RSVP Blog

Posted by: decoratress at February 19, 2009 10:37 AM

Thanks, decoratress....gave me a giggle to start my day.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 19, 2009 11:20 AM

Posted by: aquamanda56 at February 18, 2009 11:55 PM

I like what you posted, also your profile
Your reading is similar to my own.

I also like poetry, Spike's love lost below....

INVICTUS
by William Ernest Henley

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate;
I am the captain of my soul.

Although I don't believe in a god or higher power....Our SOULS are not owned by religions..I believe we Are the masters of our Fate and the captain of our own Souls.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 19, 2009 11:18 AM

OMG.... I must be hellishly careful.... Heaven forbid I should write in a devil-may-care fashion! Not being religious, it may spark a furore & I'll be crucified! If so, that's just a cross I'll have to bear. I won't write more, or no doubt there'll be hell to pay, Goddam it!

Posted by: decoratress at February 19, 2009 10:37 AM

Back to topic. I don't think you have to lose something to really appreciate it. You might appreciate the benefits that come with a good relationship after the loss of one but I can't see why you have to lose a love to truly appreciate another one. Feelings are so wide and varied and complex that each feeling of love is different. Whether it is love towards a partner, a child, a relative, a situation, a pet, love of life, food, the weather, etc., etc., You don't have to lose any of these things to experience the feeling of love. After all we say I love chocolate, after all that's a feeling of love. Totally different feeling to loving a partner or a mate, well I hope so anyway.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 19, 2009 10:37 AM

Again the my way or the highway dogma coming through. They may be at peace and free from pain after an excrutiatingly long illness. The release from the pain may have brought the person peace and therefore they are resting in peace, still alive in their loved ones hearts, held dearly in a special place by all the people who ever loved them, therefore they are 'resting in peace'.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 19, 2009 10:16 AM

language often has nothing to do with beliefs, so yes, Jen, you are being pedantic. Many expressions are colloquialisms.. manners of speech and they change in meaning constantly. They are used to express a feeling, frustration etc. the expression "oh god!" can convey different things depending who delivers the utterance. I definitely don't see it as taboo or hypocritical for an athiest to say such a thing. I would say that the term RIP can be used non religiously, just because one doesn't believe in an after life doesn't mean that one doesn't believe in dying (resting) in peace. for instance, when my ashes are in the dirt they will be at peace ( no souls involved). No negation of beliefs.

Posted by: aquamanda56 at February 18, 2009 11:55 PM

Agree entirely Lynath, RIP might be a term used when someone has passed after being in extreme pain for a time. I think for any group to claim they own certain phrases or saying is ridiculous. Any saying is only relevant to the person using it or the situation they are in. I don't think many people criticize so called christians or religious people for using certain phrases and they have no right to do likewise in my opinion.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 18, 2009 11:01 PM

Just wrote that I do respect others' beliefs Lynath. And also respect the Christian Church. Just because I don't follow their principles does not mean I don't respect them or their followers. Each to their own.

Re the R.I.P. What I am saying there to an Athiest is if there is nothing after death, how are they resting anywhere? So why would an Athiest even say those words?

There are lots of ways of offering comfort to the bereaved without negating your beliefs.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 10:50 PM

Gee thanks Glitter. And the same goes from me to you too. I have my Stables half set up now. Had my first guest stay there a couple of weeks ago. (rsvp friend too) and he said it was nice and comfy.

Power is only roughed in at this stage, but candles are nice. Yes? lol. Power might be a while away now after the news on my car this week. Aargh!! Oh well. Life happens! And compared to the traumas others have been through and are going through at the moment my little set-backs really amount to nothing.

Oh, and I can always bring something chocolate. After all, thats a life staple. lol

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 10:09 PM

Jenniferhi,
surely "The Gods" (not you Markus) were around prior to Christianity?
Roman Gods Norse Gods Greek Gods
and the odd Goddess too)
Wishing someone to rest in peace is not hypocrisy even if you are an Atheist.

Tolerance of others beliefs may include acknowledging them even if you don't subscribe to them yourself. So you could state that you hope a Christian instance Rests in Peace which would bring comfort to loved ones and acknowledge that is what the deceased person would like after death.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 18, 2009 10:08 PM

Something a bit lighter and funny (well I think so anyway!)

Headline for a male profile I saw yesterday:

"I'm only on this to get off."

The profile was really quite straight. I don't think he realised quite what he wrote. lol.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 9:12 PM

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 18, 2009 6:43 PM

Good point meandjane. I like that analogy.

I suppose I do have a bit of a 'thing' about this. And even though I am no Christian I still respect the Church itself and people who do believe. Extending from that I suppose I find it disrespectful to use words of the 'Church' in the wrong way. Often I suppose you could say in place of a profanity. (For God's sake, or For ..... sake.) Is it easier and perhaps more polite to say "Oh God!" instead of "Oh ......!"?

Haven't written about experiences with "fairies" or "the little people". But will say it's a big wide world and interesting universe if you want to go and really explore stuff. lol.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 9:06 PM

Me too plane, or shall I call you jane. I think that a lot of phrases are used nowadays just as a source of expression an really have no relevant meaning. They are easy, commonly used and something that is our immediate grab bag. I am not religious but have been known to use some of those phrases. It's just grab bag stuff and maybe it is easier for the non religious because it means nothing to them, just a saying now and then. I can't see anything wrong with it and I truly believe that there is not someone sitting up there judging someone for dropping a few phrases when there is so much more going on in the world at the moment that really needs a little help and guidance. Terminology pales into insignificance so far as I am concerned if we can do our little bit to help another in need. I tend to believe that actions shout a lot louder than words and after all a church is here on earth and the way they seem to be going at the moment have nothing in common with belief or religion at all, just capitalistic greed and control.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 18, 2009 9:01 PM

Hey Jen,

Hopefully, when I get my place up and running, I can offer the same hospitality to my friends, so if you're ever down this way, consider yourself invited : ) Of course, you know that goes for you too Willow : )) All you have to do is bring the vino, oh and maybe some of those yummy after dinner mints . . .

Posted by: glitteringblue at February 18, 2009 8:45 PM

Jen - It weally would be wonderful!

Posted by: willow29 at February 18, 2009 8:36 PM

An Australian priest blames the Vic bushfires on the state's lax abortion laws.

An American preacher (Heath Ledger fan Fred Phelps) blames them on rampant homosexuality in Australia.

Marcus blames at least one of them on the sexual frustration of a man - which must be a woman's fault, naturally.

Straw poll on which "reasoning process" of the three is more self-serving?

Posted by: missrule at February 18, 2009 8:12 PM

Jen - It weally would be wonderful!

Posted by: willow29 at February 18, 2009 7:40 PM

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 4:51 PM:

I think those things can be used as figures of speech without hypocrisy.

Just as it is not hypocritical to use a phrase like "off with the fairies" unless you believe in fairies, or to describe someone as elfish, or pixieish unless you believe in elfs and pixies.

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 18, 2009 6:43 PM

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 4:51 PM

oops, again someone has read my post not as it was intended.

My tongue was firmly planted in my cheek while I wrote my reply to you. I don't do lol's, so it appears that sometimes people don't understand where I am coming from.

I absolutely did not take any offence at what you said.

I absolutely understood what you were saying,

My reply was in fact a little self denigration.

Sorry you missed the point.

Now I will get serious.

Just because I am an atheist, does not mean I am hypercrical if I say god forbid, or god held us, or any other commonly used term that uses "god" to represent a kind of exasperation.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 18, 2009 5:52 PM

Wanton Women Wanting Wontons Would be Wonderful.

We might get approached by a randy Chinese chef. lol.

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 5:15 PM

Ahe....Why you hate me !
In response to your post at Valentines Day and here.
Is that the case of Classic Old Saying - The More you Hate is The More You Love ?!

Oops..

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 18, 2009 5:14 PM

Willow ~ I like wontons too!

Perhaps us wanton women should get out to dinner one night. Somewhere serving wontons would be wonderful! (hehe)

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 5:10 PM

I did write again Colleen, but was cut. Can hardly see why. Feel sure you can certainly take any comments made and would not take offence in any way.

All I was trying to say (when cut) was how does someone such as yourself (and there are others on the blogs who have done it also) who claim to be Athiests use terms like "R.I.P.", "Heaven forbid," "God forbid." "God help," etc, etc.

Wouldn't or shouldn't an athiest be more authentic by foregoing the "Christian" speak? Authenticity speaks volumes. To me the speaking or writing negates what or who you represent as a person. (ie the Athiest). Ok, maybe I am being pedantic, but then maybe it is something true Athiests should think about. Be true to your conviction totally.

I remember having this discussion on radio with Derryn Hinch once after he wrote "God Bless" at the end of a tribute after Maurice Gibb died. He agreed on air how hypocritical it was coming from an Athiest.

Just for the record, (I have written before about it) but I am not a Christian. Don't follow any Christian religion, but do believe in a higher power. And for want of a better word often call the power God.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 4:51 PM

On topic

FEELINGS

There must be a wound
No one can be this hurt
and not bleed

How could she injure me so?
No marks
No bruise

Worse!
People say, "My, you're looking well"
...God help me!
She's mummified me -
ALIVE!

Spike Milligan

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 18, 2009 4:17 PM

Glitter ~ That dinner with your friend sounded so wonderful. Could almost taste as you wrote it.
Her place sounds absolutely delightful too.
Yum.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 2:43 PM

Hi Jenniferhi and iaminperth.

No matter what the issue is, Love is the correct response. Have acted with courage and integrity. And that is all that is required in my situation. I have honored your message truly, so much to learn from it...thank you.

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 18, 2009 1:55 PM

Ahe, In respond to your post Feb 16 at 9:32PM.

Listen to this..

If someone tells you something that is painful to hear, take the position that they are doing it because they Care about you.
This will allow us to be compassionate towards them. then we can receive any judgement, whatever it is, cos they are saying without resentment.

Listening to Someone is usually More Important than Agreeing with Them. To enlighten someones mind Closure, have had ability to demonstrate one's self highest goods. As an old saying goes....No Guts----No Glory !

Sooo..I welcome your judgement...Say it what ever pleases you....
As I said I have thick skin - NOT easily affected in heated debate.... NO not blunt But thoughtful and sincere caring....
You know me I never take hatred in my heart...Believed me ( + ) Cross my heart, honest to say.....

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 18, 2009 1:22 PM

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 11:20 AM

And guess what jen, I also like Elvis's gospel music....How Great Thou Art can "almost" bring me to tears.

I am very strange with language too, certain words and phrases I like the sound or meaning of, . "god help us" is one....also, I like to spell truly with 2 ll's...silly I know...and my favourite word is "almost".There is inuendo attached to my liking of that word, and the inuendo police won't pass my explanation!!!

Back to the point....there is a huge difference between atheists who come to it via education and intelligence and those like me who come to it via a Catholic School (lack of Education) I think that is why I also think Richard Dawkins misses the point sometimes. Although I do love him.

And then of course you add to that my feminism.....which complicates the matter even further.

Sorry about your car, and I hope that is not "god" who you think will provide. Cause I can assure you he won't as he is too busy talking one on one to all the born agains.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 18, 2009 1:07 PM

Posted by: iaminperth at February 17, 2009 6:08 PM

I want to come and eat at your house, it all sounds absolutely delicious.

I can do a perfect roast.......chicken, beef, pork, turkey...and lamb.....

also the young adults in our family beg for me to do the roast potato's at christmas.

I am a traditional cook.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 18, 2009 12:11 PM

Colleen - There you go again - asking for a "Goddess" to help us this time.

Surely an athiest cannot believe in a Goddess? Wouldn't she be as un-plausible as a God?

Recently you have mentioned 'RIP,' Hell, and now a Goddess. Methinks there has to be some kind of belief system in you somewhere to draw on these type of words.
Or is it indoctrination from your younger days slipping back into play?

Oh re the car probs we have both had. You did well. Mine is $3,000 to fix. Not a very happy camper here at the moment. lol.

But then I still believe all will be provided. It always is.

Cheers Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 18, 2009 11:20 AM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 18, 2009 5:25 AM

Well there is another 7 arsonist in training...goddess help us.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 18, 2009 10:17 AM

54 ,February 16, 2009 5:08 PM
Have been a few newspaper articles on ethology popping up lately. Radio National had a program as well. Good to see they are reading the blogs. Darwins birthday has also been consciousness raising for this.
On monday a Latrobe Valley woman was convicted and sentenced to three years for setting fires on a total fire ban day. I read the story and saw her photo in The Hun. She was a serial arsonist with 7 children and allegedly pregnant with an eighth; though it was hard to tell. In her 30's too. I think she was from Moe, which is understood to stand for 'mocco's on everyone'. No polite baby bump for this woman, rather a pendulous fetus-containing prolapsed belly. She was caught in the act (lighting a fire-not giving birth) by a CFA volunteer; her kids were in the car watching. You would imagine a diagnosis of poor impulse control would have been made somewhere along the line.
She must have had a particularly bad infestation of worms judging by her looks but still had high fertility (as well as fire danger). She was living proof that no matter how horrible a woman looks and badly she behaves, she will be able to get copulations. I would warrant those kids would all have different fathers because no man once sober would have gone back a second time. The male arsonist also from the Latrobe Valley caught last week and accused of lighting the Churchill fires, apparently may have done it out of his anger, frustration and humiliation at not being able to get a copulation.

Egernia.
Thanks. Should do.

Cheers Marcus.

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 18, 2009 5:25 AM

Is it me or are has everyone lost interest.

Posted by: fifilafume at February 17, 2009 11:03 PM

Oh yum glitter, that's sounds absolutely delicious. I have a couple of moroccan recipes that I use for lamb at times but love doing the curry thing in the winter. I like the idea of putting all the dishes out and then you can sit with your guests and socialise. I started getting interested a while ago in producing some pretty authentic ones. I also like Thai food and like some of their claypot dishes, so friendly and easy to serve. I have lemongrass, limes, kaffa line leaves, basil and chilli all growing in the backyard so pretty organised. Also i have a small curry leaf tree, but I don't use it very often. I am also very fond of vegetarian curry and usually do a few dishes also. Great fun and a great way to have friends over.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 17, 2009 6:08 PM

Ecco - xx

Jen - I like the word wanton too - and won ton ..

GB- Sounds wonderful!

BOP - the more you smile, the more you'll feel like smiling!

Egernia - curry bushes are really easy to grow.

Posted by: willow29 at February 17, 2009 4:49 PM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 15, 2009 8:21 PM..

hahaha, C... luckily for future genealogists my family has a long history of only children, making it somewhat simpler than it could have been!
I addressed the legal implications at the time of name change, & tidied up accordingly.. thanks for addressing that concern, it's important info.

My daughter is the only child, of an only child, of an only child.. I'm sure that has witchy connotations, but sadly she has no superpowers (that I'm aware of..) (..yet..)

Posted by: decoratress at February 17, 2009 4:11 PM

ecce...my favourite queen song...and so true in life. Have a lovey day all and maybe the love bug will bite some...crazy or otherwise!!!!!

Posted by: junebaby57 at February 17, 2009 11:59 AM

Posted by: willow29 at February 16, 2009 11:00 AM

This thing called love I just cant handle it
This thing called love I must get round to it
I aint ready
Crazy little thing called love
This (this thing) called love
(called love)
It cries (like a baby)
In a cradle all night
It swings (woo woo)
It jives (woo woo)
It shakes all over like a jelly fish,
I kinda like it
Crazy little thing called love

There goes my baby
She knows how to rock n roll
She drives me crazy
She gives me hot and cold fever
Then she leaves me in a cool cool sweat

I gotta be cool relax, get hip
Get on my tracks
Take a back seat, hitch-hike
And take a long ride on my motor bike
Until Im ready
Crazy little thing called love

I gotta be cool relax, get hip
Get on my tracks
Take a back seat, hitch-hike
And take a long ride on my motor bike
Until Im ready (ready freddie)
Crazy little thing called love

This thing called love I just cant handle it
This thing called love I must get round to it
I aint ready
Crazy little thing called love

Posted by: eccehomoergo at February 17, 2009 12:47 AM

I do appreciate your respond Willo. Thank you for being there to enlighten me. To think of my impatience I'm my own worst enemy. Not so sure if I'm wanting games for fun or to challenge myself how good or bad I am ..it's like paying Chess for winnings, a check-mate then back-off. If things not to my liking I'm doing some craziness fun cos I know I got ace in hands to bet my winning then suddenly I'm doing ten times at once and that means pressured because I'm perfectionist, strong and stubborn with back to back personality( versatile). I think I was born under the influence of Zodiac Sign of " Bulls" and gemini..with thick skin, strong, hardheaded. After I completed my tasks then I started to execute my natures of boredom's...I know, I have best things in me to come-up with is, I'm hardworking, ambitious, considering lucky enough to lived independent and have resilience to bounce back from rejection. Trouble is I love it all, performing in such diversity it means, I am Jack of all trades but masters of none. I know I got brilliant outlooks, happy to experience new to me and not affraid of consequences. Sometimes I wanted to do what I wanted to do without guilt's but it turned out, not sort of my fate.

I think Love and Life is quite different phase of life. To fall in loved with someone need some changes to consider the other person feelings and not into fantasy dating misadventures. I hate people's in tears it's like ripping my heart of pettiness, the truth and justified some of terrible things I did in my past, could have been stereotypical to make it,.. the " fickle and tough" as there will be hard times and great times and everything in between. I just hang in there and ride the roller-coaster. As far I can see perhaps the real me. When I was in Melbourne/Adelaide, I'm having scotch -cola in hands sitting in the Res. table in Flinders St, watching people passerby, analyzing their faces and I could tell there is some joy in their heart,...why me.. same as usual from other places I been, either overseas or local, stood there lifeless., once I've experience and see things, it took me as ordinary usual things I always do. Yes I do appreciate the beauty of each natures and places but the excitement is just a short-lived same as my daily routine sometimes... I believed everyone's aim in life should be to be happy and that anythings come along is a bonus and bliss. I'm definitely positive I think some other people have has experiences and knows what I'm talking about, not just for us alone Willo. Because I don't want to pretend I'm OK that I am Not, and don't want to cheat my feelings pretending very happy at all times...I just wanted to be honest of who I am.

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 16, 2009 11:22 PM

No, apparently I am the one who is stupid, giving advice to others that I do not understand.

Simplicity, unfortunately, is me
Complexity, I am too dumb to read
A contented mind is a continual feast
A calligraphy banner
I am to treat myself as a gift

Posted by: ahappyending at February 16, 2009 9:32 PM

"As a mean, an average, men stayed and defended their properties and women and children fled fires where they could. This is of course the strong territorial instinct we posess; one that in the normal course in our safe, ordered and regulated society rarely surfaces as a desperate fight."
...marcus, those women set those fires on purpose so that they could take off...and leave the men behind...ha...ha....greener pastures...or is the grass really greener?
I read in the paper yesterday that women over thirty did tend to stray because the men they were with(did they marry way back in the caves?)were not seen as good genetic prospects...something to do with having worms and not smelling right:))

Posted by: istj54 at February 16, 2009 5:08 PM

Hi all,

I thought I would pop in on the blogs as it's been a while since I've read any comments and contributed. The set up has changed again and I got lost trying to get to here!

The current topic of name changing is interesting and something I have been pondering for a few months. I'm re marrying in 4 months and have decided to hyphenate my surname to include my new married name. My sole reasons for this is that my son doesnt feel alienated by a complete change and also because I just love my fiance's surname. It's French descent and just rolls of the tongue.

iaminperth
The secret to a good curry is to use fresh curry leaves. Available at Asian/Indian grocery stores and quite suitable to keep in the freezer.

Marcus

"4.155" bore + 3.35" stroke + 6000cc + V8 + 13:1 Comp + 102 Octane avgas revved to 7500 = about 650 HP"
Does this mathematical equation = Numero Uno? I hope it does and good luck to you.

Posted by: egernia at February 16, 2009 4:33 PM

"Wanton" - mmmm. I like that word! lol.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 16, 2009 4:29 PM

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 15, 2009 11:10 PM

Willow is right.

We all have struggles. We all have dreams. And often when we think we have all that we need there is still that niggly something creating an uneasiness.

To me it's all part of the journey. We can't have it all - all of the time. Would be nice I suppose. But does it ever really happen for anyone? I think not. And if it did, would life be a bit mundane and boring? I think so.

It's good to have a restless spirit. Keeps us aware that there is something more. Something to strive for. To search for.

You said - "Once I achieved things the excitement is diminished...." That's normal.
And that's why we need to have many goals and dreams. And to keep working towards them. It's that "Bucket list" isn't it?
Ticking them off brings such a high at achieving, but then there can be that emotional drop after the high drops back down to ground. Very normal. So out with the list again and away with the next goal to tick off.

And when you feel down, just remember what YOU have achieved, pat yourself on the back and up and at 'em again.

"If nothing changes - nothing changes."

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 16, 2009 4:01 PM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 16, 2009 4:31 AM

Maybe there is something in this hocuspocusology conflagrate.

What are the odds; two of the most famous men in history were born on exactly the same day 12th February 1809.

Charles Darwin and Arbaham Lincoln.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 16, 2009 2:43 PM

Marcus, l am sure that the women who stayed to help their husbands fight the fires and died with them will agree.....
Never doubt that women are strong, Marcus, despite what your alpha mind tells you............K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 16, 2009 2:27 PM

mmm names, when I got divorced I changed the name I was known as, at work and socially...back to my family name. My business card, the work directory all have that name.

At anyting to do with my boys, the ATO and other official stuff, like banks and wills, pay slips etc, my securirty passes, I am still under my married name. My passport will be under that name.

My lawyer told me that a woman can be known as her maiden/family name, without having to resort to major officail changes, because she has a birth certificate saying who she is.

So that is what I did. Everyone I know , socially and in business calls me by my family name. But they know my married name as well, using both has never been a problem since 1992 when I first did it.

And my signature...is a squiggle so that I don't sign the wrong name!!!!! just my experience on it all...jewels

Posted by: junebaby57 at February 16, 2009 1:33 PM

Bop, You are probably boring yourself trying to work out why you are bored. Get out and do stuff, investigate stuff, get involved in stuff, any stuff, so long as it is enjoyable. Become a single minded person. Of course, you are bored because you have become boring thinking about it and writing about it. Get really busy, get involved in something you are passionate about and do whatever it is very well.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 16, 2009 12:27 PM

Perth @ February 15, 2009 8:48 PM

Perth, that sounds just like heaven. I too love curries and hot spicy foods - favourites being a great Tom Yum, Vindaloo and even, mmmmm, chilli, garlic and lemon grass encrusted, deep fried squid or tofu (mouth is watering now) mmm. Haven't found an Asian supermarket here yet, but still exploring and haven't made it past the op shops (of which there are heaps!). But the fresh produce here is amazing and delicious.

That scene you described in the courtyard was what I did with a friend just last week. Those special moments stamp on your memory. She has this gorgeous, old, little seaside cottage with a small inner courtyard, protected from the strong sea winds. The walls are white washed solid blocks and all about are pots of bright pink and read geraniums, and herbs.

We all had our comfy clothes on and the obligatory scarf. The wood fired pot belly stove going beside our table in the corner. Over by the tiny old creamery room, she has tucked away in a small, cute, covered bar, a great bbq/roaster, within which was a locally butchered and super fresh piece of lamb roasting, coated in yogurt, mustard and sesame seeds and impregnated with garlic and rosemary. The smell of that with the wood smoke mmmmm. . ..

On the pot belly stove the baby potatoes were just coming to the boil. She added fresh real butter and chives as soon as drained, from the stove to the plate in under 20 seconds. A quick toss of the rocket salad with roasted pine nuts and the fragrant Cab Sav was poured out.

All this was put together whilst chatting and laughing and trundling inside and out with condiments for the table, and adding wood to the stove (my job). After dinner a home made apricot crumble (made with organic apricots from the neighbours garden) was served with thick dollop cream infused with vanilla. Fresh coffee brewed on the wood stove was served along with little, engraved, antique glasses full of Baileys Irish Cream or port.

What a delightful and soul reviving night for all present. These are the moments that make life worth living : )))))

The best thing was that our original plans were to go to the local pub for dinner, I found out upon arrival that our plans had changed, she saying it was easier to have a bbq. Unexpectedness made the food all the more delicious.

Gotta day off today, so it's off to the ice skating rink now to work off all that glorious food, to some funky disco music . . . ; )

Avagoodone.
Glitter xo

Posted by: glitteringblue at February 16, 2009 12:10 PM

BOP - love and life are definately confusing at times. Only worry about the things you can change. Theres no point worrying about the other stuff. I think the frustration is that its a waiting game. Some things just dont happen fast enough. Again, there's no point in stressing over it.If its going to happen, it will and no amount of champing the bit will help.
For myself, Im trying to maintain patience but, like you, in turmoil.

So in short, the answer is "yes" :)
Hang in there.

Posted by: willow29 at February 16, 2009 11:00 AM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 15, 2009 8:23 PM

Thanks for that...a little too much wine and rambling on last night.

Anyway I'm off out to breakfast this morning with the owner of the funniest male profile on rsvp. We have been friends for about 12 months now. I will have eggs florentine his will have eggs benedict....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 16, 2009 10:16 AM

I've no intention of changing my name, first last or middle. My first name has grown on me over the years. In my young days the only other Marcus I knew was a retired greyhound but now it is fairly widespread. I like it as historically relevant as the name of the wisest and most benevolent of the roman emperors; and without any religious connection. My middle name connects me to my nordic, and French maternal ancestors and my patronymic, my surname, fits nicely with my heritage and occupation.
Jen I see you are surviving and are back to chirping wantonly and reminding me to stomp around here making sure no embers of any hocuspocusology conflagrate.
It was interesting to see the Catholic Church, acknowledge Charles Darwin's birth 200 years ago and the seminal 'Origin of Species' publication 150 years ago. The Vatican has a science department that advises the Pope down. This has made for some suprising admissionsand ahuge contrast to the deplorable lies of the protestant Creationists of which there are approximately 100 million in the US though fortunately now one less at least in the White House.

Numerology For Blokes. Numerology Really Works.
Did some serious numerological study on Saturday and was able to verify the predictive power of a lot of carefull and methodically combined measurements and specifications.
4.155" bore + 3.35" stroke + 6000cc + V8 + 13:1 Comp + 102 Octane avgas revved to 7500 = about 650 HP. These numbers will have a strong influence in my life and the life of others and are strongly portentious of podium glory and ranking elevation...

Pip. Lots of fauna and flora lost for sure. Interesting that there was a report of people saving their own lives by using Wombat burrows as bunkers in the Kinglake hills.
A lot of police request for people not to fire tour are being made. All understandable common courtesy (though why do we feel this way?) and logistically practical rational of course. Interesting though that humans, like other species, have a strong instinct to see and learn from what has caused the demise, the death or injury of their fellows. This obviously has a survival benefit in evolutionary terms as well as practical ones.
As a mean, an average, men stayed and defended their properties and women and children fled fires where they could. This is of course the strong territorial instinct we posess; one that in the normal course in our safe, ordered and regulated society rarely surfaces as a desperate fight.
My business experience at the BDM, Births, Deaths and Marriages registery, as opposed to any Bondage, Discipline and Masochism was suprising. There was very little identification required for me to get the info I required, certainly not the 70 or 100 point sort of proof I expected.
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 16, 2009 4:31 AM

How do I feel this good is so bad, does any one's are just like me? When is good is really good but I feel so bad still, what do I really looking for. I'm looking for perfection but it's impossible. I think my personal illness is boredom. And I don't know what those boredom are? Once I achieved things the excitement is diminished.What do I want in life ...I maintain my position and eventually prosper in many aspect in life...all of sudden things are not my hidebound tradition. Having reached the stability in excellent family life, career still intact, relationship is promising but i think I'm ruin all of it. My bestfriends gave me advices as i opened it up, sometimes don't understand me at all, they're thinking I was definitely stupid,.. of all things are infront of my door but still looking for unsound gesture of refusal to recognized anything.

Does anyone feel the way I felt about myself? I'm sorry to tell of all this things but I have too as I am confused !

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 15, 2009 11:10 PM

I went to Trans today, a large asian grocery supplier in Northbridge and realised how I am missing cooking my curries and hot asian goodies. I am really quite looking forward to cooler weather this year, which is a first for me. I like to cook curry and use some very hot chilli in my cooking. Also like seafood dishes with a dash of the good old chilli. I have a courtyard out the side of my house and many a pleasant night has been spent having a curry and chilli night with good friends in the winter. I had a wood heater at one stage but traded it in for a gas which is much easier. It's so much fun sitting outside on a cool night with lashings of hot fragrant food and good wine and good company. Going to do more of that this winter, we had a lot of fun.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 15, 2009 8:48 PM

Colleen, sorry to hear about yoru car and job loss.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 15, 2009 8:23 PM

The irony isf being asked why you haven't changed at the start of the marriage and if you have then why you haven't changed again at the end!

Yes, Perth we need security measures, but my complaint is that I hve a perfectly good certificate, and even an old passports issued in both my birth name and my husbands to explain all names. Unnecessary Revenue raising I think.

Decoratress you are really going to stuff up the genealogists further down the track!

Be a bit careful too because name changes can make a big difference in legal matters especially Wills and Estates and Insurance claims .
My mother hates her fiirst name and has never used it but it appears on some essential documents. She has spent her life hiding it and if absolutely necessary putting the name second. She has also lied about her age(to this day) even to her doctor. The real age is only on some documents.She gets such a thrill when people tell her how great she is "for her age" and wonders what they would say if she told them the truth.Makes her feel great.

She was nearly refused an operation recently because she made a mistake and told someone her true age at the door of the theatre and then they legally had two different identities...one vain 80+ lady and paperwork for someone born a few years later!..What a fuss, but not as much as the trouble caused in transferring things to her after my father died.

Back in the days prior to computers it was easy to get away with this sort of stuff, but not anymore.

I am only thankful that I have been married once (so far...) imagine Elizabeth Taylor renewing her passport...

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 15, 2009 8:21 PM

Posted by: decoratress at February 15, 2009 12:52 PM

A girl friend of mine changed her surname after a really bad marriage to St. Clair..She thought it classy ...,don't know about that..

Names are very evocative..my daughter's name is Dominique....she looks very french and classy........purely by accident.....the only name, we, her parents could agree on six weeks after her birth........ after searching all english and french baby name....The form I filled in, as her unmarried mother...had six names crossed out and was completed finally in the office of births deaths and marriages.....says are great deal about her patents relationship....

but if I was to change my name...it would be to fifi.....I luv the name....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 15, 2009 7:53 PM

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 14, 2009 10:01 PM

That's ok......I don't hold grudges......but thanks for saying that.

Another bad day, my car cost me $360.00 today. Broke down. imagine I am saying all the b words............and still no job.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 15, 2009 6:59 PM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 14, 2009 7:51 PM
given name or birth name = religion neutral rather than "Christian name".

Yes, I wonder how our fellow Buddhist Muslim and Hindu etc etc....Australians feel when they are asked for their Christain name.

As a atheist I prefer "first name" Enough said.

Colleen (first name)

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 15, 2009 6:56 PM

I guess it shows that the passport office is actually checking things though and that has to be a good thing doesn't it. I know it can be frustrating, but they are just doing their job, better to be safe than sorry. I personally couldn't care less what my surname is as it's only a tag on. My kids and I all have the same surname, that of their father and my ex. I actually haven't really been asked why I haven't changed it, but people who know me well would realise I wouldn't bother, just seems to be an extra job to do when I have other more important things going on at the moment. I can understand though if it brings back cruel and unhappy memories and is a trigger. I think that if I were to change from my previous married name I would pick a new name though, one i really liked and went well with my christian name. I think that would be a lot more fun.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 15, 2009 2:50 PM

For my part, I changed my surname as soon as the divorce came through. I was becoming single after 24yrs, so had no desire to tie myself to an era which had drawn to a close. Aside from which, I'd never much liked my ex's Irish surname.

I didn't revert to my family name, as again, it was linked to a past which I was happy to leave behind. Being adopted, I also had the choice to take my birth mother's name (McPherson-McGregor), but she had no part in my life & I'm not a fan of cumbersome hyphenating.

In fact, it was fairly difficult to find an entirely new name. There are many criteria to be taken into account... ease of spelling, association with nationality, etc.
The pin in the phone directory was tried, though if I'd accepted the random approach my surname would be TheMelbourneMapCompany... um.... I don't think so....hahaha!

Eventually I found a name I was happy with.. it had some meaning for me, began with M (a lot of my artwork has been signed 'Deco' M), is easily spelled & works with my first name.
While I was at it, I decided to make a couple of sweeping changes to the rest of my name.. very liberating it was too.
My first name was shortened to reflect what people called me (only Medicare & the ATO used my full given name), I dropped two deceased grandmothers' names in the middle (they won't mind, bless them!) & took the completely new surname.

Interestingly, with such radical change, my name remained numerologically the same...
...so I guess that means I'm still the same person...

.... phew, that's a relief!

Posted by: decoratress at February 15, 2009 12:52 PM

Hey Greg - maybe grade 6 is the age these days. Heaven forbid, but news overnight showing a 13 year old father and the 15 year old mother is utterly beyond belief.

Absolutely shocking. What ever happened to kids being kids?

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 15, 2009 12:20 PM

Well, here is one more who has kept her maiden name. :0) I didnt see any reasons to change it when I got married. It symbolises who I am. :0) It is part of my own identity. And my ex, as a wise man, truly understood it, or, as a tolerant man, just coudnt do anything about my being stubborn? :0)

And now joking. Oh, it must be that I am not a good woman, if I am, according to Marcus logic that men find it hard to let go a good woman, then I shouldnt be on RSVP :0) Well, I think both my ex and I think I am a good woman. And moreover, my notion is that better be honest and upfront about who I am than colourful packaging myself. :0) And of course, how others think of ourselves is totally others freedom.

There is so much for us to learn about our opposite gender, isnt there?

And I hope everyone has had something to smile about on this years Valentines Day! :0)

Posted by: ahappyending at February 15, 2009 1:20 AM

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 14, 2009 2:17 PM

Jen, well things were getting a bit boring and with all the depressing news in the last week I had to say something to get the blood running.

I made the mistake on friday of doing an RSVP search of females any age in the Marysville and Kinglake post codes. Perhaps not unexpectedly with only a couple of exceptions they had no RSVP activity after 6 Feb. It does not bother me much if adults get killed especially older adults, I sort of believe in the 3 score and 10 rule but I get very upset about children losing their lives. And I have been told an awful lot have. i just cant bear to look at the lists.

I am so glad that you and your family are OK.

Fifi, I have a number of objections to extreme feminism but I do believe that a woman or indeed any human being is not 'property". There is a word for it called slavery.

BTW, I got into big trouble with my partner this week after I found out that one of the ways to identify an unrecognisable body was if they have had a knee replacement the artificial metal knee can be identified by its serial number. And bonus, as they are made of titanium they are almost indestructable. My partner has just had her knee replaced I suggested she give me the serial number. I also suggested that if she went swimming and was attacked by a shark she should offer her left leg (the one with the titanium knee) to the shark so that it could be identified later. For some weird reason she was not impressed with my ideas.
rgds grego

Posted by: grego7 at February 14, 2009 10:50 PM

Colleen: my apologies for criticising you last week. I didn't have enough empathy to realise that you needed some light relief (eg. blogging on relatively trivial topics) from your heavy burden of caring so deeply about the bad things that were happening.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 14, 2009 10:01 PM

Maiden name? Maiden over? I also prefer birth name.

When we divorced, my ex immediately changed her surname to help her rid herself completely of me, but NOT to the one that her father's father had dreamt up for himself in Tasmania in the late 1800s.

She went a generation further back, and took the family name of his father, a tailor who had refused to marry the barmaid mother of his child. So the child was raised by his maternal grandmother, a discharged convict.

