RSVP Blog
Does time really tell?
When you first meet someone, do you rely heavily on an instant connection, refusing to explore a possible relationship any further than the first coffee? Or do you give people the benefit of the doubt, even when you don't feel instantly 'connected'? Are you quick to decide someone just isn't right for you - or are you happy to go along for the ride to see what time tells you? Can you measure your compatibility with someone by the number of dates you have with them?
Have you started dating someone you weren't all too keen on, only to see the relationship blossom beautifully, or perhaps you know of someone this has happened to? Or, have you seen a relationship sustained as a sheer refuge from single-dom - even though it was/is totally dysfunctional? How long does it take you to decide whether someone is right/wrong for you? Do you have a tried and true method? Do you feel you have been accurate with every partner selection/dismissal you have made, or have you made some serious blunders? Haven't we all...
Posted by August 7, 2008 11:58 AM
Latest Comments
lifebegins47 at August 20, 2008 1:30 AM
HOORAY!!!!
And the very best wishes....
You have probaby found "it"
Congratulations!!
Posted by: creativestuart at August 20, 2008 10:03 AM
Posted by: lifebegins47 at August 20, 2008 1:30 AM - Finally! Someone who has taken a chance. Kissed a Toad and found a Prince...
Posted by: heart2heart57 at August 20, 2008 8:29 AM
LIfebegins - good on you! Great news and I hope it works out well for you :)
Posted by: willow29 at August 20, 2008 7:05 AM
Just an update on a previous blog. And on topic!!
As said earlier I went on a first date just over a week ago, and under my new more relaxed approach, changed my attitude about how to perceive this gentleman. Old guidelines were similiar to a lot here in that if it didnt click straight away, walk away. There was no instant spark, but some fun light hearted conversation, but nothing at all that even altered my pulse rate.
New rules therefore a second date last weekend, a day out at an auction fair ( not my choice of venue so went with a bit of a ho hum attitude, but as the day progressed he opened up more and more, a sensitive and intelligent caring man, full of ideas and charm, but still not ringing any bells.
Third date, the decider in my book, he cooked dinner in his home for me and we watched a dvd, he let me choose, and more of him opened up and we talked and laughed and I discovered a very very interesting man. Sill a bit quiet and not very outgoing, and then he kissed me goodnight...... well he blew my socks off ( and thats all, tempting as it was!) What a passionate man hiding in the quietest of souls!!!
My point is , apart from now really looking forward to the next date, is that due to reading the blogs and listening to different ideas and viewpoints from both genders, I approached this first date with a different mindset. The old one would have said, oh no, no spark no zing no second date. That would have been a great mistake as this man is just blossoming into more wonderful each time I see him. So again thanks to those that helped my thoughts, and for those with the 4 second judgement, think again, sometimes real gems take a while to be clearly seen.
Cheers to all!! xx
Posted by: lifebegins47 at August 20, 2008 1:30 AM
The wise man in a storm has an umbrella (he looked at the forecast)
Posted by: decoratress at August 19, 2008 10:27 PM
HAHA...and a set of floaties just in case Decoratress!!!................K
Posted by: auntykaz at August 19, 2008 11:26 PM
Was it Shakespeare or someone else who said: 'Whoever loved who loved not at first sight?'
Posted by: margie18 at August 19, 2008 10:45 PM
The wise man in a storm has an umbrella (he looked at the forecast)
Posted by: decoratress at August 19, 2008 10:27 PM
'''The wise man in a storm doesn't pray......if he is wise,he will use his eyes to look for and legs to run to shelter...or safety."
Posted by: musicteacher at August 19, 2008 7:18 PM
Can you comment on nothing, hobart212hal2000? It is a big subject, surely? Nothing is the sum total of what all of us don't know...it appears to be nothing because we can't see it or feel it or understand it....you don't know what you don't know ....is that any good as a start? Or should I just have another whisky?
Posted by: waterbombe at August 19, 2008 4:39 PM
WB,
He did say he'd comment when we gave him something to comment on! Sadly I can't think of anything at the moment!
