RSVP Blog

I don't think it should be too much of an issue what they wear, as long as it doesn't involve tight jeans or spandex, it shouldn't matter too much.but thats just me.
All how they treat you really, don't you think?.
after having kids with some one that had nice clothes, but never took me out, i was bored, didn't matter what he wore.
I believe it's essential to take a woman out now and then, make her feel special, the little romantic things are what counts., a cuddle, a kind remark, doing a job that needs to be done, hahaha.and i refuse to believe there are not gentlemen out there :)

Posted by: sunsettuscony32 at January 9, 2010 12:57 PM

Theres plenty of fashion and accessories out there for blokes, even the oldskool 'blokey blokes' And as for style, style isnt always about appearance, its alot more to do with how a guy approaches social, private or even intimate moments, moments not occassions, for what is life but one moment after the next, unchangeable once passed, but each one a lesson in itself. Now that my 30 second stint as a philosipher is over let me say, anyone who thinks there arent enough fashion options or accessories for men obvously hasnt enjoyed the bliss of impulsive spending on things they may only wear once or twice before the next time he cant help but spend (shopping isnt just for the ladies, and theres nothing immasculating about getting out and mixing with society). Anyway, accessories for men can include things such as the car you drive, the cheeky smile u cant help but give most women, or learning how to make your eyeshape change to express things consciously with them. Dolly Doctor signing out!

Posted by: mistalonely at August 26, 2009 7:04 PM

It's not how you look, it's how you see, for beauty's not an image it's a personality.

Posted by: juxtaposeur at July 12, 2009 8:41 PM

I agree wholeheartedly Bob, the style is in the attitude and isn't attitude so important on first meeting. Someone dressed up to the nines in the latest clothes may be just an arrogant bore who has chosen the time and the place to size you up. Someone who shows up in jeans and t shirt who has taken the time and interest to pick somewhere to meet with consideration for your feelings is a far more stylist person in my opinion. It all goes back to the little things in life I think, the small acts of kindness, the thoughtfulness etc, I believe they are the moments that last in your memory not whether someone had matching sox. Or that's how I feel anyway and I have met them both. I cannot stand pretentious people, they bore me rigid. The ones who think they are the life of the party just because they are there. Would far prefer someone down to earth and aware of what is going on around them and accepting and welcoming of everyones differences. I know a guy who choses a woman to be with totally on how she will look and therefore enhance his looks. He wants to walk down the street with her and get looks from other men validating his preference. He has done this for years and wouldn't know how to have a relationship with a woman or anyone else and is now really quite lonely although won't admit it.

Posted by: iaminperth at June 22, 2009 4:36 PM

Hi All,

What Woody says is OK...it does seem fair in this day and age of equality. Thing is tnhough, to me, its not about equality or fairness, its about showing that he has at least a bit of class, and the woman feeling as if she is a little bit special

Men's style (or lack of)...probaby a topical subject at that for this discussion...but not in dress, more in attitude.

Bob

Posted by: notafigjam at June 15, 2009 12:01 AM

I'm disappointed that some of the men in the 35+ age group in the ACT are either dressing up in the trackie gear and 80s toss outs, or shirtless or with their navy blue Bonds singlets on.

How does looking like a couch potato with an unattractive Homer Simpson polo shirt on expect to attract a woman who a man would expect takes care of herself? Men expect women to look attractive and well groomed and if you don't then I'm sure there are enough scrubbers out there to turn you on.

Seriously, clothes don't define a person, but it has a lot to do with refining them. I firmly believe I wasn't put on this earth to look like a slob with a 120kg beer gut, messed up hair and a pair of King Gee stubbies. Neither do I want a bloke that looks like that either. Oh and keep the photos of you with a stubby in your hand out of your collection too, it's not a good look when your half pissed in your photo...really.

Where's the fashion sense gone beyond the 30s age group? I swear us Aussies, men and women included (me too at times) have a lot to learn from our European fashionista cousins. Take a look at some men's health magazines or your sister's Woman's Day and have a perve at what the guys are wearing. If you've got Foxtel then switch on FTV and watch some of the male models strut their stuff, and if all else fails wear a loin cloth!!