On the other hand, my younger daughter (the one who went with her mother, and I didn't see her for the next 12 years) kept her patriarchal family name when she married. She told me that name was worth $50K a year in the Qld public service then, and 50% more now. So she wasn't going to become a nobody in the workplace, just for tradition's sake.
Good on them both for taking opposite sides that aligned with their personal values.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 14, 2009 9:57 PM

grego, when I married I decided to 'keep' my family name for work and banking etc The Irish defiant rebel in me and my blow for feminism in one.

I married a man who worked in one of the most chauvinistic, traditional organisations in the country. I was constantly questioned on "Why?' and considered a bit flighty by some.
When I was pregnant with my first child I had to attend a specialist appointment.
On arrival at the office I gave them my name and relevant details. Next thing they ask for my HUSBANDS details. When I gave them his name they questioned me as to marital status since the names did not match. Next they asked HIS place of employment. I told them that I was employed and quite able to pay the Dr. Not good enough. A woman(let alone one who had a suspicious lack of husbands last name) could not be trusted to pay for herself. Husband had to be guarantor and not good enough to know where he worked and his name, they actually asked for his rank and serial number! I kid you not. I was still young enough to meekly give it to them. Now I would be giving it to them in another way!

A few years after that when I had been married ten years already,I had cause to send change of address details to my bank.

Silly me foolishly sent them the generic letter I had written to send to all who needed notifying which also had my husbands name on it. A few weeks later I received a letter from which bank with a happy "Congratulations on your recent marriage. Your new card is on its way!"
Recent marriage? I had not requested any change to my banking arrangements just the address.

By then I had two kids and never got around to writing to demand the bank change it all back to my name.

Post divorce it was just too much work and like the others said by that time I was known by my husbands name and had qualifications in that name and a myriad of other things not easy to change.

Before I got married I used to fantasize about being Mrs TE ? and practised writing it in all forms Mrs C ?; Mr and Mrs TE?;
Ms C B hyphen ? ; Chris and T ?

If only I knew the trouble getting married would cause me thirty years down the track.
Bloody passport office.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 14, 2009 8:50 PM

But MarKus, that woman has probably left the queue by now so I can't rely on being as lucky as you....

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 14, 2009 8:17 PM

Eww, Greg, that is a bit harsh of your mate to say that.....rude actually......
On the changing back to family name, l happen to like my surname, l have had it longer than my "maiden"name and don't really see any advantage in changing it....

The closure in the relationship has long since occured for me. I figure it is me and l like being who l am now.....plus imagine the paperwork. Couldn't really be bothered................K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 14, 2009 7:52 PM

given name or birth name = religion neutral rather than "Christian name".

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 14, 2009 7:51 PM

Mad, I'm not quite understanding why you are looking for a mens advocate. There are womens advocates who deal with pay issues, i.e., equal pay for equal jobs etc. but what are you looking for a mens advocate to do. If you had problems in the law courts then surely that is a matter for your solicitor on appeal and if you had problems with domestic violence then that is a police issue.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 14, 2009 6:36 PM

Valentines Day 2009.

Dear Diary,

This morning I was whisked away to a winery for a private wine tasting, followed by lunch is a delightful restaurant overlooking a river and wildlife reseve. A special bottle of sparkling wine accompanied lunch(jordered "just because") and the conversation was about wine and art and theatre and travel. I received lots of compliments on my handbag and shoes, and on the way home arrangements were made for a weekend away very soon. We talked about renting a place where we could stay in and cook up a storm together while drinking more wine.
At the gate we kissed and hugged goodbye and said "I love you"

Then I drove off.... leaving the two 'boys' to spend a private Valentines night together...I meanwhile am trawling the world via RSVP and still cursing the passport office....

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 14, 2009 6:08 PM

I changed my name back to my family name a couple of years ago. I did the most important paperwork first...drivers licence, passport, medicare, banking....that sort of thing and then gradually going through the other things as they arise. So still have a few items in my married name. Makes you realise how much stuff has your name on it.

I asked my children if they minded that I changed back but it didn't bother them at all..they are all adults anyway, so it's not like they need to explain at school or anything. I must admit though, that after 25 years of using a different name reverting takes awhile to get used too. For me part of the process of restoring myself.

Posted by: aquamanda56 at February 14, 2009 4:33 PM

Posted by: grego7 at February 14, 2009 1:28 PM

"Maiden name" or "nee" is still commonly used on some official documents although "birth name'' is becoming more popular due to it's gender neutral status.

But it is good to see a man agreeing with feminists on the issue of the use of the word. They argue that the traditional word "maiden" demeans a woman by labelling her according to her sexual status and they argue that it also labels a woman as the property of a man.

So thanks for that.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 14, 2009 2:37 PM

Posted by: grego7 at February 14, 2009 1:28 PM
"As a mate said, definition of a virgin, the ugliest girl in grade six."

Oh, Greg, that is awful. A terrible thing to say. And Grade 6? Even worse.

Re the names though. I use both my names for different reasons. But actually think I will go back to my family name completely soon. Can just imagine all the paperwork to be done with all the different departments etc. Aargh!

But then there is all that completely different dynamic of a change of name. Numerology and all that. Because I do believe in the power of numbers and the influences that they seem to have in our lives. Actually though it really would bring even more of a closure to a divorce. Just another step in being open to the new.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 14, 2009 2:17 PM

A quick 'thank you' for those who've contacted me expressing concern for my safety.. whilst the fires locally were uncomfortably close, the Dandenong Ranges have excellent fire management. Ash Wednesday is still imprinted on our consciousness, & I'm proud that the local fire services have learned from it & implemented procedural improvements.

My GP was in the first wave of volunteer surgeons, & what he told me makes me feel overwhelming admiration for the medicos & support staff involved. What they saw will always remain with them.

Love & healing energy to all who've been caught up in the disaster.

Deco

Posted by: decoratress at February 14, 2009 1:36 PM

Posted by: fifilafume at February 13, 2009 7:45 PM

Fifi,

I think it would be decades since any australian bride could justifiably use the term "maiden name" at her wedding. As a mate said, definition of a virgin, the ugliest girl in grade six.

I prefer the term family name. My ex did not change her name when we married and I was very proud that she did not. It caused us a fair bit of bother when we moved to Tasmania in 1982 as local officialdom, bank managers etc could not get their head around the idea of a woman keeping her family name. It did not bother me occasionally being called Mr 'wifes family name"

Last year when my partner and I were thinking of getting married she wanted to change her surname to mine but I would not hear of it. She had built a career using that name even though it was her ex-husbands name.

I have been always surprised by how many divorced women keep their ex husbands name. Having changed their original family name they then keep the name of their ex. Often the guy they hated.

The custom of a woman changing her name at marriage is relatively new and I believe started amongst the peasantry and lower classes in the 1700s. The upper classes always kept their family names and upper class children frequently took their mother"s family name as their own.

I realise some women keep their married name because they want the same name as their children. This is based on the silly notion that a "family line" descends via the father. Judaism rather sensibly has it descending via the female. After all a woman always knew the child was hers whereas a man never knows ( without DNA testing) that a child is his and DNA testing is very recent.The cuckolded husband syndrome was the subject of fairly acromonious recent blog debate.

In my family our great grandmother who came to Australia by herself at 15 years of age in 1860 is still referred to by her family name and that is also used on her grave.
rgds grego

Posted by: grego7 at February 14, 2009 1:28 PM

Ah yes Kaz, Weta has been in regular contact. He visited last week when we went to Leonard Cohen together. (My review on one of the music blogs.) So glad we got to see that before all this stuff happened. His neck of the woods deeply affected too. The whole thing is just terrible. But again beautiful friendships shine through.

What would we do without friends hey? Often friendships mean more than family. Sad to say but very true.

Oh, Happy Valentines Day to everyone on the site. Hopefully romance is abounding for many. (She sighs.)

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 14, 2009 1:10 PM

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 14, 2009 8:15 AM

"Human kind at its best is certainly shining through. No-one should feel totally alone"

Quote by Ben Stein

"It is inevitable that some defeat will enter even the most victorious life. The human spirit is never finished when it is defeated...it is finished when it surrenders."

so true,

the only faith I have is in the human spirit....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 14, 2009 10:59 AM

Gosh, Willow you get less for murder these days!!

Jen we have had regular updates through our friend Weta on you and your community, and it is so good to see that you are safe and well.
Hopefully the weather will be mild and kind to the fire ravaged areas of our state......
A pleasant day here, no wind thank goodness, though a haze of smoke permeates the peninsula at the moment.

Tske care Jen, our thoughts are with you.........K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 14, 2009 10:57 AM

Oh and Marcus, sorry I missed part of your question - what was he like..? Defnately what you'd call an "alpha".Had a very big presence, very confident and was popular although he preferred his own company.

He was charm presonified when he had to (ie was paid/employed) but otherwise was quite blunt. A lot of men seem to mistake "tactless" for "honesty". I loved that he shared my love for animals and never complained when another stray or injured creature found itself into our yard. Even when the "poor defenceless bandicoot" that "only eats worms and grubs" attacked our chickens. So I guess he was tolerant. He must have felt like Dougall to my Zebidee (only over 40's will probably understand that reference to the Magic Roundabout).

Perth, Im not quite sure if this Govt official knew what he was talking about. Neither of us have bothered verifying it - makes for a good story though - 20 years "shackled" to each other for no reason....(just kidding!).

Posted by: willow29 at February 14, 2009 8:27 AM

Now a bit light-hearted.

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 13, 2009 9:10 PM
" The upside was I memorably met a very pleasant mouth organ playing woman in the queue at the office; I couldn't do the alteration online, who invited me back to her car..."

So Marcus - What did you 'play' for her?

hehe

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 14, 2009 8:19 AM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 11, 2009 6:58 PM

Not blogging(or not doing anything else that could be considered frivolous) is not going to help the victims now ,but it may be of great help to others including the surviviors.. It is not just the survivors who need support and normalcy and familiarity, it is also the rescuers and helpers and members of all the services involved. Who knows how many are members here who will be looking for the interaction and familiar entertainment?

Must agree Lynath. Being confined to home and being on "Alert" it is nice to jump on the computer (well after it was back on after 4 days) to catch up with friends and familiar 'stuff'.

A blood red full moon is showing in the sky this morning. The air is very heavy with smoke and even though the house is completely shut up it is through the house as well.

A lot of people seem to just be in a daze when you go into town. People stop and chat. You see all over the place, little groups of people talking about their own experiences. You also see that generosity of spirit and the outpouring of care and concern.

Out beautiful town hall (where my daughter works sometimes when it's used as the picture theatre) is the relief and information centre for everyone. There is a constant stream of people mingling, talking, getting help, dropping off stuff, etc.

You can be nothing but proud of our wonderful communities, the volunteers, firefighters, government representatives, the police. And Christine Nixon, wow, what a job she is doing.

Human kind at its best is certainly shining through. No-one should feel totally alone.

Thanks again for all the care and concern shown me. Even offers of accomodation if I needed it from several of you. I was overwhelmed by the genorisity. I will write to all of you who have been in contact, but a big thankyou for now.

Love Jen xxx

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 14, 2009 8:15 AM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 13, 2009 6:29 PM

"Give me the name of that Minister MAD"

In Victoria the "Minister for Women's Interests" is the Honourable Maxine MORAND MLA.

In Western Australia the Honourable Robyn McSweeney MLCis "Minster for Women’s Interests"

The Commonwealth "Minister for Status of Women" is the Hon Tanya Plibersek MP

Look up the relevant Parliamentary website for other states.

There is no "Minister for Men's Interests" etc in any jurisdiction. Blatant official 20th Century sexism.

There are plenty of examples of both sexes being discrimnated against. All sexism should be eliminated.

MAD

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 14, 2009 1:56 AM

Marcus - I was happy about it because all my scientific papers were under my maiden name. But the best reason was that he thought my family was nicer than his and he felt more welcome and a part of it.

Kaz, its like the Paul Hogan script where Strop fills his social security form and the bloke says "what's your name?" and he said "Kevin".
"How do you spell it?"
"G-R-O-K-L."

Posted by: willow29 at February 14, 2009 1:35 AM

Hi Marcus, It is so sad and so many animals would have been wiped out, hundreds even thousands and the beautiful plants in the bush, although with all the undergrowth I suppose a lot of them would have struggled also. Apart from the political implications of relying on the green vote I can't understand why all advice was ignored re the undergrowth. I suppose so many people there also felt quite safe and thought oh well if a fire comes through I have a garden hose. It's just an unbelievable situation and a disaster waiting to happen. I am also at a loss to understand what was supposed to happen if all the undergrowth was never cleared, surely the forests would just end up strangling themselves. It is so sad and hopefully a lot of lessons can be learned.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 13, 2009 10:42 PM

Same here, though when my ex filled out my daughters birth details it apparently looked like he had written "Keven" instead of Karen, and so on her birth certificate her mother, me, is called "Keven".
She recently applied to get a passport as she is travelling overseas in April.
As l do not have a current passport and am not naturalised, l had to supply my original Document of Identity that enabled my family to come to Australia in 1965. Naturally it said my name was and still is Karen.
So my daughter had to apply for a new birth certificate with my correct name on it.
Talk about chasing your tail........
All because someone had bad writing......K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 13, 2009 10:29 PM

Hello to all on here

NO time to read it tonight, as I am busy.

I just wanted to pop in to say hello to all my fellow Bloggers. It's been about 5-6 months since I was on here...but it looks like this place is still going strong!!!

Starryeyez is back...LOL...

Watch out RSVP

Mwahahahahah !!!!

Posted by: starryeyez at February 13, 2009 10:13 PM

What happened Willow, How can you think you are married and then find out you are not ? I actually would never be bothered marrying again. I am not religious and just couldn't be bothered with all the hassle.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 13, 2009 10:00 PM

willow February 13, 2009 8:19 PM
Your husband changed his name to match your surname willow? How did you feel about that? What was he like?
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 13, 2009 9:47 PM

It's cool here in Perth although a little humid. We have had one 'hot' day and then it was only 39 or 40. Today it is threatening to rain but can't quite make up its mind but not particularly hot and really quite windy. We don't have clouds but there is a colourless sky. The weather can't seem to make up its mind any more and the seasons seem to be blurred. When we had our property in Qld we had massive fire breaks that were bulldozed each side and also the back of the property. These were checked regularly by the fire services andalso we were obligated to keep them free and open at all times. I used to ride the fire trails regularly as they were great for a good gallop. I do find it rather disturbing as there seemed to be no control in Victoria, either fire breaks or backburning. This is so sad.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 13, 2009 9:40 PM

Lynathdairy. I had a similar situation applying for my passport. Whoever filled the original certificate spelt my name with a k instead of a c. This caused considerable clerical consternation and me delay expense and inconvenience.
The upside was I memorably met a very pleasant mouth organ playing woman in the queue at the office; I couldn't do the alteration online, who invited me back to her car...

Pip. I have a great interest in knowing peoples sexual orientations, their social genders if you like. There is something fascinating even profound about this information. I will come up with a ethological explanation in due course.
You are right about about me holding onto things that are connecting. I have the 2 porcelain dinosaurs given to me by my nanna for my 2nd birthday on my dressing table.
The dresser, prized, is Australian hardwood, restored maily by my mother, with a nicely proprtioned bevelled edge, wooden framed and pivoted, oval mirror Along side them is a rosewood box from the 1920's with a warped lid from my grandfather's bedside table. In the box are all sorts of mementoes and inadvertant girly left behinds. I have a pair of opal cufflinks from Valentines day 15 yers ago and a now half full bottle of Joop given to me same the occasion 2 years back. There are a couple of antique hat pins in the box too. I was in the habit of collecting them and giving them as a practical gift. Any girl who travels on Public Transport should carry a long hatpin and be prepared to use it against unwelcome frotteurising fellow travellers I would say to her...
There is also a small souvenir Tasmanian Devil, a memento from my Indian girfriend and one that I hope will not be a memento of the species. Devils are now listed as endangered as the facial tumor transmissible cancer wreaks havoc. One of the many sad aspects of the Victorian bushfires is they look like doing great damage to the limited habitat of our faunal emblem the Ledbeaters Possum, and also our bird emblem, the Helmeted Honeyeater which is also specialised in where it can live. fortunately the floral emblem, the Pink Heath is widespread and unlikely to suffer the numbing ignominy, the collective moral and spiritual failure, of human caused extinction. This sentiment obviously does not apply to metrosexuals.
You mentioned Kings Park, with regards to an arsonist. The cops have caught and charged a bloke here with arson. That 400Ha reserve popped up in an article in the Science section of The Australian on botanists at the nursery there who are doing good work on identifying, studying breeding and seed banking arid area native orchids. Interestingly Kew Gardens in the UKpossibly the worlds preeminent botannic gardens have a West Australian as one of the main men.
A 44 gallon drum of aviation fuel arrived today and I am off to the dyno to test the engine of a prodidgiously powerfull special sports racing car that I do a lot of design and parts manufacuring work on. It was booked in last saturday but hot conditions are not ideal.
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 13, 2009 9:10 PM

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 12, 2009 11:35 PM

When I was working as a Woman's Advocate, more than half my clients were men.

In many instances it makes absolutely no different..the assistance and advice is exactly the same, particularly in the Family �ourt.

I have on more than one occassion given support and advice to a man who I knew was driven by a desire to make her life as difficult as possible.

Likewise with women, so I did not judge on a persons sex, I just tried to help the person navigate the Family Court system as best I could with their childrens interests my main priority.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 13, 2009 8:26 PM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 13, 2009 6:29 PM
My ex husband had to go through exactly the same rigmarole because it was he who changed his name when we got married - (only to be told that we werent actually married in the first place).

Posted by: willow29 at February 13, 2009 8:19 PM

I kept my married name as my kids have that name and I just couldn't be bothered will all the paperwork. Everyone had known me by that name for years and it didn't bother me at all so just left it. My ex is okay, he lives his life and we live ours and we are still quite a good partnership where our kids are concerned. Also my prev. mum in law passed away not too long ago and I am still friends with most of his family and was always good friends with my mum in law. Changing names always seemed a little too time consuming for me and just couldn't be bothered as it wasn't an important thing for me. Mind you I can understand it if you want to forget everything about a previous relationship and it shouldn't be that hard.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 13, 2009 8:09 PM

I think sometimes it's a matter of catching up and I suppose traditionally womens refuges were set up because they had children with them and still do, of course. Obviously things are changing now and I think we are seeing the facilities catching up. I don't know of other states but there are places here where men can go to seek help, usually starting with their local gp who will direct them or perhaps advise them what to do, whether it be refugues psychological help or the police. I don't know really but I would think that the local gp would be the way to go and perhaps move out as a lot of people do of course.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 13, 2009 7:58 PM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 13, 2009 6:29 PM

Like you thelynathdiary I kept my married surname. By the time I was divorced I was universally known by that name. I could not see the point in changing it. And for many women their children have their father's surname so mum also keeps it.

Many younger women are now keeping their "maiden name"" for exactly the reasons you state.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 13, 2009 7:45 PM

Give me the name of that Minister MAD

Here is an example of the everyday blatant discrimination faced by women;

I wanted to renew my passport having foolishly let the old one expire.
Pick up form from post office..fill it in...request work colleague to fill in gurantor section(including giving information that I felt embarrassed to ask her to supply)
Go to post office with documents. Stnad in a queue explaining myself to a postal clerk while ten people listen in.
Be patient....I am getting to the point....
I have never changed my name back to my former name post divorce so had to take my marriage certificate to explain original name change.
Am informed "Sorry! The Original Marriage Certificate you have is not enough. You have to take time off work to go into the city, pay a parking fee to park, take all your original proof of identity documents to another clerk at Births Deaths and Marriages Officialdom and stand in a mile long queue, pay another fee and request a Marriage Certificate.
Even though I have been Divorced for ten years I have to pay for a Marriage Certificate, be reminded of it all again and be inconvenienced all because as a woman I was expected to change my name on marriage.

A divorced man does not have to do this running around taking time off work or paying extra fees to get a passport.

I am therefore discriminated against financially and personally.

I intend to write to the appropriate anti discrimination commissioner to complain.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 13, 2009 6:29 PM

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 11, 2009 7:42 PM

TW, keep replying, keep getting moderated notwithstanding no aggro (why would I), no insults, assertions, derogatory statements blah blah, just can't get a reply posted. I understand selective others have the same issue. Perhaps my questioning of what it is about me the moderators don't like and I'll see what I can do. Perhaps I should model myself on perth as she seems to have no problem getting posted no matter what she says or who she insults. Can't be multiple profiles as she has more than one whilst I do not.
Anyway, to respond, just on the small chance this will be posted. I never attempted to imply that Colleen is a puppet and nor am I. my only point was that there are many puppets who write an 'opinion' to which people respond. My question was why would anyone respond to an alleged opinion which cannot be valid as it is espoused by a fabricated personality. I honestly can't see anything wrong with the above ms moderator but we'll see.

Posted by: asitis09 at February 13, 2009 5:57 PM

Ha, l wonder if all the metrosexuals who inhabit Cleo's bachelor of the year are aware that they are extinct ??

Menfems are the 2000's answer to the SNAG doncha know, Marcus......
As for someone wanting to be a surfboard or mobile phone all l can say is EEWWW.........

MAD, you are lucky you have not been told to harden the F*** .
Its not just girls who can't get by without their mum.

Most women who are in need of help would usually talk to friends rather than a womans refuge...Aren't they for victims of domestic violence only.........K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 13, 2009 5:40 PM

Posted by: auntykaz at February 12, 2009 9:21 PM

Men tend to be natural born problem solvers. It's the "men are from Mars" mindset...hence, if they cant solve their own problems, many of us would rather to see it as "not a problem", rather than ask for help.

Blokes feel worse about their problems, if they have to ask for help, rather than better.
So, it has to get pretty bad before he does.

That scenario makes it even worse than it need be.

Posted by: eccehomoergo at February 13, 2009 1:23 PM

I know this post is not about dating...but I love animals...so here it is..

Don't forget the animals.

Just a thought…today, I have made my donation to the RSPCA Victoria……I have been thinking (don’t faint, I am more than a blonde moment)!! Anyway, the people are getting massive help, it is a diaster what has happened to them but what about all the animals, it is tragic what is happening to them as well.

So here is the link I used to get to the RSPCA at Victoria, they have a Bushfire link set up on their home page.

http://www.rspcavic.org

Anyway …just my thoughts, have a lovely Friday...jewels

Posted by: junebaby57 at February 13, 2009 12:44 PM

I can never understand the reasoning behind getting so excited about someones sexual orientation. I really couldn't care less, surely personality and happiness and how good a person they are should be the benchmark. Seems all a little immature and petty to me and people should just mind their own business.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 13, 2009 8:12 AM

Posted by: iaminperth at February 12, 2009 9:17 PM

Mad, What's a Mister for womens interests,

Sorry , typo, Minister for Women's Interests. One in every Government. Where is the Minister for Men's Interests?

There are many men's refuges around the place and a lot of help lines available to men .

Living in Albany I couldn't find anyone or any one useful when I needed help. Just a lot of psychobabble from the so called "Help Lines". The so called "Domestic Violence Help Line" explicitly told me they would not help because I was a man.

If not for a few close friends and my Mum I would have been completely stuffed.

Be interested to know where there is a mens refuge in PErth other than the type for street derros.

I think there is still a terrible stigma when it comes to males or even females seeking help and that is something all society is addressing at the moment.

You are right.

MAD (so I guess that means I'm not BAD if it's either or :-)

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 12, 2009 11:35 PM

we have snags, menfems, metrosexuals, ... Or are they all "low rankers"??

Yep

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 12, 2009 11:26 PM

What about being who you are, just being your authentic individual person that you were placed on this earth to be. Marcus, I only see you as a sensitive caring individual with a leaning to special good things in life. I see you as quite an introverted person really with deep and caring feelings and a strong sense of decency. I especially think that you would be very respectful towards females and children. I also think you would be a little of a hoarder of special things that mean much to you from your past associations. Just my thoughts and I think you are probably a very special individual and extemely sensitive.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 12, 2009 11:08 PM

thanks, Grego - it's good to be here, surrounding sadness or not....

Posted by: malsie at February 12, 2009 10:57 PM

auntykaz at February 12, 2009 9:21 PM
Very observant Kaz.
Metrosexuals are extinct now that Thorpey has been outed with his Brazilian bf.
Snags are a femmo and social learning inculcated female sub-gender so immediately suspects for all sorts of beta behaviour. Menfems sound like a woman's personal product. We had one here a while ago who wanted to be somebodies surfboard or was that mobile phone?
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 12, 2009 10:29 PM

Ahh, What ever happened to weathering the storm. Aint got no room for tears, leave that to the girls. Get up off those tear soggy pillows and be a real man.

Soft............

Lol

Posted by: tassiedude1 at February 12, 2009 10:10 PM

Men not being able to talk about their feelings......well they have tongues, don't they ??
Surely this manly bluster is a bit old hat these days.....we have snags, menfems, metrosexuals, what, do none of them talk about their feelings ?? Or are they all "low rankers"??
Blokey blokes, indeed..........K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 12, 2009 9:21 PM

Mad,
What's a Mister for womens interests, sounds a little kinky to me. There are many men's refuges around the place and a lot of help lines available to men . Whether they use them or not is another thing entirely. I think there is still a terrible stigma when it comes to males or even females seeking help and that is something all society is addressing at the moment.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 12, 2009 9:17 PM

iaminperth at 12:40 AM : Hmmmm. The plot thickens ....

Or was that only the gravy jelling? Think I'll skip the projection and eat out tonight, while getting photo duplicates done for my burnt-out friend. Seeyez all.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 12, 2009 7:47 PM

grego7 at 3.11pm: I come from country on the Qld/NSW border that's mainly open mitchell grass, and there what we feared were dry storms - thunder and lightning (usually just after dark), but no rain or just a few isolated spits.

When it's very dry, every lightning bolt that hits the ground rather than going between clouds will start a new fire. If there's a bit of rain, the fire will burn maybe half a football field and then be rained out. If no rain. thers's another one to ring with all available fire trucks.
.....................................

and at 12:26 AM last night: Oh dear! When did you lose them, mate?

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 12, 2009 7:31 PM

Whilst I agree that arsonists should face the full force of the law to do that you first have to catch them. Arson in the bush is a particularly difficult crime to catch the culprit.

Over the last few days I have been visiting the CFA website and checking their incident report which hows every fire reported. The staggering thing is the number of grass fires occurring. They have run into the hundreds over the last week or so. Not all of these are arson so a lot must be as a result of carelessness eg cigarette butts out of cars etc.

I would expect the same situation in other states. In the end it does not matter much whether a bushfire is started deliberately or via stupidity the destruction and loss of life human and animal is the same.

I am not suggesting lenient treatment to arsonists, no way, but I suspect unthinking behaviour by normal people causes far more fires than those by arsonists.

The beauty and magic of Australia is that it is an untamed land. It can kill yer. Its no pussy cat country like most of say the UK or Europe. So we all have to be very careful especially during Jan and Feb.
rgds grego

Posted by: grego7 at February 12, 2009 3:11 PM

I'm English orginally, TW, but have an ex partner who was Scottish and used to use that expression frequently - it's a good one!

Posted by: malsie at February 12, 2009 10:50 AM

Very good article written by Paul Wilson re arsonists. He states categorically they are not mentally ill people and that they are angry people who crave attention. They then like to come out and play the hero afterwards guaranteeing themselves more attention. He believes they should be hit with the full force of the law as they plan their burning a lot time prior and it is executed to do the most damage. I guess in saying that, there must be some psychologically damaged people amongst the bunch but I tend to believe what my dad said once 'there are mad people and there are bad people' and he worked with both the whole of his working life. The use of the term 'mad' today is very derogatory I know but dad entered his profession many many years ago and that was the term used at the time. My father passed away a few years ago at aged 84.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 12, 2009 10:25 AM

Couldn't believe it today when I came home. A divvy van was blocking the street and 2 fire trucks where close to the front of my house. Neighbour 2 doors away's lounge room had been burnt out courtesy of a suspected electrical short. The rear of the property is a benign bikie's club house. Burly blokes were milling around drinking longnecks and conducting a post mortem.
Absolutely nothing to do with rampant bush, flammable eucalyptus oil vapour or climate change was the verdict. Last time he burnt his kitchen out when he left his chip cooker on and fell asleep pissed watching the FA cup final. Nearly died of smoke inhalation. My long extension lead is now powering his fridge.
I nearly set fire to my kitchen once cooking something in oil. It ignited the plastic pouch holding the Fire Blanket I had positioned close to the stove.

Lynath, your sharp ears are superbly tuned for picking up on the faint plaintive male cries for relationship help. My comment was made tongue in cheek and was going to include a wittiscism about funded women's counselling. The males ARE often faint cries and as you suggest men like to be given counselling informally; perhaps to the extent of receiving or accessing it, anonomously if at all. Men are not as inclined to share their relationship woes; their grief, as women are. This is self evident; and seemingly a source of puzzlement, even irritation for some women. It is something felt by men as difficult, awkward to articulate as feeling and emotion as opposed to the explanatory mechanics of relationship disintegration. I won't say collectively men have little insight into their own processes but when reason and logic are short at one end of an explanation, instinct could be at work. Briefly, incompletely, my take. Male to male relationships are characterised by a more defined heirarchy than females. High ranking men by definition have more sexual success than low ranking (and by sexual success I dont necessarily mean quantity. Quality in the form of a highly attractive mate is indicative).
Displaying emotion and openly speaking about the reasons for what could be perceived as a lack of sexual success, the defection of a wife, could be rank lowering and potentially damaging. Also showing emotion publically, in context in a group counselling session say, over a 'mere' woman is an indication of a lack of sexual opportunity and thus lowering and weakening.
Cheers Marcus.

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 12, 2009 4:51 AM

I will cut off all replies now so far as any real or unreal comments go. I find those kind of remarks trivial and boring and do not want to enter into any further discussion. It would be noted for some time I was the only one who responded to these posts so now that will end. There is a limit to the insults and inuendos and it is boring and tedious to keep going over the same old ground. I am rather glad it has come to this as now i don't have to even answer. I do not wish to respond any further to inuendo as to my reality, punch and judy shows or any other such garbage. I have no understanding of what this person is talking about most of the time but have humoured him. This is the last straw however, as the last post is all lies, like many many others posted previously. Isn't it amazing how the truth comes out in the end, it's only a matter of time.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 12, 2009 12:40 AM

Posted by: malsie at February 11, 2009 9:09 PM

Malsie, may I welcome you to old Batman"s village. My apologies for the weather on Saturday for your arrival. But just hang around for about 6 months and the temperature will be 40 degrees lower.

I hope you will find happiness and fulfilment here.
rgds grego

Posted by: grego7 at February 12, 2009 12:33 AM

I think now is the time for the emotion to be put on the back burner and the reality to begin and that is getting people back to living in the own houses with their own 'stuff' again and that takes money, heaps of money. Give as much as you can, keep the pressure up on Governments who make promises, make a noise for these people and keep making a noise. As harsh as it sounds, the time for sympathy now has passed and the time for action has begun. Once the roads are open insurance companies will move in, or the majors will, with caravans where claims officers will process claims and hand out some initial cash. The largest of the majors will try to tie up the most tradesmen in the areas to get rebuilding started quickly, that's part of what you pay for. Keep up the noise for the support and the caring and get things rebuilt and people moved back in so they have a plan they know is home. Apart from the fact they will have somewhere to live it is a diversion from the horror they have faced and it keeps them busy, planning, sorting and picking out replacements for the bricks and mortar they have lost. The major insurance companies have already assessed their payouts and factored into their percentages they need to earn in the coming year to cover it. That's what they do and they are good at it. Whilst it is not going to relieve the terrible tragedy of lost loved ones it is a little diversion in that long road ahead. It's all about money now, any amount at all, just keep it coming, any other stuff is great, needed or not because it shows that someone out there cares. Oh, for a smile, or anything to relieve the pain. Our guys took hairbrushes and combs and shampoo and conditioner. with them. Sounds pathetic I know but you can't believe the impact. We have also organised boxes of hand cream would you believe and moisturiser. It is intimate, it is caring and you have no idea how welcomed it was.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 12, 2009 12:32 AM

Posted by: iaminperth at February 11, 2009 9:58 PM

Perth, I would like to place on record that I do not now have your phone number either mobile or land line.
rgds grego

Posted by: grego7 at February 12, 2009 12:26 AM

I am absolutely appalled to hear that there are people looting in the fire devastated areas. What kind of scum are they? I just can not understand how they can behave in such a way. The Community Centre I work at is organising blood donations with the Red Cross.

Posted by: aquamanda56 at February 11, 2009 11:58 PM

At the risk of agreeing with Marcus again I have to say that he is right when he says there is not much in the way of support out there for men, especially outside the capital cities.

The women's movement has succeded in getting a lot of funding for womens issues (and good luck to them). There are even Misters for Women's Interests. As a rule men don't network like women do as a matter of course. Don't know of any Ministers for Men's Interests.

Many men do tend to suffer in silence and / or work out their own problems rather than seek help. Even if you do look for help there is often none to be had.

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 11, 2009 11:40 PM

malsie @ 10.29pm: Only my father's great-grandparents via NZ and my mother's grandparents, straight to Brisbane. In close families proud of their heritage, the dialect tends to linger. You?

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 11, 2009 11:33 PM

iaminperth at 9:58 PM: That surprises me very much. The female person who claimed to have spoken with you by phone also told my informant that you had given her your first name, which I will of course not repeat here. Off to check my email archive, and then question my usually-reliable sources.

And Perthie, blame RSVP for the emails between bloggers that don't go via their heavily-moderated public domain. When we have stamps expiring, we sometimes use them to get a new penfriend of either gender, rather than to chat up someone. C'est la vie.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 11, 2009 11:27 PM

are you Scottish, TW?? I haven't heard that expression for yonks!!

Posted by: malsie at February 11, 2009 10:29 PM

Colleen, The way these blogs work your post, the way I understood it, was mind boggling. However, I can see where you are coming from and didn't take into account all the behind the scenes stuff that goes on. please accept my apologies for the misunderstanding. I have no excuses it was just the way I read it at the time. The blogs are a little weird at the moment. Apart from so many things being cut there is I think a lot of contact and emails being passed around and then answers being posted which have no relevance to anything so they just make no sense. However, I hope you don't think badly, it was just the way the comment appeared here.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 11, 2009 10:05 PM

I would just like to clear up a misunderstanding here and say that no-one at any time has been on the phone with me. I have never given my phone number to anyone of this blog and don't intend to either. For me a blog is a blog and that is what I do and I enjoy it. I don't talk about people being their backs with other bloggers and I don't keep in touch with any bloggers via email or any other medium. What is being stated here is entirely false. I don't feel the need to prove to anyone that I am 'real' whatever that means as I know who I am and for all my other faults, I am honest and will continue to be in my posts like it or not.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 11, 2009 9:58 PM

Noted, next time will keep comments to myself :))

Posted by: wistfuldeb at February 11, 2009 9:52 PM

well said, Lynath, as always. I arrived here in Melbourne on Saturday and was freaked out from the beginning. My new house was fairly close to a fire up in the Dandenongs area I and spent all Saturday night very scared and not sure what I should be doing. I've learnt heaps in the last few days, and that I need to educate myself far more about what I should/shouldn't be doing for future reference.

I listened avidly to the community radio all weekend and spent much of the time in tears feeling for all those concerned. Sometimes it was so overwhelming I had to turn the radio off and go and do something "normal".

It seems lots of help, support, money and supplies are in abundance to help those concerned at the moment. I want to keep an eye on down the track a little and be ready to jump in then if I can be of any help whatsoever.