Posted by: amberlight58 at August 19, 2008 11:24 AM
what has happened to this blog? It is slowing to a crawwwwlllllll. Where is HobartManyTwo's (hobart212hal2000) when you need him?
Posted by: waterbombe at August 19, 2008 10:11 AM
Posted by: amberlight58 at August 18, 2008 9:29 PM - Amen to that...
Posted by: heart2heart57 at August 19, 2008 12:47 AM
I've now started walking around work and asking people CAKE OR DEATH!?
I soo love watching Eddie Izzard.
Thanks heart2heart57 and Jeff from brighting my week :D
Wanda
Posted by: muffin91 at August 18, 2008 9:47 PM
ERAL, August 17 @ 3:48 PM,
Couldn't agree more! I have always found it difficult to swallow the whole "Jesus died for our sins" business!
However, I suppose if you want people to convert and "buy" your product, nothing like a good selling point for those in Jesus' time, who found the other religions all too much about taking personal responsibility for your actions! This "selling" point may have accounted for the huge uptake of Christianity in the middle ages!
In my teenage years I really wanted to believe, so I tried to read the Bible but I found I just couldn't believe in it at all.
However, over the years I have seen the comfort believing in God, has given to people going through the most terrible times and I would never begrudge anyone the comfort that having faith in a higher power gives them.
Sometimes it is the only thing that keeps a person going especially when terrible tragedy strikes.
Religious fundamentalists of any religion are scary individuals who seem unable to see things in anything other than black and white terms.
I believe it is those kinds of people of any faith, who are responsible for the terrible injustices that have been perpetrated in the name of God.
Posted by: amberlight58 at August 18, 2008 9:29 PM
This one's wet... and this one's wet... and this one's wet..this one is wet...this one is wet...did you dry these in a rainforest? Why, with the power of the Death Star do we not have a tray that is *bleep* dry...
Baron Von Vader-ham ... too much ... lmao.
Posted by: heart2heart57 at August 18, 2008 8:51 PM
browneyedozgirl August 18, 2008 1:52 PM
That quip is as about as logical as prayer. Surely a sensible person in a storm would pray that a tree didn't land on them rather than for fearlessness as they were squashed by it?
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 18, 2008 8:18 PM
"The wise man in the storm prays to God, not for safety from danger, but deliverance from fear" -- I love this, eatsrootsandleaves. In my opinion, snippets of Emersonian wisdom are always welcome...
Posted by: browneyedozgirl at August 18, 2008 1:52 PM
Jeff Vader.. Can I have your autograph?
Posted by: muffin91 at August 18, 2008 8:06 AM
Posted by: muffin91 at August 17, 2008 10:26 PM
ohh FFS - You need to speak with Mr Stevens,
and the rest of form a cue if you want food !
or "DEATH by TRAY" it shall be !
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 18, 2008 12:57 AM
is that vegitarian or vegan???????????????
Posted by: unknownauthor at August 17, 2008 11:40 PM
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 15, 2008 3:31 PM
What Men Want In Women (Age 17 to 117):
Turn up naked.
Bring beer.
:)
Posted by: heart2heart57 at August 17, 2008 11:30 PM
Would now be a good time to mention the lolspeak Bible Translation Project?
Posted by: thelynathdiary at August 17, 2008 11:27 PM
Jeff...
What kind of canteen are you running here? All the trays are wet! Are you sure you didn't start a canteen in the rainforest?
Posted by: muffin91 at August 17, 2008 10:26 PM
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 17, 2008 9:11 PM Marcus, where did you get threat from (is the addled mind of spanky rubbing off on you?????)....it is merely a comment that while you say religion is dangerous, I think that intolerance is.................... Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 8:17 PM entirely agree, and it is what I strive to do.......... and ERAL, you're on fire with the quotes tonight ....... I like "the truth you speak has no past and no future, it is and that's all it needs to be"
Posted by: spanky668 at August 17, 2008 10:22 PM
Marcus, thanks for that.
Tolerance, even if we do not agree with each other, can at times be better than arguing and challenging..... Only at times though.