Posted by: humbledwarrior at June 14, 2009 8:23 PM

Well said Perthie !!! I agree with a lot of what you wrote and it's the same for me. If anybody is invited over, they are treated like a King! So it's only natural that it works both ways

Nice to hear Fig...gentleman do exist, that I know :)

Woodwine, that's your prerogative, just remember not to date any European women...LOL. I mean seriously, do actually not offer to pay, or do just ask for half? Wow...I'm speechless

MrCheeky, not sure about the knuckles, but yes he did look a little ape like ...LOL

AND Willow!!! How would any guy think YOU were freeloading. They should/would be honoured to be lucky enough to even get the chance ;)

Posted by: starryeyez at June 14, 2009 7:24 PM

Thanks Starry! xx
I liked lunch dates for the very same reason that you like dinner dates. My time is limited and if its not going well, there was always the excuse that you have to go back to work!

Re paying for meals - I always offer to pay half. I'm working and I wouldn't expect anyone to foot the bill. Plus I'm fiercely independent and like Onestep, would be mortified if someone thought I was freeloading. I have a very strong sense of fairness.

Posted by: willow29 at June 11, 2009 4:15 PM

starryeyez 8/6@5.57pm......was he dragging his knuckles :-)))

Posted by: mrcheekyone at June 11, 2009 2:26 PM

If you are having a cup of coffee I really couldn't care who pays, I mean $5 at the most, what's the point of thinking about it and I think it would feel really silly digging out my half of the cost and passing it across the table or lining up separately to pay. I find that really pathetic and if you are going to disagree over such short change I think any kind of relationship is doomed. It just seems too trivial to me. If it's drinks, I always offer to pay for the second round but I don't think I have ever been asked to and most times the guys have been great doing the fetching, the place mat thing and the paying and having a laugh whilst they do it. I always cook a really nice dinner at home after a night out, usually three courses, but most times two as I rather like the eating at the table thing and having a lot of food to choose from. If they bring wine, that's great, if I provide it, that's great too so long as we have a really good relaxing evening without any fuss. I don't do the candles thing but I do spend a lot of time choosing and preparing the food, music, wine and making everything comfortable. I am certainly not going to spend time thinking about who is paying for a cup of coffee and frankly couldn't be really bothered with a person who did. I like a man to be a gentleman in public and I think most real blokes like it that way as well.

Posted by: iaminperth at June 11, 2009 12:09 PM

I think ..... first meeting share the cost. It's not a date after all.
First date, the man pays. If it continues to more dates, alternate who pays ..... that seems fair.

Posted by: woodnwine at June 11, 2009 11:14 AM

Re the who pays issue...i nearly always offer to pay half..i would say about half the time it gets accepted. Sometimes if its going well i say well let me pay next time.

If i have let them pay for coffee and havent offered i feel really guilty..i just dont want anyone thinking i am out for a freebie!!

Posted by: onestepcloser67 at June 11, 2009 10:11 AM

Hi Starryeyez,

I actually feel insulted to a degree, if a woman offers to pay...even a friend....to me its about old fashioned values and showing the woman that she means something to you...even if only as a friend; not big-noting myself.

I understand the equality thing these days, but that doesn't mean that a man cant still be gentlemanly and considerate...does it?

Posted by: notafigjam at June 10, 2009 11:29 PM

Hello again...sorry been busy with work etc...but wow, very interesting rwading

Ok to answer some of your questions.

Perthie, I am not much of a casual dresser. I keep casual wear for swimming at the beach, the gym, lazing around the house and gardening...LOL

If you all take a look at my profile picture...well that was actually an RSVP date!! Hahahah!!!

As you may well remember, I was one of the lucky ones, who actually met somebody worthwhile on here ;) That was probably date number 5 or 6, he flew me up to Townsville to visit with him, while he was working.

I prefer dinner dates, as I work 2 jobs, so my time is limited. If I commit to a date, it's dinner and then they can have my full attention. I have done one or two lunch dates, but I was always rushing, as I was in between clients, or jobs. I don't meet anybody, unless we have had some time to communicate via email/phone. So when I do agree to dinner, it's not casual at all. It's well planned and usually at a fairly decent restaurant. Even dinner at Toscani's, or Hogsbreath, desrves something better than a pair of shorts...LOL

FG...thanks and yes, people need to stick to their guns...and get it right the first time...as usually that's the only chance you get to make a lasting impression.

Woodwine, it was an Italian restaurant...but yes he must of thought, it was Maccas, even though he made the booking!!!