It seems like there was an arbitrariness about what happened at the weekend, dependent on which way the wind blew, literally, such that it could have been any of us living in a vulnerable spot that could have been swept away in a way that is terrifying to contemplate.

I have been thinking of you a lot, Jen, and am so pleased to hear you are okay.

Posted by: malsie at February 11, 2009 9:09 PM

TLD at 6.14pm: About 60 of them at once. (#486 > #426)

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 11, 2009 8:44 PM

wistfuldeb at 2:14 PM: Dinna fash yeself.

I have no problems at all with Perthie. I believed for a long time that she was a Svengali puppet, so I used to give her a brotherly stir from time to time. Till I heard that someone I know had been on the phone with her, and she is actually real.

Since then I've left her alone. But she's kept on giving me heaps, so I keep the game going by returning fire when fired upon. Third parties have told me (including recently) that it's good-quality street-theatre that they enjoy, so it's not a waste of time (or deserving moderating).

As to Colleen, I was disappointed by her remark at 7.50pm on the 10th, and said so. Perthie and Kaz agreed with me, so I'm not Robinson Crusoe. But not a big deal either. Must get back to work. Seeyez all.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 11, 2009 8:35 PM

Posted by: wistfuldeb at February 11, 2009 2:14 PM

I will argue vigorously my point of view.....and will vigorously fight for the right of everyone else to express their point of view.

I also never hold grudges.....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 11, 2009 8:28 PM

I have just received a email from my football Club St. Kilda.....

they are having a game to raise funds for the bush fire victims against the bulldogs this Friday

I am so sad I that I can not make it....the least I can do is spread the news.

Go for me please......

this is my 4th post this evening.....wonder how many are posted.....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 11, 2009 8:19 PM

Eccehomoergo-how very poignant. Now its "time for the healing to begin".

Posted by: willow29 at February 11, 2009 8:00 PM

asitis09 at February 11, 12:12 PM: Interested in your post. I always post either in earnest, or with my tongue in my cheek, mainly depending on how playful I'm feeling at the time, and how trivial the topic is.

As to Punch and Judy, were you talking about yourself or Colleen?

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 11, 2009 7:42 PM

Posted by: iaminperth at February 10, 2009 11:08 PM ""

"I think that is the most mind numbing statement I have ever seen on these blogs. Far surpassing Marcus and his droning on or any of the never ending arguments that happen......"

An excerpt from a letter I wrote to a friend in Victoria yesterday morning.

" We in the West are all shocked and horrified by the fires in Victoria. I imagine every Australian feels the same. Whether they were started by arsonists or they are the work of mother nature, it is equally as devastating and cruel to imagine our fellows being burnt alive in their homes. When hell was invented, they imagined the worst that could happen......and it certainly appears that hell descended on parts of Victoria last weekend. Australia weeps, all the way across to the Indian Ocean." Strangely enough Perth I somehow feel complimented to have surpassed Marcus in anything....quite a feat I think..... The point of my post was to draw attention to the culling of post, over moderation and to comment on the loss of robust discussion that I had previously enjoyed on this site. I don't think I have said anything that in anyway could be interpreted to mean that I am in someway impervious to the events happening in Victoria. Colleen

Posted by fifilafume at February 11, 2009 11:14 AM

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 11, 2009 7:28 PM

Yes events over the weekend are disastrous and tragic in loss of human life and fauna and flora and in the unbelievable wiping out of decades of progress in those small but beautiful settlements. "her beauty and her terror" brought well home.
While everyone comes to term with these events in their own way " survivor guilt" can cause poeple to act in ways which may not be beneficial..even if it appears to be respectful. Keeping life going on as normally as possible might be the thing which assists those affected to remain grounded.
Not blogging(or not doing anything else that could be considered frivolous) is not going to help the victims now ,but it may be of great help to others including the surviviors.. It is not just the survivors who need support and normalcy and familiarity, it is also the rescuers and helpers and members of all the services involved. Who knows how many are members here who will be looking for the interaction and familiar entertainment?

We are fortunate to live in a place where response to human disaster is instant. The surviviors are being well cared for and many who are not affected by loss of loved ones will be back on their feet in no time.

In my opinion some of the donations and support should be directed towards the myriad of Emergency Services staff and volunteers who will be bearing a huge burden of trauma as a result of their work.
This is likely to have ongoing impact on our society.

I heard today that the RSPCA is desperate for old blankets, towels ,sheets and buckets to assist with the care of injured animals.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 11, 2009 6:58 PM

Am I imagining it or did more posts go missing?

I think Marcus said that women get lots of support, and men don't, for relationship issues and in general.

Marcus, that has been true in the past, but not anymore.

Men are now being actively encouraged to seek support for whatever areas of their lives require it. The idea of "real men don't complain cry or ask for help" is being gradually changed.

The advent of the Internet has been a wonderful thing as the world is open 24 hors a day for anyone wanting some support informally(which is often the best kind)
A quick search of "online support groups for men" brings up a multitude and quite a number in AU if the search is confined.

As well as online , there is far greater consideration and inclusion of men and their specific needs in the community.
Aged men for instance have male orientated meeting places and activities(dunno if they are allowed strippers though but anything is possible if the consumer wants it! Client focussed care you see)

Just last week I saw a flyer for a "men only" Carer group. They were invited to meet and listen to a speaker and have a talk, then reitre to a local pub for lunch and a drink to chat informally...all expenses paid and on a regular basis.

Things are definetely changing in the area of support for men, and acceptance of the need for it by the community in general.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 11, 2009 6:14 PM

I came across this very sad story about the bushfires.

As the fire drove towards Marysville a family tried to outrun the fire by car along the Acheron Way. The men who found their remains the following day were able to deduce what had happened by the position of the bodies. Apparently the man had got out of the car when it had been stopped by a fallen tree and ran from the car with his daughter in his arms. His wife followed her husband, but had lost a shoe when it became stuck in the molten tar on the road. The man had put down his daughter and was returning to help his wife when the fire front passed over them. He died midway between his wife and daughter. The little girl had a scorched blue ribbon in her hair, with a tin of pocket money clutched in one hand and her father's tobacco in the other.

The pocket money was threepences and that little girl Ruth Kerslake died 10 January 1939. Almost to the day 70 years and 1 month later other little children have died in the same area in exactly the same way.

Technology changes but the harsh reality of our country does not. When we live in the Australian bush we are at its mercy and always will be.

After the 1939 bushfires in which 71 people died there was a Royal Commission. The first 4 paragraphs of that report are almost eery in that they descibe exactly the conditins which existed last Saturday. I guess when one forgets history one is destined to repeat it.

There is an extraordinay section of the ABC web site. Just search Black Friday from the home page.
rgds grego

Posted by: grego7 at February 11, 2009 5:25 PM

Hi everyone,

Just wanted to write and thank everyone who has been concerned about me and tried to make contact. I am deeply touched and overwhelmed by just how many rsvpers and bloggers who have been enquiring about me.

We are fine. And hopefully will remain so.

Fires still in my area of Healesville. It got quite scary on Saturday. The day it was 47c. The massive smoke above and debris falling had all neighbours preparing their properties as best they could. Animals were being taken out, and people going back and forth with trailers full of stuff. You would see trailers with ponies and goats and of course dogs and cats continually coming down the road. My neighbour had all her chooks caged up (9 of them) in her lounge ready just in case.

As I type now, I am listening to ABC radio saying we are still to be on alert. There is lots and lots of smoke everywhere still. And properties in my street, even though several kilometres from actual burning properties, are littered with burnt twigs, leaves and bark that somehow has landed here. I am not the sort to go driving just to sticky beak at the devastation, but from what I have been told the nearest property loss to me is approx 3 to 4 kilometres away. And that home is one of the people I know. Thankfully they are ok though.

My car is still packed and ready to go if necessary.

Internet only back on the air today. And there have been heaps of phone problems, but is hardly an inconvenience when you think about it. As long as the emergency services had access thats all that matters.

The outpouring of care and concern around the country is truly inspiring. I suppose it often takes something like this to remind us the true meaning of care and kindness. Stories that are emerging are heart wrenching and then heart warming in so many ways.

Once again, thankyou everyone who cared enough about me to make enquiries. I am truly grateful.

I, like you, just want an end to it, and that no more loss of life, livestock, or property happens.

Jen xxx

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 11, 2009 5:13 PM

I think that is more important to think about than a blog site.....K Posted by: auntykaz at February 10, 2009 10:07 PM

Kaz, i agree. Now is the time to reflect on those whose lives have been lost, both human and animal, in what must have been absolutely the most horrendous circumstances, to support the determination of those that have survived and the huge battle they face to rebuild some sense of normality, to help those that may still face danger and indeed all those that we love and care about. Life seems so very fragile at this time and those around us need to be reminded of how important and special they really are. Embrace your friends, family and pets and consider how you can make this world a better place. That wildlife refuge seems like a brilliant idea right now Perth. Not that i'm wanting to preach but sometimes you wonder why respect for lives and property isn't the one fundamental principal that is taught throughout our communities by teachers and parents from early childhood to perhaps prevent the terrible, incomprehensible acts of those that have ignited these blazes that have taken advantage of nature's fury. Why don't these people have the insight to seek help for themselves rather than perpetrate such immense cruelty. Society today really does need to answer so many questions about their own conduct. Prevention would have provided much more comfort than the current aid, no matter how heartfelt and needed.

Admittedly i have been impressed by our Premier's reaction to this crisis and welcome the thorough investigation that the royal commission will bring to the debate of living within these fire prone areas. When we cannot rely on others we need to ensure processes are in place to protect ourselves.

Suggestion was made recently that the federal government's latest tax relief bonuses should be made available to the bushfire appeals. Wholeheartedly i agree. Many in country areas across the nation were struggling already.

Perth, Colleen and TW please hug (cyberwise) and wish each other well. We should not be bickering. To any bloggers who have not posted since Saturday, please let us know you are safe :))

Posted by: wistfuldeb at February 11, 2009 2:14 PM

I close my eyes
only for a moment
and the moments gone
all my dreams
pass before my eyes, a curiosity

dust in the wind
all we are dust in the wind

Same old song
just a drop of water
in an endless sea
all we do
crumbles to the ground
though we refuse to see

dust in the wind
(all we are is dust in the wind...)

Now, don't hang on
nothing last forever
but the earth and sky
it slips away
and all your money
won't another minute buy

Dust in the wind
all we are dust in the wind
(all we are is dust in the wind)
dust in the wind
(everything is dust in the wind)

Everything is dust in the wind.

"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust..."
RIP

Posted by: eccehomoergo at February 11, 2009 12:54 PM

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 10, 2009 9:30 PM

I will remember in future that your contributions to the blogs are to you a trifle ....and in future answer your posts with the same measure of importance as you place on them.

Posted by: fifilafume at February 10, 2009 10:39 PM

Perhaps you should reconsider your view of what the blogs actually are. Rarely, it seems to me, do they offer a free, open and honest exchange of ideas. It is more about shoving one's opinion down everyone's throats whilst maintaining a closed mind to the view of others. All the more bizarre considering the number of multiple personalities on here and their views. Interesting to read the opinion of a fictional character don't you think?

Posted by: asitis09 at February 11, 2009 12:12 PM

The floods in FNQ are dreadful but I suppose at least you can say that there was no human hand involved. In Victoria, apparently MORE fires were DELIBERATELY LIT last night. It just defies belief that anyone could be this sick in the head, in the full knowledge that at least 200 people and God knows how many animals have already died. Does anybody here have info, or links to info, on what makes people set fires deliberately? I am utterly repelled but at the same time truly fascinated as to WHY.

Sorry for the "shouting", not like me at all, but it is all so desperately upsetting. I've given some money and wish I could do more - being from the UK, I'm not even allowed to donate blood.

Posted by: missrule at February 11, 2009 12:02 PM

fifilafume at 10:39 PM: Sorry my gentle rebuke upset you to the point of projection. And glad that at least Kaz and Perthie think the same as I do, and have said so.

Back to work, third day running till a bit after midnight the last two. Can't donate it till you earn it, hey?

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 11, 2009 11:02 AM

It�s a great feeling to be able to help.

Starting to get many calls and clients walking in, in relation to help rebuild their dreams.

Of course, I am talking about the great lose of homes experienced in the last few days in the Victorian fires.
We, as a company build country cottages. I love my job of designing these homes, but, the last few days have been full of tragic stories, amazingly brave acts and hope for the future.

All I can do is listen to them, help them cry for their lose and give them some hope.
We have crews ready to build, just waiting for the areas to be safe now. My own experience at the weekend, is somehow helping me to deal with these personal tragedies, better then I thought I could

Posted by: forevernow1 at February 11, 2009 10:41 AM

The news coverage of the aftermath of the weeknds fires is just so sad and soooo painful to see all those people left with nothing. We have an appeal for donations running in our office, for food mainly and we are having a morning tea this week, for cash to donate as well. Every little bit we can give will help someone...also don't forget the organisations helping the animals....just my thoughts...jewels

Posted by: junebaby57 at February 11, 2009 1:36 AM

but everybody had family life and work issues before now.....surely floods and bushfires are not taking up every ones time..

I think that is the most mind numbing statement I have ever seen on these blogs. Far surpassing Marcus and his droning on or any of the never ending arguments that happen..........yes, I think floods and bushfires are taking up everyones time at the moment, there are nearly 200 people dead and more to come, it sort of surpasses talking about porn and bickering on a blog site.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 10, 2009 11:08 PM

Posted by: auntykaz at February 10, 2009 10:07 PM

"Beautiful Victoria burning.......it breaks my heart.

"I hope all bloggers in Victoria are keeping safe.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 8, 2009 3:54 PM"

my sentiments on Sunday after watching half the night the progress of the fires across the state......

the second post on this site after

"Posted by: forevernow1 at February 8, 2009 1:40 PM

I am fortunate in as much as I am able to empathise, and do what I can........ as in contribute financially from my merge savings to help those in need .....and also blog.....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 10, 2009 10:54 PM

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 10, 2009 9:30 PM

I will remember in future that your contributions to the blogs are to you a trifle ....and in future answer your posts with the same measure of importance as you place on them.

Like everyone else, I have spent today writing to my friends in Victoria, relatives in Queensland and down at the local Coles Supermarket donating money to the Bushfire appeal.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 10, 2009 10:39 PM

Just spoke to Jen. She's asked me to let everyone know she is well and not in any danger at this time. She is still packed and ready to go immediately if the situation chages.

She said Saturday night was pretty scary but it's OK now.

Gary

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 10, 2009 10:11 PM

To be honest, the news coverage of the bushfire crisis is something that many feel compelled to view.
These fires are an absolute horror, the vision we are seeing is devastating to our beautiful state of Victoria.
This is a terrible tragedy.
There are also those of us who know people in the affected areas and are concerned for them and their families.
184 people dead so far. I think that is more important to think about than a blog site.....K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 10, 2009 10:07 PM

It is almost surreal to read of the devastation to happen in the eastern states at the moment. One state decimated by fire and the other flooded so badly. I guess with the amount of fire bugs around at the moment and the extreme temperatures it was a disaster waiting to happen, but it almost seems to be preplanned. I hope they lock these people up and throw away the key. The floods are also so catastrophic and have cripped part of another state. Insurance premiums for everyone will soar to new levels never heard of after these payouts which again will impact on all. This is all so sad for everyone involved. My daughter went to see Phanton of the Opera the other night and when the show finished all the cast came out into the audience with huge buckets to collect money for the victims. They signed autographs and had pictures taken and everyone contributed as much as they could. What more can you do but keep trying to pour money in, just to purchase a few necessities to keep them going and to let them know that the rest of Aust. really does care.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 10, 2009 9:59 PM

fifilafume at 7:50 PM: My Brisvegas tennis is rained out so I'm here a couple of hours earlier than usual. But just to have a quick look.

The biggest bushfires that we have in Australia are the nearest we've got to having a war in this very lucky country, and I for one am grieving the loss of lives, life savings and livelihoods - for a start.

And homes and furniture and photos, and all the other memorabilia that remind us who we are, and where we've been.

A young friend of mine (40ish) escaped last year from her burning home with only the nightie she was wearing. I'm searching tonight for my old photos of her and her little son to make her duplicates, so she'll have something to show for her life so far.

Multiply that by the number of survivors from whole burnt-out townsfuls of people.

So I'm not in a mood to blog about life's minutiae this week, Colleen. I hope you'll forgive me and the others for denying you that entertainment, just at the moment.

PS: Yes, the mediation is very obviously unusually one-eyed at present. I have been denigrated as usual most of last week in posts that were let through, but my considerably milder responses in self-defence have all been axed, I'm wondering why I even bother to try to maintain the dialogue. Seeyez all sometime.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 10, 2009 9:30 PM

I think that 'floods and bushfires' would be taking up a lot of peoples time at the moment and also don't forget communication has been cut now to so much of Australia, in Qld, NSW, and of course Victoria. I'm sure that a lot of people are finding far more important things to do with their time at the moment than sit and blog on RSVP

Posted by: iaminperth at February 10, 2009 9:04 PM

Fear Factors - The natural and man made disasters strike back, bush fire, lost lives, floods, recession, job losses, unemployment rate are so high, people's are unable to commit in relationship due to financial crisis, so the blogs is dying.

My sincerely condolence to the people lost thier lives in Victoria's bush fire. I offered prayers to all of you.

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 10, 2009 9:03 PM

hi kaz we have lots of houses under water up here but when the water recedes we will still have our house not so in victoria chad

Posted by: chad1958 at February 10, 2009 8:36 PM

Posted by: asitis09 at February 10, 2009 5:06 PM

If you mean over moderation, can't agree with you more.....

but everybody had family life and work issues before now.....surely floods and bushfires are not taking up every ones time..

Maybe people feel a little annoyed about the culling of the posts....me too.....but staying away is not going to fix the problem...

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 10, 2009 7:50 PM

breakfast

the hen is involved
the pig is committed

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 10, 2009 6:34 PM

Where is everybody?

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 10, 2009 3:31 PM

Possibly, with floods in the top half, bushfires in the bottom half, life, family and work, people have a little more to do than to hang on this blog which has gone nowhere due to ridiculous, inconsistent mediation and the same old merry go round. just my opinion.

Posted by: asitis09 at February 10, 2009 5:06 PM

Where is everybody?

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 10, 2009 3:31 PM

Healesville where Jen lives is under direct threat today. Pray to who or what ever you believe in that she and hers get through this unscathed.

MAD

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 10, 2009 9:59 AM

Yes, for people who are affected by the fire, I hope both you/your family and your home are well and safe. The bush fire is so severe that it is the headline news even in overseas countries. How fortunate we are, being those who are not being affected and safe. Take care, Jen and other bloggers!

Posted by: ahappyending at February 10, 2009 12:44 AM

As well as humans many animals have ben afeected by the fires as well.

DOGS Victoria Bushfire Appeal

If you would like to make a monetary donation toward helping dog owners and their pets who have been affected by the bush fires please use the following methods:

ELECTRONIC FUNDS TRANSFER

Account name: DOGS VICTORIA BUSHFIRE APPEAL

Bank: BENDIGO BANK
BSB: 633-000
ACCOUNT NUMBER: 136225588

SWIFT CODE: BENDAU3B (for overseas donations only)

In the payment memo, please put your name or DOGS Victoria member number.

POST
You can post a cheque or money order to Locked Bag K9, Cranbourne, VIC 3977. Please note on the cheque you would like the money put toward the bushfire appeal.

IN PERSON
Cash or cheques can be delivered in person to the DOGS Victoria office at 655 Western Port Highway, Skye, VIC 3977. The offices are located at KCC Park (State Dog Centre).

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 9, 2009 7:28 PM

Posted by: fifilafume at February 9, 2009 12:40 PM:
Sure.

There are a million things you can fuss over as far as sex is concerned, but the most important thing is just to be present, really.

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 9, 2009 7:13 PM

The news just gets worse today and the newsfilm is heartbreaking......
So many lost lives, destroyed property, devastated communities......

Good news that Jen and Nina are safe, let's hope that this sad time brings people together in the spirit of bonding.......
No rain here today, l don't think any is forecast for the next few days, it is so badly needed.
To think that FNQ is under extensive amounts of water it makes you shake your head doesn't it ??...........K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 9, 2009 5:53 PM

I work for one of the Telco Company's- Optus - and we were just advised the following to help out Bush fire Victims:

"To assist our customers who have lost property as a result of the bushfires, we will be “zero-billing” all their services for up to 3 months effective immediately. Additionally, we will be offering free Mobile Prepaid handsets with Turbo recharge to the value of $1000, to Optus customers who have had either their Fixed or Mobile service disrupted.

Customers should call 1300 300 937 for further assistance." Optus

Could you guys pass this message around to those that need to know the above. I would imagine that other Telco Companies would do something similar for thier customers....thanks jewels

Posted by: junebaby57 at February 9, 2009 4:23 PM

Good to hear that Jen and ninaschen are OK.

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 9, 2009 2:56 PM

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 8, 2009 7:23 PM

"People are probably influenced too much by p0rn these days when it comes to sex issues..."

and if people are influenced by it and take it seriously ....and think it actually bears any resemblance to the real thing.....more fool them is what I say.

p0rn is to sex
what coca cola is to a good single malt whisky..

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 9, 2009 12:40 PM

I was able able to speak with Jen (jenniferhi) this morning and am pleased to say she and her family are OK. Phone and internet are out in her area and she asked me to make this post to tell eveyone she is safe as is her home. Saturday was very scary she said although she appears to have been well prepared.
rgds grego

Posted by: grego7 at February 9, 2009 12:35 PM

note to the powers that be at RSVP
The response thank you for your contact I wish you well in your search is a bit ambiguous situated in the I am interested section.
Often it does just mean thank you for the contact BUT No I'm not really interested .
ANY chance we could have some clearer responses
Cheers Kenny

Posted by: tallerthantom at February 9, 2009 12:33 PM

To all of those affected by the tragic fires our thoughts are with you.

Kenny

Posted by: tallerthantom at February 9, 2009 12:25 PM

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 8, 2009 8:19 PM
where there's 2 wills, there really is a way.
..............................................................

I think that is what I said....didn't I.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 9, 2009 12:12 PM

Just spoke to Jen and all is well with her. Lets just hope we can say the same for the others.

Posted by: tassiedude1 at February 9, 2009 12:09 PM

Greg...

Ninaschen is safe & well, & though I haven't heard news from Jen I'm sure she's ok. Jen? I hope it's just that you can't get to your computer.. please let us know asap..

Here in the Dandenong Ranges we were all nervous.. we're a classic fire danger area (in one area, the fourth most fire vulnerable in the world!) A friend & I sat on my front verandah watching the ugly red-brown sky.. the usual view to the Warburton valley completely obscured by smoke.. & silently prayed for those in the midst of it.
My thoughts were of Ash Wednesday (Cockatoo is only 10minutes from me) & I couldn't help but feel overwhelming anger at those despicable fire-bugs. What are they thinking? That the thrill of a bushfire outweighs the loss of life, homes, businesses, animals...? I guess the question should be "are they capable of thinking at all?"

Rain? ..we had 23 drops last night... not much help...

Posted by: decoratress at February 9, 2009 12:07 PM

Thanks everyone for your concern. I'm in between the Bunyip and Churchill fires but they are not a threat to me but many friends have been touched by the fires. A colleague and her husband were evacuated from the Churchill fire and she consequently suffered a heart attack. She's been airlifted to Melbourne and should be okay. They don't know if their house is gone.

Another's brother-in-law lost his house and practice at Marysville and suffered some burns but will also be okay.

I called a mutual friend of Jen's just now and he spoke with her last night and she is okay. Though her internet is down.

Such a dreadful time. Beyond comprehension.

Posted by: ninaschen at February 9, 2009 11:30 AM

Let's hope that the forecasters are right and there will be rain today in Victoria, drenching rain. Insurance Companies will be sending in teams also to try to get the claims processes going as soon as possible and to give partial cash payments upfront. The thing will be also rebuilding as there are only so many tradesmen to go around. What an awful catastrophic event this has been and will continue to be for a lot of people. Hopefully, things will start turning now for the better. Makes you wish you could go over there to help but then again would only probably get in the way. Teams of police forensics are apparently going from WA as the loss of life is horrendous and identification nearly impossible in some cases. unfortunately all that takes time. I really hope that most if not all were well insured.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 9, 2009 11:04 AM

My partners sister and her husband live at Kinglake. They got out by the skin of their teeth. Almost all of Kinglake is devastated with I think 400+ houses gone plus 29 dead at this stage but I am told it is likely to be a lot more.

Jen is near there. I lost her phone number and emailed her but there has not been an answer. I am quite worried about her.

Ninaschen works near the Gippsland fires but I think she lives away from the fires.

If anyone knows that Jen and Nina are OK can they post. thanks.

Undoubtably, there will be many RSVP people affected by this disaster.
rgds grego

Posted by: grego7 at February 8, 2009 10:21 PM

Kaz and Nina, plus Lesley,Bev, Ann, and John, Iain, Jude...hope you are all safe with all the tragic bushfire damage going on around you all....have a safe Sunday evening ...jewels

Posted by: junebaby57 at February 8, 2009 9:07 PM

Forevernow, glad to hear you are safe. I can sincerely tell you I know what you went through and truly feel for you and for all those affected by the fires. You cant help but cry for the plight of some of the victims and for the miraculous stories of survival.

Has anyone heard from Jen and Ninaschen?

Posted by: willow29 at February 8, 2009 8:36 PM

Rain is forecast for Vic tomorrow and a drop in temperature of about 20 degrees. Let's hope it happens, let's hope they get some relief. the death toll now apparently is 76, how terrible, how shocking this is. I hope that most of the people have made sure their insurance is intact, bit practical I know, but I sincerely hope they did.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 8, 2009 8:33 PM

We have an idiot arsonist here in Perth who keeps setting Kings park alight. I think the police have a grainy type picture of him now so hopefully they will get him pretty soon. the thing is though, nothing seems to happen to these people when they are caught, they just get a fine. Kings Park is huge and there are houses on three sides and then Kings Park Road is the main road to the city and cutting thru West Perth. Both these areas are full of major office buildings so it's a worry as well.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 8, 2009 8:23 PM

fifilafume at 3:53 PM: Sorry, but sexual performance won't go away as a relationship issue, no matter how much you try to shoo it.

And it cuts both ways. For every 2 sad stories decrying blokes who just hop on and get their jollies in a hurry, so that they can start snoring sooner, there's one equally disgruntled bloke who wishes his bedmate hadn't visibly died the very moment before he cranked up the donkey engine.

And that's before we get older and start talking about Brewers' Droop, and the resulting need to get out the tyre pump, or switch on the Jillhammer.

I think it's more useful to talk about sexual motivation, because short of quadriplegia, where there's 2 wills, there really is a way.
..............................................................

I hope all our writers and readers are safe from the fires tonight.

I've had nothing to do with bushfires myself since 1951, when I came home for Christmas from boarding school just turning 16, and spent 15 of the next 17 nights sleeping on the ground beside our property's fire truck - a 2-ton Morris carrying a petrol-engined pump, 2 hoses and six 205-litre drums of creek water.

The stockman drove in extra-low gear along beside the edge of the fire, Dad walked the front hose nozzle out 5 mtrs to the left where the heat was worst, and I was on the second hose 6 mtrs behind him, damping down anything still smouldering.

Luckily we were in grass country, and what the dry-storm lightning started, we could put out in a day or two if the wind wasn't too strong, by which time there was another one to go to.

But I got very tired by dark each night, because I'd only been back at school 3 months, after 4 months in hospital with polio.

Lookit the time - off to tennis, to exercise my polio leg and arm a bit. Use it or lose it, hey?

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 8, 2009 8:19 PM

All essential services will be destroyed in that area Kaz so I don't think anyone will be able to communicate unless it's by mobile. You will probably find the mobile network pretty well clogged as well so let's hope they are safe and their homes are safe also.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 8, 2009 8:12 PM

To all those that have suffered loss in this terrible terrible holocaust in Victoria, I wish to share my most sincere condolences. And to all the 'fireys' and support out there, God Bless you - may safety be on your side.

Posted by: heart2heart57 at February 8, 2009 7:40 PM

It's a shocker Kaz, absolute shocker. They don't know how many people have lost their lives as yet and, of course, there are many children involved. I have been speaking to people in SA this week also and they have been saying that one day it went to 46 there as well. It's all too horrible. We are cool here to the point where I had a blanket on the bed the other night. Can't fathom it at the moment but I too hope everyone anywhere near these fires finds a safe way out.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 8, 2009 7:33 PM

Posted by: fifilafume at February 8, 2009 3:53 PM:
Sounds reasonable. People are probably influenced too much by p0rn these days when it comes to sex issues...

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 8, 2009 7:23 PM

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 8, 2009 11:58 AM
Posted by: auntykaz at February 8, 2009 10:36 AM

Thanks. Yeah, did a rewrite. Never know your luck, I guess... :)

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 8, 2009 5:13 PM

Jeezus, Perth, l wrote that before l opened the paper.... Had not looked at the tv all weekend and Victoria is going through some terrible bushfires with many deaths. 35 as of 3 pm today, with more expected.....
Some of our blogger friends are very near the areas of concern, Jen, Ninaschen, hope that all is well with you and anyone else that may read these blogs. So distressing to see the reports on the tv and the radio, 3AW are broadcasting continually at the moment. Lets all think of what is happening here, it is dreadful....................K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 8, 2009 4:32 PM

Beautiful Victoria burning.......it breaks my heart.

I hope all bloggers in Victoria are keeping safe.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 8, 2009 3:54 PM

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 5, 2009 9:34 PM

second attempt at this post:

"sexual performance" a euphemism for impotency issues? If not, I've never known any guy to fret about how good he is in bed... but then, I guess, as a guy, I probably wouldn't hear about it. :)

I think the words "sexual"and "performance" should never been seen together.

Sex should never be a performance. It should just be what comes (no pun intended) naturally.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 8, 2009 3:53 PM

To everyone that has been touched by the horrific events in Victoria in the last twenty four hours, my heart goes out to you all – stay safe.

My son and I sat through last night with fires raging one kilometer on both sides of us between 6.00pm and 10.30pm last night. We were blocked in, with no power and no news, other then the numerous mobile calls checking on our safety.

There was no way out of our estate.

The sound of fire engines is still ringing in my ears this morning. The fire crews did a wonderful job and only 3 houses were lost in this instance, unlike the horrific stories we are hearing this morning.

Fifteen crews attended this fire that could have been so much worse, as we live in suburbia.
I would like to add my sincerest gratitude to all those who risk their lives to save our own, you truly are amazing. This story is nowhere near the stories coming to light today, but it is my story.

Posted by: forevernow1 at February 8, 2009 1:40 PM

I have to have financial stability it's just part of who I am. I have my little plan going on and always have plan B. It's not something I think about on a day to day basis but I need to know that whatever happens with the world and myself and family we are safe and secure. I also like to plan for trips away and costly things like that without changing our standard of living radically as it is. I don't think it is a good or a bad thing it's just part of who I am.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 8, 2009 1:03 PM

Hi meanduandadognamedblue, you look spectacular, good for you and hope you meet someone really nice soon, you deserve it.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 8, 2009 12:52 PM

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 7, 2009 9:33 PM

You are so right. I know that financial stability (his) had an effect on the failure of my last relatinship. All in his mind....not mine....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 8, 2009 12:04 PM

Perthie: Hope it didn't rain on your barbie, and that everything went down well, especially the pressies.

Youandjane: The new profile also rocks, and the photos are a lot better. A really good piece of bait. Best of luck with it.

Pub lunch today, arvo movie then tennis tonight - seeyez all much later.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 8, 2009 11:58 AM

Love Lost To Love AGAIN.....It's All About SURVIVAL.

S - Spirit

U - Undaunted

R - Reality

V - Vow

I - Inner Strength

V - Victory

A - Affirmation

L - Love

This are the importance of Survival Key Notes...Be Free and Not Restricted.

Salute...

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 8, 2009 11:14 AM

Magic Kaz! I am so pleased. We are having horrendous reports here or the heatwave hitting everyone and I talk to people in the Eastern States every day in my job. Sounds dreadful at times. Thanks for your advice re foot. I bought the gizmo and it is working wonders, still horribly sore but I am getting around so much better and it's not swelling anything like it was. Also bought one for my left wrist as I landed on that side and that has been very sore as well and swelling. I'm getting there, slowly but surely so I'm happy. Thanks so much, advice gratefully received.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 8, 2009 10:57 AM

I agree Marcus, I think the 'older warm and fuzzies' is a far better feeling than the urgency in the younger days. I like meeting new people, any people and the feelings generated by those meetings are all completelely different and separate. I think in the younger days people miss out a lot because they only hone in on the subject of their desire and become a little one dimensional and also sometimes a little obsessive. I went out last night and met quite a few new people, as well as family and old friends and have separate feelings, all good for all of them. It's a good feeling and there is no urgency and need, but have to admit, it would be nice if one of the people gave me a call one day, lol. It's a beautiful cool day here today, light breeze, the sun is out. I hope you guys are all alright in the eastern states.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 8, 2009 10:51 AM

Ha, meandjane, love the new pic and the new name......and has the profile had a tweak or two as well ??. Looks great.

Perth l am happy to report that it is raining as l type, bucketing actually, and oh so cool...... Don't think it will last long, but l sit here, listening to Paul Kelly going full bore on the sound system and can still hear it pounding on the roof of the house........beautiful........K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 8, 2009 10:36 AM

When two creatures are alike, the biggest challenges is Intimidation and Lack of Confident. Men are more prone to this version when it comes to financial stability's. " Ego" is the mean thing....
Why What Is That?

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 7, 2009 9:33 PM

Hi Maryda, posted Feb 5 at 1:44 pm

Probably lack of communication?!. I think he needs time and space to figured it out. It's not lost of love at all. A girlfriend of mine putting back up her profile, ( I don't know what does she's thinking but I guess there is a good purposes in her mind) while him still hidden. what does it mean? does still hoping her to reconcile with him ?

Take your time, it's quite bit early to justify. Life is full of unexpected mysterious events.

If you feel the need to chance your situation, do it sooner rather than later.
The Universe is patient BUT what begins with a whisper of destiny's calling will end up being an ear-splitting roar, if you ignore it.

Ignoring the call can only result in one thing - you'll end up having to make the change anyway...but the time you do..it will be a giant headache !...

If I am in that cases, I won't put myself in that position. Sometimes we're running out of patient to find it out as quickly as soon as possible.
Dig deeper, the hidden treasures buried behind the surface of "rocks''. Nothing would comes easily if you're looking for good quality.!

Posted by: birdsofparadise at February 7, 2009 9:15 PM

Homoergaster at February 6, 2009 1:51 PM
That is pretty much what happens in neurophysiological terms. As we get older and more experienced we can depend on rationality to weigh the liklihood of a succesful relationship- or just a liason providing our limbic system has had sufficient 'nutrition'.
The crazy, literal sickness, of 'love' can be replaced by an altogether more sensible way forward...
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 7, 2009 6:38 PM

Beautiful blustery day in downtown Perth today, not too hot, but a little cool overnight. I feel so sorry for anyone suffering with the heat in the Eastern States, I hope it all returns to normal soon.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 7, 2009 5:38 PM

Wow, long day today. My eldest partner is having a birthday party tonight and I am so looking forward to it. As we have eaten so much seafood for the past month or so he specifically said none tonight !!! Daughter has ordered great big steaks and also fillet steaks, lots of onions and all the blokey things that guys like. I think there are only about 20 people going but it should be a lot of fun. Took Marcus suggestion about buying a present for him to keep and also have the great cookbook as well so he should be happy. Although, he is such a nice person and he is going to get such a kick out of the whole thing and having 'the food' and then he will be back on the good stuff for the rest of the year. We are all going to Bali in April so I have to be fit and walking, or rather hobbling well by then, it should be so much fun. I think it is work now with the foot and getting it going again. The doctor said to keep it moving as much as possible without going overboard and now it's just time and working thru it a bit. I can do that !!!!