And no, not bloody mindedness on your behalf, well l don't think so anyway.......K
Posted by: auntykaz at August 17, 2008 10:21 PM
here... here... Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 9:18 PM... but hey all it seems as though we have may have "deviated" from the topic???
Posted by: thornbird64 at August 17, 2008 10:09 PM
Stu...(and the rest of you 'chosen ones')
If you find it helps you to get through life...God,Dog,Buddha,Hydro,Lager,Merlin,Mecca...
Good .
"The wise man in the storm prays to God, not for safety from danger, but deliverance from fear" RWE
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 9:18 PM
auntykaz at August 17, 2008 7:45 PM
Kaz. Why? I am interested in their explanations and fascinated by the reasons why educated people believe weird things.
And perhaps bloody mindedness....
Spanky. Was that some sort of a threat or just you agreeing that intolerance, religious intolerance, has killed in it's millions and is a major reason for so much strife?
Stuart can I assume from your comments about evolution and creation that the 'project' you are working on at your block and would like a wife for is the Ballan Ark?
Seriously, there is a mountain of evidence for evolution, which importantly, is not a theory seeking to explain how life began, but none for Creation. Do you really believe the world was made in 7 days a few thousand years ago?
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 17, 2008 9:11 PM
"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense."
-Buddha (536 B.C.-483 B.C.)
Posted by: thornbird64 at August 17, 2008 9:03 PM
...Because talks cheap Kaz, that's why.
Posted by: iaminperth at August 17, 2008 8:37 PM
Don't you hate it when the blogs come to a standstill in the middle of something and your reply comes in after the joke has finished? Its like yelling to someone at a nightclub over the music, and the music suddenly stops but you're still yelling.
Posted by: willow29 at August 17, 2008 8:36 PM
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 17, 2008 6:10 PM
Posted by spanky668 at August 17, 2008 7:56 PM
"Too much sanity may be madness and the maddest of all, to see life as it is and not as it should be." ~ Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 8:17 PM
ooh I see! The food is hot...
Posted by: willow29 at August 17, 2008 8:01 PM
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 17, 2008 6:10 PM "faith as heavily marketed is the principal vice of religion; it is a brain virus, a meme, and can be extremely dangerous.
" ...... as can intolerance
Posted by: spanky668 at August 17, 2008 7:56 PM
Posted by: willow29 at August 17, 2008 7:23 PM
Willow, sorry , but you'll need a tray, the food is hot !
Jeff
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 7:46 PM
Marcus, not a silly question at all, just one that you don't like.
I think you would be aware that l actually share some of your views in regards to religion etc. We have discussed that, you and l.
I understand your point of view regarding relief / faith / religion
I just don't understand why those who are religious have to prove why they are...........K
Posted by: auntykaz at August 17, 2008 7:45 PM
Its ok Mr Vader, Ive turned vegetarian.
Posted by: willow29 at August 17, 2008 7:23 PM
thelynathdiary at August 17, 2008 6:03 PM
I am not going to recycle all that story here, the popular story is it started on the separation when Henry VIII wanted an annulment to mary Anne Boleyn in 1534, it was actually started 1000 years earlier!
Marcus you certainly like twisting things to suit your arguements. Lies would be absolutely No1 on my Bad list.
And it totally is dependant on your point of view what you decided is lies or the truth for indeed there is no absolute proof for either creation or evolution.
Concidering how many people in the world would say they are religious and how few of those (who of course get the most press) are either abusing the religionsto their own ends I would still easily argue based upon pure statistits that those who believe are more good than bad.
Also Marcus you have faith and religion so mixed up you can'y tell when you are talking about on or the other, and they are certainly very individual things. You are merely attacking based upon all the worst case (minority) circumstances.
Posted by: creativestuart at August 17, 2008 7:10 PM
Actually the funny thing i really don' t get about religion is the people here who state their religion/belief as Buddhist- and then go on about finding their "soul mate" !
huuhh??
"The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. Only the moment you reject all help are you freed." (Hindu Prince Gautama Siddharta, the founder of Buddhism, 563-483 B.C.)