Virgo...I always let the man pay. Usually the date continues on.. and I then pay for Coffee & Liquers/Drinks etc. This point has been much debated on here..and my views are clearly known. I am a Greek girl...and it in my culture, a European man would be highly insulted, if a woman were to offer! In all my years of dating, I have never paid, or been asked to. But again each to their own

Willow, girlfriend, with a figure like yours, jeans and a red top would look fantastic...lucky guy xox

Posted by: starryeyez at June 10, 2009 10:48 PM

Hi All,

The thirty second rules sounds a bit like the 3 date rule....yeah, you might get that initial attraction straight away, but that can fall be the wayside once the conversation starts.

I was at a pub with my mates one night a few years back and told them I was going to chat up the next woman that walked...she was stunning. Anyway, plucked up the courage, said hello and, to cut a long story short, got her number...yo my great surprise!! Anyway, called her up for a date.... yep she was even more stunning than I first thought...within 15 minutes of sitting down to drinks, I couldn't stand her. Anyway, got through that and got out of there fast, but as I had picked her up, had to drive her home. Stops out the front, she asks me up for coffee....I bolted!!

Me, I am attracted to different things in a woman, but still have to be able to chat to them and actually enjoy being with them otherwise its a waste of time...it should feel effortless.

Bob

Posted by: notafigjam at June 10, 2009 6:30 PM

Yay Virgo, Sort the men from the boys !!! Only joking, but I just find then nobody has to eat or work out who is paying or get dressed up, just tidy and comfortable and then maybe you can grab a coffee afterwards if you feel like it. I think also there are other distractions along the way as well and you can see how the other person deals with them. If you have something in common with the person I think you will soon find out.
But it could turn out to be a very relaxing happy meeting and turns out fine. Last time I met someone we went up the coast to a lookout and climbed to the top. Magnificent views all around and he pointed out islands and reefs along the coast and then all of a sudden it bucketted down with rain. It wasn't particularly cold and extremely funny, like two wet dogs, or rather three. We went back to the cafe shook ourselves off and ordered large mugs of hot coffee. It was a laugh and apart from the fact he wants to spend two years floating around the coast on a boat, an extremely nice person.

Posted by: iaminperth at June 10, 2009 3:20 PM

Mens Style? Ok, let me imagine my first date.

Is that him? In suit and tie? But we are not working or in a function. It is a Saturday and will be in a coffee shop, or in a food court? No, you dont need to buy me a lunch or dinner, although I can eat as much as, lets say a Peppa Pig.

And this gentleman? T-shirt and jeans, and, clean and tidy. And he would not mind if I don’t wear make-up and I am just me, plain me, plain as no decorating accessories. Yes, it may be him. And now, he and I can sit together comfortably.

And he can talk! Clear, without the need to borrow swear words or rude words to assure his presence. And, he will have no metal nails --- oh, my poor head if he had any. :0) And he has no guns to stick but just now and then throw in some strawberry, oh I meant, celebrity gossiping.

Isnt he tall? So tall that I will look up and up --- admiration from me. I dont mean tall measured by his height, if you know what I mean. :0)

And then, if the mighty hand of fate would put him and me in the crossing of the same longitude and latitude, then he can, with the privilege, look after me, and I, with the same privilege, look after him, in shorts and in longs --- a perfect safe match. :0)

Posted by: ahappyending at June 10, 2009 3:19 PM

Yes, Perth, he was great company during dinner...I think I will take a leaf out of your book on my next outing...I love walking and talking, but will probably have to rug up down here to do it...because Winter is definitely here in Melbourne..!

Virgo...:)

Posted by: virgowoman2 at June 10, 2009 2:07 PM

Hey feelgood,

I agree with you about the 30 second rule...I once saw a young man across the road from me, and knew instantly that he was the One....that love lasted thirty-six years..!

Virgo...:)

Posted by: virgowoman2 at June 10, 2009 12:31 PM

Yes, what's that old joke about the difference between an ugly woman and a really attractive one - three beers! Lucky escape Virgo and what a cheeky man. Bet he was a ton of fun though and great company whilst there and it's good you recognised and like him for who he really is. Mind you works both ways as well because after a few drinks you can easily start sprucing some guy up in your mind but what a horrible thought if you woke up the next morning and saw them when your are stone cold sober !!!

Posted by: iaminperth at June 10, 2009 12:25 PM

To answer your question VW the male 90% of the time... Shows a sign of respect to your partner. Why 90% well if one feels totally uncomfortable with the other paying,,, fair enough.. but you could always just seggest to buy the next drink, or two.!!