Posted by: iaminperth at February 7, 2009 5:32 PM

maryda...I have a few questions about your lost love...you say here that you are 55 but on your profile you are a 53 yr old divorcee...which is it? Is your ex-husband your lost love, or is it a more recent lover?
Your question about communication is interesting too...if you are thinking that I would say that it could definitely be at the core of your problems...it seems to be in most relationships...but the devil to overcome.

Posted by: istj54 at February 7, 2009 3:57 PM

Posted by: fifilafume at February 6, 2009 6:29 PM:
The new shot probably has less resolution as a result of being cropped from a full-body shot. And the lighting is better.

Nothing worth bottling, unfortunately.

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 7, 2009 3:46 PM

eccehomoergo:

Mate' I think you slipped me the wrong pill last night. Lol...................

We had a little rain here this morning but it looks like it's going to clear to a nice afternoon..........

Posted by: tassiedude1 at February 7, 2009 3:21 PM

Heard on the news today that the only jobs safe are, government, medical and teaching.

You would imagine that 2 out of 3 would be enough to keep your job safe.

Apparently not...

so that is why I lost my love of Kevin......will I love him again,

not until he gives me back my government/medical job.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 7, 2009 2:24 PM

Posted by: fifilafume at February 6, 2009 10:34 PM

Maybe, they are the same age!

Posted by: wistfuldeb at February 7, 2009 2:03 AM

chad1958 at 6:27 PM: Hi mate. How's the weather up there? Floods near you?

I was thinking of having a photo of me just before and then another straight after I'd lost the 15kg in 16 weeks in 2003, without being hungry once, but I wanted readers to be thinking about themselves, not me. Hey, I'm only the key to their own personal triumphs.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 7, 2009 1:13 AM

iaminperth at 5:45 PM: You know, asitis09 is a newbie, but I think he was dead right at 5:28 PM,

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 7, 2009 1:04 AM

Posted by: amberlight58 at February 6, 2009 9:55 PM

I think Marcus has the "hots" for you. So much passion.......

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 6, 2009 10:34 PM

Posted by: asitis09 at February 6, 2009 5:28 PM

Welcome and please keep writing.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 6, 2009 9:40 PM

Hmmm....well, there is no man-drought, meandjane, (how are we going to cope with this name? couldn't you go back to drone?)
- you just need to go to the ABS site to check that out. In fact there's a man-glut for women aged 20-25 due toAussie women choosing men 4-5 years older than them. The 20-25 year old men thus are waiting for the 15-20 year old women to get
5 years older and then choose them.

So women 20-25 do have lots of choice and a lot do "settle " then - my daughter did. She's interested in kids, and her genertaion has seen what has happened to the one 10-15 years older, many of whom left motherhood very late or even too late.

I find women of any age find someone pretty quickly on this site, actually. I don't know why, We have discussed this before...there may be fewer women on the site than guys.
I hope your 12 stamps bear beautiful fruit.

Asitis, hang around for a while and you may change your mind....see what you think after a few more months.Tone is a very difficult thing to convey on the blogs. Perth is a straight talker and possibly has difficulty conveying subtlety in writing, much like myself, but I'm a vision of sweetness and light in person....you wouldn't recognise me.

Posted by: waterbomber at February 6, 2009 8:46 PM

I'm going to another birthday party tomorrow night and really looking forward to it. I have bought a couple of, what I think, really good presents and I hope the birthday boy likes them. I think he will. I have one more party to go to this month, and that isnt until the end of April. The April one we are having here at home and that should be great fun. Our parties have to slow down and quieten down fairly early but there is always someone in the group who can play piano so usually we all end up inside. This one will be all late teens and early twenties and they know the score, most having wandered in and out for years. It's really good fun and I get to see them all achieving and living their lives and there is some amazing music to be heard. The last one ended at about 3.30a.m. and there were a few bodies laying about in the morning. I love seeing these kids as I have known some since pre primary and now they are late teens and early twenties. I can't believe how talented they are, and how philosophical they are with life. A few have had challenges but they are magnificent, truly spectacular.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 6, 2009 8:27 PM

I had two of the best pieces of salmon for dinner tonight, cooked them on the barbecue and wilted some bok choy and made a dressing with lemon juice, extra virgin, wholegrain mustard and touch of white wine. Yum, it was delicious. Limited myself to one glass of champers, small one at that and had quite a large meal. Walked for 30 minutes at lunchtime, albeit a struggle but got there and feeling pretty good at the moment. Just have to resist the temptation not to raid the fridge later on or sneak another glass of wine. Thanks to everybody who suggested the foot gizmo, I actually purchased two. Taken the first steps, now will keep going. I don't like the extra flub, it's uncomfortable.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 6, 2009 8:13 PM

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 5, 2009 9:37 PM

I want to know what you are eating, drinking, smoking, ........you look younger in 09 than you did in 08.....let's bottle it and make a buck or two.

and by the way I have been reduced to small talk, as my serious stuff goes missing......

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 6, 2009 6:29 PM

TW the book you supposedly wrote about diet and weight loss? i hope you didnt put a pic on the inside cover with the authors note ; now that would be bad pr

Posted by: chad1958 at February 6, 2009 6:27 PM

It's a sad, sad man who is immune to love.

Posted by: waterbomber at February 6, 2009 6:03 PM

I had a broken foot and now it is out of a cast and I strap it and walk. There is no reason but a load of fat excuses not to get up off your butt. Try a pool and do some water aerobics !!! As for 'pig ignorant' it is calories in, vs calories out and it is as easy as that and if your book works so well why are you so grossly overweight or rather obese. It is eat and exercise, the more you eat the more you need to exercise. I still eat quite a bit but I eat very differently and I have to exercise more. It is that simple, the hard bit is trying not to succumb to temptation. Maybe if you put your book on the floor and used it as a step to do some exercise that would be the only way it would help anyone.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 6, 2009 5:45 PM

Great name,meandjaneinaplane. Very catchy and quirky too. How are you going fishing in that pool of 30-something young things? A guy at work is your age, not on RSVP, but reports the same problems...the women are not thinking seriously about settling down yet. He hasn't met anyone 'permanent' and really wants to. He has got everything going for him that I can see (and no, people, he is young enough to be my son). It seems to be a common problem for guys and its such a shame.

Posted by: waterbomber at February 6, 2009 2:58 PM

Perhaps 'love' is some sort of contagious virus ?

Do we need to catch it, go fully blown, and survive, in order to build up our immunity to it? (perhaps with the help of a few 'boosters' here and there ...)

The red, or the blue pill... Rod?

"What doesn't kill you, only makes you stranger... " ~ The Joker

Posted by: eccehomoergo at February 6, 2009 1:51 PM

what a very hard lesson to have to learn - to Posted by: maryda at February 5, 2009 1:44 PM

maryda as with any loss there is a grieving process to work through. Even though you want it to speed up and be finished with it takes time and pain.

You might consider looking for a web community specifically for people or women in the same boat. It can be very comforting to be able to talk or post to someone at all hours of the day or night. Talking(or posting) about what has happened until you are able to work through every detail, and come to terms with the situation is the most beneficial and healing thing. People in your daily life soon get tired of listening and many won't understand how you feel, so a web group can help you to retain your sanity when you think you have lost it!

Time, as suggested already by others, is what it takes, and after awhile some 'work' will be required to create the new you. You will surprise yourself and although you can't imagine it now, you can and will be happy again.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 5, 2009 9:49 PM

Posted by: wistfuldeb at February 5, 2009 3:34 PM:

Sorry, I read your post more carefully (silly me), and it is all clear to me now.

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 5, 2009 9:37 PM

Posted by: wistfuldeb at February 5, 2009 3:34 PM:
"I think attractiveness to women, actual or perceived, is as central to their self esteem as sexual performance is to men."

Is "sexual performance" a euphemism for impotency issues? If not, I've never known any guy to fret about how good he is in bed... but then, I guess, as a guy, I probably wouldn't hear about it. :)

Posted by: meandjaneinaplane at February 5, 2009 9:34 PM

tassiedude1 at 6:15 PM: Don't they already do most of that in England?

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 5, 2009 9:24 PM

Maryda, I too am sorry for your loss. One month isn't very long and you are very brave to be looking again so soon. Im sure you've given careful consideration to looking while your heart hasnt healed. And anyway, it is always nice to look and see what your options are. Good luck.

Posted by: willow29 at February 5, 2009 8:49 PM

That "doggerel" was not mine...just from an email doing the rounds

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 5, 2009 5:30 PM

Maryda, time is, as usual, a great healer.
Probably the best thing really, you need to settle within yourself and give yourself the space to find and become you.
Not easy to do but ultimately the way forward...............K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 5, 2009 5:24 PM

maryda:

I am very, very sorry to hear about your loss. Unfortunately the is nothing I nor anyone else can say that will assist you through this time.

I do know life is a journey and no matter how much you plan ahead things will never go along as you have foreseen. Things that you didn't think of were probably set in motion years ago so trying to accept or relinquish blame is a fruitless exercise.

I also know that things will get a lot worse before they get better so you had better hang on. Whatever you do, don't turn out the light for every down has an up. You just cant see it yet.

There is no scientific answer, believe me I have searched for it, I am starting to believe that we, just like everything else, are just floating around in the universe waiting to crash into something bigger.

And if anyone tells you, "there are plenty of fish in the sea", just kick them in the nuts cause that is about the dumbest thing anyone could ever say.

Good luck on your journey Maryda.

Posted by: tassiedude1 at February 5, 2009 5:05 PM

"We are taught from a young age to think about the impact that our behaviour has on others and to modify our behaviour accordingly." Posted by: amberlight58 at February 5, 2009 12:57 AM

Amber your posts are like an extension of my thought processes and i'm not entirely sure how you manage that, lol. I think attractiveness to women, actual or perceived, is as central to their self esteem as sexual performance is to men. Believing the media, 63% of women don't reach orgasm during intercourse probably because 63% of men don't know what the hell their doing!

More often than not men or women will be complimented on their attributes. That is what makes you feel special but seriously when would you say to your partner, maintaining the same position is really rather dull or have you got any idea about female anatomy or how to arouse?

No, you don't. Maybe you will get your message across by other means but to blatantly tell them that is why they are not partner material, i don't think so. Losing love is cruel enough, without adding to their woes. Anyone with a tenuous hold on their self esteem would be mortified.

Fragility comes in many shapes and sizes. Those whom criticise and damage with misplaced words should remember that.

Posted by: wistfuldeb at February 5, 2009 3:34 PM

what a very hard lesson to have to learn - to lose the love of your loved one - my very first time at the age of 55. It might make me stronger in the long run, but given it's only been 1 month and still not getting any easier, how does one get to the point of acceptance and realisation that the one you have loved no longer loves you. Would acceptance make this sad sad feeling any better?? Lost in many ways at the moment and feeling what a waste, maybe it was all over through lack of communication?? what a sad time for anyone experiencing the loss of love

Posted by: maryda at February 5, 2009 1:44 PM

Lynath..

Great dog breed evaluation, hahaha! Love it!

I'll just add..

English Bull Terrier: Is a 'light bulb' edible? ..are you SURE?

Deco

Posted by: decoratress at February 5, 2009 1:27 PM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 3, 2009 11:32 PM

Great post Lynath. I wonder what one of those little fluffy dogs with attitude (like mine) would say?
Maybe "don't tell me what to do!"

Posted by: amberlight58 at February 5, 2009 1:11 AM

Lynath, loved the poem and it is so true of the German Shepherd !!! I can do it, but I just have to make sure you are all herded up and safe before I leave my post to complete the task.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 4, 2009 9:57 AM

Ok I am going to have a little rant here and actually relate it back to the blog topic!
firstly, I'm not going to comment directly on current discussion, apart from that it's tragedy that should have been avoided.
I am going to talk about theories, be they ethological, economical, pschological, scientific or any other thing. In most cases for a theory to prove true, there are a set of criteria to be met. In most cases it is unlikely that all criteria can be met all the time, therefore there is variation and outcomes that do not pan out the theory. Theories are used to set a base line for likely outcomes for certain circumstances. In relation to the ethological theories put forward here, they are based on ideal/optimum situations, as most of the audience here is outside the subject criteria, it renders those theories irrelevant to the audience. It does give a base starting line for insight into behaviour but as with estimating outcomes of any scenario all variations then need factoring in... what you finish up with is vastly different from what you started with. A quote relating to instinct "The learning process has therefore great importance, as the ability to change the individual's responses based on its experience. It can be said that the more the brain is complex and the life of the individual long, the more its behaviour will be "intelligent" (in the sense of guided by experience rather than rigid Fixed Action Patterns)."

Another example maybe seen in financial situations. Anyone who has ever had to developed budgets knows that you start with what was expended in a previous period, adjust it by known changes and probable cpi increases. Your outcome will be different each time depending on prevailing cirtcumstances.

Think of computing logic... If, then, goto.... the different answers will determine the progress of a program... yeah thats simplistic, but you get my drift.

And so, to the topic of Love lost to Love again - to know love we have to have loved and to have lost - However, I don't think that consequent experiences of love will ever be the same as ones 'first love'. How can it be? The next time you fall "in love" all the basic criteria will be different...you will be older, have more life experience, have changed expectations, maybe even changed looks, motivations,ambitions, job, financial situation etc etc.

Hey and by the time you are 40-50+, there are a whole lot more influences, of course it will be different. Even if you are one of those people who are very open to love and have a tendancy to fall easily...incurable romantic...you can't help but be a little different each time. I say, accept that each experience is going to be different and give up trying to direct progress according to your "theory" of how your romance should evolve... just let it go and let it happen, the influences have already been put in place.

I think that makes sense...or I'm just stating the obvious...my 2 bobs worth.

Posted by: aquamanda56 at February 3, 2009 11:56 PM

How many dogs does it take to change a lightbulb?

1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?

2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

4. Rottweiler: Make me.

5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.

6. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!

7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.

9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb!

10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

11. Chihuahua : Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Or 'We don't need no stinking light bulb.'

12. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?

13. Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

14. Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

Cats do not change light bulbs
Dogs have masters, caats have staff.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 3, 2009 11:32 PM

Thanks Kaz and everyone for the help with my foot. I really need a couple of anti inflamms now and then but I am asleep within 10 minutes. Even a couple of panadol and I am asleep within 20 minutes. It's funny because I am not a sleeper except for late at night and then I am out like a light for about 4 hours. Wake up like turning on a lightbulb and usually up and away. Have the gizmo on now and I am going to walk. I have some weight to lose also and not too happy about it but on my butt for over two months now over christmas and new year has taken its toll, too much food and too much wine. Never mind, I'm very positive and I know i will lose it fairly quickly. I cut out everything processed, absolutely everything and just eat fresh and cut down radically on the wine, now that's the hard bit.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 3, 2009 10:21 PM

I knew you were joking Rod but I do take your comment to keep working the foot. When I tripped my foot become caught and therefore the bones on the top of my foot were broken and there was extension tendon damage. It is out of the cast and moon boot now and I am trying to get back to walking on it. Kaz said to get one of those bandage things and I have thanks Kaz an although it feels a bit tight at the moment it's quite comfortable. This might work enough for me to walk as at the moment I cant do any exercise at all. i work full time and next week have a fair bit of driving to do and then it really aches, this will help with the driving also I think. I'm a hopeless cripple, I really am, just keep pushing the boundaries and don't like to sit still.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 3, 2009 8:59 PM

Nobody knows the reasons as yet and I think it would be best left unsaid and there are many many considerations. Statements are really not appropriate at this time, I agree with Kaz.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 3, 2009 8:55 PM

Colleen ~ "John Martyn, 1948 - 2009 may he RIP." How can someone RIP if there is no-where to rest in? Just curious.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 3, 2009 5:46 PM

Good Morning to the west,
Good Afternoon to the rest.....

I'm trying very hard to understand how the governments attempted package to rescue 90,000 jobs, a week after sacking all casual and contract workers at medicare australia.

Colleen

C

Posted by: fifilafume at February 3, 2009 12:58 PM

Perth,
A Friend of mine broke her ankle in similar circumstances to yours. She required plating and screws, though.
Her foot kept swelling up for weeks after it was supposed to be healed.
Her Orthopod told her it can take up to six months or more for this to stop after a bad fracture ?due to the tissue damage.
She is an RN and is on her feet all the time at work. It is 12 months since it happened and she still gets swelling occasionally though it is not as bad.
Very frustrating for all concerned and all they can suggest is elevate the leg whenever you are sitting down.

Posted by: amberlight58 at February 3, 2009 12:13 PM

Morning all,

I am listening to the beautiful dulcid tones of John Martyn, 1948 - 2009 may he RIP.

And to everyone who gave me advice on signing into these blogs, thanks, I have taken all advice on board and things are working a lot better for me.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 3, 2009 10:56 AM

Hey, where is H2H and OBD these days? Just finished an assessment piece and have energy to spare. Oops that probably doesn't sound right, lol. Maybe HJ (just as special treat) tonight. Actually the heat in Melb was great for my waistline. Lost kilos :)) For anyone waiting on emails, i'm getting there. Now off to mail my assessment in the dead of night, well makes the lack of sleep seem more exciting :))

Posted by: wistfuldeb at February 3, 2009 2:16 AM

No good with tablets at all Kaz, I just fall asleep. Anaesthetic is a bit of a nightmare, don't respond well at all. Oh well, we all have strange things about us. Are the tubigrips like tight bandages you put on like socks. That is a good idea, and it might hadn't thought of that. I'm really fed up walking like a flat footed duck and my dog thinks I am ridiculous !

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 10:32 PM

FB, hear hear. At last a sensible voice of the male variety has the decency to speak up.

You call it sad.....l call it bad form, something that Marcus excels at.............K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 2, 2009 10:31 PM

I rate intelligence, humour and strength and, of course, honestly above all qualities in an individual. In a man for me it is an essential requirement for me to have any ongoing interest. I am not of an age where I am going to have more children, not am I needy or dependent. I also like an individual who has some interests of his own and likewise I have some of mine. We would have to have shared interests as well and enormous respect for each others opinions. I also love to learn from people so I don't need someone gooey. I like energy and style and someone sitting around bleating about the past or getting gooey silly because it's valentines day gives me the creeps.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 10:10 PM

Geez, perth, anti inflammatory medication shouldn't make you drowsy.....
Have you tried something called tubigrips, you buy them from a pharmacy and they aid in reducing swelling to limbs. I found them quite effective when my left knee caused some difficulty last year. Elevate the foot as well, whenever you can.Good luck !!.................K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 2, 2009 10:10 PM

Jen, I deleted my waterbombe profile a while ago, but somehow the system still recognises the name when I post. Weird. Anyway, recently I thought I would create a new profile, because people can't see who waterbombe is, but I can't have waterbombe as a name...because the RSVP system still recognises it, even though it doesn't exist anymore. I said it was weird! (But I think it has something to do with cookies). So I went for the next closest name, waterbomber.

Posted by: waterbomber at February 2, 2009 9:52 PM

Posted by: auntykaz at February 2, 2009 5:05 PM:

Nah, it wasn't the "big woop" thing...

I was kind of surprised at Marcus, who runs a fairly hard line (so it seems) that you should be follow the dictates of reason and science in all things, then running quite the opposite direction here.

Some guy has just killed his daughter in an appalling way, and because "someone he knows and respects", on the basis of no evidence at all, suggests it was probably because he found out the child was not his, something horrible can then be turned into an opportunity to get onto one of his hobby-horses about women who have kids by other men, and don't tell the primary care-giver...

In my opinion, that was the saddest thing I have ever seen during my time here.

Posted by: featherlessbiped at February 2, 2009 9:38 PM

i didn't know there was a link, I'll have a look for it next time, thanks WB. Will try the crystals thing also. It's sort of like a catch 22 at the moment. I need to walk more and do things, but can't because of this severe swelling. I have tried to walk thru it but then the rest of my foot becomes very sore and tender. This is a real bummer, don't like the limpy thing at all and not good being restricted.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 9:33 PM

We had a garden full of teenagers here yesterday having a barbecue and a few drinks prior to going to
The Big Day Out at the Claremont Showgrounds. They turn up in the morning and cook a great big lunch for themselves, have a swim and a drink and then amble down to the showgrounds. They leave their cars so its all about having a good time and safety. We don't know who it was, but one mother drove her 17 year old daughter and an hour later this little girl was dead. Apparently she had taken an ectasy tablet prior to leaving home and then when she found the huge police presence there she swallowed four more. When will they learn. 'our teens' ambled back later between 9.30 and 11p.m. had another swim, and all drove safely home. I feel so badly for this mum who drove her daughter to The Big Day Out, she must be so devastated.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 9:24 PM

A man on his Harley was riding along a Victorian beach road when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, 'Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish..'

The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to Tasmania so I can ride over anytime I want.'

The Lord said, 'Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the
supports required reaching the bottom of the Straight and the concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help
mankind.'

The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, 'Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand women; I want to know how she feels inside, what she's
thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, why she
snaps and complains when I try to help, and how I can make a woman truly happy.'

The Lord replied, 'You want two lanes or four on that bridge? --

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 2, 2009 9:21 PM

I think it is so sad that people don't look into the background of dogs Marcus and see what they were actually bred for in the first place. Why should a little dog that was bred to hunt and work be forced to endure hours of grooming and then expected to sit around like an ornament. No wonder they bark all day and some behave very badly. They need a job, they need to work and they need to be respected for who they are. I think humankind should also be very careful with their choice of mate and not chose on the basis of entirely looks. We are all different, some like to relax working and some like to relax sitting around, if either thing is going to grate on the other, it is not going to work long term, no matter how nice looking the package is.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 9:14 PM

Posted by: waterbomber at February 2, 2009 7:53 PM

They had a little biddy teasers...you could see which blogs had new posts....now who would know unless your visit them all Today I did have the time to catch up and and it appears that no one is doing much posting, except on this one.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 2, 2009 9:12 PM

waterbombe/waterbomber? What's that about?

Willow ~ Yes I agree it is often safer at School Willow. I know a lot of parents come and pick their kids up when it gets too hot but often home could be just as bad. Actually their Principal used to always buy icy-poles for the whole School population if the temp hit the old 100F. Pretty generous since that entailed neally 400 kids.

Fire got to within about 4 klms of the School once (2 klms from our home at the time). That was truly scary. We were blocked off from getting home to our pets and belongings. But thankfully all was ok.

Have been touched by fire here though, and thankfully it was not as bad as it could have been because of our wonderful CFA volunteers and of course the Insurance company.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 2, 2009 9:11 PM

Yes exactly, artizanne. I think auntykaz is trying to change the subject before Marcus weighs in with even more of his dark side. I agree Colleen, the link on the home page to the blogs was where I originally noticed them a year or so ago. I would never have found them at the bottom of the page where they are now.

Posted by: waterbomber at February 2, 2009 7:53 PM

Ha ha ha, I've heard it all now, that is so funny, so incredibly funny. He just doesn't get it does he !

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 7:47 PM

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 11:27 AM

Yup! It's romance all the way until they get what they want. Then it's kick back, with the feet up, remote in one hand beer in the other, flicking between the cricket and the tennis.

"Babe zip down the bottleo and grab us another six pack would ya"......

Just ignore the pain and get on with things. It'll heel faster and stronger that way. Just don't go doing the two hundred meter hurdles. :)

What?....... That's exactly what you guys do anyway!

Oh and I recommend any professional advice given by me should be totally ignored :).

xxx

Posted by: tassiedude1 at February 2, 2009 6:33 PM

Posted by: waterbombe at February 2, 2009 11:41 AM

Thanks for your comments and if you can't find the book, don't worry I will give you mine.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 2, 2009 5:42 PM

Re the foot, it is so annoying, I was hoping that all would be well by now but it keeps swelling up and is very painful. No good at taking anti inflammies as I fall asleep within 10 minutes so something needs to be done I suppose.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 5:27 PM

That is so funny Lynath - I will join in, in the future too.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 5:25 PM

Lynath, gobsmacked !! Surely not !!.......
Come on, girl, rally and give it your best shot.......

FB, sometimes l can't be bothered with drawn out words, and l actually like the term "big woop".....sorta denotes my disdain, if you get my drift.......K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 2, 2009 5:05 PM

I cannot even pretend to understand the extreme malice involved in using your own flesh and blood as a weapon.I agree that there should be a sentence which reflects on that premeditated heinous act on innocent children.

Posted by: artizanne at February 2, 2009 4:50 PM

iaminperth you should see a physio and or a doctor ifor a re-check of your foot.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 2, 2009 4:43 PM

Timewarp, one thing that people never stop talking about is the weather. Too hot, too cold, too wet, too dry,too windy, etc etc....

Me, l prefer Autumn and Winter, the lovely mild Autumn days are beautiful, pleasant and mild. Winter, well you can always pop on a jumper, a pair of nice woolly socks, get a good hot cup of tea and find a nice cosy spot.
Summer is not quite so easy to cope with. I hate the clammy, sweaty, heat we have here in Melbourne. Sure it doesn't happen all the time, but it aint me.
I think l was a penguin in a former life actually...............K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 2, 2009 4:29 PM

Coventry for me was proposed, by TLD at 5.40pm last night. Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 11:50 AM
I don't think so Timewarp. I would never suggest that line of "blog freezeout bullying", for anyone, although it has been suggested for me at least once.
If you read my post which was defending you against someone's misinterpretation of your words , and connected it with the one below by iaminperth from a day or so earlier, you will see both my comment and intention was friendly. The punctuation was incorrect..should have been "See! Who says we ignore Timewap?"
"but TW drones on and on about the same sort of thing and everyone ignores it."
Posted by: iaminperth at January 30, 2009 1:02 AM

Taking the time to read your posts and bother to reply to defend you in your absence is not freezing you out I would have thought. btw I am not connected with any ofline blog social group. It is not a conspiracy.
I am completely GOBSMACKED!

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 2, 2009 4:26 PM

Posted by: waterbombe at February 2, 2009 10:33 AM

The further example of this tragedy is it demonstrates, again, that the law, in matters of this type is only effective with the honest and law abiding. Should throw him off the bridge......I'll help.

Posted by: asitis09 at February 2, 2009 3:19 PM

Asperger’s not! Verbal Diarrhoea is the more prevalent complaint on here!

Posted by: stockroute99 at February 2, 2009 2:07 PM

iaminperth at February 1, 2009 5:42 PM . You poor thing. I ruptured the ligaments in my ankle many years ago and had to have a reconstruction and a revision some years later. I don't have much trouble with it now but when it did swell up I used to put some washing soda crystals in a stocking, wrap it around the ankle, wrap the whole thing in a thick towel and sleep with it on. In the morning the washing soda had absorbed most of the fluid. Can make a mess if you don't have enough towels under your ankle.

Posted by: blueyedblond at February 2, 2009 12:54 PM

I couldn't care less if you are actually telling us for self-advertisement. Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 9:50 PM

She isn't doing that at all, TW. She's just writing about her life.

Posted by: waterbombe at February 2, 2009 11:46 AM

Perth I have known people who can't move at the drop of a hat, too...they want to make an appointment before they can decide to enjoy themselves. It's like they have to give themselves permission in advance. Maybe your friend scrubs the floors and cleans out the fridge first so that he can justfy going to the beach later...perhaps he has a bit of a puritan streak. Yes, it is boring. I couldn't hang out with someone who planned his fun.

Sorry I don't know what would help with your foot...except maybe flight stockings? Would they keep the swelling down, I wonder...but perhaps they could be a bit dangerous.

Colleen, I will try to get the book you mentioned a couple of days ago, I haven't read it yet....will let you know what I think of it. I hope you are managing with your brother...these times are very difficult.

It's best to ignore Mr M. People who don't have kids often have no idea of the impact of their words, and more often they speak from ignorance than from insight. Time and time again I've seen the most confident and "knowledgeable" people change completely once they have a child...all their mistaken "certainties" go out the window then. The transformation is remarkable in some cases. And the thing is, they have absolutely no idea what I mean by this, and if they never have children, they never will know what I mean. Making this point to them is like trying to argue with a gap in the air. It's impossible. But it's not our loss, that's the thing to remember.

Posted by: waterbombe at February 2, 2009 11:41 AM

And isn't some kind of romance part of any kind of intimate relationship, so how can you be very when it's part of something anyway. Are there varying degrees and who is setting the bar and calling the shots. I guess a candlelit dinner could be a euphamism or a romantic dinner for two, so being very romantic as opposed to romantic mean that you eat more. And really it is so unintelligent to put intellagent and there is a huge difference in meaning with quite and quiet. Tis all very baffling at times for me but then I am not particularly romantic anyway.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 11:35 AM

What does it mean when someone puts in their profile 'very romantic'. Is it rather like some who is 'intellagent and quite'. I mean, what does it mean very romantic, keeping in mind that is after stating that they like candlelight dinners, which sounds to me like walking on the beach with a glass of wine. I find that a bit of a turn off actually as I am not quite sure whether they are saying they enjoy the romantic side of a relationship or are looking for a quick bonk.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 11:27 AM

Posted by: auntykaz at February 1, 2009 8:14 PM

"Someone you know strongly suggested something. Big woop, Marcus."

Quoted for truth.

Posted by: featherlessbiped at February 2, 2009 11:25 AM

I can't understand that this two week interval is. My ex and I worked together to have equal access with my daughter more or less saying when she would go out. Sometimes he would come and take her to school and sometimes if he had time he would pick her up after and they would go for an early dinner. Couple of times I took her to his place of work if she wanted to do something special. The access was based on her needs, not on ours and although sometimes it didn't work, most times it did. I suppose the hardest thing was that we had two adults who were really forced to behave like adults, after all we were divorcing each other, not divorcing a child. My ex moved interstate and when he visited WA he would hire a car. My personal car was so much safer and better so I would take the hire car for the week and he would take our child away in my car. So many people said that is so nice of you, but it wasn't at all, I was just protecting my childs safety and isn't that what you are supposed to do when you are a mum.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 11:09 AM

Thanks Timewarp - yes t-shirt is just the go. Have got a bath full for the day and just jump in when it gets unbearable. One of the bedrooms was 43 degrees - and still cooler than outside. Thats what you get for living in the desert :)

Jen, glad to hear you've had a cool change. I remember in Adelaide they used to send kids home from school when it hit the old 100F. Never did that at my school because of bushfire risks. Safer at the school.

Perth are you having phyiso? I understand completely about not having time to rest it - but sometimes you just have to make the tiime. Few things are more important than your health.
(ps no laughing from people that know me).

Posted by: willow29 at February 2, 2009 10:59 AM

Hey Mad, seems like the sarcasm and jealousy is directed at us today. Oh well, same old same old. Well, I am off to see some ex workmates, at an ex job at an ex company and so busy busy busy, here I go flying out the door, wheeeeeeeeeee....seeyuz !!!

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 10:59 AM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 1, 2009 7:17 PM. Someone with insight has strongly suggested to me that the little girl's mother was fighting the father in court to stop him having access to the kids because she knew that he was capable of murder. She knew this from what she had seen him say and do to the kids previously. I think he should get a sentence that reflects this.

Posted by: waterbombe at February 2, 2009 10:33 AM

Willow, a cold hand towel on the back of the neck is amazing for reducing core temperature. Even keep a couple of damp ones in the fridge for future use. If there is any kind of breeze around at all it will lower the temperature further. Sometimes that can just get you enough time to prepare for the next onslaught of the heat. Also very good if you have a headache or a headache coming on. We've had some very hot nights here, but nothing like over east and I can easily appreciate when it goes on for days and days can be very distressing. Cold towels works for the horses as well, just draped behind the ears at the poll and then wiped on their muzzle and up their face. i hope it cools down for everyone soon.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 10:21 AM

It is cooler here today and I hope it is for all you guys sweltering in the eastern states. Big Day Out was on yesterday with thousands of people attending dancing around in the heat. I believe it was great though and lots of people had a good time. Our house was full of teenagers in the morning meeting here to have a drink and a swim before walking down for the day. At the other end of the day, quite a few came back and just floated around trying to cool sunburn and just unwind a bit. They were good, really good and realize we can't make a lot of noise in the evening as we live in the burbs. It was good and easy and they are delightful company at times.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 10:05 AM

A DNA test would be entirely sufficient, not the heinous crime and also the death of the innocence of the other two little children who were forced to witness it. Some people are not mad, they are just bad in my opinion.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 2, 2009 10:00 AM

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 10:07 PM

Concise enough, Gary?

Yes thanks mate.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Posted by: jenniferhi at February 2, 2009 8:58 AM
Kids back to school this week. Am I allowed to say Hooray? Well, I'm going to! HOORAY! (hehe)

Can appreciate the sentiment Jen. However for me school going back means the children have gone back to their mother and we are back to the every second weekend BS interspersed with 11 days of lonliness. I don't think anyone who hasn't been subjected to it can understand what it's like not to see you chldren for two weeks at a time.

Gary

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 2, 2009 9:44 AM

Have heard from Lynda (ELF) and she said to say Hi to everyone.
She has found someone terrific and all going wonderful. She is still on holidays.

I for one have missed her posts. And likewise from heaps of the others. Where is everybody? Has cupids arrow finally hit and everyone is too busy to write. Or can they just not find the blogs anymore?

I'm hoping they have found love. That's much nicer. But hey, check in some of you and let's know what's happening.

Much cooler overnight, but still will be 30's most of the week. Kids back to school this week. Am I allowed to say Hooray? Well, I'm going to! HOORAY! (hehe)

Have a good one all.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at February 2, 2009 8:58 AM

istj54 at 8:40 AM (and Perth at 10.30am): "why can't we just enjoy each other...and then go home?" Been there, J. Done that, and loved it. For most of a year, about 7 years ago. Way to go.

The best bit, as far as I'm concerned, is that it's good for a relationship for the couple to be nice to one another, all the time.

But as we get older and more set in our ways, we can get crankier and less flexible.

I found it's a lot easier to be on your best behaviour for half the time and then go home and let your smile droop, than to be on duty 24/7.

Concise enough, Gary?

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 10:07 PM

Perthie at 11:21 AM: I love it when you tell us stories like that. You remind us all what a good-hearted, practical, worthwhile person you are, and I couldn't care less if you are actually telling us for self-advertisement. It just makes me feel good that there are still some fair-dinkum, down-to-earth people out there, doing good in their own localities. Goodonyer from over East!

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 9:50 PM

MAD at 6.31pm: Sorry to hear I've bored you from time to time. I'll try to write more tightly in future.

Marcus at 7.17pm: Mate, I'm not so insecure that I have to bung on the big tough-guy act, whenever any woman is watching/listening.

I'm comfortable about people - any or all people - seeing my weaknesses and/or strengths. Then they can decide accurately whether they want to get closer to me as a mate, friend or lover.

I'm looking for my match, not a worshipful disciple, so I leave the macho man/impressed woman scenario to Marcus, Mills and Boon - and the fantasies of the co-dependent.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 9:35 PM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 1, 2009 7:17 PM

“One thing I know about female minds is they are fundamentally, instinctively uneasy with pliable men who put them on a pedestal for no reason than they have a vagina�

You are so right Marcus. And once he realizes she is just a woman he has to shove her off that pedestal and his misguided feelings of betrayal and anger knows no bounds

“A distressed bloke going through Family court proceedings apparently threw a 4 year old girl from the Westgate Bridge last week.�

There you go again blaming the woman for the man’s behavior. You ought to be ashamed and so should your friend.

If these paragraphs were intended to stir the pot, you have succeeded with me. I am appalled and outraged…..and extremely angry.

I unfortunately had to suffer 4 years of family court proceedings and over 200 contempt applications against me because I refused to hand my child over to a man who had threatened to kill her.