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 6:52 PM
Posted by: willow29 at August 17, 2008 6:14 PM
Very well ! but we're going to run out of the chicken at this rate...
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 6:48 PM
Posted by: muffin91 at August 17, 2008 5:52 PM
Do you know who i am ??
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 6:36 PM
Disturbing Willow ? ( sardonic may be a better description) Intellectual even.
For the more genteel amongst us :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqi5F5MqqTQ
"The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.� Mark Twain
but "time will tell..."
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 6:27 PM
I'll have the chicken then, please :)
Posted by: willow29 at August 17, 2008 6:14 PM
creatorstuart August 17, 2008 4:18 PM
In your reduction it follows:
Good = believing in a fantastically improbable central point: the existence of a sky god, that a virgin birth occured, that the smelly dead arose after 3 days in a grave and that frightening the wits out of little kids with intimidation by teaching fear of hell and damnation is OK
Bad = Questioning these beliefs, exposing them as preposterous lies and seeking a rational truth outside the churches invention of a fantasy world
So, fantasising, lying, child intimidators and proposers of preposterous rubbish go to Heaven
Truthful, honest rationalists get sent to Hell
spanky668 at August 17, 2008 2:48 PM Fly check please son.
Church dogma and resitance to science set back human understanding centuries and still attempts to. think birth control info/condoms. Witness their insistence on and punishment of disageement with flat earth theory.. Well before Columbus your Savannah dwelling ancestors noticed that the shape of the earths shadow on the moon is round (like in this mornings eclipse).
There is no good reason why supernatural eavesdroppers need to be investigated. Dark matter understanding is fundamental to our proper explanation of the universe. There is direct evidence for it so it is worthy of exploration. When the LHC project gets underway shortly expect some of the questions to be answered. As those questions are answered the liklihood of creator god is vanishingly small.
And science is one of the most moral and honest disciplines around, because science would collapse if it was not for the scrupulous adherence to honesty in the reporting of evidence.
Kaz you silly question of me indicates you have not understood my point.
Hard to argue with privately held supernatural beliefs indeed but faith as heavily marketed is the principal vice of religion; it is a brain virus, a meme, and can be extremely dangerous.
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 17, 2008 6:10 PM
Stuart the creation of the Anglican Church was an absolution wasn't it?
Posted by: thelynathdiary at August 17, 2008 6:03 PM
I know this was asked to Stuart, but I really couldn't help myself.
I'll have the cake please... but if I am the 3rd person to ask for cake then I'll have the chicken with the white wine.
I know not many people would get this, so it was mostly aimed at eatsrootsand leaves.
Posted by: muffin91 at August 17, 2008 5:52 PM
Edward Anholt wrote the adapted screenplay for Arthur Hiller's film of the same name - "The Man in The Glass Booth"
The original play written by Robert Shaw.
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 5:50 PM
Ohh well then Stuart - CAKE or DEATH ?
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 5:02 PM
I think that quote is from a disturbing play by Edward Anholt, as his character, Goldman is farewelling his 5 mistresses at a dinner table. Out of all this discussion, isnt it fascinating to see how our minds work, how indelible these beliefs, whatever they may be are fixed, how the beliefs originated in the first place, how strongly people defend them. Genetically we are all of the same race, yet so much brings people together... and divides them.
Posted by: willow29 at August 17, 2008 4:54 PM
ERL I am Anglican and that is certainly not how my religion works!
No easy confession absolutions with us!
Far more focus on Good ==> Heaven Bad ==> Hell !!
Posted by: creativestuart at August 17, 2008 4:18 PM
My only real gripe with religion (and especially Christianity) is that encourages the delusion within the devotee, that they will be absolved from ALL their misbehavior (by JC) in exchange for their unquestioning faith in 'him'.
"Just believe in me and you are saved from eternal damnation..."
In the words of playwright, Robert Shaw - "A Christian is just a nervous Jew, who thinks he bought himself a A1 insurance policy !"
(PS - Never forget that 80 Million Germans backed Hitler's final solution - were they all psychotic ?)