Posted by: feelgood76 at June 10, 2009 12:18 PM

I'm never quite sure who pays either. I have offered to pay for my half a few times but have always been told firmly 'no'. I guess a lot depends on the age group and the financial situation at the time. Personally I would have a lot more respect for a person if they were just open and honest and did the beach walk or coffee thing rather than booking an expensive restaurant and then expecting you to buy your own food. I actually look for the company rather than the ambience as I have done the expensive restaurant thing over and over in my younger years and think at the moment it is a bit overdone. I have a bit of a thing about food being presented looking more like an art creation rather than food and always wonder how many hands it took to actually get it that way. Also the cooks seem to get awfully close to it to get it perfectly symmetrical at times. All very pretty but a bit offputting at times.

Posted by: iaminperth at June 10, 2009 12:12 PM

Hey willow,

But, at the end of the night, when it came time to pay the bill, I said I would pay my half.....he asked me if I was taking him home....when I said no...he replied, okay you can pay your half then...I laughed at his blatant honesty...don't you love em...!

Virgo...)

Posted by: virgowoman2 at June 10, 2009 12:11 PM

Hi virgo

I believe what your date said is true. (he'll know in thirty sec) I too feel the same way about meeting people. Nothing wrong with dinner dates..
PS: Gee's... lucky he told you before he had a that drink..!! another thirty seconds after, once the grog took effect you may just well have been the one...! :)

Posted by: feelgood76 at June 10, 2009 12:05 PM

I agree, Perth - love me, love my dogs - or at least accept them. Going for a walk at the end of the day is a great way to de-stress too.

Virgo - glad it broke the ice. He might have said "you're not the one" and walked out!

Posted by: willow29 at June 10, 2009 11:53 AM

Getting off the thread a bit..what do you guys think is the etiquette these days when it comes to paying the bill at the end of a meal...being independent and not wanting to feel obligated, I thought it was fair going dutch (paying for half)... let me know what the protocol is..!

Virgo...:)

Posted by: virgowoman2 at June 10, 2009 11:52 AM

Hi feelgood....I went out on dinner date with a guy who told me that he would know within the first thirty seconds whether I was the One....after meeting and sitting down for a drink and a chat he proceeded to tell me I wasn't it....that broke the ice, after that we had a great evening, enjoyed our meal, had a few laughs and I met a nice guy...!!

Virgo...:)

Posted by: virgowoman2 at June 10, 2009 10:54 AM

It's true FG, I think a lot of people don't read the profiles. Mine in particular states I like animals and I walk along the beach. That is not the sum total of my life but if you don't like animals and don't like walking then don't contact me, or get to like it. I walk for exercise for myself which I believe a necessity especially at my age, I enjoy my dog, I enjoy chatting to the myriad of different personalities at the beach, the fresh air, the whole ambience. It is a part of my life which I am not going to change and hopefully will not be doing that alone for the rest of my life. I have tried the 5.45 a.m. slithering out of bed and trying to get out of the house quietly stuff and it's not for me. It's my house, my dog and I'll make as much noise as I like thanks very much. Also it has to be very early as I work full time. Whether it's the beach or the park or wherever, it's the big walk in the morning and I can't believe how much hassle that has caused in the past. It's a laughable situation at times when a guy thinks you look pretty good and then thinks you don't have to work on it, I mean however do they think you get healthy.

Posted by: iaminperth at June 10, 2009 9:45 AM

Hi Perth, it was other people who told me that he wasn't going to turn up. If I didn't think he was at all, I wouldn't have gone there. It was all good in the end. I'm sure he's since forgiven my fashion faux pas.

Posted by: willow29 at June 10, 2009 9:40 AM

I wonder though if it's not so much what a person wears more than they couldn't be bothered to smarten up a little. I'm sure men don't like to be with a woman who looks scruffy and unkempt so why would they think a woman is happy with the same scenario. I can understand a guy saying 'well this is me and I am not going to put it on for anyone' and I do respect that, but dinner is a little different I think especially in a decent restaurant. A nicely ironed shirt and casual pants is good, even if they don't quite match, at least the person has made a little effort.
For me that is the key I guess, maybe a bit of validation they have thought about the meeting have wanted to look neat and tidy in presentation and prepared for a really interesting and enjoyable night out....hopefully that is. Personally, I don't go the dinner thing on first meeting, don't even like the lunch thing and prefer much more casual. My fav. is the walk along the beach with the dog, chatting and enjoying the scenery looking over to Rottnest, seeing the liners ready to port in Freo and then maybe a cup of coffee afterwards. Expensive dinners on a first date don't impress as I can flash the credit card too !! Mind you, if it progresses further, love a great meal at a great restaurant !!! lol.