This is personal.

I request the moderators to allow this post and I will desist from commenting further on the subject.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 1, 2009 9:12 PM

willow29 at February 1, 2009 12:49 AM: Hot alright, and my Adelaide correspondent says it is there too, as well as you and Melb.

I can sympathise. l was raised in flat open mitchell grass country on the Qld/NSW border, 500km-ish west of Brisbane. We used to have a "heat wave" every few weeks in summer, until the February monsoon.

A week of temps about 42-44, with the hottest days 46 or 47. If you touched the metal skin of the fridge with your bare arm, it burnt you.

Still 38-40 at midnight, days in a row. You took a big pannikin of water to bed, sprinkled it all over the sheet (no bedclothes) and tried to get to sleep on the evaporatively-cooled sheet before the moisture was all gone. Second mug of water if necessary.

'Cooler' here in Brissie. Very rarely over 35, or 28 at midnight, but so muggy/humid that I find it more uncomfortable than the dry heat I grew up with.

Hang in there, Willow, and if there's no-one around, you can't beat the old wet tee-shirt and knickers, plus nothing. Be your own water-bag.

I'll ask St Hugh about some rain for you, but I've heard the ozone hole is getting to him a bit.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 9:02 PM

oops sorry Marcus you were correct. The poor child was 4 years old.

Either way, the assumtion made by your friend is horribly offensive to me. .

I imagine your were expecting an infuriated response to that paragraph, suffice to say that I am appalled and sickened by it.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 1, 2009 8:37 PM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 1, 2009 7:17 PM

"One thing I know about female minds is they are fundamentally, instinctively uneasy with pliable men who put them on a pedestal for no reason than they have a vagina"

You are so right Marcus. The usual outcome once he realises that she is just a woman after all is that he must push her off that pedestal and his anger at what he sees as betrayal knows no bounds.

"A female friend with some insight, strongly suggested that he had been cuckolded and thus this child, youngest of three, was not his."

The child was 6 and the middle child.

There you go again blaming the female for the actions of the male. Your friend ougt to be ashamed. And so should you

Colleen

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 1, 2009 8:27 PM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at February 1, 2009 7:17 PM

One of your less observant posts, Marcus.
Someone you know strongly suggested something.
Big woop, Marcus.
The little girl is dead. That is the crime.
Let that not be forgotten...............K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 1, 2009 8:14 PM

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 10:59 AM

"My life is busy, so I prefer to read stuff that's relatively information-dense,"

That's pretty rich coming from you TW. As they say: "people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones"

MAD

Posted by: makeadifference1 at February 1, 2009 6:31 PM

Coventry for me was proposed, by TLD at 5.40pm last night. Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 11:50 AM

I don't think so Timewarp. I would never suggest that line of "blog freezeout bullying", for anyone, although it has been suggested for me at least once.

If you read my post which was defending you against someone's misinterpretation of your words , and connected it with the one below by iaminperth from a day or so earlier, you will see both my comment and intention was friendly. The punctuation was incorrect..should have been "See! Who says we ignore Timewap?"

"but TW drones on and on about the same sort of thing and everyone ignores it."

Posted by: iaminperth at January 30, 2009 1:02 AM

Taking the time to read your posts and bother to reply to defend you in your absence is not freezing you out I would have thought. btw I am not connected with any ofline blog social group. It is not a conspiracy.
I am completely GOBSMACKED!

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 1, 2009 6:20 PM

My foot still hurts and my ankle is swollen up pretty badly. I have had the boot off now for about 2 weeks and walking around, not terribly much but doing things fairly normally. I think the break is okay as I can push it where it was but my ankle down to my toes hurt. Anyone have any suggestions what to do with it ? Grannies remedies, whatever. Please don't tell me to put it up as I honestly don't have the time and also it seems to swell more afterwards. Maybe it's just time and maybe I am being impatient, don't know but I am fed up with it.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 1, 2009 5:42 PM

I think a lot of people are so busy nowadays posing and being pretentious they forget to smile. A smile is worth a thousand words and sometimes can convey more than words can I think. An open smile looking a person in the eyes shows interest and connection to me and also invites a response. Animals do it all the time, sidle up to you with their ears floppy and that I love you look in their eyes and they win over every time. Some people sit there with the dead pan straight face and the now you need to amuse me look on their face. What a laugh they are. Mind you i can amuse myself looking at them so I guess there is some logic to it.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 1, 2009 5:35 PM

Hay Colleen.

It's the biggest favour I have done for him. Everyone is talking about him, even saying nice things about him. Wow!

And he, hasn't had to say anything at all.

Too funny!

xx

Posted by: tassiedude1 at February 1, 2009 2:44 PM

Perth...Feb 1, 10;44....Yes,I agree....a welcoming smile and an aura of happiness do seem to attract warm feelings all around....

Posted by: artizanne at February 1, 2009 2:28 PM

istj54 at 8:40 AM: Hi J! I would never presume to expect some reply to every one of my posts. That would be egocentrically unrealistic.

I write each post to amuse myself and/or youall, or to add another viewpoint to an ongoing debate, or to stir one of the mates - my contributions to trying to keep our blogs interesting, enjoyable and worth reading.

If someone says "Good one, TW" I am very gratified at having my contribution acknowledged.

If no-one does, I want to know that my last post wasn't worth a mention, rather than that I'm being purpoely frozen out. That's all.

Just got a text from my 2007 ex, wishing me luck with my lunch date, Now is that heart-warming or what? Seeyez much later.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 12:09 PM

kaz at 11:22 PM: No, Coventry for me was proposed, by TLD at 5.40pm last night.

I was slightly upset, because I see blogs as being internet parties - a mob of us are within earsot, somebody talks, everybody listens in the hope of being entertained or informed, and somebody replies.

Sometimes the reply is "You're wrong you know! It's actually ..." or "You are so right, because ..." but if the reply is "Who wants to listen to you? Shuddup ya mug!" then there is a bully in our midst. Didn't expect it would be TLD. So unexpected in fact that I was momentarily jaw-dropped by the smack.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 11:50 AM

iaminperth at 10:30 PM: I really related to that. I'm definitely with you. The best adventures are sudden, spur of the moment expeditions with a friend to who-cares-where. And taking a dog makes it better! (BTW, Is it OK for me to show my values, if they agree with yours?)

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 11:27 AM

Thanks Colleen, My dog is a big wuzzy pooch at home and welcomes everyone to our house by giving them a shoe and then leaning on them for a pat. I can imagine if she were out of control chasing some poor innocent person down the road trying to give them a shoe and lean on them, they would probably pass away with a heart attack. I am extremely mindful of her size and strength. In saying that though I do feel for some of the owners of the little white powderballs. A gsd is one of the easiest dogs to train and being a sheepdog stays close and is extremely responsive to being called. These woolly white things seem to go totally deaf to owners commands and are so strong willed totally defy them. Mind you I think a lot of the woolly wuzz owners forget the poor thing is a dog and it's never allowed to run free and get wet and dirty. Also some of these little things were bred as hunting dogs and they find themselves confined as lap dogs. Some are awfully aggressive also. We looked after a very strong willed one for a week once whilst its owner was in hospital and took it to the beach every day, ran it ragged and made it swim. After a couple of days the behaviour changed so dramatically it was like a totally new dog. He loved it, absolutely loved it, stopped attacking other dogs, stopped peeing up peoples legs, ate like a horse and behaved himself far better after a growl from me. This little thing even sat at the front door prior to having his lead put on to go out.....no I am not carrying him, he is a dog. Anyway, went back to owner who was mortified by his coat but it's now back to normal. We are still friends and her dog is back to all his old tricks because she doesn't let him run free now and then, get dirty and wet and just let him be a dog. My suggestion of having him clipped and throwing him in the back of my car now and then on the way to the beach was met with a half smile and a steeley gaze so I have never mentioned it again, lol. p.s. constant suggestions of having him also desexed hasn't helped either and I have now learned to mind my own business and shut up.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 1, 2009 11:21 AM

iaminperth at 9:39 PM: Thank you for your feedback about Marcus and me side by side, showing your own values. He really brings out the best in you, and I was very impressed.

BTW I'm taking your advice - it's a lunch-time first date today, at a front-row table in an upmarket pub with sea views and breeze. And I won't even think whether any of the chef's expensive ingredients come out of a packet, bottle or tin.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 11:19 AM

amber at 8:27 PM: Rain's what S.A. has in winter mainly and Qld mainly in summer. One of my main memories of my half-dozen summer viisits to Adelaide is brown playing fields already by November.

In Brisbane we've had enough of the stuff lately to let them relax and ask us to use no more than 155 litres of water per person per day, instead of the previous 140 cap.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 11:09 AM

I really feel for you guys in the heatwave. We are having 'weird' weather in WA but it is not particularly hot. It is humid at times and there was a little thunder last night but nothing like yours. We are reading about the temperatures and hearing about it all the time on the news. It must be so hard for people who can't move around very well, the elderly or crippled, and of course the poor babies. I have heard that the welfare shelters for animals are being hit hard as well. So sad all of it. I live in a world of air conditioning, seems almost obscene when you hear of how uncomfortable people are at the moment.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 1, 2009 11:00 AM

fifilafume at 8:12 PM: Too deep for me Colleen. The leaf fell, but the penny didn't drop. And I'm very sorry you took personally my previous comment about the song writer who took 69 lines to tell us that chicks dig metaphors, but you shouldn't mix them.

My life is busy, so I prefer to read stuff that's relatively information-dense, so Sparks' poem was for me a very long time between drinks,

Sorry also that I put my comment so clumsily. Pax?

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 1, 2009 10:59 AM

I am perplexed that anyone would think that a throw away statement about somebody by somebody else which was obviously not a diagnosis...(how could it be?) would warrant discussion on whether the first somebody really was "afflicted" or the second somebody was "out of order" to make the throw away statement when as far as I can see the only result of the throw away statement by the first somebody was to ensure that many many more posts were added to this blog about the second somebody.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at February 1, 2009 10:49 AM

Willow, It is probably the combination of the two of you turning heads. The visual is probably one of a happy person and a happy dog and I think happiness attracts more than anything. A smile for me, an open and honest welcoming look will win the day for me anytime.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 1, 2009 10:44 AM

I go back to my original observations of the person not being who they say they are. I think it's a shame I really do because it assures loneliness and possibly some form of depression. By facing up to the fact that you have virtually 'stuffed it up' and can count the rest of your life in months rather than years, only then could a person move forward. I tend to believe that only by being who you really are will you attract another person and therefore find the companionship and happiness if that is what you are seeking. People see thru the bluster very quickly and I am sure a few very experienced mature ladies would have him pegged within the first hour or so.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 1, 2009 10:38 AM

Perth @ 10.13. I agree completely. I met a woman who had a husband and two sons with Aspergers and she's an incredible individual.

Posted by: willow29 at February 1, 2009 10:31 AM

istj. Exactly what I have been saying for ages, two houses are the go!!!

Posted by: iaminperth at February 1, 2009 10:30 AM

....the gist of it was that I do not condone any poor behaviour, it was the flippant diagnosis and insensitivty if the person does indeed have some symptoms...also have observed what you were saying...in fact, everyday between adults, children and both...doesn't seem fair but there are always favourites who get away with murder:))...

Posted by: istj54 at February 1, 2009 10:26 AM

Surely people are not doing online diagnosis now, bit over the to don't you think. I think to have a child born with autism or asperbergers must be an incredible challenge for any parent, not to mention an incredible challenge for any child. I don't know a lot about it obviously but have the highest respect for parents who work tirelessly to bring up these children. Whilst I also realize there must be some incredible highs along the way, there must be moments of terrible sadness also and sheer frustration and exhaustion. I think anyone in these circumstances is an amazing individual.

Posted by: iaminperth at February 1, 2009 10:13 AM

TW...look, I am not ignoring you...but am flummoxed...that you need to have constant feedback here in blogland...why? A good question to ask yourself...why do you need to be part of a clique...and obviously offended when you perceive yourself to be left out...why do you need your posts acknowledged...I just write for me here and am not part of any group...here merely for my own enjoyment...and in the constant hope that a debate may ensue to get our teeth into...I have another topic...how do people manage to merge lives when they begin to seriously date...especially over 35...as we have os many habits, family stuff etc in place...is it perhaps at this stage that things come asunder...it's hard to give up habits entrenched for years to welcome someone new into your life...another question...do we really have to...why can't we just date happily...especially since we are no longer genetically viable...that's for you Marcus...why can't we just enjoy each other...and go home?...it all gets so serious and heavy...and spoliled at this stage.

I don't recall that Marcus did always talk genetics...I think he just has a policy now of fitting it into every discussion...very easily cos you can always put the blame on it...and forget the "civilization" of the homo sapien species over the last years.

Posted by: istj54 at February 1, 2009 8:40 AM

...what about flabbergasted?...that's not a bad one...but then again. maybe lynath you may have meant that we shoud not be dumb struck at anything anymore...and it isn't the word at fault...just the meaning...I have lots of fun at work making children come up with ten alternatives to the swear words I catch them using...it can be very funny...oh gosh/golly...doesn't quite cut it:))

Posted by: istj54 at February 1, 2009 7:47 AM

TW - puleasse send some rain here - 47 degrees today... mid forties all next week.

Posted by: willow29 at February 1, 2009 12:49 AM

Posted by: willow29 at January 29, 2009 2:50 PM
"I was training Tickety-boo to be a Community Companion dog but might have to skip this year. He is a Border Collie x - not only loyal, but absolutely gorgeous. When we go walking, I know its him that turns the heads, not me."

Posted by: tassiedude1 at February 1, 2009 12:11 AM

Ninaschen maybe " slightly surprised" or "quite horrified" would suit you more......
I like the term "poor form" myself and will use it in a sentence.

Suffice to say that for me l find it poor form to even begin to diagnose anybody with anything. We ain't doctors after all.

Timewarp, what is this,you being modest ??
Generally funny, at times verbose, now and then puzzling, but never in Coventry!

Lovely cooler conditions here in Melbourne tonight, yesterday was the hottest day in a hundred years or so, 45.1. Utterly terrible conditions, we have have a shocker of a week.

Hope that the cooler weather was also felt in SA, Amber, and that some relief is felt.

Now, l think l will make a hot cup of tea and actually enjoy it............K

Posted by: auntykaz at January 31, 2009 11:22 PM

Why is it that some people need to have everything so organised. I sent an sms to a friend and said I was heading down to the beach with my dog. He said that he would love to but couldn't at the moment, which was fine with me, but he said he would love to go another day.
Turns out he wasn't busy at all but couldn't come to terms with just getting up and going to the beach. Now he is saying when are you going to the beach again. Well, I don't now because I work and I am recovering from a broken foot and it is as hot as you know what here. It really comes down to the fact that an instant decision had to be made and the person involved was incapable of doing this. He has since said that he will be able to go on ........whatever day.........at whatever time and if I let him know a day before etc., etc., The guy doesn't do anything all day and hangs around asking me out but when I said let's go to the beach, he needs an appointment made. This is not isolated, why can't people, just say yes, that sounds great and head off. I think spontaneity is going out the window and everything has to be churched over, discussed worried about and then maybe, just then you can do anything. I would prefer just to take my dog to the beach and talk to anyone there who wants to talk to me. What happened to getting out of your chair and jumping at the chance of getting out in the open and going to the beach with the dog. The guy is chomping at the bit to go out to dinner and then come back home but a walk on the beach is too much effort it seems. Boring, boring, or am I expecting too much.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 31, 2009 10:30 PM

It's such a shame Lynath that we don't have a button, however, most of the time with or without the button we all do anyway, he just hasn't realised as yet.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 31, 2009 10:23 PM

Maybe I am missing something? Posted by: amberlight58 at January 31, 2009 6:57 PM - Amber, think sex :))

Posted by: wistfuldeb at January 31, 2009 10:06 PM

So what values do you add to the blog. Repetitious moaning about your ex, equally long tirades about meeting hundreds of women, the poor old dears. Trying to big note yourself on most occasions, trying to make out you are someone you are not. There are no values, there is a lack of values unfortunately and that's why you are all alone. Canned Soup and a game of scrabble is not a night out for most ladies I can assure you.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 31, 2009 9:39 PM

I think Marcus showed huge sensitivity when he was a little concerned about taking a child to the zoo on his own. I think he would have preferred another adult, or even another child to go along with him. I think his ability and knowledge of creatures would have contributed to a wonderful day out for a child but unfortunately in this day and age it is very difficult for an adult male to be solely with a young child. Marcus realised this and was hesitant showing great concern for the child and also for the mother. To me this shows a sensibility and sensitivity and I am sure they sorted out the dilemma amicably and maturely.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 31, 2009 9:34 PM

TW,
Rain? What's that?

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 31, 2009 8:27 PM

Posted by: ninaschen at January 31, 2009 7:22 PM

Of course, I remember Benny fondly....such a dirty little "old" man......and very funny....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 31, 2009 8:27 PM

Posted by: ninaschen at January 31, 2009 7:22 PM

Yes. I am Nina! And I agree, that's what I think of too. Wasn't he just wonderful?

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 31, 2009 8:25 PM

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 31, 2009 5:15 PM

l(a

le
af
fa

ll
s)
one
l

iness

deep enough for your timewarp.....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 31, 2009 8:12 PM

Hey! I'm not standing up for nor protecting Marcus. And I certainly don't condone many of the comments he has made in the past. In fact, some have been downright distasteful. My comment was about labeling someone (anyone!) publically and talking about that person as if they weren't there. He may very well have Aspergers, I don't know, I'm no expert. Why not ask him?

Posted by: ninaschen at January 31, 2009 8:10 PM

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 31, 2009 7:08 PM

I haven't been able to do my share to date, My 84 year old mother has organised her young adult grandchildren my nephews and nieces to do most of the taxing as they were available over the summer break.

My sister was made redundant by bhp the week before me, so now it will be up to his two sisters to taxi him to and from his treatments.

I can't imagine anything I would prefer to be doing over the next three weeks.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 31, 2009 8:08 PM

thealmostalwaysestimablelynathdiary at 5:40 PM: "See who says we ignore Timewarp"

Yes, let's see who proposes it out loud, and how they each justify out loud sending me to Coventry (ie. beyond Amber's observation at 6.37pm "In fact a majority....")

But let's not have anyone support my value to the blogs, because that would be far too democratic and uncliquey.

Off to dance with my social club Dabblers, second night running, to make up for tennis being rained out both nights last week. Gotta keep alive .... Seeyez.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 31, 2009 7:48 PM

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 31, 2009 5:15 PM

geez timewarp....it's the sentiment....

I.give you guys some insight into what women like and you have got to find something wrong with it.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 31, 2009 7:46 PM

Grego:

You won. :)

Good on you.

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 31, 2009 7:45 PM

amberlight58 at 6:37 PM: I reckon you're spot on with all of that, and I'm so glad you reconsidered and are continuing to hang around.

eg. "Oh isn't he awful?" "Boys will be boys" "Stoppit I like it." "He's so masterful!" "Ain't 'e funny?"

I had hoped all that had been turfed out on its ear, when the robust equal-standards feminists took over from the tea and scones brigade, but you say not. That's a pity.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 31, 2009 7:26 PM

Thanks, Lynath. I've been keeping abreast (down, Marcus) of the goings-on by reading but not contributing. I think I simply ran out of words. I'm attempting to refuel!

Dumbfounded. That'll do I think, ISTJ! Actually, when I visualise that never-to-be-uttered-again phrase, I don't see someone smacking someone else in the you-know-what. An image of Jack Benny (anyone other than TW and me old enough to remember him?) comes to mind with his hand slapping his own cheek, his eyes widening and his mouth open in astonishment. That's my story anyway, and I'm sticking to it.

Posted by: ninaschen at January 31, 2009 7:22 PM

Posted by: fifilafume at January 30, 2009 9:14 AM

Colleen,
I like your style, girl! Turning a negative into a positive!
Sounds wonderful, go for it!

In the mean time, I am sure your brother will appreciate your support :)

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 31, 2009 7:08 PM

Just for the record, the correct name is Aspergers Syndrome. And for those that don't know it is an Autism Spectrum disorder.

I do know a bit about it. I have a son with it.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 31, 2009 7:04 PM

Posted by: wistfuldeb at January 31, 2009 3:02 PM

Hi Deb,
Marcus has "underlying caring sensitivities (somewhat distorted by blatant honesty at times)" and a "need for affection"?
A need for attention yes, but affection?

I would love someone to refer me to the many blog posts since I have been on RSVP, that give the impression that Marcus has "underlying caring sensitivities"!
Are we talking about sensitivity towards lizards or humans?
You can't be referring to women!

Maybe I am missing something?

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 31, 2009 6:57 PM

Posted by: glitteringblue at January 24, 2009 4:03 PM

"Hope Grego coughed up that bottla champers for you ladies!'

Glitter, a bet was made between another well known blogger and myself on how long a certain romance was going to last between two other bloggers. I think it is correct to say that both the romantic parties revealed themselves on the blogs at the time the romance commenced and have also revealed that the romance is now concluded.

This saddens me but it appears that both parties are happy and have successfully moved after a pleasant interlude with each other. My interest therefore is of couse purely sporting.

The fine details of the wager were not really concluded between me and the other blogger. As I recall, if the romance lasted 3 months or until Christmas I would win and if less than that the other blogger won.The definitions of date of commencement and conclusion were not settled either.

At the height of the romance one party to the romance suggested I could confidently increase the wager to a crate of champers but it was left as a bottle.

Unfortunately, I have had no information on when the romance actually ended. If any of the parties can provide that data my wagering colleague and I could settle our bet.

My profile is not up at the moment and my apologies for making a post whilst hidden.
rgds grego

Posted by: grego7 at January 31, 2009 6:51 PM

Oh and come on It's tassie.....Dude not "Tude"

Lol

Later!

xx

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 31, 2009 6:45 PM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 31, 2009 3:38 PM

So true, Lynath. Just trying putting your feet up or leaving an empty drink can or plate of greasy chips on THEIR sofa!

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 31, 2009 6:43 PM

Hi Lynath:

I am a firm believer of the Karma aspect and I think the reason good things are happening to me is because I have been spending so much of my life "putting Back" rather than taking. And I will continue to do so.

As far as the long term thing goes, been there done that, and it's just too much of a heartache to be bothered to do it again. At least for a while, anyway.

Now the play station. I know, I know but it's just so tall, black and shinny and I'm a sucker for bright shiny things. :) Plus it plays Blue Ray and thats supposed to be good, isn't it?................

My innuendo to Willow was that she is far to attractive to think that it is her four legged friend that turns heads and yes she is far to polite to reply to that.

Love you all!

Rod

xxx

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 31, 2009 6:43 PM

Posted by: ninaschen at January 31, 2009 3:52 PM

Sorry ladies, I would normally support you 100% with what you say, but after the number of women (although we like to pretend he is not referring to women "like us" I am certain Marcus considers he is!)Marcus has lampooned and derided just in the last year or so I have been on these blogs, if he gets a bit of it back, so be it!
If you can give it out, you should be able to take it and lets face it, it is all 'water of a ducks back' to Marcus who appears to revel in the attention he gets.

I find it interesting (and ISTJ with your knowledge of Psychology, I would be interested in knowing why that is) that in so many social groups, there is often one, who behaves like a buffooon, in a rude and impolite manner yet is ALWAYS tolerated by the group. Usually much more so by women.
In fact a majority of the women feel positively protective of the person and will explain away and justify all kinds of offensive behaviour, with the reasoning "oh that's so and so, he's a bit of a pain but that is just the way he is"
Always to me it seems, the person so protected is a male, who interacts with the group in a very immature fashion.

The same type of rude and aggressive behaviour exhibited by a woman is almost never tolerated. In fact, if a woman exhibits such behaviour she is usually shunned or excluded by the group.
A man who is would normally be mature in his interactions with the group, is similarly castigated if he ever behaves out of character.
If anyone tries to make the person accountable for his behaviour, no matter how rude or outrageous, people (once again usually women) feel compelled to step in and say "leave him alone!"
It almost appears that some members of the group are giving the person "permission" to continue to behave rudely and never have to take any responsibility for the angst and hurt they my cause others.

It is certainly not just on the RSVP blogs that I see this happen, but in all kinds of social groups whether they consist of younger or older people.

Is it that such a person brings out the 'maternal' and 'protective' instincts in some women?
Just curious that's all. Has anyone else noticed a similar thing within their own, or their children's friendship groups?

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 31, 2009 6:37 PM

...what about...dumbfounded, Lynath?

Posted by: istj54 at January 31, 2009 6:23 PM

Marcus at 3:41 AM: Sorry that you weren't pleased with all the attention, mate, even if the metaphor was a bit too esoteric for you.

Must go look for a cheap chook. Cheers.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 31, 2009 5:45 PM

Waterbombe I don't think he called you darling. He was putting himself in the mind of the man with the remote.

See who says we ignore Timewarp>

Ninaschen(nice to see you back)It probably did come out of the UK..should have been confiscated at Customs......

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 31, 2009 5:40 PM

waterbombe at 3:42 PM: Sorry sorry sorry!

I was simultaneously
* putting words in YOUR darling's mouth,
* nodding and falling off my perch in the wee hours (already after 2am, and only had 4 hours' sleep the night before), and
* forgetting to put the inverted commas round " Thank you Darling for your empathy! "

Ma'am, I would never have the effrontery to presume to call you darling myself. I also lack the motivation on one hand and the irony on the other. Down, fangge!!

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 31, 2009 5:36 PM

fifilafume at 3:07 PM: How old was he when he wrote that? 15? Afraid I'm a bit more into deep than long.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 31, 2009 5:15 PM

Yeah, I know, Marcus has said some gob-smacking (oops! Sorry Lynath!) things himself. But we don't have to follow his bad example.

As for g*b s****ing, I thought it came out of the UK? The first time I heard it was when my niece used it after an extended stay there.

Posted by: ninaschen at January 31, 2009 3:52 PM

RSVP is just providing Marcus with accessibility to women he only ever dreamt of ten years ago....he has found his niche and life has never been better! Similar to many middle age men, i assume. Wistfuldeb at January 31, 2009 3:02 PM .

Totally on target there, Wistfuldeb!

Posted by: waterbombe at January 31, 2009 3:49 PM

TW, did you call me DARLING??? I don't believe it! Don't ever ever ever do that again. It was hours before I could pick myself up from the floor. Actually the remote works because he and I both have a sense of humour, that's all, and we can laugh at ourselves. It's that simple, really.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 31, 2009 3:42 PM

Faking It costs $40 but the ABC puts out a monthly magazine called Delicious which is exactly the same thing.I think it's about $7 a copy. The thing is, every recipe is so easy and so stunning that you really don't need a lot of magazines...I think I got about 6, then I stopped buying them. Honestly, I am usually a good cook (not always) but with these recipes I have had people at dinner parties entirely silent while they ate (and not because of something I said, which is the other way I can achieve that). I think your friend would be pleased with either option, Perth.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 31, 2009 3:40 PM

Tassietude,
Life is for having as much fun as you can handle and afford! The definition of what exactly "fun" is will be different for every person, as will happiness factor. Money does not necessarily ensure happiness or satisfaction in life..

If you are not tied down by other overwhelming responsibilities just to survive as a large proportion of the world are, and are able to follow that ideal then you should always remember to put something back in too.

Rregarding the 20 year olds may I refer you to Marcus ten years on from you

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 31, 2009 3:41 AM

While your having fun with them temporarily someone perfect for the long term may pass you by.
PS as a once proud Mario Brothers addict and champion I do not begrudge you the playstation...but it is still a bit of a symbol of the adolescent....

Watebombe re the OH+S...there are whole departments and vigilante groups on tap however you are right only a spoil sport old cat woman without a husband in sight.. would be mean enough to complain about the dog creche not to mention the "accidents"

MAD the only way to see the kids pick up after themselves is to visit them when they have left home...
I have plans to go to my sons place and run up a $1000 phone bill for a start....then leave the milk out or better yet put containers back in the fridge empty and always leave the toilet roll empty or perhaps with one scrap left so that I can act as though I didn't notice...I will also either break in bending all the fly screens and trampling the garden because I have forgotten my key, or I will stay out until at least 4.30 am then knock on his window to let me in.....

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 31, 2009 3:38 PM

METAPHOR by SPARKS

A metaphor is a glorious thing,
A diamond ring,
The first day of summer
A metaphor is a breath of fresh air,
A turn-on,
An aphrodisiac

Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors,
Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors,
Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors

Use them wisely,
Use them well,
And you'll never know the hell of lonliness

A metaphor is a popular place,
A pocket space,
A multiplex showing,
A remake whose action is louder than words,
She whispers "can we be going, going?"

Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors,
Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors,
Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors

Use them wisely,
Use them well,
And you'll never know the hell of lonliness
Whose up for a metaphor?
(We're up for a metaphor)
Are you chicks up for a metaphor?
(Yes, we're up for a metaphor)

Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't mix them
(We, we, we won't mix them)
Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't mix them
(We wouldn't dream of mixing them)

Use them wisely,
Use them well,
And you'll never know the hell of lonliness

A metaphor is a glorious thing,
A diamond ring,
The first day of summer
A metaphor is a fresh air,
A turn-on,
An aphrodisiac

Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors,
Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors,
Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors

A metaphor is a glorious thing,
A diamond ring,
The first day of summer
A metaphor is a breath fresh air,
A turn-on,
An aphrodisiac

Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors,
Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors,
Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors

Use them wisely,
Use them well,
And you'll never know the hell of lonliness

A metaphor is a glorious thing,
(Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig)
A metaphor is a breath of fresh air,
(Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig)
A metaphor is a glorious thing,
(Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig)
A metaphor is a breath of fresh air,
(Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig)

Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors,
Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors,
Chicks dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig metaphors

Use them wisely,
Use them well,
And you'll never know the hell of lonliness

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 31, 2009 3:07 PM

Could people please stop using that dreadful expression "gob smacked"
Thnk about what it means. If you are the sort of person who finds it a routine occurance in your life to be punched in the face then by all means go right ahead..other wise YUk!
I even heard Nicole Kidman use it during an interview on US TV and then being asked to explain the meaning. She told the interviewer that it is an "Australian expression'
Well not in my world it isn't! I certainly don't like our nation being portrayed as half witted, fighting drinking yokels wit the women outdoing the men.
Please ban "gobsmacked" from our language.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 31, 2009 3:03 PM

That's just rude and insensitive. Posted by: ninaschen at January 31, 2009 1:05 PM - Nina, everything that goes around, comes around, wouldn't you say :)) Seriously, Marcus can hardly suffer from Aspersers when he revels in being the centre of blog attention (kinda like being the most popular kid in school)! Perhaps a loner and introvert by nature, his underlying caring sensitivities (somewhat distorted by blatant honesty at times) and need for affection doesn't correspond with that diagnosis either. No, RSVP is just providing Marcus with accessibility to women he only ever dreamt of ten years ago and with his particular slant on ethology, which incidentally does examine the differences between micro-organism species (think, slime) not just primate behaviours, he has found his niche and life has never been better! Similar to many middle age men, i assume. Marcus, you are classic :))

Last night at St Kilda's dog beach i remembered why i don't like suburban beaches (apart from the sand dunes that filled my car, the bikini that was hardly worth wearing and the repugnant low tide smell), the loud obnoxious people aimlessly milling about. How rude!

Timewarp, WB - deep amusing analogies, loved them :))

Dude, Willow wasn't going to acknowledge your innuendo, she is too polite for that!

Colleen, bad luck with the job. Happening everywhere at the moment.

Jen, i'm with you on the heat. Hope Amber is surviving SA :))

Now back to my studies...

Posted by: wistfuldeb at January 31, 2009 3:02 PM

Posted by: iaminperth at January 29, 2009 11:16 PM

Glad to hear that Perth. I was only speaking from personal experience. The women I know who own dogs are wussy and their dogs behaviour like the pack leader because they, the women don't know how to, or don't want to know how to lead the pack.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 31, 2009 2:46 PM

Marcus you really ask for trouble don't you...

'sigh'....te he lol roffl and :-)
Firstly what did you say? I can only imagine...

Secondly the descriptor 'chubby'...your use of it implies that you are surprised that someone "like that" would dare to reject you

If all the birthday recipients are already keen cooks I would skip "Faking It" A subscription to a foodie magazine would be better and probably less expensive..

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 31, 2009 1:53 PM

Yeah I know Marcus, but just thought you might get a laugh. x

Ninachen ~ No offence but I think Marcus can wear just about anything dished out. After all isn't he the king of "rude and insensitive" on these blogs a lot of the time.

Hope everyone is coping in this sweltering heat. Surely it has to stop soon. Please!

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 31, 2009 1:46 PM

...exactly my sentiments too, ninaschen...I have been too gob-smacked to comment.

Posted by: istj54 at January 31, 2009 1:29 PM

I find it extraordinary that the 'experts' on here are able to diagnose someone with Aspberger's on the basis of a few (okay, trillions of) posts. Perhaps you know Marcus intimately and are qualified to make such a judgement but to discuss your diagnosis in a public forum as if Marcus isn't 'in the room' is gob-smacking!

That's just rude and insensitive.

Posted by: ninaschen at January 31, 2009 1:05 PM

My son is having his 27th birthday and I think I will get him that book "Faking it". He has a keen interest in cooking so should enjoy it....thanks for that reference , Waterbombe.
Marcus some very good suggestions from you for gifts as well.
Another hot day today, the beach would be a better place to be.

Posted by: aquamanda56 at January 31, 2009 9:02 AM

waterbombe at 1:32 PM: If you insist. I've seen them in the shops, and had a read and a smile.

So why does your bloke like his remote woman controller? Let me guess:

* You gave him something that actually acknowledges the difficulties that men frequently have with the nature and behaviour of women. Adorably empathic!

* It fantasises that these difficulties could be reliably overcome with a quick touch on a labelled button on a remote, instead of the man having to stand up, go over to the set and try a number of random adjustments, in the hope that one of them might work - twiddle this knob, press that one, stroke the touch-screen, and so on.

After which the man may have achieved the changes to the woman's emotional and behavioural settings that he'd wish for. In the short term. Or he may not.

* It's the embodiment of a man's deepest hopes and dreams about making his life more predictable and enjoyable. Definitely a Good Thing.

Thank you Darling for your empathy! Next best thing to actually behaving in a way that stops him wanting to use the remote.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 31, 2009 3:21 AM

Posted by: waterbombe at January 30, 2009 8:51 AM

Like you I love Annie Proulx....and her sparse style of writing..

One of my favourite love stories, is of course, brokeback mountain and I think Heath Ledger was sublimely believable.

Such a wasted talent.

I am at present reading Gabriel Garcia Marquez, almost the exact opposit, beautiful expressive prose....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 30, 2009 10:22 PM

Posted by tassiedude1 at January 30, 2009 1:00 PM

strange as it might seem tassiedude, it is not so much the conversation that they are interested in,,,,,,more the loving....or at least that is what I glean from the emails I receive.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 30, 2009 10:05 PM

"heaven forbid." Interesting turn of phrase from you Waterbombe!