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 17, 2008 3:48 PM
amberlight58 at August 17, 2008 1:42 PM
I think that the most of those now looking are doing way too much thinking and now where near enough doing. Certainly this is the case with the 30 something girl...
In one of my favoutite Elvis songs it is all correct....
A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation aint satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me
Satisfy me baby
Baby close your eyes and listen to the music
Drifting through a summer breeze
Its a groovy night and I can show you how to use it
Come along with me and put your mind at ease
A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation aint satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me
Satisfy me baby
Come on baby Im tired of talking
Grab your coat and lets start walking
Come on, come on
Come on, come on
Come on, come on
Dont procrastinate, dont articulate
Girl its getting late, gettin upset waitin around
A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation aint satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me
Satisfy me baby
As for me whilst I am obviously attracted to a pretty girl, what is going on inside her is a whole lot more important than the packaging when it comes to relationships.
And indeed when it comes to looks I am actually far more attracted to a girl who is more "Kate Fischer" womanly than "Kate Moss" stick figure. I'm a sucker for curves and a mane of brunette hair.
This is how it has always been for me.
Posted by: creativestuart at August 17, 2008 2:52 PM
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 16, 2008 7:17 PM Some would argue that there is evidence, just not measurable in the way you would like it to be......... just as dark matter (in astronomy/physics) can only be inferred from other phenomenon....... it is a way of explaining what we see, observe "know" to be true, but has no tangible measurable existence that we can definitively prove (its existence makes other things make sense, but cannot be directly measured ..........sound familiar Marcus) ........people keep arguing as if there is an absolute truth that we humans have figured out, in times of Columbus the Earth was "known" to be flat, at other times the universe revolved around the earth, the atom was the smallest nuclear particle......... why do we still purport to have all the answers when clearly we do not............
Posted by: spanky668 at August 17, 2008 2:48 PM
Amber: "Looking" is the word! lol
Posted by: willow29 at August 17, 2008 2:16 PM
Willow @ 4:21 PM August 15,
I'd bet there are a lot of guys out there that are looking for the same thing at 60 that they were looking for at 20!
Hey Eral, who says we are THAT desperate at any age? (Upwards of 32)
Posted by: amberlight58 at August 17, 2008 1:42 PM
Here, here, Kaz!
I find the constant need to continually interrogate people to somehow justify their beliefs very boring and verging on "bullying" behaviour.
Why should anyone have to justify their spiritual beliefs to you, Marcus?
Just let it be!
Posted by: amberlight58 at August 17, 2008 1:01 PM
laughsandtalks at August 16, 2008 7:19 PM: I'm really interested in the neandertals - mainly how they coexisted with our forebears for so long.
I have a theory, based on 3 pieces of evidence:
* They were shorter but much stronger and burlier.
* Adult male skeletons studied have a typical injury pattern which correlates very closely with modern human rodeo riders/buckjumpers.
* Their eye sockets were much larger, suggesting huge eyes (the origin of "the boogie man"?)
My theory is that they were night hunters, driving deer etc along a trail beneath trees from which more of them would play "drop bear".
This would give them a food source unavailable to us, till we invented the hidden pit floored with sharp stakes, or the bow and arrow.
The neandertals took good care of their elderly, including those seriouusly crippled with arthritis, and one young adult female was found buried after she'd been covered in a deep blanket of flowers. Our close cousins, I reckon.
Posted by: timewarp1 at August 16, 2008 11:36 PM
Marcus, a question. .....Why is it so very important to you that the faith / belief of others be proven as fact??
Do they not have a right to believe in whatever they wish, just as you have a right not to??
I think my views on faith and religion have been written of here before, but l don't begrudge anyone the right to believe. I fail to see why you can't do the same...............K
Posted by: auntykaz at August 16, 2008 10:14 PM
I think the blogs have been moderated into oblivion. We are now so totally off any kind of topic discussing the never ending debate- religion. Then we have dogs, which is great as I love dogs, all kinds but what has that got to do with anything. Anything that is posted is now moderated and fiddled with to such an extent that it makes no sense when eventually turns up. Yet, long drawn out egotistical nonsense which has no relevance to anything in everyday life always get thru. Saying the same things, trying to justify their own existence and quite frankly talking a load of rubbish with no connection to reality. I think it's a huge shame as the blogs were once a bit of fun, now they are boringly indifferent.