Posted by: iaminperth at June 10, 2009 9:34 AM

Hi perthy i will agree,,, Dinner on a first date can create some uncomfortable tension. I oppted for a lunch meet so my partner could feel more relaxed as we get to know eachother.
Each to their own i guess.?
some people may not read profiles in full, therefore make poor judgment before heading out on a date.? That's internet dating for you..!

Posted by: feelgood76 at June 9, 2009 8:54 PM

Hi Starryeyez,

Why should you be attacked for having standards and sticking to them. I've said before, theres no right nor wrong when deciding what you want, its your choice, and you are entitled to it.

I agree with Perthy to some degree in that it would have been better if you both had an idea of the type of venue that you were attending. Then gain, if a guy cant be bothered going to a little extra effort to look a bit classy on the first date (and he has booked a restaurant for dinner), then it doesn't bode well for the thereafter.

Your profile is prettyexplicit in that it says "good grooming"...so bad luck for that bloke...good on you for sticking to your guns!!

Bob

Posted by: notafigjam at June 9, 2009 6:23 PM

Posted by: starryeyez at June 8, 2009 5:57 PM

Hard to imagine someone turning up for dinner in shorts. Where did you go .... Maccas?

Posted by: woodnwine at June 9, 2009 3:35 PM

How Willow did you make a first date thinking he wasn't going to show up. Did he say he wasn't going to show, did you say you may not show. Isn't a date a date ? Like you say a day and a time and place, and other person says yes or no.

Posted by: iaminperth at June 9, 2009 3:33 PM

I had a first date in a fairly casual public place and I was so sure that he wasn't going to show up, that I wore jeans and my favourite red cotton top. It was a psychological thing, you know? Like "well I don't care if he doesnt show.... I only wore casuals anyway because I plan to be on my own..". He did turn up and looked quite smart. Ooops!

Posted by: willow29 at June 9, 2009 1:57 PM

I don't know whether dinner on a first date is the way to go, unless it is a fairly casual one. I do know what you mean though by the long shorts in the evening thing. Even if it were a casual dinner, long shorts are really not appropriate unless you are in the tropics or somewhere and it is outdoors. I am also wondering whether the 'classic black dress and red wrap is the way to go as that seems very formal and you must have looked a bit of an odd couple. Whilst I truly dislike the coffee thing, maybe casual lunch is a better first meet. Long shorts and dark socks, sounds like my dad in the 50's I think, what a sight! I saw I guy I met on here for a very long time and he knew his way around town and he always used to tell me what he was wearing prior to us going out. I found that really good and helpful as then I knew something about the restaurant before we arrived. He loved dining out so we visited just about every restaurant and winery in Perth over the two years or so, great fun, we're still very good friends.

Posted by: iaminperth at June 9, 2009 10:48 AM

I think on the whole we women put in a greater effort when going on a first date...and fashion in general.

Even when we do pull out some of our older wardrobe, we (hopefully) wear these pieces in a contemporary way and blend them with some recent fashion...it can be a great look!!

I was a little let down on one RSVP date last year.

I was being taken out to dinner after many phonecalls/emails etc.

Regardless of all this, I feel I am quite clear in my profile photo's and info on there, that I like a man of style, or at least some style...lol

I put on a classic simple black dress, accompanied with a nice red wrap, matching accessories...I felt great!!!

I go to meet my date and here he was in a pair of long shorts, dark socks and a polo shirt....blehhhhh....

Needless to say that was the last time I saw him !!!

Yes some of you men may attack me...for not giving him a second chance...but there were many other factors....needless ot say, the way he dressed, was my first impression...and it was not a good one

Posted by: starryeyez at June 8, 2009 5:57 PM

Intelligent high IQ and common senses and well groomed guys to score my criteria. Amazing indeed when I was still active searching my match net (unknowing about their high standard lifestyles).., Often I've meet men that can sustained their social lifestyles, career wise professionals, secure highly above normal achievement, and socialite fashionable taste - a luxury cars, fancy dining, dressed well, well groomed and outspoken. Is not that I am highly selective woman but mostly, it matched my lifestyle beside I hardly know them at first. These things I noted since I was younger age until at this current time still works both mutual physically attraction between me and them. It's amazing to think about it, why did I picked a good match of mine or why did they picked on me... Perhaps that's the way they see and/or projected my lifestyle without telling them my taste's likes or maybe they highly analysed my movement whom i will be attracted to,...coincidences or that's the way it is...don't know the answers.
I'm not trying to boastful myself but someone met me face to face honestly tells the truth of my lifestyles ( she's a beauty, intelligent blogger).