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 30, 2009 9:44 PM

I'm going to get the faking it book for a bit of fun and very useful as well and I am going to take Marcus advice and have a look for something lovely to keep. He likes nice things around him and I think that's a great idea. I rather like the beautiful jarrah timber we have here in WA so might have a look if there is something jarrah. Or, I don't know but it has given me food for thought and I will go to the West Aust. Art Gallery tomorrow after work and see what splendid items they have on display there. He is such a nice person and very close to purchasing his own home and also likes to entertain outside. His outdoor area is beautifully set up with numerous plants in pots and the barbecue set up is so good. Everything is removal for when he purchases his own house. A couple of years ago on his birthday I gave him a standard cumquat tree in a large dark brown ceramic pot and it flowers and fruits constantly and looks wonderful. It has pride of place outside and it makes me happy too because he obviously enjoys it. We all get cumquats in brandy every now and then, which I don't particularly like the taste of but they look splendid and the thought that goes into them absolutely priceless.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 30, 2009 9:29 PM

So don't leave us in the dark. What do they say for man, woman, kid. Anyway to get the kids to pick up after themselves? Posted by: makeadifference1 at January 30, 2009 4:47 PM

Yes it did have a button for that on the kids one, MAD. The others I don't remember. Mr W's is at his place so I can't check atm. I thought they were really well thought out and very funny...not the usual crap you'd expect, but real stuff you'd want but never dare ask for in case you were thought to be insensitive/sexist/shallow. I mean you'd only use them with good friends who'd know you didn't really mean it, heaven forbid.

I think on the Control a Man one it had a button for switching off the "Where is" function. You know, "where is my shirt?" , "where is the margarine?", "where is my briefcase?" and so on. The women will know why we'd want a button to switch that off.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 30, 2009 8:21 PM

I have it on fairly good authority that he is actually quite a nice guy face to face. Blogs may be a different matter but oh well.

Enjoy your day everybody.

xxx

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 30, 2009 1:00 PM
Marcus I think the real you has been exposed.
I` also have it on fairly good authority that from someone who has met you that "pooches"at January 30, 2009 1:01 AM has you pegged
cheers Kenny

Posted by: tallerthantom at January 30, 2009 3:49 PM

waterbombe at 8:51 AM: You're kidding! Or else you only read your own posts, which we all know isn't true.

Think 'unavoidable instinctive behaviour', 'reptile lover' and 'gallons of seed' - thoughts that you've referred to yourself in the past, many times. No, you're definitely kidding/stirring. You know who he is. Just compare the size of a duck with a budgie.

And of course I know about hot dogs!

At Wendy's they savagely deflower the new buns with an over-size pointy-ended heated steel cylinder, after which slipping the Frank (or Tom or Harry) into them is no problem. Third-world cruelty I reckon.

Must get back to work. Missing Outback's Friday love-ins.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 30, 2009 1:35 PM

Perth, re your young friend...my daughter gave me a book called "Faking It" which is a cook book, not a sex advice manual, as you might think. It is a compilation of recipes from the ABC's magazine Delicious. Every single recipe is sublime...and they are all low-effort too. (But you can go the hard way if you are a hard-core chef.) That book is astonishingly good...really worth a look.
Also I gave my partner a remote control for Xmas, its called Control A Woman, and it has lots of buttons that you push to get what you want from a woman ... it is so bad, it is very funny as long as you are not a radical separatist feminist. Mr W keeps his on the bedside table and lives in hope it will work someday, ha ha. They do a Control a Man one and Control a Kid. They look and work exactly like a real remote so you can leave it lying around and guests will use it...my partner's 20-year old daughter was clicking madly on it in front of the TV and wondering why it wouldn't work, and then she read it and exploded. I don't know if they do one for gay men but you could check it out...one of those expensive gift shops had it for $12.

I gave him a few things for Xmas but that was his favourite thing. Hmmm. I wonder why? I expect TW and Marcus and H2H will be popping up shortly to tell me why.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 30, 2009 1:32 PM

Poochesinperth January 30, 2009 9:02 AM

As far a birthday gifts for a sensitive 30 yo man goes I would suggest something decorative and long lasting for his home.
I like 'objets' and I think something that will be well remembered would be a nice. An older period piece like a vase or a decorative jug; perhaps a lamp in a classic style.
I like quality craft/art and grew up with people who made it so something like a turned burr wooden bowl, a polished native timber 'things' box or a nice handmade and glazed pottery fruit bowl will be remembered for the function, style and sentiment of the giver.
I took a female friend who is in her late 50's to the wonderful Cranbourne Botannic Gardens a few weeks ago. They have a large section off innovative large scale garden designs. They recently aquired an adjoining farm and are letting it revert to bushland and incorporating it into the original gardens. We went along the 3 km nature trail there. We saw a flock of the large and shiny, dark feathered Glossy Ibis grazing. I spotted a slow moving, shuffling, dark animal shape a couple of hundred metres away. What's this? I said to her slightly blank look and peering and brow furrowing. It's not a wombat or Swamp wallaby. We walked over and my friend was rewarded with her first ever sighting (and gentle touching) of an echidna. Animal was hardly concerned though it did take up its defensive position, legs in and head tucked down. It soon decided we were no threat and made a show of excavating an ants nest. Talk about tongue flicking when it comes time to pick up dinner.
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 30, 2009 1:23 PM

Talk about wine........

Just got back from the beach. Nothing like a morning surf to clear away the cob-webs and with a clear head I'm off to chase a little white ball up the middle of the fairway and onto the green.

Colleen:

Maybe they aren't getting enough stimulating conversation from their own age group. Funny though that they don't really appear interested in talking. :)

Hay I do the same sort of work, as your friend and I have to say it's absolutely brilliant. Pay sucks but imagine doing fun things with a bunch of the happiest people you will ever meet.

lynath:

I'm hearing ya.

I used to be so serious now I'm going on forty I just seem to be letting go of everything. I don't have a worry in the world. I wouldn't trade places for anything.

Maybe I'm just not sure how a forty year old, without kids, who is free to do whatever he wants, is supposed to be thinking.

I spoke to my bank manager just the other day and I suppose I probably should buy another property but instead I'm going to by a new plasma, play station, couch and new golf clubs. Oh well lol. Maybe even a motorbike or a wave runner. I'm even waking most mornings with a chuckle and I'm not a morning person.

Geez I hope I'm not going through a mid-life crisis. :)))

The only problem I can see is that I need to address a whole new set of moral and ethical values.

Maybe I'm growing "down" instead of up.

amber:

Good, hard, wood down here my friend. :))))

Hi lovely Jen:

I have it on fairly good authority that he is actually quite a nice guy face to face. Blogs may be a different matter but oh well.

Enjoy your day everybody.

xxx

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 30, 2009 1:00 PM

waterflambe at January 29, 2009 7:39 PM
I made a request of you a while ago to show your profile and me your photo. You told me to rack off.
It's incongruous (but understandable), that on the one hand you will suck my thumb publicly on Boronia Peak for a reptile behaviour interpretation, but on the other, as per your post the other night, query the whole basis of any understanding I might have about animal behaviour.
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 30, 2009 12:07 PM

Very out of topic - our forecast here next week goes from this week's 44 degrees, to 45, 47, and 50 on Wednesday. We (at work) are having a terrible job trying to convince the elderly to turn their air conditioners on. They say its too expensive to run. My sister, also in a health related industry is having the same problem in SA.

In SA, all public buildings are open for people to come and spend the day in air conditioning.

Posted by: willow29 at January 30, 2009 11:34 AM

Colleen, sorry to hear about your job.Maybe it is, as you say good riddence? Frees you up for more important things :) (mortgage, what mortgage?)

MAD - lovely story - had tears in my eyes.

TD - what can I say! :)

Marcus - cant' help smiling at some of your posts.

Posted by: willow29 at January 30, 2009 11:07 AM

The thing is Marcus I have had so much personal 'evidence' on my hocus pocus as you call it by way of personal experience I don't need any scientist to verify 'my' findings. Though I'm pretty sure still in my library of books I do have some books with scientific tests done maybe even written by scientists. From memory I think there were scientific tests done on Edgar Cayce but I can't get to my books at the moment with stuff I am doing at home.

Oh, I was moderated out last night. But if you youtube - have a look at "V aliens exposed". I do think you would have loved that show. It has all you need. Reptiles, women, reptiles within womens bodies, sex, reptilian babies. lol. I do remember loving the show when it was on. Must have been mid eighties I think.

Have a good day. Oh, and lots and lots of little skinks (is that their name) around my place. They are obviously loving the weather. Everytime you walk outside they skuttle off everywhere. I love that.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 30, 2009 10:53 AM

Posted by: waterbombe at January 29, 2009 9:01 PM

thanks for that waterbombe...will try that.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 30, 2009 9:22 AM

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 29, 2009 11:17 PM

Thanks for that Amber.

I am not worried and in some ways happy to not be spending my day doing something I mostly did not enjoy.

I have a friend who works with profoundly disabled young people. He gets enormous joy from those people so I might look in that direction again.

Anyway, for the next couple of weeks I will be doing my share of driving my brother to his radiotheraphy.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 30, 2009 9:14 AM

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 10:55 PM

funny that, the same thing happens to women over 50.

Where too go from from there???? .......don't you mean "way to go".

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 30, 2009 9:09 AM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 29, 2009 10:15 PM

What ad?

It really is just a matter of turning the sound down, but I listen to music all the time....and forget.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 30, 2009 9:04 AM

I love balsamic vinegar, especially the white which I use almost every day. Also love the balsamic glaze which is used often when we barbecue, adds such a special flavour to food and makes something quite ordinary into something quite special. Can anyone think of a good gift to give to a 30 year old male which is very practically minded, can cook and loves his home. Also a very hard worker and a really good bloke, though not a blokey ocker type. It is to be a birthday present and don't have a clue what to get.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 30, 2009 9:02 AM

And what if the stove isn't the latest model, with a ceramic hotplate on show? What if it's got a few chips in the enamel? Posted by: timewarp1 at January 29, 2009 10:54 PM

Yes, I agree, and I also think any bloke over 40 who asks himself this question ought to take a VERY hard look in the mirror at himself. With his spectacles ON.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 30, 2009 8:54 AM

Colleen, what a terrible shame you lost your job. What will you do..is there any other work around for you?

If you come to Melb in March, I'd love to meet up. My profile is actually called waterbomber with an r , but you could also end an email to Auntykaz or Deco and maybe we could organise a few people for lunch?

TW, I forgot to say...I loved the dessert analogy...very funny. But I might be confused about who Ducksmuggler is?

Posted by: waterbombe at January 30, 2009 8:51 AM

TW, I was using the bun as a different metaphor to the usual...think about it...the bun I was talking about encloses the frankfurter. I'm very visual/spatial.

Lynath, don't you have rights at work about all those dogs...I wouldn't want to put up with them either. I'm not a fan of dogs (except a few that I really like, usually well-trained Labs and German Shepherds and some of those small dogs as long as they are not yappy).

Sounds like your workmate dog lovers need to realise that non-dog lovers are not evil...we don't all have to have the same passions in life. Dogs can be noisy and smelly, and some behave unpredictably. Unless you work at the RSPA, I'd be getting OH&S in. But then I suppose the dog lovers would freeze you out. Can you give OH&S an anonymous phone call from an unmarked phone box?

Posted by: waterbombe at January 30, 2009 8:45 AM

Jen. You are absolutely right to regurgitate the truism; "What you fear you attract".
You admit you prefer feeling, emotion and unsubstantiable hocus pocus and by inference, dismiss and fear logic, evidence and rationalism.
So, accordingly you therefore 'attract' and are surrounded by logic and evidence in the form of scientifically based tecnology and highly rational institutions and systems that function effectively to keep you safe, healthy and happy.
Just as well you don't ascribe behaviour and events to anything sensible.
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 30, 2009 4:45 AM

poochesinperthJanuary 29, 2009 9:58 AM
Snookum Wookums of all species have been bred by people with an eye to what they want. The Americans are even doing it with our aussie Bearded dragon lizards- and pythons, creating color 'morphs'. I posted something in one of the dog blogs last year about Arctic foxes. In a famous experiment a Russian researcher took some of these normally very wary, erect tailed, prick eared winter white canids and selectively bred for human friendly characteristics- characteristics like a droopy tail and ears and a coloration that we find non threatening, like white faces (rather than black). He also bred for traits that made the foxes friendly and tolerating of us.
In 20 generations, about 20 years, he had foxes that to all intents and purposes looked and behaved like Border collies.

The major problem point about cats is that they revert to type very quickly when left to their devices in the wild. Australia has a big population of feral cats that have quickly evolved into ruthless predators. The snookum wookums mostly die but the cats with great hunting abilities, the ability to endure, to be disease resistant succesful breeders prosper. Some feral (and domestic) cats are distant hybrids of larger felines that we would not recognise as familiar moggies but things more akin to small leopards and these traits reappear in the wild. Much greater size, and neck/head muscularity are obvious changes. Recently the normally spineless Federal Environment minister Peter Garrett rejected applications for import and sale/breeding of Servals which are twice the size of house cats and capable of tackling wallabies and many other larger marsupials, reptiles and birds and doubtless various domesticated animals.
So, yeah, dump, starve and dehydrate a snookum wookum and see what it does when confronted with a bird or lizard or marsupial hopping mouse and a need for food.

Lynathdeary. You will have to educate me on the fine points of Balsamic appreciation.

No need to ask my opinion of dog fashion, or rather the perpetrators though. What do you expect though from people, cultists, who routinely breed animals purely for their 'cute' deformities? British buldogs cannot even give birth naturally or breathe properly because of fashion fads. Pekinese pop their eyeballs if hit on the head. Great survival traits. Most dog breeds look like ugly, inefficient mutants compared to their progenitor, the Asiatic Wolf, which, incidentally, is reckoned to be more intelligent than any of the breeds.
I mentioned felines to Perth. There is a race that prowls the streets, bars and clubs (but seldom bookshops, galleries and museums) Queenan might want to examine in counterpoise. These are the Orange Cougars, often bejowled, carroty colored, crepe skinned female predators known to come hard at, even seize and drag off male Gen X'ers or even the younger Gen Txt'ers in order to mate with them. Tee hee hee, lollerz, OMG.
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 30, 2009 4:22 AM

At least Marcus gets reactions when he drones on and on but TW drones on and on about the same sort of thing and everyone ignores it.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 30, 2009 1:02 AM

I think Marcus just gets bored at times and likes to give a bit of a stir lectures on and on with the hope that someday someone will 'get it'. I think he likes the reactions as well. I prefer it when Marcus is talking about lizards and insects and things in general. He comes across to me as rather an introverted person by nature, a bit of a loner and I think he would have a lot of women friends as he would be trustworthy and honest. I may be wrong, but that's just what I think. Some of the posts do get very tedious at times on here and go over and over the same thing and I think he likes to stir the pot a little.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 30, 2009 1:01 AM

Posted by: iaminperth at January 29, 2009 10:24 AM

Here is another dog hero story It appeared in our local newspaper. It was also on GWN TV all over regional Western Australia:

A man was walking through his kitchen when slipped on a ball bearing from one of his childrens toys, fell heavily and knoocked himself out. When he came to he couldn't move. No one else was home.

He called out as loudly as he could but no one came.Suddenly there was a huge banging as his Rottweiler bitch squeezed herself through the small cat flap in the rear security door. The his faithful dog was there beside him frantically trying to revive him.

Somehow, the man doesn't remember exactly how because he was more unconcious than not, the dog helped him up. Unable to locate the phone and by chance standing next the the key rack, he grabbed the car keys and his dog half carried half dragged him to the car which was parked about 50 metres away up a steeply sloping driveway.

The man then drove the car at not much more than walking pace to the hospital which fortunately was not far away. All the way to the hospital the Rottie kept nudging the semi concious man to keep him awake.

When they got to the hospital the man was taken inside, put on a trolley, had a neck collar put on and surrounded with sandbags. He was then told not to move if he ever wanted to walk again.

Several hours later after CAT Scans and all sorts of tests he was told than no his neck wasn't broken.

Whle all this was going on the faithful dog waited quietly by the door of the hospital refusing to budge.

How do I know this story is true. Well I was the man and the dog is my Velvet.

Velvet is the same dog my youngest uses as a bed and until he got too big used to climb on her back and ride her around the yard.

Velvet is a typical Rottweiler, in fact a winner of a National Medallion in Conformation and a trained stock dog. YOu can see her on my profile.

Rottweielrs are not the vicous killer the media likes to portray. There is no better family pet than a well socialised and trained Rottweiler. They have been bred to live in the house with the family for centuries.

If you were bitten by one of my dogs it would more likely be the Miniature Pinscher. She is a nasty little bitch when she chooses to be. Velvet the Rottie is a sweetie.

MAD

Posted by: makeadifference1 at January 30, 2009 12:45 AM

and all of a sudden the twenty year old's suddenly start coming out of the wood-work.

Where too go from from there????

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 10:55 PM

repeat after me: Life spins out of control when middle aged men refuse to accept that they are no longer 20

Unless the twentyyears olds coming out of the wood are wine then you don't make a fool of yourself...

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 30, 2009 12:38 AM

Oh yes Jenniferhi, that is what I have been telling you. .what you fear you attract.....I attracted a couple of thousand men with dogs.
Does this mean that if I embrace the fear and the fleas I will attract only men who love cats or have no pets(but don't mind yours)?

Featherless could you please check my logic for errors. If you say it is okay then I shall start the New Year fearing many more things. A complete phobia about winning the lottery and a morbid fear of overseas holidays to start with...

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 30, 2009 12:22 AM

Jen @ 11:04 PM.
Well, that would certainly explain the number of Huntsman spiders who just 'jump' at any opportunity to 'drop in' to my place!

Tassie,
sounds like you have some very interesting woodwork down your way!

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 29, 2009 11:59 PM

I'm petrified of sharks Lynath and I know its irrational but i have a real horror that one is going to bite me so I don't go into the ocean. i have a pool in the backyard so that fixes that problem if I wish to have a swim. I know it is a totally irrational fear but it is there and I don't really feel a need to face it as it doesn't impact on my life too much. Statistically there is far more danger in walking down the street or driving a car but there you go. It's a bit like plane crashes, apparently you have more chance of being crushed by a stampeding donkey than crashing in a plane, however, when that plane gets the rattles, it's a bit scarey at times.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 29, 2009 11:35 PM

TD, I think Willow does!
Just lightening things up a bit?

TD & Jen, I think the clincher may be the lack of any real empathy.

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 29, 2009 11:24 PM

Was just thinking Marcus must have really loved that TV serious many moons ago "V" I think it was called. About the reptilian aliens who landed on earth. Covered in a cloak of human looks that could be peeled off.

Remember seeing Dana Delaney I think it was as one of the main characters downing a rat.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 29, 2009 11:24 PM

I am so sorry to hear that Colleen, there will be a lot of peope hurt, before this global recession/depression thing is over.

I was thinking the other day that the most secure job (but the most crappy pay!) these days, is probably aged care really.
If many mums lose their jobs, there won't be so much work for child-carers, but we are all going to get older, aren't we?

Hope things look up for you quickly.
Take care.

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 29, 2009 11:17 PM

Hey Colleen, Eat your words !!! I have owned five german shepherds and my dogs have always been complemented on their good manners and open friendly natures. My big male was part of a programme to show little children how not to be afraid to dogs but to respect them and understand them. My female at present is beautifully obedient, doesn't bark and fits into our family beautifully. We did puppy training, junior dog training, advanced training and trialling. I believe in discipline and kindness and also believe in having a pet fit in with the set up of the family. I know you weren't aiming at me, but my dog is not my baby, she is my companion and friend and I am the boss!

Posted by: iaminperth at January 29, 2009 11:16 PM

Lynath ~ Surely you would know of the truism "What you fear you attract"?

Seems it is playing out in your life.

It is so true... what we focus our thoughts and attention on we draw into our life. In your case, obviously dogs.

So go the other route.... "Feel the fear and do it anyway." (Great book by the way.)

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 29, 2009 11:04 PM

"It could be that he just delights in the reactions he causes by haranging us with his ethological beliefs." - me,January 28, 2009 12:37 AM

Though I have wondered similarly as -Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 7:42 PM

Posted by: aquamanda56 at January 29, 2009 10:59 PM

The problem is lynath when the male body reaches forty something and all of a sudden the twenty year old's suddenly start coming out of the wood-work.

Where too go from from there????

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 10:55 PM

WB at 7.15 pm: Oh dear oh dear. I don't think metaphor is your forte. Let's try to be a bit more robust here. I associate vienna franks with Budgiesmuggler Man. Wrong bloke, if you're talking about our beloved reptile fancier.

With Ducksmuggler Man it's got to be at least a rolled pork roast in a stocking. And the aim is to get it into the OVEN and nicely cooked, so you get something to make gravy out of.

WB, buns in the oven are something altogether different. Nowadays an optional second course to the meal.

Ducksmuggler man is in two minds about that second course. His primitive instinctive mind believes in getting as much as you can, in case it's your last meal for a long long time or ever, so he's happy about dessert being included. Especially sweet little buns.

His modern sophisticated mind thinks rather differently. Able to look much further ahead, it realises that the "main course" is actually only an inexpensive entree (however you spell that.)

The really high-cost item on the menu is the dessert. So he goes on a strict diet of entrees only, in the hope of keeping everyone slim. Except his wallet.

But you are dead right WB about the intelligent common sense of selecting post-menopausal ovens. At least as hot, and not still into cooking pastries. So they can focus undistracted on doing a roast to a turn. Practice makes perfect, hey?

And what if the stove isn't the latest model, with a ceramic hotplate on show? What if it's got a few chips in the enamel? To me a stove is to cook. Not to brag about and show off to the neighbours. That's a bloke's new $3000 six-burner BBQ, hey?

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 29, 2009 10:54 PM

OMG willow. :))))

You have no idea do you?

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 10:50 PM

Posted by: waterbombe at January 29, 2009 9:11 PM

my ghecko experience. For a minute there, I really thought the bloody thing was going to run off with my bloke,

proof everywhere.... the trilogy marcus/sex/lizards....

ps maybe it was turning ot listen?

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 29, 2009 10:30 PM

So let's get a bit more of that quick tongue-flicking reptilian action happening on here. I'm up for it.

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 29, 2009 8:37 PM

I rest my case.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 29, 2009 10:21 PM

Religion, Featherless , Religion Hocus Pocus and Feminism and FWB are other favourite topics ..you see, the thing is that they all elicit responses which is the fun bit for most bloggers.-I think,
Each time the topic rolls around something new often comes out of it and so it continues.
In all cases sooner or later the topic is related or connected to sex and/or lizards. What would the psych team make of that I wonder?

Waterbombe re: the genetic irrelevancy issue- my latest read, by Joe Queenan, examines this by comparing current society (and in a microcosm RSVP) to the world of Ancient Greek Mythology "The Illiad, stripped to its core ,is a story about a pouty Gen X-er(Paris) who purloins a Baby Boomers wife (Helen...she was definitely a thousandship) and brings his entire civilization collapsing down around him because of his impudence But none of this would have happened if the Baby Boomer (Menelaus /Marcus) had married someone his own age and accepted that he was no longer a stud"
He goes on to say:
"Life spins out of control when middle aged men refuse to accept that they are no longer twenty " .....or even 40 in these modern times (Genetically irrelevant men ....apparently ) Helen as the older woman/ younger man trailblazer actually had no say in the purloining.... but she was pleased all the same....her name sake Helen Reddy wrote about it later "Look how much I've lost but look how much I 've gained....baby!
But I digress...
He then says:" The male Baby Boomers eighty year adolescence would pave the way for such horrors as the senior mohawk, the wall street ponytail and the geriatric reversed baseball cap with matching earring"

Coincidentally, along with dogs(and the occasional bird) those are all attributes in a man that are not on my list of ideals....

I am not afraid of lizards.

For those of you who believe in Karma I should say that I am forced on a regular basis into an office which seems to be overrun with dogs. One of the main players rescues dogs and then lets them loose to roam at will in the work place, and in addition all the dog lovers also bring in their various hounds. Strangely enough most of the rescued dogs are the little fluffyball types which can be passed off almost as a cat so they are alright if they keep their distance! It is also reassuring that they usually have giant cones around their necks or are on crutches or in wheelchairs or something...

Now Marcus which Balsamic would you choose for the hiccups cure. l'aceto di Modena or l'aceto di Reggio?

In Britain the RSPCA put people in prison for dressing up dogs. As Baby Boomer Pontificators what is your opinion of this practice of dressing up animals.?

Colleen are you copying your work prior to pushing the send button?.(Left mouse hold and highlight then right mouse select copy) It is worth it to do it each time because nearly everyone has to sign in at least twice before getting through. What ad are yo talking about?

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 29, 2009 10:15 PM

FB
What r u on about. If I'm in a burning building the last thing I will be is thinking about hypothesis.
Then again I may never know. ?????

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 10:03 PM

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 29, 2009 8:37 PM
Very droll, FB. Lol.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 29, 2009 9:55 PM

Waterbombe ~ Your little story about the lizard just beautiful. Moments like that are so special.

We all need to take the time to appreciate little things like that. Everything doesn't have to be so fast-paced that we miss special gifts that are given.

I see things like that as proof of a greater power. I know you won't see that of course but it doesn't really matter.

I also believe that when we do acknowledge and appreciate these little wonders that greater things are given to us.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 29, 2009 9:47 PM

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 7:42 PM

"If I didn't know better I would say he suffers from some sort of obsessive compulsive disorder. Maybe even a little Aspergic."

hmmmm. Why do you say "If I didn't know better" Rod? Have you two met now?

I have thought the Aspie thing too. Having close connections and understanding a bit about it.

Me pondering now. hmmmmm.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 29, 2009 9:43 PM

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 29, 2009 8:37 PM

"So let's get a bit more of that quick tongue-flicking reptilian action happening on here. I'm up for it."

Goodness FB, seems you could be onto a whole new approach in the 'marketing' of yourself. lol.

Sorry, just had to comment. Loved it! lol.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 29, 2009 9:38 PM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 29, 2009 8:02 PM

Question.....Why would you save it.....so that you can go back and re read it and tell yourself how well constructed and intelligent your posts are..

no no mine are not that precious babe.....

but thanks for the advice on shutting down......I do shut down every night.... and sometimes have trouble rebooting....so will take your advice on that.

If I come to Melbourne in March, which may not happen as I lost my job on Tuesday along with all the other casual and contract staff at medicare australia .....please please please put on your levis and budgie smuggles and lets go for a dip at Middle Park....

Colleen.

Posted by: fifilafume at January 29, 2009 9:23 PM

Kenny and Rod - ty xxxx
For me it's definately a case of love me, love my dogs. Even though I understand that one of them isnt very lovable, a fellow that didnt accept them can just keep looking. Just as I'd accept his dog, cat, ferret, guinea pig, snake....

Posted by: willow29 at January 29, 2009 9:15 PM

Lizards are pretty interesting, FB, I know where you're coming from.

I'm waiting for an informed opinion on my ghecko experience. For a minute there, I really thought the bloody thing was going to run off with my bloke, it looked so interested in him. If I'd seen it doing any of that quick tongue-flicking reptilian action I'd have had a stern word with it.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 29, 2009 9:11 PM

Perth, my ridgeback / staffy Zack is a beautiful boy, a sooky lala at times, but at others the protector of his loving auntykaz.
Easy peasy to train, a loyal and faithful boy, and l love him to pieces.......
My labrador Milly is a beautiful cream girl, silly as a hat, but sooo cute.
I would not be without either. A dog is for life, not just for Christmas........
I could not imagine my life without them......K

Posted by: auntykaz at January 29, 2009 9:09 PM

Fifi, click the "remember me?" box next time you post. The RSVP site will insert a cookie into your computer and it will remember you for ever. (Well, until you delete all cookies). I think this is how my tekky friend said it works, anyway...but whatever, it does work.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 29, 2009 9:01 PM

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 7:42 PM:

Well, if you are ever in a burning building together, you should ask him about ethology. If he pauses to give you a lengthy explanation, then your hypothesis is correct.

Of course, you won't be able to report this to anyone, because you will be burned to a cinder yourself, but them's the breaks, I guess.

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 29, 2009 8:53 PM

Posted by: waterbombe at January 29, 2009 7:39 PM:

Really? I haven't heard much about lizards. Maybe he could work on changing the ratio a bit. I never thought I'd say this, but, really, if those are the options presented to me, then I am quite keen to hear more about lizards. Especially as it's so hot; seems the perfect timing.

So let's get a bit more of that quick tongue-flicking reptilian action happening on here. I'm up for it.

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 29, 2009 8:37 PM

fifi January 29, 2009 1:15 AM
No.
Thoughtful, well constructed intelligent posters usually save their contributions on an email page.
If you are shutting down your machine nightly and rebooting try leaving it on for easier access.
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 29, 2009 8:02 PM

Hi there all you prolific bloggers. How do you keep up the pace? Away for a few days and about a 150 entries to catch up on! I think I'll stick with the geeks,(much more manageable in the heatwave) only 4 posts since January 13, and yes two of them are mine, one from heart2heart, and no one since January 21st. I guess they are all busy playing with their gadgets. that's all have to get back to my apple mac.

Have fun

Posted by: ccfriend2008 at January 29, 2009 7:54 PM

Willow:

I think you could raise a head or two. :)

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 7:46 PM

FB

He has been preaching this sort of thing for a long time now.

If I didn't know better I would say he suffers from some sort of obsessive compulsive disorder. Maybe even a little Aspergic.

Like i said, "if I didn't know better".

:))))

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 7:42 PM

You're right, FB, it's always been that way. It is constantly repeated topic. And just FYI, the other 10% of his posts are on lizards.

Which reminds me. Marcusses. I was on the top of Mt Boronia in the Grampians the other day, about 800m up, where there are not a lot of people, usually, although there are always some, I guess. I sat down to have lunch and some very friendly gheckos arrived. They were small, about the size of my index finger head-to-tail. One was eyeing up my apple, so I took a very small piece and held it out and he approached and sat there eating out of my hand. I heard the apple crunching just like it does when I eat it; it was pretty sweet, actually. The ghecko finished and was heading off when my partner arrived. He stood about 30cms away. The ghecko must have heard him and it turned and looked at him over its shoulder...it was an intense look. It kept looking at him over its shoulder for a while as if it was very curious, then it gave up and ran off. Now I might be anthropomorphising all over the place, but what was going on with that tiny ghecko? Do they normally eat out of your hand while you hold the food? And could it see my partner? I mean, he's enormous compared to it: I'd be surprised if it had the eye sight to see a whole human being. I thought they would have used their sense of smell rather than eyesight. And yet it kept looking at him over its shoulder. Of course he's very attractive, but I don't think the ghecko would have cottoned on. Would you know what was going on?

Posted by: waterbombe at January 29, 2009 7:39 PM

Oh and by the way I have a cat.

He is my best friend. He waits in the drive way for me to get home. He comes when he is called and he is the most loyal cat I have ever known. More like a dog than a cat.

He does piss me off sometimes when he claws at my pillow in the middle of the night and of course there is the occasional mouse and the obligatory feathers in the back yard.

I'll forgive him his little indiscretions for when he sits there with his front paws tightly together and his tail wrapped around them he just looks so regal. He is the king of his own world just like his master. He is pitch black and his name is Tinny, but that is another story.

xxx

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 7:36 PM

TW, that was an insightful post. Fortunately, plenty of older men welcome a "genetically irrelevant" (ha ha) woman. They select women who have already had children and don't want any more. Sure, a younger woman might be in better shape, (maybe), but she might get pregnant and then they are stuck with raising yet another family. It's the woman's fertility that puts them off her. Many men make rational informed choices to partner a post menopausal woman in order to avoid becoming a parent.They have adjusted to the reality of DNA testing and child maintenance and realise there is no such thing as a free frankfurter any longer.

However, that realisation seems to drive a few men crazy. "Freedom for Frankfurters" is their ewar cry. If I could move from a smallgoods to a baking analogy, what p**sses them is that the bun is no longer freely available to the frankfurter. Not only that, but the bun is speaking up. Hot dogs are off the menu unless the bun agrees to the deal. This is not at all what your cave man experienced. Hence the development of ethology; it is simply a frankfurter-bun-hotdog scenario with a bit of dressing; and in some cases, such as Marcus', the dressing is mustard.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 29, 2009 7:15 PM

I haven't been on these blogs that long, but one question has been popping up in my head recently. Nothing much hangs on the answer, other than the satisfaction of my own (currently overheated) curiosity?

Well over 90% of Marcus' posts on here are to do with the evolutionary basis of attraction and related issues.

I mean, it's nice he has an intellectual interest and all, but is this just a recent thing, or has this been his subject of choice for a lot longer than I've been on here?

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 29, 2009 6:54 PM

Bad Boyz :)

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 29, 2009 6:40 PM

When we go walking, I know its him that turns the heads, not me.willow29 @2.50pm
How do you know willow? do the heads belong to little old ladies?Don't be so modest
kenny

Posted by: tallerthantom at January 29, 2009 6:07 PM

Perth, I do agree. And what a great dog Gracie is! Its fabulous to hear things like that. I was training Tickety-boo to be a Community Companion dog but might have to skip this year. He is a Border Collie x - not only loyal, but absolutely gorgeous. When we go walking, I know its him that turns the heads, not me.

I offered to take the miniature pony to the nursing homes but they werent keen. Shame, she's a lovely placid creature.

Posted by: willow29 at January 29, 2009 2:50 PM

The statistics don't lie. Cats kill by instinct and dogs bred for a purpose ie: Rotties may seem placid but can easy become vicious without provocation and do serious injury to the innocent. How often have we heard that a family pet, often a rottie, who wouldn't hurt a fly, has savaged a member of 'it's' family. i do own a large dog by the way so am not a dog hater. As for cats, that's another story.

Posted by: asitis09 at January 29, 2009 2:42 PM

Oh nooooo please tell me H2H that you have not done a complete backflip like Tassie and no more Mr Nice guy! Please reassure me that there are some nice genuine guys on here - you always seemed that way to me (from what I read anyway) - whats up - who's upset you?

Posted by: lovetolaugh57 at January 29, 2009 1:42 PM

Actually Deco I didn't see the 10.53 comment as snippy at all...just a statement of absolute fact.
I don't mind cats in the house at all as long as it's your house and not mine.
I have had cats all my life but when I moved from my farm to the Gold Coast and now living in a unit on my own I couldn't and didn't want to take Puss with me.
Puss now resides with my son in Melbourne and has adapted to the indoor life splendidly.....the lord of the manor spends most of his day motionless on the couch....typical male apparently
Kenny

Posted by: tallerthantom at January 29, 2009 1:37 PM

I can't keep out of this one any longer. Here's my scientific take on losing love and trying again (and again):

Ducksmuggler Man tries to convince every current date in turn that it is unavoidable male destiny to spend his half-century-plus of fecund life, tirelessly searching for the most desirable female to mate with, to prove to her by deeds not words that she's the one. So how about it, eh?

He doesn't mention that his actual unavoidable instinctive real purpose is to plant a couple of gallons of seed in every single fertile-looking field that he ever wanders past.

Hey, that wouldn't gel at all with his conscious wish to use contraception every time, in these unforgiving days of DNA-testing and enforced child-maintenance payments. (Which is in conflict with his instinctive wish that the contraception will fail, so that his only biological purpose will be achieved.)

A lot of sex-starved women go for flattery that has a whiff of science, so they both get lucky often enough to reinforce their behaviours.

Good on them, I say. if it makes them feel good about themselves, even if only at the time.

What intrigues me is Ducksmuggler Man's strident aversion to to post-menopausal women. Several hypotheses:

* His instincts tell him they are no use to prolong his line, so steer him off them.

* He has bought the advertising-led denigration of every sign that youth is fading, and most post-menopausal women do lack some of the visual youthfulness that has so much appeal in this superficial age.

* He is himself is getting to an age where fewer fecund young things will buy his produce, and he's projecting his frustration about that onto the group he will soon have to turn to, to indulge his conscious self. (At the cost of his instinctive self castigating him for wasting his seed in barren ground, to maintain the biblical reference.)

Anyone got further hypotheses?

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 29, 2009 12:48 PM

"Of course in our selfish society where some people discard spouses who have become inconvenient, what hope have the poor pets got?" Posted by MAD at 7:54 PM.

Actually, Gary, I think the pets may often have a better chance. Haven't seen statistics, but a lot of people who now see a romantic partner as expendable, don't think the same way about their beloved pet(s).

