from an (ex)invisible femme...a friend in need is a friend indeed.

Ok lets be superficial for a moment and put aside the virtues of the "contents" and concentrate on the "wrapper", ONLY. Lemme be real shallow.

Now those cubs with six packs sure do look delicious, but how reasonable is it to expect that in a mature 50+ man? Or for that matter a flat, smooth, tum on a 50+ mum?

Lifestyles, genes, hormones, and a myriad of other variables dictate how you look, some you have control over, sadly others not. The ultimate challenge is to make the best of what you've been given. Stand naked in front of a mirror and ask yourself, are you the best version of yourself? Would you find yourself attractive? Am I prepared to invest the effort and energy to be the type of person that I seek in my partner? And honestly, I am still, a work in progress.

And here in is the issue. How many have the energy, resources and initiative to concentrate on the wrapper when there are so many other pressing matters to attend to, like life. BUT, we live in a society which values youthfulness, health, vitality and beauty, and our wrapper is on show for everyone to see, some will appreciate, some will not. Everyone will look then make a judgment. It is human nature.

Ever had that "wow" moment, well I'll share mine with you, I had just started going out with the girls (sexy, single, sydneysiders). My girlfriend was cutting through the crowd, I noticed guys jaws dropping, she is stunningly put together, a little younger, slimmer and dressed appropriately for a club. I felt like a frump. I was invisible. A pep talk later, some tips and tricks and a battle plan was drawn up to address the issue. I won't bore you with the details, but the important thing is I identified that something wasn't working and I was open to change and feedback. I suppose at this age, it is too easy to be set in our ways, but I rebel and seek alike minded souls.

Appropriate grooming & deportment need not be resource intensive, indeed it is not expensive to accentuate your assets and downplay your other less desirable bits. And we all have great assets, smile it increases your face value.

Posted by: ladylikestodance at December 10, 2011 8:29 PM

So why are you only looking for women who are 'slim, athletic and/or average'
Big? What's wrong with the bigger women (who are also quite fit and healthy.....just like you)? I'd really like to know. Please do not take this in any other way but a genuine interest in your answer.
G.

Posted by: imgina at December 10, 2011 5:12 PM

Oh! YOU DELIGHTFUL DARLINGS...You all make me giggle with your antics and I can do with all the laughter I can muster at the moment..ALWAYS.. I have not long tapped into this topic..Too tired to comment and contribute to it at the moment..plus I have put a huge one on in the early AM..on When to Stay/Run on REVENGE..hasn't been posted yet and I don't want to monopolize and hold centre stage...But I can really tell you love each other deeply..regardless the banter and friendly fire between you all ..THE BIG MAN I know is big enough to handle being the fav pick of the week and I just adore the way he handles it/you all..The bigger you are the more to love they say .. but it is the heart that counts.. the body is just the chariot that carries us around..and how boring it would be if we were all cloned to the 'ideal' weight..Happy and healthy is the way to go...My friends and colleagues gave me insights on my situation with 'my guy'.. that weren't showing themselves to me with the web of confusion he had woven around me..and clouding my vision..Even though I wasn't completely fooled on it.. their imput gave me valuable Ahh Ha moments..(didn't think of THAT..of course) and they also assured me I was not imagining things as he was trying to convince me I was ...I'm back to cleaning my long neglected house.. Til then..HAVE FUN WITH EACH OTHER.. Gotta love it BB12 xxx

Posted by: bluebutterfly12 at December 10, 2011 4:01 PM

Big: You're responsible for Harold Holt disappearing!!! My God!!! My cat had kittens when I was in primary school, was that you too? Ha, ha, ha!!

M xxx

Posted by: margie284 at December 10, 2011 11:35 AM

Reluctantly accepted barb. As you can see I get fairly annoyed at those particular comments (the ones from John, not you). Personally I blame Rosemary Stanton and her ilk for the witch hunt the media has against big people. You will never see, in an ad in any form of media, a 'big' person exercising. You will only see them eating a whopping great hamburger, with the super-size jumbo Coke in the other hand and a fag hanging out of their mouth!! I can count on one hand, actually one finger, the number of times I've read an article about we 'big' people being happy the way we are and that was in a Sunday magazine some 10yrs ago.