Anyway, "The One" I am dating or going out with, we're both same taste, do likes shopping those fashionable dress code season to upgraded our wardrobes . i used to accompany him often ( well asking my opinion if he looks good at it) David Jones his fav store but quite expensive to compared the price but good qualities items to look at. So, money wise saver, I dragged him at DFO outlets. if he can find what he likes over there. same as me I find it more cheaper than the normal price of designer branch stores.
He loves good quality long sleeves polo shirts and good designer trousers, fashionable shoes and sports gears wears. Vise versa he gives me a good opinion when I'm picking my choices either which both likes the styles-designs to agree with it.
I think he is far more conscious in fashionable stylist presentable appearances than me. anyway, we're a good match to look at ( being im too tall and slim), his heights of 6"2 in 6 pack body build.. really nice match :)

Posted by: mohegansun at May 17, 2009 8:12 PM

Buddy, for sure, the country has a lot to brag about. And we do get dressed up to go to the city, hehehe.

Agree that the differences are what makes us all special.

Posted by: willow29 at May 11, 2009 4:35 PM

Can't agree more, Summer and Perth. I just gave to the Salvos a trailer load of stuff. A lot of the clothes were from 10 years ago when I lived in Darwin. Its hard to resist going through the bags and thinking "oh I used to love that..." and dragging it out again. Now its going to be simple and accessorise. (Except lingerie which has had me in a spending spree, lately).

Posted by: willow29 at May 11, 2009 2:27 PM

LOL Willow29 was that country or Country. Australia sure is a marvellous place, there is a place for everyone and everyone has their place that is sure to put a smile on their face.

Oh common, Willow, the country has more to brag about than its bargains. Some beautiful fillies in them there hills and who better to be stuck between two bales of hay on a hay ride with. Moreover, I hear what you are saying about jeans and things, now don't get me wrong, normally I prefer women in dresses, but the way some of those country gals fill out a pair of jeans, hmmmmm hmmmmm, sure does bring tears to a fellas eyes and what they can do with hats well that was my biggest surprise.

Shorts for one, longs for another, it is the differences between us which often makes the world a more beautiful place.

Posted by: buddy383 at May 11, 2009 12:31 PM

Hi Summer, I have some really good clothes from years gone by just sitting in the wardrobe hardly ever worn and I have virtually done the same and decided not to purchase any new this year. What I have done though is purchased some accessories to 'pull things together' and the results have been amazing. I always seemed to have drawers and wardrobes full of clothes but could never find anything to wear. A few accessories does the trick and voila a whole new wardrobe. I think a few really good items is the way to go rather than heaps of clutter.

Posted by: iaminperth at May 11, 2009 10:49 AM

"Clothes do not maketh the man" (who said that ?- Question of the day!) - Met someone elsewhere recently who turned up on rsvp. I didn't know he was on rsvp until I met him and he told he was 'getting off rsvp IMMEDIATELY' (Of course he was - but I won't go into that again I promise!) Anyhow.... Only saw him on a few occasions, however I LOVED what he wore - after the 'dates' I checked out his profile and he said humorously "2009 clothes" - he wasn't kidding! Then again my former partner wanted to leave as little 'carbon footprint' as possible and bought mainly seconds from charity stores .... Nevertheless, I ALWAYS liked the way he looked... I think females can gain an edge, however, by wearing clothes that are 'now' and flattering - not necessarily new - I like to pay attention to what is going on in fashion. After the breakup I did a lot of retail therapy so the following year I made a New Year's Resolution to NOT buy ANYTHING new to wear for twelve months - and I stuck to it - Wow that was so enlightening ...

Posted by: simplysummer at May 10, 2009 9:24 PM

I agree Violet. It's all in the grooming, whether the clothes match or whatever doesn't matter at all. I'm not looking for a robot I am looking for a real person with the laughter lines and the scars to prove it. I am looking for someone who has lived their life, not just sat around talking about what they want to do with their life. I like doers, not gunnas and the doers usually have the scars to prove it. To me a man who has worked hard to achieve is attractive and interesting. I am not interested in the excuse makers and the people who think of no one else but themselves and their looks. Narcissists are totally boring people in my opinion.