And I don't see it as a problem on RSVP. When I look at a new profile I begin by checking for my personal VETO factors - wants someone very different from me, admits to drinking 'regularly' (read 'heavily') or being only separated, lives too far away, writes primary-school sentences or dislikes pets. Next!

So for this RSVP member, it never becomes a problem down the track.

PS: Welcome back Tony, muscular as ever.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 29, 2009 11:38 AM

waterbombe at 7:44 PM: Maybe you're not completely right about the "hundreds" person, whether it's Perthie accusing me of porkies, or me honestly reporting my personal statistics. No humour involved there.

Hey, 175 in 3 years is only just over one first-meeting a week! I miss a few weeks (a month when I broke my ribs) but make up with 2 a week fairly often.

One week I had four, but that proved to be too much - eleven hours concentrating hard on meaningful conversations. At the end of the week I couldn't even remember who had how many kids, let alone grandkids. So I had the next week off, to clear out my mind.

Different people have different energy levels and different levels of motivation. I've always been comfortable with the life-observer class of people seeing me as an over-energetic / try-hard extremist. As it says in my profile, I do things, not watch.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 29, 2009 10:53 AM

Hey Mad, Before you get your knickers in a twist I know that Rotties are real pussy cats. In fact a large male visits on a regular basis and stays for the day now and then. There were a number of Rotties in the obedience classes we attended and they were all big pussy cats, very affectionate and very friendly. The dobies I found a little offhand but then I have never owned one. The ridgebacks i found lovely but very flighty and more difficult to respond to training. The Rotties and the shepherds, however seemed to bond instantly and have the same level of understanding and intelligence. I have to say though and hate to do it, but the rottie was the more athletic which surprised me as I thought with their weight they wouldn't be. I nearly purchased a rottie but then I have always owned german shepherds and know the breed well. I see that the german shepherds are now being used as the rescue dogs instead of st. bernards and, of course, rotties and german shepherds are excelling as care dogs worldwide. Shepherds are also proving to be the best seeing eye dogs in Europe. I think part of it is their strong devotion to their owners. Gracie the care dog rottie saved her owners life after a seizure when she held her paw on the specially designed phone for 3 seconds and then barked when the operator answered. The operator then despatched the paramedics and Gracie turned the special key in the lock to let them in and went and lay next to her unconscious owner as trained whilst the paramedics worked. The owner was transported to hospital and recovered completely. Gracie won a medal and a new toy and went back to doing her job happily looking after her owner. There are heaps of stories of the care dogs working in the community but unfortunately a lot of people only focus on the negative. If you look at most dog attacks very few are by pure bred dogs and most are owned by totally irresponsible owners. I think the most vicious savage little horrors are these yappy fluffy white things that owners think should have free run of everywhere. They are aggressive and don't think anything of latching onto a larger dog. Of course, if the larger one growls or barks then it is a dog attack. The stupid thing about it is a gsd or a rottie or any of the larger breeds had actually attacked there would be damage done to the little dog, but there rarely is.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 29, 2009 10:24 AM

Posted by: heart2heart57 at January 28, 2009 11:53 PM

Absolutely agree with your heart2heart.

I have a cat and as a bit of a loner myself, I prefer the independent nature of a cat to that of the submissive pack mentality of the dog.

My lap is the owned by babies and occassionally a man's head.....

I will also add that I have rarely seen a female dog owner who knows how to take the role of leader of the pack with her dog or dogs. Consequently a yapping out of control dog who things he is pack leader. Also too many men who resort to cruelty to control dogs.

Anyway, don;t know why but I continued to be moderated off the page.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 29, 2009 10:15 AM

True Amber. I have met a couple of people who clearly don't like animals, even after stating that they do. It's a ridiculous situation for both and you can feel the tension all the time. I don't like people who tell lies anyway. There is absolutely nothing wrong with not liking animals but if you are thinking of forming a partnership with someone who does, then you need to very quickly learn to like them or walk away in my opinion. I think that more than about the animals in the situation it is about the lifestyle and an animal lover will always gravitate to an animal in need. I know in our household we have our permanent ones and then every now and then another will come and go. Can't help it, that's just who the person is and wouldn't want to or have to try to change for anyone. I have a very good friend who has no animals because he works long hours and doesn't feel it's fair so when he stays over at our house he has a wonderful time with ours and is amazed by their acceptance and affection. Caught him twice now napping on the couch in front of the TV with my dog napping next to him, oh well such is life. I don't know which one of them looked the most shocked when I came home !

Posted by: iaminperth at January 29, 2009 10:07 AM

Not true h2h. According to veterinary science there seems to be a breed of cat almost emerging within the breed of snookum wookums as you like to call them. Apparently, because of the intensive breeding of the common cat there are some species where the hunting instinct has been bred out and you are ending up with a snookum wookum. We have two cats and neither are hunters, in fact our male cat rarely goes out the house. He did have an encounter once with a bird which was attacked by another bird over our courtyard and was mortified when it fell out of the sky in a flurry of feathers. The female socialises with most of the people in the culdesac where I live and could easily chomp on a bird which lives outside my bedroom window. She prefers to lay around on my bed or go visiting the neighbours. neither are the slightest bit interested in hunting. We also have Boofer visiting each night for his fruit and nuts and they don't bother with him either. i found it an interesting theory and would like to learn more about it. I still think though that responsible ownership of any animals is the key and we need a lot more education in that area. Compulsory desexing off all pets should be on the agenda also and unless they pass stringent tests should never be accepted for breeding. I think those rules would also be good for human beings in some cases.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 29, 2009 9:58 AM

heart2heart57.
Swamp sounds filled with foreboding old son.There is love and affection to be had, believe me. Anyway seems like you've been lurking and are now back in. Wetland is more appropriate terminology. They are wonderful habitats for all sorts of creatures and perform important ecological functions.

I visited the urban wetland and White's Skink habitat in Royal Park west again on monday. This is part of the great urban bushland project that stretches from the Royal Children's Hospital to the Zoo precinct and then over and down to the Tulla Freeway and almost to what was the Commonwealth Games village. The lizard habitat is literally an old dumping ground for a lot of heavy concrete building debris. The rock loving skinks had colonised the area as old habitat was lost to building. It was realised that if it was cleaned up, what is probably the last metropolitan population of these reptiles would be lost.

Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 29, 2009 9:26 AM

Posted by: heart2heart57 @
January 28, 2009 10:13 PM
January 28, 2009 10:53 PM

Two very snippy little comments there, T.

Perhaps you could clarify who you're aiming them at? Reminds me of last year's blog topic 'Say what you mean & mean what you say'..

Deco

Posted by: decoratress at January 29, 2009 8:54 AM

Posted by laughsandtalks at January 28, 2009 8:15

What is absolutely frustating is spending the morning attempting to log on to this blog .... at least three times and having to suffer the interminable advertisement.....all the way through each time....then carefully composing a response to a post or two, posting them...being thanked for posting, rushing off to work only to find on returning home that your thoughtful, well constructed intelligent post has been lost in rsvp's trash can never to see the light of day.....

So my question is Marcus....do you moonlight as a moderator?

Colleen.

Posted by: fifilafume at January 29, 2009 1:15 AM

Yes Jen, that's the point i think. Our casual ethologist must always test the benefits before down grading the deal. Over ten years that must be some list! Shame they aren't on your profile Marcus - long term, no short term, no FWB wanted excluding ... deal breakers :)) Mmm now why are you here exactly?

Posted by: wistfuldeb at January 29, 2009 12:23 AM

Cats are supposed to be OUTSIDE - where they can hunt and kill. Sometimes for food, often for pleasure (an innate instinct particularly in the Feline species of the animal kingdom). If humans want to make them all fuffy-wuffy and hang bells off their necks and lock them inside, then so be it. But a cat - any cat - is a killing machine. By design. And no amount of snookum-wookums is going to change that. If you have any doubts, leave a goldfish bowl unattended for a day. Or let your pet mouse out of it's cage for more less than a minute. We'll see how much ingraining the City-Life has over-ruled their basic instinct...

Posted by: heart2heart57 at January 28, 2009 11:53 PM

To be honest Jen,
I think that for most people who love their animals, they wouldn't even bother getting together with someone who didn't like animals in the first place.
I would be worried that if they really didn't like animals, they may be cruel to them when you weren't around.
We have all heard of horror stories of people who injured or even killed a pet, because they didn't like it or were jealous of it.

I agree with ISTJ, if you are so afraid of dogs, why put yourself through the grief?
I'm not a big fan of aggressive breeds like Rottweilers and Pit-Bulls either!
I am sure there are plenty of men (or women) who have made the life-style choice of not wanting to have a pet (and the associated worry of needing to find care for your pet or a "pet-friendly" place to stay if you want to go on a holiday)

I think most men would appreciate ISTJ's straight-up honesty.
There is nothing worse than someone who 'pretends' to like the same things you do just to get you interested in them, and then expects you to change to suit them!

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 28, 2009 11:52 PM

So what causes the 'too little carbon dioxide
or the constriction of a diaphragm. I wasn't doing anything different than I normally do but just started rythmically hiccupping, went on for ages.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 28, 2009 11:36 PM

Deco.
Jury is out on the causes of hiccups but the connection with the diapragm which causes the spasm as it contracts is through the vagus nerve which apparently gets a little rythmic brain programme going. You can defeat the reflex by overstimulating the vagus so it 'forgets' the hiccups. Sweet on the back of the tongue or perhaps what you suggest with vinegar (a nice Balsamic pref.) does that for some.
Was inexplicably moderated last week
on this; your shutterbugging skill in evidence on your profile and elsewhere is noted...
There is also some credence in raising the blood CO2 levels by rebreathing expired air.
Personally when aflicted I go outside, check the moon, lie down, roll over three times and on the third roll take a mouthful of grass (or mulch). Works every time. Hic.

Jen. Haha. I have a fund of cat lady stories. Just slipping the blue Budgie Smugglers on under the Levis then off for a late coffee rendevous (with a non cat lady who is fascinated by ethology) and after, a swim at Middle Park or St Kilda.

Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 28, 2009 11:35 PM

Probably more like too much Swamp-Gas than too little carbon-dioxide. It has a nasty reputation of blinding one to the light as well...

Posted by: heart2heart57 at January 28, 2009 10:53 PM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 28, 2009 9:44 PM
"She got the benefit twice before I tuned in."

Goodness and I thought your senses were much better attuned than that Marcus!

Methinks you really wanted to test the benefits to see if they were more worthwhile than the worry of any puss.

The bluetongue - Not sure if they have found a home for it yet or not. I was there tonight too. Forgot to ask. And I don't know what sex it is.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 28, 2009 10:49 PM

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 28, 2009 9:40 PM:
I don't think anyone was putting those words into your mouth. What you did say was "I actually think if there is true connection that a future partner would choose the person over a pet."

I think people were then thinking about what would be involved in the scenario you mention, and it would either be (a) find a new owner, (b) euthanase or knobble the animal yourself, (c) pass the animal to an animal shelter, where it would likely be euthanased after a certain period of time, or (d) dump the animal.

(a) is often not going to be possible. I can't imagine being able to find a new home for my 13 year-old cat. Certainly, I don't know anyone personally who would take her. So by the logic of your initial post, if I had a real connection with someone who had strenuous objections to the animal, then I would either euthanase/knobble/dump my cat.

So it's not exactly putting those words in your mouth, but rather, following through the logical implications of your original statement. I realise, though, that some of those implications are probably unacceptable to you, and fair enough.

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 28, 2009 10:47 PM

Same old crap being peddled by the same old people. It seems the Swamp is alive and well... Enjoy hanging it on each other, won't you? No.. Really, I mean it.... ENJOY!

Posted by: heart2heart57 at January 28, 2009 10:13 PM

jenniferhi at January 28, 2009 9:07 PM
Haha. She got the benefit twice before I tuned in. Apart from the aforementioned cat and kittylitter trick there is something decidedly off putting about the mindset of a 50 something woman who has regular 5 minute conversations in baby talk with an obese feline that has been allowed to sharpen it's claws on the couch.
Cheers Marcus

How did your friend get on with the bluetongue? Do you know what sex it is?

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 28, 2009 9:44 PM

btw - Who said anything about dumping pets? Certainly not me, if that is what is being insinuated!

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 28, 2009 9:40 PM

Posted by: waterbombe at January 28, 2009 7:50 PM..
".. try this remedy which has worked every time bar one for me: Hold your breath, but swallow three times at your normal speed...i.e. don't swallow 3 times rapidly. Hiccups are caused by too little carbon dioxide in the blood, and what you need to do is build that up again."

That's really interesting waterbombe... because I've been told a completely different reason for hiccups, & I'll certainly be checking it out!
I was told that hiccups happen when your diaphragm becomes stuck in the 'up' (exhale) position.. & that the actual hiccup was the body spasmodically trying to correct the diaphragm position..? Could be completely wrong, just what I've been told.

As for a 'cure'.... I have one foolproof (!yes!) way of fixing them. A dessert spoon of vinegar, preferably strong vinegar such as cider vinegar. It works EVERY time. My information was that it causes an involuntary contraction of the respiratory system which 'shocks' the diaphragm back into position.

Marcus? The science please?
Deco

Posted by: decoratress at January 28, 2009 9:23 PM

Posted by: waterbombe at January 28, 2009 8:32 PM
"Has anyone else noticed the disappearance of Heart2heart? I hope he hasn't been discarded. Could he have been reincarnated as Makeadifference?"

Yes I have noticed the disappearance too Waterbombe, and miss Tony's posts. But.... MAD is def. not H2H! Of that I am sure.

Cheers Tony and Gary!

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 28, 2009 9:22 PM

I would rather the person go to another home and I'll keep the pet, lol.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 28, 2009 9:12 PM

Marcus cats are supposed to be kept indoors at night irrespective whether it is cold or not. Surely she had a laundry or somewhere where the kitty box could be kept if necessary, or perhaps the cat could go into the garage with a little bed and its kitty box. I don't think the cat is the problem, the woman is, better off without her. I have a cat and she is brought in each evening but we certainly don't have a kitty box where it would stink out the house, that would be really foul.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 28, 2009 9:09 PM

Well Marcus I guess your urges seemed to outweigh the problem of the cat until at least 3 am. lol.

If they are a romantic deal breaker how come you even went in the door?

Miaow!!!

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 28, 2009 9:07 PM

Thanks WB for the hiccup advice. I don't normally have hiccups or anything like that and all of a sudden they started and just didn't stop. Went on for ages and ages. Can't think I did anything different last night to other nights but woke up tired this morning. Need a break I think.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 28, 2009 9:05 PM

Funny, all this talk about dogs. Tell you how much dogs love me. I am minding my neighbours chooks and dog while they are away. Jess, that dog - a red heeler, loves me and I often walk her. Also around where I live there are quite a few dogs that just wander around. No fussy neighbours around here. Well, I have my front door wide open at the moment to catch the breeze (what breeze?) and one of my favourite friendly dogs from around here just walks in to say hello. He often visits me. But tonight has decided to make himself quite at home. Love that! Actually this dog (Sam) I really would like to keep. He has the most beautiful nature. And I have let his owner know that if ever they are looking for a home for him, I would be delighted to have him.

Don't know why he wants to be inside at the moment. Think my house is hotter than outside at the moment. Am I too old to run around outside under the hose? Nah! Lol.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 28, 2009 9:02 PM

(Cats) are diagnostic of a febrile brain and various other issues. Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 28, 2009 8:15 PM

Does medical science know this Marcus? It would save all those expensive CAT scans and so on....doctors could just ask women how many cats they have. Simple! Why hasn't someone thought of this before???

Posted by: waterbombe at January 28, 2009 8:38 PM

Of course in our selfish society where some people discard spouses who have become inconvenient, what hope have the poor pets got? Gary Posted by: makeadifference1 at January 28, 2009 7:54 PM

I don't think its that simple Gary.

Has anyone else noticed the disappearance of Heart2heart? I hope he hasn't been discarded. Could he have been reincarnated as Makeadifference? They seem to have a lot in common imho.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 28, 2009 8:32 PM

.Jack Nicholson played a dog trainer in the 1992 movie Man Trouble- opposite the aptly named Ellen Barkin.
15 years later he demonstrated how much he had in common with MAD when he said; "We have more in common with a male dog than we do with a woman in this department. This may be male chauvinism in a certaincontext. But, baby, it's also science!
Jack, who is famous for his womanising ways - says all guys forget about women one hour after having sex with them, just like canines.

Cats are a romantic deal breaker for me, and many other men. Who wants emasculating toxoplasmosis, cat hair allergies and the ethical issues of these wildlife killers?
I tried to explain to one RSVP woman that the idea of having a cat stink out the house by crapping in the kitty litter at 3 am because it was cold outside was not likely to help her boyfriend quest. I got up and left. Since the same thing has happened to her again. She is still moping around, without a bloke, and refusing to accept that cats reduce partnering chances for women and are diagnostic of a febrile brain and various other issues.
Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 28, 2009 8:15 PM

"I also think when you give a home to an older dog, usually because they have been neglected, ill-treated, etc, that the bond between owner and animal can be even more the special. But that's getting a bit away from what we are discussing."...Jen, this is exactly what this topic is about...an excellent analogy:))

Posted by: istj54 at January 28, 2009 7:58 PM

Jen

The only circumstances I could imagine the need to rehome a dog in the event of a new human partnership (as opposed to taking the easy way out) would be:

1. If the new partner had a clinical allergy that could not be controlled by other means (eg frequent vacuuming and washing of the pet, perhaps desensitisation.)

2. If the new combined family had too many pets.

3. If two dogs belonging to the respective partners didn't get on to the point where vets were involved then regretably one of them may have to go.

All other excuses are just that, excuses.

Phobias can be treated and overcome.

The worst thing you can do to a dog is to exclude it from its pack which in the case of domestic dogs is the human family.

Of course in our selfish society where some people discard spouses who have become inconvenient, what hope have the poor pets got?

Gary

Posted by: makeadifference1 at January 28, 2009 7:54 PM

Exactly, FB. Well put.

I agree with Jen, why couldn't a dog or cat go to another good home if you partnered with someone who didn't like animals? It would be happier there if it were well cared for than if it was around someone who felt hostile to it.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 28, 2009 7:53 PM

Perth, no doubt you are over it. I imagine istjs suggestion of taking a squiz at TW's profile worked a treat. If it returns, try this remedy which has worked every time bar one for me: Hold your breath, but swallow three times at your normal speed...i.e. don't swallow 3 times rapidly. Hiccups are caused by too little carbon dioxide in the blood, and what you need to do is build that up again. That's why not breathing out works. (We breath in oxygen and breath out carbon dioxide. Plants do the reverse, that's what makes the world go round. But not for much longer if we don't get our collective act together...ok I'll get off my soap box now).

Posted by: waterbombe at January 28, 2009 7:50 PM

Marcus, surely you are not committing the same intellectual "crimes" you have accused other bloggers of? For example, (1) diagnosing Lynath, whom you have never met: "I get a sense of your mild, reactionary, moral panic"; (2) judging all members of a group from the actions of one :"The girls in that survey were all able to legally consent.... It demonstrates that feminists are ethically bankrupt, male hating idealogues" ; (3) missing some obvious (to a clear mind) points: "The girls in that survey were all able to legally consent; otherwise it would have been a criminal investigation wouldn't it?"...it may well have been a criminal investigation AS WELL...that wouldn't have prevented it being researched; (4) using words like "real", "correctly" and "false" in an intellectual argument, when these words mean "agreeable/disagreeable to me"; (5) presenting emotive arguments as intellectual arguments "It is implaccably hostile to men and works, vengeance mentality, against us". That's just for starters, and I only had to look as far as your most recent two posts below.

This is not a good look, Mr M. And while I'm here, can I ask why, among the thousands of RSVP members who read these blogs, has not one single ethology/biology student/academic fronted up and said "Marcus is right?" It won't matter if one does it now. It could be a fake profile. It's HIGHLY significant to me that your view attracts absolutely NO support from any of the scientifically educated people on RSVP. One simply has to wonder why, darl. You are on your own, a lone voice in a wilderness. Time for another think?

PS I think Lynath was joking about the "thousands". The "hundreds" person has probably got a sense of humour too.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 28, 2009 7:44 PM

Posted by: makeadifference1 at January 28, 2009 2:23 PM:

I agree with you. I mean, what would you do with your faithful companion of however many years who has now become "inconvenient"? Have it euthanased or take it on the long, lonely walk?

What sort of bloke would that make you?

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 28, 2009 6:53 PM

i wouldn't think that anyone who really cared for me would expect me to get rid of a pet as they would know me well enough to know by that time how distressing it would be for me. I couldn't imagine not having pets around as I enjoy their company in all sorts of situations. I think it's sensible to talk about these kinds of situations beforehand because they could cause major problems later on.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 28, 2009 5:44 PM

I think Lynath is right in choosing to do what she does. She obviously doesn't like being around dogs and I don't think she would have much respect for a person who dumped pets either. I know I wouldn't, in fact i would find it quite abhorrent and very shallow. I think she is just being very sensible and sticking to her guns and should be credited with using her brain.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 28, 2009 5:40 PM

Gary - I totally understand that. Don't get me wrong. I adore animals. Have had Labs and German Shepherds. And have cats too.

And I am one that would never ask anyone to give up a pet.

All I was trying to say though was that if a relationship has developed to such a degree I could certainly understand deciding the relationship overode the relationship with the animal. For whatever reasons are appropriate to the couple.

Perhaps the words I should have used were "could choose" instead of "would choose"

I certainly wouldn't like to be put in that position of course. Animals have always been part of my life too. And thankfully most people seem to like them.

I guess this discussion could lead on to the position a family could be in (and have been) when a pet attacks a family member. I remember the outcry a couple of years ago when the parent of a child attacked by the family dog did not want to have the pet destroyed.

Oh, and I totally agree that a dog is for life. Perhaps I can also see that that life may entail living with different owners. After all my dogs all came from previous owners. (a couple from the rspca, a neighbour who never cared about their dog. I used to walk him all the time and in the end when we were moving house, I asked if I could just take him. They readily agreed.)

I also think when you give a home to an older dog, usually because they have been neglected, ill-treated, etc, that the bond between owner and animal can be even more the special. But that's getting a bit away from what we are discussing.

Anyway, please don't read me wrong on this. Hopefully I've explained my feelings about it better this time. Then probably not, knowing me.

I love my animals too, and they come with the territory, i.e. me!

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 28, 2009 5:23 PM

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 27, 2009 11:10 PM

"I actually think if there is true connection that a future partner would choose the person over a pet."

My animals are part of what makes me who I am. I wouldn�t give up the canine members of my family for anyone. They are here for life. I'd no more give them up than I'd give up the kids. If a woman wanted me to do that she wouldn't be the right woman.

I bred Velvet and delivered her (and her mother) with my own hands. She was one of 10 and picked me the moment she opened her eyes. Add to that she actually saved my life there is no way I'd part with her.

For many divorcees the dog/s are all they have left. When the boys aren�t here my dogs are the only company I�ve got.

A dog is for life.

Gary

Posted by: makeadifference1 at January 28, 2009 2:23 PM

Further to my comments about Statutory Rape in the USA, of course the person having sex with a person under the Age of Consent needs to above the AOC to have offended, however, men as young as 17 have been gaoled for having sex with their younger girlfriends.
I think some States have brought in a "Romeo and Juliet" clause for this reason? (haven't got time to check if this is actually correct or not)

Of course Statutory Rape can be committed by both sexes, which is why that 35 yo Australian woman who met that 17 year old boy (yuk! She obviously didn't have boys of her own!) ) playing ?War of Warcraft was gaoled in the US. I think he moved to Australia when he turned 18 to be with her,
(Not a "Feminist" plot, Marcus!)
These charges are usually only used against the offender by the parents of the younger person, but can be done Child Protection agencies, etc under Mandatory Reporting.

Horrible in Adelaide again today, 44 degrees they are saying. Certainly need to worry about the pets in this weather, even the rabbit ends up inside!
Have to work, so will need to come home for lunch to check everything.
Keep cool and have a great day!

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 28, 2009 8:29 AM

lynathdairy January 27, 2009 10:48 PM

Thank you your Thousands-ship. Boomer pontificator and explicator. I like it. Another attractive boomer blogger in private correspondance confesses to her Hundreds-ship and modestly, in the best instinct of female sexual secretiveness, specifies no reason for the rejection of the vast majority.

I note that as well as your admitted dog and bird phobia I get a sense of your mild, reactionary, moral panic when certain relationship realities are examined from a primeval perspective. That implies a certain agreeance, which in turn suggests a rejection, of another, ideological position popular with females.

Explanation and justification are not the same thing when it comes to instinct. The more invested people are in Social Learning theories of behaviour the more confronting it is for them to discover that the real reasons stem from instinct. For a long time ethologists were blamed for justifying racial hostility because it was correctly explained to be a result of the isolation of species instinct. There is an old and false stereotype in peoples minds that says something like "whatever is natural cannot be ugly". I agree any aspects of behaviour are not only ugly but unacceptable in a civilised society. By uncovering the roots of 'racial prejudice' the most effective way of blocking it can also be found.

Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 28, 2009 7:35 AM

Yair, good on you Amber.

The girls in that survey were all able to legally consent; otherwise it would have been a criminal investigation wouldn't it? It demonstrates that feminists are ethically bankrupt, male hating idealogues, with behaviour definitions running in another, diverging reality.

It is not possible to 'properly debate' feminism. That implies that there is a sound intellectual basis and an underlying framework of reason and methodolgy behind it. There is none. It is implaccably hostile to men and works, vengeance mentality, against us. The reason why 'Womens Studies' are usully conducted in separate departments is because the ordinary academic scrutiny standards of humanities, let alone Science render such examination laughable. It is a crude ideology that as you indicate by your implied violent threat, I quote; "one day, when a son of a "genetically irelevant" woman punches you out for talking about HIS Mum like that", resorts to intimidation routinely. How would a similar level of shirtfronting appear against a 16 or 17 year old girl who wondered aloud "How can learning these beliefs make a woman as physically strong as a man"

Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 28, 2009 7:22 AM

iaminperth at 10:31 PM: Sorry to hear about your hiccoughs. Too late to help tonight - moderator will have clocked off by now till the morning.

My courier company won't accept any box over 40 kg, so my last 1200kg-capacity horse hoist kit (for Malanda 4885) went into 2 big cartons about 35kg each, and the third about 25kg. Too heavy for me to carry from my painting bay out to the car on my own, so I packed them sitting in the car, then taped and addressed, and drove them to the depot myself.

Slid them out to the back of the wagon (easily, because I have an ex-office thick smooth vinyl chairmat over the carpet) and across onto their forklift forks. I still manage OK, without the 5 full-time staff and 350-square-metre warehouse that I had in the 80s and 90s, before I down-sized, to let me semi-retire down to a 40-50 hour week after age 65.

Hope your hiccoughs soon subsided, and you got some sleep before your very early start.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 28, 2009 12:58 AM

Amber et al - I think it is useless trying to debate,discuss or explain the variances of love, relationships or female (even male) behaviour with Marcus. My observation is that he is incapable of understanding or accepting other points of view or even that we all think and see the world slightly differently from one another - in fact he gets quite frustrated/aggravated by it.
I believe it is because he has a lot of trouble understanding human behaviour, emotions and social interactions and has chosen ethology as his guide or rules to follow - after all, it's scientific.
I don't think Marcus even realises how offensive some of his comments are, as in his mind, he is just being honest (telling the truth, as he believes it) I suspect that some of his contempt for older women has been passed on to him from someone significant in his life, so he believes it and ethology conveniently gives him a proof of sorts. However skewed it maybe.
I have also noticed that when he doesn't like what someone says because it directly opposes his "rules" he will twist it out of context (or maybe he just totally misunderstands?)
But this is just my interpretation of the way he presents himself with his writings on this blog.......it could be that he just delights in the reactions he causes by haranging us with his ethological beliefs.

Posted by: aquamanda56 at January 28, 2009 12:37 AM

"Maybe they could teach you fellas' a trick or two. ...more snickers...." Posted by: fifilafume at January 27, 2009 10:01 PM

Thought you were talking about chocolate bars...

Perth, deep regular breaths... or shock!

Posted by: wistfuldeb at January 28, 2009 12:24 AM

TLD at 10.05pm: Thank you for having the bravery to air the litany of your horrors. I've never been charged, let alone gored by a wild pig, but that's my personal bogy, away from crocodile territory.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 28, 2009 12:10 AM

Posted by: iaminperth at January 27, 2009 10:51 PM

holding the breath always works for me,,

another way I have heard...is to drink a glass of water holding your nose with your head tipped back.....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 27, 2009 11:28 PM

Lynath - hmmmm. Thats a whole other topic I think.

I actually think if there is true connection that a future partner would choose the person over a pet. After all you certainly wouldn't be strangers by then. I suppose Marcus might be able to sort that sort of dilemma out for us.

Actually just today our family was offered a pet blue-tongue lizard that has been with a family for 8 years. (Guess loyalties can run-out). I said no, because I just know who would end up looking after it half the time. Anyway there is one that lives around my property that we constantly get to see. I prefer them living like that.

Oh, thousands hey, You go Girl!

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 27, 2009 11:10 PM

I'm so sorry Lynath that you are so afraid of dogs. As dogs are so much part of society it must be terribly inhibiting for you at times and cause a lot of worry in your life. I hope you are not too disturbed by them in your every day life as it seems that so many people have a dog nowadays. I am an owner of a german shepherd, my fifth and although all mine have been so friendly and loving I have never allowed them to run free as simply by their size they can look intimidating. The one I have at the moment would actually seek you out to make friends, which I find adorable, however it would scare the beejeezus out of some people. Obviously I am an animals lover and always have been but i can understand people being afraid of animals, who usually have had some very destructive owners, because all that most dogs want to do is please you.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 27, 2009 11:09 PM

Hi Lynath, Also read that baby boomers have no idea of the meaning of 'no' - I can relate to that as I am not very good at all with no and always seem to ask why not and if I want to do something I do it. It's easy really but totally annoying to other people at times, lol.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 27, 2009 11:04 PM

...check out TW's profile...that should od it:))

Posted by: istj54 at January 27, 2009 10:57 PM

I have the hiccups, does anyone know how to get rid of them, I need to get some sleep as I have a huge day tomorrow starting at 5a.m. Have tried holding my breath, nearly went blue but they won't stop.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 27, 2009 10:51 PM

Jenniferhi..no one who is attached to an animal is ever likely to choose a stranger over the pet!

The comment about not taking rejection personally was a general Pontification.
I have just finished reading an amusing book about Baby Boomers called Balsamic Dreams. One of the main sins and signs of the Boomer is to Pontificate and give opinions on everything to everyone.

Marcus you baby boomer you!

Another theme of the book is one which is also recognisable here in the blogs and that is:
"the absolute refusal to accept the ordinary"
"The Everday Epiphany" "They insist that every experience be a watershed, every meal extraordinary, every friendship epochal every sunset meta-celestial"
It is a frightening thing to see the truth in print...and yet hilarious with its accurate lampooning.
wistfuldeb, yes, I know Marcus uses subconscious desire and pre programming due to evolution to justify and explain all unacceptable male behaviour.

Colleen, recently separated men are no go zones for me too.

Hello Timewarp - sounds like a painful experience..

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 27, 2009 10:48 PM

Posted by amberlight58 at January 27, 2009 10:13 PM

You always say in a about 1000 words what I attempt to say in 10...you make my point so eloquently....thank you.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 27, 2009 10:32 PM

You package and despatch a hoist to lift an animal in excess of 800kgs.....good grief, and people do that for you. I suppose that would be the same as moving it along some kind of track where one person holds the head of the beast which weighs about 200kgs. let it go you have been found out, super porkies all round, I have never heard anything so silly in all my life, it's laughable. Get into the game of life and stop telling all the porkers and then you may eventually achieve something.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 27, 2009 10:31 PM

HaHa, FB that was meant as a pun actually. I know EXACTLY what you mean.....still laughing.........K

Posted by: auntykaz at January 27, 2009 10:15 PM

Gosh Marcus,
Sorry to be still "sounding like a shrill harpie today, yelling at the wind", but you do like to take things out of context when you get upset, don't you?
Can you please quote exactly where in my post I threatened to send my sons around to bash you?
Talk about dramatic licence!
Been watching too much "Underbelly", lately?
Or maybe the hot Melbourne weather has just got to you, dear?
I'd just love to know what those other RSVP women must have said then, ("You are now one of several women here who have suggested openly that they are prepared to use violence against me/men when their ideology is challenged or they are personally irritated") if you thought my mentioning I have 3 sons, ("so why on earth, would I "hate" men?") was actually threatening you!
I can't possibly imagine why a 12 year old (my youngest) would even inspire such trepidation!

I suggest to you Marcus, that you actually don't say in "real life" half the cr*p you say on these blogs down at your friendly "local", you're not that stupid!

So your Mum was "still genetically relevant when she made the 'despite feminism' quip" was she Marcus?
I'm sure she'd be just thrilled to know that!
As by your terms, a woman's "genetic relevance" runs out by around age 40, that would have made her around her mid to late 30s when she made that quip.
As you are now at the ripe old age of 50 yourself, your Mum would now have to be in her 70s?
(Unless of course she had you when she was a slip of a girl of 15? But even then she'd still be 65).
As she was a teacher, I can only imagine having a child at 15, 50 long years ago, would have put a stop to any academic career she many have aspired to.
So I imagine she must have been at least in her 20s when you were born, as female teachers were usually expected to give up their jobs back then on marriage.

So if your Mum was "still genetically relevant" by your standards, then you must have been in your teens?
Full credit to you Marcus, for remembering this conversation around 32-35 years later!

Did you actually attend these meetings, too? Because your recall of those "couple of obese, roast beef faced, female homosexuals" who obviously scarred you for life, is so amazing!
Must have had quite an effect on you, then?

I am so delighted for your Mum, that she has in your eyes, always been "socially relevant".
I am quite sure your Mum could think of a few other older women she knows who she thinks are still "socially relevant" as well!
Like her friends and relatives.
As could most of your own friends, who would be around your age?
I imagine they think their wives and mothers are also "socially relevant".
Of course, whether YOU actually think so doesn't make a lot of difference in their scheme of things, does it?

So a survey in the USA done by a feminist "researcher" proves what?
You haven't actually stated what the ages of the young women surveyed were, Marcus.
But if they were under the Age of Consent when they had sex, even with their current partners, yes it is an offence all over the world, not just in the in the United States, called "Statutory Rape" (or "Carnal Knowledge" or a number of different names/terms depending on what country you are in.)
The problem for people caught in this situation, is the Age of Consent varies from state to state from age 16 in the majority of the United States to age 18 in California.

I think if I "googled" Marcus, I could find any number of surveys done by various men as well, merely to push their own particular barrow.
Wasn't it Mark Twain who exasperated over ‘Lies, damn lies and statistics!’?

I am quite happy to discuss "a rational, systematic debunking of feminism" and be "presented with intuitively wise ethological alternatives"
However, I don't believe you would be capable of such rationality when it comes to discussing Feminism.
You are too bl**dy scared of anyone who appears even remotely "feminist" to be considered rational OR wise!

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 27, 2009 10:13 PM

iaminperth and mad...too many big bad wolf stories maybe?
History of Dogs who Hate Me starts with Sparky..next door neighbours big red dog. was bigger than me and knocked me over all the time.
Big, no giant ,Alsation slobbering and snarling dog lay in wait for me to pass by on the way to school everyday. It rushed at the fence and sent me screaming down the road heart pounding..
Uncles farm dogs took over on holidays...they don't call them Blue Heelers for nothing..they rounded me up plenty of times.
My brother and his friends demanding lollies with menace and threatening to get friends dog to bite me.
I have stood petrified on the spot while some passer by rescued my toddler from an Alsatian on the loose which rushed her and started to bite.