Posted by: iaminperth at August 16, 2008 8:57 PM
istj54 at August 16, 2008 11:45 AM
Your first, recognizably modern human boyfriend probably first appeared about 160000 years ago in Africa. He was a homo sapiens, his predecessors where the various intermediate, archaic homo erectus.
You may have wanted to date a neanderthal boy but there would have been a bit of tribal resistance. Recent studies have shown them to be a genetically distinct but living alongside moderns until perhaps 28000 in Europe.
Anyway these blokes trace back their common ancestors to the rise of mammals 160mya and through all our various ancestors when life began est. 4bya
and perhaps in the deep hot rocks below the earths surface or the hot sulphurous vents of undersea volcanoes or perhaps in Willow's primordial soup.
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 16, 2008 7:19 PM
missrule at August 16, 2008 3:22 PM
You are at it again pretending that somehow faith has as worthy a place as reason. It doesn't. Faith requires no justification, offers no rationale or explanation. It is precisely what you are arguing, that 'faith is faith' that propels bomb belt fitted terrorists or the more benign seeming but equally abhorent American style fundamentalist warmongering science decriers.
As far as proof required there is ample. Suicide bombers shout God is Great before they detonate and various murderers of abortion Dr's in the States regulalry invoke God in their defence. As far the existence of God goes, well, we have been waiting a while and not a scintilla of evidence has been presented by the 'for' side- and there is no good reason to think it ever will because almost anything 'believed' can be explained, yes rationally.
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 16, 2008 7:17 PM
I dont know why most are having such a hard time with dealing with nature.
Wild human children that have been found living amongst wild animals show the true nature of the ape with, they scream the smash they fight etc like other apes ...
Without the imitative conditioning of civilsed parents, we are not much more than a smart monkey.
And it doesn't take much to return a civilized man to that form either. Sent to fight for himself in a brutal war, or starved by a famine etc, and you will see how quickly he/she remembers what their nails and teeth are for.
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 16, 2008 5:26 PM
Marcus, I don't pretend to understand the mind of a suicide bomber. How could I, or you, when in many cases their own parents are horrified to find out what kind of creature they have been nurturing?
Most religions, as far as I know, prescribe respect for life and for your fellow humans. Certainly my Muslim friends (I don't have many, but enough to get a general feel for it) say that this is true of Islam and the fundamentalist nutters are twisting and abusing the religion to their own ends. (Sorry - that bad pun again.)
As I've said before, my faith is my faith and if I didn't want to believe what my particular "branch" of Christianity told me, I would leave and find another (in fact, I have done so twice in the past). Nobody is forced into conforming to one belief or the other these days - indeed, it's almost unfashionable to follow a mainstream religion. Well, I never pretended to be fashionable. I do drive a Mazda Tribute, after all :)
You have chosen to reject the whole shebang and I respect your right to do so. You might believe I am deluded but I believe I'm not. As I said previously, there is no proof either way so can we just leave it at that?
PS it's spelt "blithely" honey ;)
Posted by: missrule at August 16, 2008 3:22 PM
Primordial soup anyone? Or is the wrong blog?
Posted by: willow29 at August 16, 2008 2:21 PM
istj54 - yea, somethimes you can tell as soon as you meet a person that it will definitely not work, no point investing time into it. Somethimes the body language does the trick, other times the contradiction in values and attitudes! And yes, it might happen that the firts impression is positive and you are willing to explore the possibilities, but over 3-6-12 months or even years you realise there is no real potential there...this is all like a 'game'...