Posted by: iaminperth at May 10, 2009 9:07 PM

A friendly smile..thats all he needs..

Oh ok clothes too i guess..clean and tidy and that will be fine...sleeves optional ;)

Posted by: violetsareblue67 at May 10, 2009 7:58 PM

I rather like a nice polo shirt and jeans or casual pants on a man, nicely ironed and, of course very clean. I think grooming says far more about a person that the price of the clothes they wear. Personally, I would hate to meet someone so judgemental that they can't get over whether my sleeves are long or short or whatever. Shallow, very shallow people.

Posted by: iaminperth at May 10, 2009 5:10 PM

Buddy - thats one of the advantages of living in the country. Jeans and shirts are perfectly acceptable. And we brag about our bargains!

Posted by: willow29 at May 10, 2009 3:26 PM

So, in relation to RSVP pics, what do women want to see in a picture? Casual wear; formal wear; work wear; shirtless? What is appropriate for wearing to the first meeting/date? With that do you prefer a head shot; head and shoulder shot; waist to head shot; full shot? Personally I like all of the above in some form. A nice shot of a members face be it waist to head or shoulder and head (preferably with a smile!! I have seen some where it looks like they were sleep walking and decided to take a web cam pic to use as their main pic!). How a girl looks both in casual wear or formal wear with a full head to toe shot. I don't understand why people put up pics of themselves standing in front of a building and all you see is a distant photo of them?! I ask this as I am looking to update my pics and want a womans perspective considering britishracinggreen's comment. No, I no longer wear the see through $10 collared shirts that come with a tie. But for someone who is on a budget and just started working and needs a white long sleeved business shirt, buy one but wear a white singlet underneath. Buy an Essentials tie from Ed Harry's for $10, they're good ties with a great range! Shoes, invest in a good leather pair for between $100-$150 as they will last you for a few years and they need to be comfortable. Buy some shoe polish to maintain. The belt should match the colour of the shoes.

Guys are not totally limited but not having to have a whole wardrobe for every season is also a plus. Trends come and go, but a pair of blue jeans, dress shoes and a nice long sleeved collared shirt can be worn in a variety of situations and still be appropriate.

Posted by: completegent1 at May 10, 2009 2:33 PM

I think men are left a bit short for choice compared to woman. However, a lot of, how a person looks in clothes, is to do with self esteem. As mentioned here already, a hessian bag can look good(well almost) if the attitude is right and self opinion is high. You don't need to be metrosexual or machosexual, just show that you care about yourself image.If you want to score points dress well and if you don't need the second date then dress down. It's that easy.

Posted by: time4latte at May 10, 2009 7:04 AM

BRG...have to agree on the short sleeved shirt...worst look ever...has been a deal breaker for me on at least two occasions.

Posted by: istj54 at May 9, 2009 4:04 PM

I love a tall, slender man in an open-necked shirt with the sleeves rolled up. Pet hate - short-sleeved shirts, especially the ones that look like they came from a certain cheap men's wear chain. I met up for a drink with someone the other day and he turned up in an ugly short-sleeved shirt. As I sat opposite him, I thought how glad I was that I'd chosen an ordinary little cafe and that we weren't somewhere nice. I know, I'm terrible.

Posted by: britishracinggreen at May 9, 2009 3:03 PM

Hi Willow29,

I can agree with you, there are more women’s shops in comparison to men's shops. Does this suggest it is more fashionable to run a woman's shop? This is predominantly due to the fall out of environmental impact; women do place a lot of pressure on women to look well dressed and glamorous, and in turn the individual woman places the pressure on themselves to live up to this standard. It is predominantly the reason why adolescent/teenage girls rebel, they have been taught by their parents to know it is about the person not about the clothes, of course many adult women can't live by this standard themselves, so it is quickly beaten out of most young women by the time they reach full womanhood where it changes around to be more about the clothes rather than the person wearing them. I would love a dollar donated to charity for every time a woman has said to another woman, “Did you see what she was wearing?” or, after they have been talking to one lady and complimenting her on her new hair do, the moment she turns away or leaves they are into her. Women are often women’s worst enemies.