I think it's about time everyone woke up to the fact that the world is made up of people of all shapes and sizes. All that the vast majority of those people are healthy regardless of their size. And, before I get taken to task again, I am fully aware of the disgustingly high number of people in this world who don't have access to enough food, clean water, shelter and medical care, so am not including those unfortunates in the above statement.

Just remember this. The next time you slim people need some heavy furniture moved, or assistance removing the wheel nuts on your flat tire, we 'big' people because of our 'bigness' actually also have quite a deal of strength so we do come in handy occasionally! And we give the best hugs!!!!!!!! (I also give great head but that's another story, oops, should I advertise that, oh well, it's out there now)

Posted by: thebigman9 at December 10, 2011 10:45 AM

Hi TBM9.
I'm with you on this one. Although I take what the gentleman said as suggestions and leave them lie there as just that, it still has that 'faint odour' of 'scrawny-is-beautiful' and hard bodies are GOOD bodies about it.

I'm not a fitness nut and I do most of my 'competing' at work but I too am pretty comfortable in my own skin and I sure don't intend to let any so-called expert (An 'ex' is either a has-been or an unknown quantity and a spurt is a drip under pressure.) tell me how to live my life.

One possible difference that I might see betwwen your rsponse and mine is it doesn't piss me off. It simply amuses me.

Do it your way and let those who don't like it make their own arrangements, M8.

Just my 0.02.

I hear that LLTD had a death grip on the door handle most of the way down and back. Any truth to that rumour? LOL.

You have a wonderful day.
Best wishes.
Peacefulsixty.

Posted by: peacefulsixty at December 10, 2011 9:14 AM

I really agree with most of what you say bigman, and I do believe that if a person is happy and healthy in their skin, that's the only thing that matters. Love your sense of humour too!
Still friends, SJ

Posted by: singlejoy at December 10, 2011 7:30 AM

Hi Big, friend, mate & forever friend.

Having read it all again, I'm down on my knees, begging you please - IT'S NOT MY FAULT!

grovellingly yours,

Barb

Posted by: barbaraw at December 10, 2011 12:45 AM

One of the most frustrating things I am finding with making any comment at all is how it's interpreted! barbaraw, singlejoy and lltd, my objections are about the relationship expert, in this case, telling us what sort of lifestyle we should be living, not the lifestyle we already have!! All of you know me personally, all of you know I train and compete on a very regular basis, two of you know what I look like. It's just so bloody annoying that every self-confessed 'expert' makes these throw away comments about someone's weight without knowing what they do or how they live.

And it pisses me off even more that the 'experts' equate slimness with desirability and good, clean living. In other words, if you're slim you are healthy! What a lot of shit!! I know plenty of slim people who are the unhealthiest people on the planet. What usually happens is when we larger folk are mentioned in any document or paper or article, the assumption is also made that we smoke, eat only take away, drink heavily, don't exercise and are basically, as singlejoy put it, heart attacks waiting to happen (did I mention we are also to blame for climate change, Harold Holt's disappearance and the death of Phar Lap)!!!

I live a healthy lifestyle. I am fairly careful with what I eat, I drink only socially, don't smoke and exercise regularly. So what if I'm big. I'm comfortable in my skin, happy with my size and if that doesn't fit with someone's Ideal I don't care (I was going to quote Morgan again but showed admirable restraint)!

Posted by: thebigman9 at December 10, 2011 12:37 AM

Let's make it a 'pick on bigman' week! I've had my turn, NEXT!!!

Posted by: singlejoy at December 9, 2011 10:37 PM

LLTD Hope you didn't mind me checking your profile. I always do that so I can picture who I'm talking to in here. The 'kiss' great profile, all the best etc. is the only choice for telling you I like your profile. Hope you were not offended in any way.