A simple example: just by reading people's postings on these
community bloggs I have a good idea where people's values, self esteem, communication skills, intellectual capacity, emotional maturity is, how they handle differences and challenges, how would they behave in a relationship when conflicts arise - are they "I am OK - you re not OK" or "I am OK - you are OK too" or "I am not OK - You are not OK either" types? Are they controlling or likely to see 'win-win' solutions? Are they aggressive or caring? Are they open to listen to others and hear them or they are self absorbed? Flexible minded or rigid?These things are very important in a relationship! Somethimes it takes time to work out whether it is possible to resolve conflicts in a healthy, 'win-win' manner...other times you can tell immediately...also, people who disregard personal boundaries at the very first meeting (lean too close, almost in your face; want to touch you )
are usually controlling individuals...from job interviews I had in the past, I have learned that when I felt really safe and comfortable at the interview, I was able to be fully myself - I was the happiest at those jobs...when the presence of some interviewers made me tense and feeling as I had to 'prove' something - I disliked the job with that organisation. The culture of the place...I have not much experience with meeting men who I do not know, but that limited experience taught me the same thing: if I am nervous and tense in the company of that man, it's a good sign that something is not right for me there....
Posted by: piscesgirl56 at August 16, 2008 1:43 PM
Posted by: forevernow1 at August 16, 2008 10:46 AM - Beautifully said...
Posted by: heart2heart57 at August 16, 2008 12:23 PM
...I meant the very first man ever...please explain how he...or she, came to be, Marcus. There must be some "believable/provable/evidential" explanation for me so that I can give up my faith and believe in all the scientific theories.
Posted by: istj54 at August 16, 2008 11:45 AM
istj54
something to do with sexual reproduction being a good idea from the point of view of genetic diversity and also the design and building of houses, cars, clothing and protection from other men.
Cheers M
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 16, 2008 11:00 AM
Once there lived a village of creatures along the bottom of a great crystal river.
The current of the river swept silently over them all - young and old, rich and poor, good and evil, the current going it's own way, knowing only it's own crystal self.
Each creature in it's own manner clung tightly to the twigs and rocks of the river bottom, for clinging was their way of life, and resisting the current what each had learned from birth.
But one creature said at last, 'I am tired of clinging. Though I cannot see it with my eyes, I trust that the current knows where it is going. I shall let go and let it take me where it will. Clinging, I shall die of boredom.
The other creatures laughed and said, 'Fool! Let go, and that current you worship will throw you tumbled and smashed against the rocks, and you will die quicker than boredom!'
But the one heeded them not, and taking a breath did let go, and at once was tumbled and smashed by the current across the rocks.
Yet in time, as the creature refused to cling again, the current lifted him free from the bottom, and he was bruised and hurt no more.
And the creatures downstream, to whom he was a stranger, cried 'See a miracle! A creature like ourselves, yet he flies! See the Messiah come to save us all!'
And the one carried in the current said, "I am no more messiah than you. The river delights to lift us free, if only we dare let go. Out true work is this voyage, this adventure."
But they cried the more, 'Savior!' all the while clinging to the rocks, and when they looked again he was gone, and they were left alone making legends of a Savior."
Posted by: forevernow1 at August 16, 2008 10:46 AM
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 15, 2008 6:15 PM ...so explain to me, please, how the first man came to be.
Back on topic...time can and does tell in every way...not just dating. You can tell within seconds if someone is not for you, or it can take a few dates. Once into a relationship, three months seems to be a time when decisions are made...then six...then it's either a habit for all sorts of reasons...or, just maybe, the real deal.
Posted by: istj54 at August 16, 2008 7:20 AM
missrule August 15, 2008 9:53 PM
I take it that the bit about not blaming religion for it's followers behaviour was your comedy lapse for the week?
I'ts true men all have the equipment for rape but there is no movement exhorting men to do this and almost no self respecting men do.
Religion on the other hand demands respect because it is religious faith. Removing that mistaken principle of respect would go along way to alerting people that teaching of 'moderate' religion is an invitation for extremism. You don't have to make any case for what you believe. In any other field telling the palpable falsehoods that religion blythely does would have you run out or prosecuted certainly not given respect and dangerous legitimacy. Where does the faithhead as that most frighteningly lethal of weapon's the suicide bomber come from? A junior soccer team?