One of the best analogies I have heard was over the radio going to work one morning, two dingalings in a good way, host an early morning breakfast program in Newcastle, if nothing else you get a good laugh, but as the woman announcer put it, she buys all her things at Target, K-Mart, Best and Less, Big W et al, for the simple reason most of her friends couldn't tell the difference from the designer label and between them you can get anything you could get at any other shop. They were discussing the logies, and the male of the duo said, he is waiting for the day when one of the female actors (not actress mind you) gets interviewed and when they ask who designed her outfit they say, “On special at Target, fits great hey?”

Posted by: buddy383 at May 9, 2009 2:42 PM

It has also been shown that women generally pay a hugely disproportionate amount of $ for clothes than men. (Maybe should be in the 'Shop till you drop section.')

Posted by: diditforlove at May 9, 2009 11:29 AM

I think you mean mans suit planet, not many men could wear a suite. I think like everything, whatever anyone wears both male and female must suit the occasion. I think most guys look really good in an open necked shirt and a good jacket. That can be worn with casual pants or jeans. A good jacket and a good pair of shoes is a must and everything else seems to follow on.

Posted by: iaminperth at May 8, 2009 11:06 PM

I must admit that even at my age, I do love to see a well dressed man. Not sure that it has to be the latest fashion, but as long as the clothes "suit" (chuckles) the man so to speak! Nowadays a lot of guys, all ages, don't seem to want to take the effort to dress nicely anymore. Even good casual clothes can draw attention to the man wearing them.

I remember I wanted to buy this fantastic pink shirt for my husband. The colour would have looked good on him but for some reason he baulked at it. (rolls my eyes) I do so love colour!

I think George Clooney always looks good in the clothes he wears but maybe that is because I just love George Clooney!(mmmmmmm) lol

Ann

Posted by: sweetmixture at May 8, 2009 9:24 PM

Hey Girls,

Think of it this way...the less you spend on his fashion, the more you have to spend on yours!

Bob

Posted by: notafigjam at May 8, 2009 8:31 PM

I don't think guys need to stress too much about clothing and mix matching I perfer my guys in a nice pair of bondsy shorts n nothing else LOL doesn't take much shopping to meet that standard

Posted by: sammyle3 at May 8, 2009 5:53 PM

I agree in general. I also agree with Buddy; the person makes the clothes. Some can wear anything! I hope that the larger capital cities have more variety than the smaller centres. I've often bought or been given women's clothes, particularly jeans, because they have a lot more style rather than the featureless, straight up and down standard men's cuts. I also wear some women's "tops"; the ones that don't look too girly. They also look a lot better on. Maybe I don't suit men's standard clothes. Oh, btw, I'm not a cross dresser or fantasize about being in women;s clothes AT all. Is the Metro Man on his way out!? Ok?

Posted by: sequesterme at May 8, 2009 12:48 PM

Dunno Buddy, walk down a shopping mall and how many men's fashion shops do you see in comparison to women's?

Posted by: willow29 at May 8, 2009 12:25 PM

David Beckham could wear anything from Armani to a torn Tshirt (or nothing at all ;>0) and the women would go wild for him regardless....likewise, Raquel Welch was still stunning in cavewoman rags.
The worlds most Expensive mens suite is an Alexander Amosu.
You dont need alot of variety in fashion for either sex....however much female fashion exists 'cause many modern day women dont have wholesome lives or much self esteem and its easy to get their attention(and much of their money) through selling them something new each week...likewise, look at how much($billions) the make-up industry creams through appealing to womens vanity, 30 different applications of creams&lotions for the face,...LOL, how gullible are todays mainstream females???...my grandmas' used very simple and veryvery few skin products and had fantastic skin well into their 70s'....its genetics and good wholesome diet.
If a sensible woman finds a man of good calibre she wont judge or evaluate him by his clothes...of course there still remains many females who are happy to be fooled by an shallow man in an expensive suite with a bottle of champagne.
...as ye sow so shall ye reap.

Posted by: planourescape at May 8, 2009 9:54 AM

That men’s fashion is all very similar is purely perception. This either means a person is looking at similar types of people, or not looking too closely at the fashions, both for either positive or negative reasons.

Just as with dresses, suits are also different in their style and cut, colours vary as do the idiosyncrasies of those that dress, a tie for example can be tightly tied, loosely tied, not tied at all, at half mask. A shirt can be tucked in, left hanging out, done up to the collar or left open.

Casual dress is similar in men to females, and what fashion doesn’t provide a persons own dress style and sense fills in the rest.

Clothes don't make the person, a person makes the clothes.

Posted by: buddy383 at May 8, 2009 6:17 AM