My nephew was was attacked by a Pit Bull a few years ago and after extensive surgery has large noticeable scars on his arms.

I suppose dogs have always equalled
fear, and dogs know when a person is fearful of them. If I see a scary
looking dog around shops or anywhere I won't get out of the car or come out from where I am until it is gone. It is undignified to run screaming down the street if the dog approaches(which they always do) or jump behind and clutch onto a passer by as a human shield you know....

My friends have dogs . I will go in the room with them but I can't touch them or pat them, and they always push me in the back of the knees with their paws to trip me up if they get a chance....
My brother has two fierce creatures or one fierce one and one copycat , so I never visit him unless he promises to keep them locked up safely. When he first put in his ducted heating it wasn't working properly after a short time. Under the house for investigation and he finds the dogs have ripped down the ducts to direct the hot air onto themselves....
The most scary are Rottweilers Alsations and Pit Bulls

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 27, 2009 10:05 PM

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 27, 2009 8:17 PM

Yeah, l tend to think that your comment is correct in some way FB

Nothing wrong with having a drink, and l never objected to that, but the continual drunkedness wore a bit thin after a while. Much rather have a cup of tea myself........K

Posted by: auntykaz at January 27, 2009 10:02 PM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 27, 2009 6:26 PM

Darling....why the lesbian bashing....are you jealous//,,,,,,they are not driven by the need to spread their seed.....they have sex with women for the pure pleasure of it.

Maybe they could teach you fellas' a trick or two. ...more snickers....

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 27, 2009 10:01 PM

@ planetauntykaz

As far as the snip goes and it's connection with sex drive? Partnering is about acting out a whole suite of instinctive behaviours. Copulation may be incidental. Now, as throughout our evolution, most copulation is recreational/ pair bonding and it is desirable that there is no fertilisation. This is generally very strongly so in short term matings. Having sex does not imply babies. Vasectomies make zip difference to sex drive.

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 27, 2009 9:59 PM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 27, 2009 6:51 PM

"Truth is the more attractive their partner the more satisfied the 'ego' is. Not just any partner but the best one you can attract"

Is that true Marcus.??? (ironic hypothetical question) .....

I always wondered why they looked so chuffed the next morning....snicker...... you really brings the narcissist out in me Marcus

Colleen

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 27, 2009 9:51 PM

Posted by eccehomoergo at January 26, 2009 10:29 PM

Oh dear.....".No doubt you've read all those ?" yes and many more.....but I won't list every book I have ever read by a feminist...

* well actually women have had the right to vote for about 80 or so years - and its highly unlikely to be revoked, is it?
(The swiss finally did so in 1978 - haha)"

are you for real......"on the 12th June 1902 the Commonwealth Franchise Act came into effect, granting most Australian women the right to vote and stand in Commonwealth elections.""

that adds up to 106 years....if I am correct.

Women began fighting for the right to vote in America in the mid 18th century and the suffrage movement was active in Britain between 1860 and 1918.

Don't quote me on this but I think the vote was the first thing on the suffragette's agenda.

""custody of her children previously the property of her husband
divorce,the right to make choices in relation to her own body""

""* here lies the better "improvements" in my opinion." ......I'm assuming you are attempting to be ironic here......shame!

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 27, 2009 9:33 PM

Did I say hundreds Waterbombe and Jenniferhi? oops I meant thousands...sorry...

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 27, 2009 9:25 PM

Posted by: auntykaz at January 27, 2009 8:28 PM:

I know precisely what Marcus would say in response to that... lol..

Maybe I've been reading these blogs too long. :)

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 27, 2009 9:23 PM

personally I can't stand anyone who talks behind a persons back or tries to elevate their own egos in that way. Fair enough relating something that is enjoyable is fine or noting someones finer points but anything else is just nasty so far as I am concerned. I can't even be bothered talking to a person again most times if they start denigrating another person. I just find it rather pathetic and don't really want to mix with people like that. As for the 'next' that is totally offensive to me also as who would ever want to be 'next'. Sounds rather like a herd of cattle and I can't believe that anyone would be so offensive and so stupid as to categorize another human being in that way. All in all I find all the writings totally offensive to anyone when talking about 'next' to satisfy your own pathetic lacking ego of nothingness. To be a complete person who is sensitive and kind, there really needs to be no need to be screaming 'next'. We are supposed to be higher than animals in reasoning and emotions, not like a load of cattle, albeit, a load of aged probably innocent cattle passing thru the chute, how revolting that statement is.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 27, 2009 9:03 PM

Marcus @ 6.26 today.
Of course stating the bleeding obvious, Marcus.
Women do lose their ability to have children in their midlife.
That is not a theory but fact.
And so say all of us, in my opinion.
No way would l want to have more children than l did. The first was born when l was 26, the second when l was 28.

Loving husband at the time decided to have the snip. And nothing wrong with that, although it did make his surprise 30th birthday celebrations a tad muted. Well for him, anyway.

So clearly he decided that his built in need to spread his seed was not so important after all.

What do you think of men who choose to end their reproductivity then Marcus ??

Timewarp, silly boy, that was a joke, Joyce, l know that your specs would not be rose colored.Tinted, maybe, but not rose........K.

Posted by: auntykaz at January 27, 2009 8:28 PM

Agree Marcus, Although quantity over quality is the go for many people, adding another notch to the belt so as to speak. But we are all adults and able to make out own decisions so if you don't want to become another 'notch' then don't, but if it doesn't bother you, well so what that's okay too. Some women are extremely predatory nowadays in the name of getting back at the blokes. I can't see anything wrong with that if that's what they want to do, but it's just predatory behaviour, nothing new. We think Boofer is a rat, a very large one, but we can't take pictures as they would frighten him so we feed him when he comes to our house each night and he is rather friendly. I can touch his nose now when I put nuts and fruit in his bowl and my dog and two cats are not bothered by him at all. He is just part of our little environment here and is very welcome to visit whenever he chooses to. I have never seen him during the day but then I work most days. He loves fruit and he loves nuts and sometimes he picks the nuts up with his front legs. he is extremely pretty, but then again all animals to me are very attractive.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 27, 2009 8:24 PM

Posted by: auntykaz at January 27, 2009 6:11 PM:
Sounds like he is a hard-core alco. Hard-core alcos can't move on from the past, because nothing new ever happens in the present.

Posted by: featherlessbiped at January 27, 2009 8:17 PM

iaminperth at January 26, 5:14 PM: Thank you, you are so complimentary! But you are overlooking my rat cunning, which lets me worm myself in where I apparently have no right to be.

Hey, my Ads don't feature my premises at all. And hear this - I'm not even a tenant backyarder - I get all the parts made by specialist subbies who are backyarders or not too much bigger, I package and despatch the kit and then the vet's builder assembles the hoist on site from my 5-page instruction book. And if he has any questions, he phones my mobile from a thousand miles away.

No Perth. My Ads only list the useful extra features in my horse hoists, compared with the opposition, show a photo of the first one installed in Brisbane, and offer to put enquirers in touch with happy previous users. That's all it takes. No porkies required, and tennis calls. Seeya.
.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 27, 2009 8:14 PM

kaz at 8:18 PM 26th: Yuo've got the rose in the wrong gob there. Supposed to be in hers, not mine. And 'the blinkers' was a reference to the string of a dozen or so very entertaining but off-topic posts that had just been retro-axed from the Valentines Day blog. Red cars etc.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 27, 2009 7:28 PM

iaminperth at January 26, 5:42 PM: I heartily agree with you. Start out by seeing if you enjoy their company, and if you both do, that justifies another date, where you both decide again about a further date. And so on, till you agree you'll become a couple.

Anyone who has a set timetable to bed his next conquest is focussing on too small a part of you, and you know that any concavity would suffice, Next!

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 27, 2009 7:16 PM

fifilafume at January 26,5:32 PM: No way, Colleen. I got my jollies too. And kicked in for groceries and for weekends away. The toy-boy bit was her original motivation but it progressed from there.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 27, 2009 7:08 PM

Poochesinperth wrote: "I think a lot of people just have flings and sleep around to satisfy their egos"

Truth is the more attractive their partner the more satisfied the 'ego' is. Not just any partner but the best one you can attract. This is the basis of sexual selection. The most enjoyable, fulfilling sex is usually had with someone closest to your attraction ideal.
The reason WHY people want to go through the expensive mating process is an innate evolutionary one called reproduction that kicks in strongly and silently and that the brain has to find rationalisations for.

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 27, 2009 6:51 PM

This didn't get posted this morning so I'll reframe it more nicely this time. Given the language you get away with Marcus, I'm surprised at the moderation some of us experience. Marcus, this comment of yours gave me the best laugh of last week: With one fell sweep of your typing hand, you re-framed an unfaithful husband from a self-centred destroyer of love and trust to one who contributes an "uncontrolled generous gift to humanity". ROFLMAO. In your view men who can't keep their penis in their pants are "doing their duty" like some genetic war-hero. Very funny. You really have an excellent imagination, I give you that.

BTW when my partner hears the stuff you and Ecco write he is astonished that you have not re-located to the Stone Age where you would be much happier. It seems to me that Timewarp might be of help here, give that his choice of name might indicate one of his scientific interests. Perhaps Timewarp could manufacture a time travel machine to make this journey possible? Whaddya reckon, Timewarp, could you combine your horse-hoist and chandelier technology with your engineering expertise to get Marcus and Ecco back where they would feel right at home - the early Stone Age?

Posted by: waterbombe at January 27, 2009 6:27 PM

Good on you Ambler.
You are sounding like a shrill harpie today, yelling at the wind.
Lets have a rational debate on your terms or you will send your sons around to bash me for the collective insult I have delivered by mentioning the reality that all women reach a stage in their lives when their reproductive system irreversibly shuts down? You are now one of several women here who have suggested openly that they are prepared to use violence against me/men when their ideology is challenged or they are personally irritated.

My mum was still genetically relevant when she made the 'despite feminism' quip. She has always been extremely socially relevant. She had come home from a Women's Electoral Lobby meeting or 'forum' (meeting implied male organisation systems) that was run by a couple of obese, roast beef faced, female homosexuals who were intent on lambasting evil men like my father. At the same time these womyn were instinctively emulating the meeting power structures and 'intimidatory' methods they decried in men. Dad was slightly bemused by this and like me, interested in social change that led to a safer, more egalitarian society. These womyn would stridently remark that anything a man could do a woman could equally. Dad once asked one of these dykes why it was that good State level male runners could equal the women's world/Olympic record over the same distance.
I read an interesting survey taken at a uni in the States. A feminist 'researcher', a cohort of one of the authors Colleen mentioned, did a sexual assault survey on female students.
She found an inordinately high number of these young women had been raped, although most were unaware of it and still with their "attacker".
When pressed she said that at the age these women were, and the pressure they were under, meant they were obviously unable to give informed consent.

As far as women giving me informed consent? Haha. Informed consent by a mother and daughter is not outside the realm either.
You would resent it, but not be suprised at how many women appreciate a rational, systematic debunking of feminism when presented with intuitively wise ethological alternatives.

Cheers Marcus

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 27, 2009 6:26 PM

Hmmm, yes, "hundreds of men", Lynath....was that an off the cuff comment or an actual body count?

I think that your location would reduce the number of contacts, Jen...unfortunately people don't want to travel far. Never mind how delightful you are, we all want someone next door. It's a pity...many of us are missing out on someone special.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 27, 2009 6:20 PM

Posted by: fifilafume at January 26, 2009 5:25 PM

Absolutely, Colleen!! Said male should also question his propensity to call his former wife at the drop of a hat, or text her.
Okay, well me then.
My ex does it often and l have made it clear that l do not wish to communicate with him unless it is about the kids (who are adults, by the way). I rarely answer the phone and do not return texts or calls. I had my mobile number changed as l was getting drunk dials several times a week.
And still he persists.
What is with that ??
Checklist for me.
Moved on....yep.
Financial affairs all settled...yep.
Marital home sold...yep.
New home being built...yep.
Happy...yep.

No l do not get it at all.
Hel left a message the other week to discuss son's 21st.....which is in late August. Um. l don't think even son has thought about it!
Needless to say that message went unanswered. Far too hot to think about birthday parties in late August...........K

Posted by: auntykaz at January 27, 2009 6:11 PM

Actually, most are just getting their jollies any way they can, whether it be homosexual or hetreosexual and the last thing on their mind is creating another human being.Posted by: iaminperth at January 26, 2009 11:25 PM

That's exactly right Perth and that's exactly what Darwin said....no animal or human thinks about its evolutionary survival on any level whatsoever..they just go for the Most Likely and the resulting kiddies survive or die out according to how well they fit their environment. I don't know where Marcus is getting his evolution, but it ain't from anyone who knows Darwin's work. Evolution, or natural selection, is retrospective. In other words a species pays later for what it did earlier...much like a credit card.

Posted by: waterbombe at January 27, 2009 5:41 PM

Oh, also Lynath you have turned down "hundreds of perfectly good men".

Hundreds? Well lucky you to be able to do that I have to say. And that wouldn't even include I am assuming the hundreds of ones not so good shall we say.

Oh, to be so lucky I have to say.

And I mean that in the nicest way.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 27, 2009 4:51 PM

Posted by auntykaz at January 26, 2009 8:18 PM

You are funny...I like it.....I'm am off to work with a smile.

Thanks.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 27, 2009 10:58 AM

Perth - a belated Happy Birthday for Friday! Sounds like you had a lovely time on Saturday.

Posted by: willow29 at January 27, 2009 10:11 AM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 26, 2009 4:54 PM

"I have turned down hundreds of perfectly good men because I am absolutely scared of dogs and see no point in meeting a man with a dog (and have now written that on my profile)."

As long as your fear is not based on a clinical allergy you could unlearn your fear. I could help you but unfortunately I am on the other side of the country.

MAD

Posted by: makeadifference1 at January 27, 2009 1:08 AM

Lynath, i'm not angry just perplexed. My belief is love or something deeper won't develop when you have rationalised your attraction to someone, despite how compatible or convenient their acquaintance may be. You will be perpetuating something that doesn't have potential and that is misrepresentation and hurtful unless the other person is similarly rationalising (as has been my experience over the last few months). These are the three month relationships to avoid but many probably can't distinguish the difference and should not be blamed.

Instinctive attraction or unbelievable chemistry leads to natural healthy emotions and the superficial doesn't seem important. Okay, some things may be problematic and that is where experience matters but the saying love conquers all, does come to mind. True, really knowing someone takes time and would be granted under these conditions. Big sigh :))

Gentlemen, i'm struggling to understand your respective points. Perhaps you could try being clear and concise without the emotive language. Doh, male enabled and facilitated; of course they held the legislative powers! Why have changes been made over the last fifty years compared to the last two thousand? Surely persuasive feminine reason (as opposed to fanatical feminism) that Amber and Colleen are advocating was influential?

Ecce, your definition of sexual liberation seems rather raw. Sounds like you have been hanging out at too many raves!

Another point, Lynath i think Marcus believes furtive affairs arise from subconscious desires rather than conscious efforts to provide gifts to humanity but i could be wrong.

Posted by: wistfuldeb at January 26, 2009 11:50 PM

I think a lot of people just have flings and sleep around to satisfy their egos. I don't think a lot of time that it has anything to do with emotional feelings and consequences, it is simply an ego things. Guys like to boast to other guys and the woman confide in other women. They get excitement out of it, it's forbidden and it's exciting. In the real world, probably the two people wouldn't even look at each other. I think Marcus is stating the mating habits of animals and it has no relevance to the mating habits of human beings. Spreading seed is a primary instinct definitely but humans have reasoning powers so usually the higher of the species realizes this is not an option all the time. Actually, most are just getting their jollies any way they can, whether it be homosexual or hetreosexual and the last thing on their mind is creating another human being.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 26, 2009 11:25 PM

Posted by: fifilafume at January 26, 2009 11:12 AM

Now the list of feminist writers is endless far larger than your two...... Gioconda Belli, Mate McPhelim Cleary, Germaine Greer, Kate O'Brien, Virgina Woolf, Sarah Mararet Fuller, Gertrude Stein......and hundreds more.

Colleen,
No doubt you've read all those ?

feminism has given our daughters the
right to vote

* well actually women have had the right to vote for about 80 or so years - and its highly unlikely to be revoked, is it?
(The swiss finally did so in 1978 - haha)

to equal consideration for a bank loan or credit

* well - yeaah - half of their customers are women ! Its just good business practice to include women .

custody of her children previously the property of her husband
divorce,the right to make choices in relation to her own body

* here lies the better "improvements" in my opinion

"but also the opportunity to love again, after love lost."

Colleen

Posted by: eccehomoergo at January 26, 2009 10:29 PM

But maybe Lynath that special man may just choose a relationship with you over his dog. I mean if the connection is good on all other levels surely the sacrifice would be worth it.

Then again I could say too that isn't it all about stepping out of comfort zone as well? (for you I mean).

Don't know where you got that I would take a knock back personally. Guess I did way back when I first got into this internet dating thing. But goodness, certainly doesn't bother me now. Interesting that I am in contact with someone at the moment I sent a kiss to two years ago and he knocked me back. He recently contacted me and we are having some great interaction.

I guess my main point I was trying to make was don't judge all books by the covers.
There sure can be a whole lot more inside.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 26, 2009 9:59 PM

Wow Marcus, how do you get away with it! Most of us have to use "st*rs" when we use not so acceptable to RSVP words!

Gosh Eccho and Marcus, feeling a little bit hostile are we?
Marcus no doubt your Mum isn't all that excited about some of the changes attributed to feminism. In the same way that some of my generation aren't too pleased with the $5,000 baby bonus and the possibility of women being entitled to paid Maternity Leave. We didn't get these things when we were raising our children, why should younger people?
I am aware that many older women (and men) see the social changes that have occurred in the last 30 years as causing the destruction of society as we once knew it.
Once again Marcus, you insist that these changes only came about because men "allowed" them to happen. Maybe women finally getting the vote made these "generous" men a litttle more receptive to women's interests and rights?

It is fascinating that you should call for your obviously "genetically irrelevant" Mum's opinion in the feminist argument, Marcus.
But then your Mum is your Mum, isn't she and you love her. I don't suppose you would appreciate someone talking about your Mum in such a disrespectful and insulting way?
I suppose then one day, when a son of a "genetically irelevant" woman punches you out for talking about HIS Mum like that, I am sure you will understand!

By disrespecting "genetically irrelevant" women, Marcus, you don't seem to realise that you are disrespecting the mothers and grandmothers of all of us, including your own.

BTW, are your Mum's opinions similar to yours when you discuss with her "large numbers of yowling, spraying, genetically irrelevant cat ladies."? Or the "discharge from the pruriginous, collective intellectual vaginal infection caused by brainwashed women wiping up from the incontinent anus of radical feminism"?
Your desciptive use of the english language (she was a teacher wasn't she?) must make her so proud!

What a shame you and eccho can't have a rational debate about feminism without resorting to hostile and vitriolic insults.
What has Feminism ever done to you?
Except perhaps ensure that young attractive women are financially independent and so no longer have to "settle" for less than wonderful men?

According to you, eccho, blog women "hate" men and we will be jealous of our daughters because we are sexually unfulfilled.
Eccho if your life is so "sexually fulfilled" why are you on RSVP anyway?
Couldn't your own argument then be used to explain why you and Marcus appear so hostile towards blog women?

Nowhere in my post or on these blogs have I ever given the impression that I am a "man hater"!
I enjoy the company of men, I have male friends, male work colleagues whom I get along well with, I have 3 sons. Why on earth would I "hate" men?
Yes even to me, some of the more radical feminists have certainly indicated that they aren't too fond of men, but then there are plenty of men around who obviously don't like women.

Marcus, when you say the things you say about "genetically irrelevant females" and "large numbers of yowling, spraying, genetically irrelevant cat ladies." you can't exactly enamour yourself to the younger more relevant females, you yourself seem to aspire to.
For a 30 year old woman in her reproductive prime, there is only around 15 years to your idea of genetic irrelevancy!
Not only have you insulted her mother, but you have also indicated that should she aspire to a long-term relationship with you, you will show her the same disrespect when she eventually reaches her "use by date".
No doubt, there are women just queuing for your kind of "unconditional love" right now!
Just make sure you point them towards these blogs won't you, so they'll know what to look forward to if they contemplate any long-term future with you?

Posted by: amberlight58 at January 26, 2009 9:41 PM

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 26, 2009 11:37 AM
"Sometimes, in life, things happen when they happen for reasons unbeknown to me. I harbour no resentment or ill will to anyone that I have met. It's all part of the journey."

Those words are exactly right Rod and a great way to live life. We are all on a journey. Aint life grand? It's all a never ending adventure.

Glad you had a great weekend. Sounds fab.

Jen

Posted by: jenniferhi at January 26, 2009 9:39 PM

Lynath, May I ask why you are so afraid of dogs. I can understand people feeling threatened by dogs, or finding dogs a bit stinky etc., but to be totally afraid of dogs. Is that all dogs, or don't like the whole community situation with someone who owns a dog. I am interested that is all. I think for me I find them such sociable and interesting creatures and I have always had one. I have never wanted a lap dog though, mine have always been working dogs and I incorporate them into my life and me into theres. I have owned five german shepherds thus far and this one and I go trekking in winter which is quite challenging at times but very interesting and very stimulating. We have attained our Level 1 and will next winter go for our level 2 which means finding people in dense bush. At the end of the day it's exhausting but a lot of fun and a lot of great dogs with people owning them.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 26, 2009 9:11 PM

TLD: Lovely to see you back, and benefit from your latest insights.

My latest fall? Just reunited with the young woman (42) that I got off the grass a few years ago, and then got her allowed contact with her son (8) every Sunday - provided I supervised that contact. For a never-ending year, Then she could have him without me, and I bowed out with some relief.

Had driven her to see mutual friends till dusk, and then reprogrammed her phone. Came out after dark, well behind schedule to get home, change shoes and go RSL dancing with my social club Dabblers.

Looking ahead at her front gate to see where the latch was, I didn't notice the concrete sleeper that stops cars hitting the house. Tripped over it and fell heavily on my reading glasses not yet pocketed. Drew blood at the temple, and the brick floor was all hard. More haste less speed, my Mum used to say.

A bit of shock, so I missed the dance and worded a new sales brochure instead till the small hours. At least I didn't break 2 ribs or a finger, like my last 2 falls in 2007. Time I got dieting seriously , so I'll fall lighter next time, hey?

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 26, 2009 9:11 PM

Of course l look in the mirror TD, how on earth do you think my hair gets dry every morning at the crack of dawn ??
Oh, you mean something different ??
Okay, right, one thing l can honestly and without prejudice is that l am a fairly upstraight kind of woman, not into bullshit and ego driven men. Already had "The Ego Has Landed" for a husband, sadly he is now "The Drunk Who Keeps On Keeping On"
I work hard, enjoy my chosen career path, have 2 great kids and a close family. My friends tell me that l have a dry sense of humor, am loyal (unless crossed) and very trustworthy. Treating people shabbily is not on my radar, unless they prove to be someone that is unsavory.
Okay, mirror has now been put away.

Timewarp, l am sure that rose suits you well my dear, but sunnies would surely suit you better...put those blinkers away.....

Hot Hot Hot here in Melbourne and getting hotter....it is going to be a stinker of a week, thank goodness someone invented airconditioning!!..............K

Posted by: auntykaz at January 26, 2009 8:18 PM

I gave a guy a lovely bottle of cognac last year with a ribbon tied around it and a light hearted card. I thought it not too heavy, not too light and we were able to share some of it. He liked it anyway.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 26, 2009 6:29 PM

That is such a sensible post lynath. I have the opposite at times, posts say don't like pets. Well, there are three of them in this household so what's the point of contacting me. I would like to think that friendships should start where you spend time together and then if there are shared interests maybe something will grow from that. Could take a week, could take a month or even more time. Putting time on any type of contact seems irrelevant to me as surely it should be based on feelings not on timing. You will know if you wish to see a person again and you will know if you don't simple as that. If one person is reluctant or not that interested so be it, let it go, they weren't for you or you weren't for them. I don't particularly like people who want to jump all over me the minute they meet or start becoming particularly demonstrative in public, it puts me off very quickly but that's just me and I think that maybe if they bothered to get to know me better straight up it would never happen. However, it's not the be all and end all most times but can get a little tedious.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 26, 2009 5:42 PM

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 26, 2009 11:16 AM

"my main role was to pleasure her at bedtime (8pm) when required"

People who give pleasure only for someone else's enjoyment usually get paid for it. Did you?

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 26, 2009 5:32 PM

We had wonderful fresh seafood on Saturday night and lots of mangoes and grapes and three different salads. All sitting outside besides the pool on a beautiful evening. What fun, good conversation, some really nice wine and a couple of special ones to try and lots of laughter. My eldest can do some hilarious impersonations of people she has seen on television and she gets funnier as she gets older so she had people in stitches some of the time. I was quite surprised how confident and friendly she was. It was so satisfying to see everyone mixing so well and laughing so much. That's what it's all about really isn't it, laughing and being happy and being with great friends and family. Oh, and, of course, the pets, the lovely faithful pets.

Posted by: iaminperth at January 26, 2009 5:25 PM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 26, 2009 4:31 PM

You are so right about the rewritting the history of the marriage. That is one of the things that scares me off men who are newly separated and not divorced.

They are often still locked into their own story about the marriage.....and need some time and space to get to grips with their own part in its demise. After all if she hasn't wanted to have sex with him for the last 10 years, ( a common story that I hear) he must ask himself why, and he usually doesn't,

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 26, 2009 5:25 PM

eccehomoergo you seem to have confused Feminism with lack of self respect.
Just because women are liberated to some extent does not mean that they are unable to conduct themselves with dignity.

Feminism has brought more ability to control ones actions and personal behaviour not less.

You are also confusing the advent of the contraceptive pill thus freeing women from never ending child bearing and ill health, with the most recent wave of Feminism.

Feminism tends to rise and fall in waves. At the start of the 19th Century couples were living together and having children much like they are today. Prior to the Industrial revolution men and women worked side by side and shared domesticity and child rearing. The Industrial Revolution sent men away from home and family for the first time (except wars) and thus started us towards the way of life we have today which has had detrimental effect on men and boys as well as women.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 26, 2009 5:19 PM

Yes, i would say that about half a dozen vets have hoists installed. Mainly Universities and large animals hospitals. Some vets do specialize in large animals. They also have large volumes of animals going thru necessitating large professional staff numbers. They have holding yards for animals waiting for treatment and additional land available for commercial horse transport to arrive and to leave. Specialist anaesthetists are also on hand as are more facilities for the xray machines. They need to operate 24 hours per day and have holding yards where these animals are monitored by night staff prior to being able to be moved to alternate accommodation. Specialist farriers are also on hand as quite often hoof problems can develop after general anesthetic. All in all these operations cost millions of dollars to set up as horses are extremely difficult when it comes to anaesthetic and will thrash when coming out of the anaesthetic. Only when there is no other option are horses anaesthetised. Even the amount of the drug used is excessively expensive and the xray equipment needed adds additional hundreds of thousands to the whole operation. These are extremely professional operations and I can assure you that no one with a backyard business under a rented house would be involved so get real old boy and cut the porkies !

Posted by: iaminperth at January 26, 2009 5:14 PM

Posted by tassiedude1 at January 26, 2009 11:37 AM

Good to read an upbeat post from you Rod

enjoy

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 26, 2009 5:12 PM

Oh dear, here we go again, the valuable sperm theory....ho hum Marcus. Is not a woman's egg equally as valuable ??
After all without both conception would not occur. Or have you got that one all sown up too ??....
Tiresome to read yet again about the value of a spermosaurus....
Oh look, a companion for ejaculatisman................K

Posted by: auntykaz at January 26, 2009 5:03 PM

wistfuldeb

I think you should not be angry with the three -monthers. It takes about that amount of time to get a glimpse of the real person. If you don't like who that is then there is no point in carrying on further. Love can be very rational especially for those who have learned by experience what is right or wrong for them.

Jenniferhi I disagree with your comment "The connection should come at a much deeper level than superficial stuff like that." Superficial stuff can be what makes or breaks a relationship. You can't get to the deep connections as you say unless you can match superficially at first.

If it is important to someone that their partner be employed then there is nothing wrong with that at all.
I have to say again that if your contact is rejected don't take it personally..you have no idea what is in mind of the other person no matter how compatible they may appear on paper. I have turned down hundreds of perfectly good men because I am absolutely scared of dogs and see no point in meeting a man with a dog(and have now written that on my profile) . I did ask a man how old his dog was once and considered meeting him because it was 12, but what if he wanted another one? It is not my role in life to restrict others because of my fear of dogs.Superficial to some, important to me.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 26, 2009 4:54 PM

iaminperth ..enjoying your work.

Maybe Timewarp is referring to some years back when the recovery was a long one.

Timewarp what caused you to fall?

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 26, 2009 4:37 PM

Marcus I have a new name for you
Pontificator Maximus Marcus.

A man engaging in a furtive affair is generally not doing it to spread his seed in any "uncontrolled generous gift to humanity" way.
He is doing it because some female has made it possible. Opportunity. She has not selected him (the alpha male) for his most valuable sperm but rather his most valuable wallet or most valuable ability to help her passage through life in some way.(Often she may use the sperm to ensure this by producing offspring and thus the tie that binds) He meanwhile wonders how it all happened.

Secondly he is doing it because there is something not right in his life and the opportunity presented appears to be the answer he is looking for.

Colleen is right. Men(or women) engaging in extra marital affairs must rewrite the history of the marriage relationship in their minds in order to justify what they are doing to themselves and others and to be able to inflict the pain and suffering which follows.The affair partner will be chief editor of the process it is guaranteed.

A short time down the track when the affair is exposed for what it is and the world is collapsing around them realisation of the enormity of what they have done to harm themselves and relationships of true value dawns and they want to make amends.

A man like Colleens ex would have benefitted from facing up to whatever the problem was at the time and working on that, not taking what appeared to be an easy way out.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at January 26, 2009 4:31 PM

Now where's me blinkers? Is love actually like the other things that we can't appreciate until we've sampled them, and don't appreciate, till we no longer can?

Do we only want it after we can no longer have it?

Maybe yes, maybe no. I believe we do have to feel love before we can even define it, and that a later deeper love can raise the bar on our definition.

Complacency can lead to smugness, and stop us fully appreciating a good thing when we're onto it. I've been somewhere near there, once or twice.

And once I was no longer on the good thing, it sometimes did look better in retrospect than it had at the time, but I believe that was only loneliness's notorious rose-coloured glasses. "I can see clearly now" Kaz.

Posted by: timewarp1 at January 26, 2009 4:22 PM

At the risk of agreeing with Marcus:

" It is an ideology which is enforced by believers who assault, shout down, and otherwise intimidate and victimise people who disagree openly with it."

This is what many of us think of when the word "Feminisim" is used. Not equality, but a one sided demand for special status from a special interest group backed up with full scale assualt and vicimisation of anyone, male or female, who dares to question why in 2009 the Sisters deserve special treatment.

There is no room for this sort of behaviour in the 21st Century. Everyone has the right to be treated equally.

MAD

Posted by: makeadifference1 at January 26, 2009 3:21 PM

Gentlemen, i'm struggling to understand your respective points. Perhaps you could try being clear and concise without the emotive language.

Are you annunciating that women shouldn't vote, can't have the right to choose? Doh, male enabled and facilitated; of course they held the legislative powers! Why have changes been made over the last fifty years compared to the last two thousand? Surely the persuasive feminine reason that Amber and Colleen are advocating was influential?

Any movement has fanatics, feminism being no different, but that is not what this discussion is about.

Ecce, your definition of liberation seems rather raw. Sounds like you have been hanging out at too many raves!

Posted by: wistfuldeb at January 26, 2009 3:12 PM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 25, 2009 2:26 PM

It's main use on the blogs though seems to be the creation of large numbers of yowling, spraying, genetically irrelevant cat ladies.

Older women, as opposed to older men are never irrelevant.

I personally do my bit in keeping the older male, healthy, happy, and less grumpy....ie I chase his blues away.

And babe, grumpy is what you have too look foward to once you realise the younger gals are not looking at you.

And for your sake if some "genetically irreleveant cat lady" does half as much for you as I do for mine....you will be a very lucky happy old man.

And how does this relate to topic....to love again,

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 26, 2009 1:02 PM

Posted by: laughsandtalks at January 25, 2009, 2:26 PM

In fact 'feminist' has gathered a nasty pejorative meaning, perhaps replacing t 'cunt' for vitriol

A vacuous cliche Marcus, but worse, it is a cynical lie created by the sexist media....

"As I say give boys Barby dolls"...Hugh Hefner has already supplied those babe.....but where is the love.

Colleen

Posted by: fifilafume at January 26, 2009 12:48 PM

Wow what an awesome weekend. I'm looking forward to going back to work too recover. (weary smile :))))

Wow and what interesting comments on the blogs. I was thinking about a lengthy reply but nah... cant be bothered.

istj54

I thought you were having a little "go" at me however upon reflection and with a little more information I found your post to be an absolutely brilliant extension to my thoughts about the "one" and "looking for love".
The fact that to succeed in this sort of dating environment you do need to go through the meny :)

That is exactly what I have discovered and that is what disparages me about all this. I am not interested in the many and all of the build up to meeting people is based on illusions. (There you go, go to town on that one).

Sometimes, in life, things happen when they happen for reasons unbeknown to me. I harbour no resentment or ill will to anyone that I have met. It's all part of the journey.

FB.
Dude!.....
I cant believe you took the time and effort to dissect and reverse psycho analyse every sentence in my generalised post.(which I thought was actually quite a reasonable discussion starter).
Not that I care what you do but Imagine if you spent that time and effort into creating an idea or discussion topic of your own.

Colleen, Amanda and C C good on you guys. At least you saw it for what it was.

eccehomoergo:

I didn't get home until 6am this morning and I'm still buzzing. Lol

Played at the pub last night before watching Hip Hop artist and DJ Zee Tripp do his thing. After that people wouldn't leave me alone and kept dragging me around everywhere. I had to sneak out of the club this morning to get away. lol

Seem to me to be quite a lot of different personalities on here. The one's that scare me the most are the one's who sit in the corners, sharpening their claws and ready to disembowel at every opportunity.

I have looked in the mirror once already and must say I was quite pleased with the refection.

Have you?

Happy Aussie day everyone enjoy the rest of the day. Back to work tomorrow.

Rod
xxx

Posted by: tassiedude1 at January 26, 2009 11:37 AM

Dear Perth
re yours of 10.49pm 25th
I will try to reply to your questions.

How did it work? Part-time = I spent about 4 nights a week at her place, including most of most weekends, including when we went to her favourite seaside motel for the weekend.

Toy boy = my main role was to pleasure her at bedtime (8pm) when required, ie about 3 nights a week. If not required, she'd sleep while I used her computer till midnight. I also took turns at meal preparation, mowed her lawn and did handyman jobs around her town-house. And our laundry, because she had to leave for work at 8am, and my newly-reopened business was taking me only about 30 hours a week then. A lot more by the following year.

Age: Not 110. She was 69 and I was 66. At that age she was up at daylight each morning for a brisk 45-min walk round her suburb before her shower, brekkie and off to work. And ready for bed at 8pm. Most mornings I walked with her, but sometimes slept in.

Soon after we parted, both her hips suddenly packed it in. They wouldn't operate unless she had a carer to take her home and stay with her for a while. I'd previously done the same for 5 days for one of my mates - another Bill - when he had a hernia op. That had saved one of his sons having to fly over from N.Z. for a week to mind him.

Home from hospital, she needed that leg lifted into bed and lifted out again, several