Posted by: singlejoy at December 9, 2011 10:36 PM

The true friend will tell you the truth - nothing withstanding - because they value truthfulness

We May not wish to hear it but it will be EXACTLY what we need to hear

Posted by: ooouniqueooo at December 9, 2011 9:46 PM

SJ thanks for the kiss hun, but for me to delete your response from my inbox, I have to pick a rsvp generated fixed response which is in appropriate, so sorry in advance.

Posted by: ladylikestodance at December 9, 2011 9:25 PM

To SJ and LLTD
Thanks for the positive nods but I have a strong feeling he'll now blame me for starting a witch hunt. Not my fault Big, not my fault!

Posted by: barbaraw at December 9, 2011 7:29 PM

I'm really green here, but happy that you all had a great time in 3D. Did you have to wear special glasses...lol. What about something for us in the very hot and sunny state of Qld? I don't see so many around here. It was a very unusual 37C at my place yesterday, so I was nearly a melted blob! Not getting involved with your comments for bigman, barbara. (Don't tell him, but I agree with it all!) I think the health issues are soooo important. But Mr Big, it's in the interests of your health to look after yourself. Remember, a man with a waistline of more than 40" is just a heart attack waiting to happen! And for us girls, more than 37" also applies! I mean, what are friends for but to help whenever we can! Have a healthy day everyone! And for goodness sake, enjoy it!

Posted by: singlejoy at December 9, 2011 5:36 PM

Barbaraw, Touche!

Posted by: ladylikestodance at December 9, 2011 5:18 PM

msmagnet11 - I add my thanks to you for the get together, fun to meet all those bloggers, even the foreigners from up north. Apropos that....

bigman: how do you reconcile your objections to the mention of gym & healthy eating with your profile?

You describe yourself as large-ish yet you're looking for slim and athletic. Is it only the females who have to worry about body image? Besides, I think healthy eating and exercise are more to do with overall health than trying to achieve the perfect body.

Having said that, well done on raising the age requirement. Now you only need to lower the height, expand on the body and lengthen the distance and I'll kiss you myself!

Posted by: barbaraw at December 9, 2011 4:40 PM

Glad to hear that you guys had a great time. Well done... and should something happen in Sydney or perhaps NSW then count me in. Thanks and now on topic - my friends haven't got a clue about internet dating, so I say nothing. I find that far more "supportive" than playing twenty questions about someone I don't have the answers to and (quiet possibly) never will. To quote Unique "meets, are just that, and any dates (?) which follow are just that too". Even when the "dates" continue, I find it easier to adhere to the same "one off" mindset, as I may be deleted with just the click of a mouse - and silence, is so often the only indication. It's different, it can be fun but ultimately "it is as it is"... Enjoy all!

Posted by: tinkerbelle57 at December 9, 2011 4:35 PM

Margie,

Yes, I have encountered two women who were by no means straight in their contact. One appears to be a game player and RSVP appears to be her chosen piste. The other - well, it was so very complex that it is hard to assess what the underlying motive might have been. It think that I know what it was all about but this has a low degree of certainty.

Ms Magnet,

I thank you for making the get together happen. As LLTD said, it was great to be able to move up to 3D - well put, LLTD! If you have another such happy function in mind, I would be very pleased to be invited.

LLTD and TBM,

Thank you for coming south to join us; your presence contributed a lot.

Burntabit

Posted by: burntabit at December 9, 2011 3:24 PM

Thank you my dear Lady friend, I enjoyed it all immensely too. Hope you wow someone with that new dress and necklace. You should see it bloggers, it and she is stunning. Was a great opportunity to increase the friendship circle and I would do it again in a heartbeat. Have no plans for New Years Eve so if any body wants me to start our own "mature age function" or piggy back on something else just be in touch. Once again, my pleasure.
Magnet

Posted by: msmagnet11 at December 9, 2011 1:55 PM

Big: I for one would find that tattoo very useful ha, ha, ha....um....joking!

Mal: settle, your time will come.

Burntabit: It's nice to hear a man acknowledge this type of issue. By the same token there are a number of 'dodgy' women out there also; manipulative, controlling, bullying and abusive. Having been in 'situations' and as a friend, I can't ignore the plight of people especially those I am close to and have to be close by 'just in case'.

On topic...sometimes we are very helpful to our friends and sometimes it has a dismal outcome, speaking from experience at the receiving of help end where a friend told me it was time to accept a dinner invitation (my gut instinct was 'not interested really), ha, ha.

Sounding boards are terrific really it gives you another perspective but I like to go shopping by myself, I prefer to do the gym because if I have a friend with me we talk too much, healthy diet, got one but the support my friends provide.......priceless!!!

M xxx

Posted by: margie284 at December 9, 2011 1:38 PM

John, how apt and timely is this blog?
I have lots of friends, a wide social circle, but I find that they are somewhat "cool" on the idea of online dating. I did consult the girls on a number of issues you mentioned. They have been dating in the real world for much longer and are more experienced, a lot of things change in 20 years, and some stay the same.

However, I have to say after a year on here, the best people who know exactly what you are going through, the highs and lows of online dating are the friends who I have collected along this journey. Especially the bloggers, those wise, generous and understanding souls who selflessly share their experiences and support and encourage you onwards. This is therapy, friendship and life coaching intertwined.

Having just returned from a fantastic road trip with Bigman to visit our fellow Melbournian bloggers, I am full of impressions having met the 3D versions of my favourite bloggers. Ms Magnet, aka Earth Mother, I thank you for being the catalyst in setting this up, I thank you for your generosity and hospitality in opening up your home and heart to moi.

We are talking about arranging a bloggers meet in NSW early in the year, hope to see as many, as can see the value in it. I am richer for the experience. Smiling sweetly and widely.

Posted by: ladylikestodance at December 9, 2011 1:13 PM

New Topic

In view of the large numbers of posts about adverse experiences, principally women finding themselves being manipulated by some very bent men, this topic should provide an ideal confluence point for how to identify the bent ones early, how to avoid them or how to get out with your sanity intact if you have fallen into such a situation.

People with such unhappy, even frightening, experiences already have many friends on this forum. By all means consult your friends but increase your insurance by keeping abreast of the contributions on this site.

Burntabit

Posted by: burntabit at December 9, 2011 11:59 AM

love the pic with this blog,grey hair & a female not looking a bit anorexic, is she married, just joking. Real friends, we all need them & we should appreciate them. From tonight I will be baby sitting a dog for friends of over25yrs. anyone who has followed my 'career' on RS will know I am not a huge fan of pets (really only the neurotic ones) but it will be a pleasure to help friends out. One of my friends father has died at 99yrs & 6 mths so they are off to the Sth. Coast for a while. A friend in need is a friend indeed. Mal

Posted by: musicmal at December 9, 2011 11:51 AM

Of course, as is bloody usual these days, another expert telling us to go to the gym and have a healthy diet!! I know I've just singled out one small and minor component of the entire article, but why does everything always boil down to what you weigh and how you look? Every bit of advice we constantly receive through these topics tells us to 'be ourselves', 'act naturally', 'show your true self'. So, I'm 115kgs and 6'2", does this mean to get a date I have to lose 25kgs just so some woman looks at me twice? The next thing we'll hear is I have to walk around with my salary tattooed to my forehead!!! If I can't be accepted for what I am and what I look like, then I'm not interested. As unique is constantly saying, "I am me and I am real!"

I also notice, as mentioned in a blog earlier (I've forgotten by whom), RSVP has moved from younger, slender models to more realistic looking people. I wonder if it's the topic or they're paying attention to what's written?

Posted by: thebigman9 at December 9, 2011 11:51 AM