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 16, 2008 4:05 AM
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 10:56 PM
Stu, every car is fitted with seatbelts and most with at least one airbag. That is compulsory.
Not every driver takes the drink driving laws on board as we know. Surely the introduction of compulsory fitting of seatbelts, and with it the wearing of them would be at least on a par with the drink driving laws?
My ex used to and still does drive home from the city drunk. Has done for years. Always wore a seatbelt, NEVER been breathtested, more is the pity! Silly booger!............K
Posted by: auntykaz at August 16, 2008 1:45 AM
Posted by: auntykaz at August 15, 2008 7:35 PM
Kaz, I think the worst road toll year was 1970 and the 1034 campaign started in 71.
The only reason my mates and I are alive apart from a lot of luck is that we never drank and drove. We street raced ( and I dont mean wanko 400 metre sprints) 180 kays over King street bridge one night. It helped that the car I was racing turned out to be driven by an off duty cop. Sure helped when the paddy wagon finally caught us in Queens road.
Brisbane to Melbourne 14.5 hours. Ahhh memories... memories.
Modern petrol heads dont know how easy they have got it. 110kw was big power then now they have 300+ That's enough to drive a block of flats fast.
And those lovely girls in their bright orange hot pants, mini skirts and panty girdles.
Pity about all the poor buggers that got themselves killed including 4 of my school mates.
rgds grego
Posted by: grego7 at August 16, 2008 12:03 AM
Posted by: waterbombe at August 15, 2008 9:40 PM - I'm with you girlfriend! Sometimes less is best.
Posted by: aqueousdb66 at August 15, 2008 11:59 PM
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet ?
Posted by: forevernow1 at August 15, 2008 11:13 PM
eatsrootsandleaves at August 15, 2008 3:31 PM I think the 32 should now be revised to 42, those at 32 are still on the teenage/20's list...
Posted by: auntykaz at August 15, 2008 7:35 PM
Yes Seatbelts was a biggie, by far the biggest advance was the drink driving laws though and mores the pity alcohol still is over 25% contributory.
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 10:56 PM
My big pooch has a seat belt when she rides in the car. 38kgs in the event of an accident would not be a good feeling. Plus she would be projected right out the front windscreen I would think. My car also has 8 airbags so I think they would be a bit of a shock if they all inflated at once. I hope it never happens, be a bit like being stuck in a bouncy castle I think.
Posted by: iaminperth at August 15, 2008 10:53 PM
Ive shut the door on yesterday
Its sorrows and mistakes
Ive locked within its gloomy walls
Past failures and heartaches
And now I throw the key away
To seek another room
And furnish it with love and smiles
And every spring time bloom
No thought shall enter this abode
That has a hint of pain
And every malice and mistrust
Shall never therein reign
Ive shut the door on yesterday
And thrown the key away
Tommorrow holds no doubts for me
Since I have found TODAY
Posted by: country47 at August 15, 2008 10:52 PM
Hear, hear, piscesgirl. I have my faith - I know what it is, I live my life according to it, I am not ashamed of it and I feel no need to defend it. Others may believe whatever they choose - just don't try to tell me what to believe, or not to believe.
As it happens, both my sons are atheists but I don't love them any the less for that (and I might add, nor does Jesus :) ). A little bit of tolerance goes a long way. After all, nobody is ever going to prove the point one way or another, so why bother arguing? To me it has no more "point" than fighting over how many angels can fit on the head of a pin, as medieval scholars apparently did. Wow, did they need to get out more.
And stating that religion causes violence is no different from stating that being male causes violence. Some men and some religious adherents are violent, some aren't. You can't blame a religion for its followers' shortcomings, any more than you can chop off men's goolies because some blokes let the side down!
Posted by: missrule at August 15, 2008 9:53 PM
Marcus, I did not say "behaviour is taught to children" and I agree with you that is not how or where their moral sense comes from.
Like Stu, you have not read what I said. Instead, you have heard what I did not say. This stuff is difficult to explain, especially to people with firmly entrenched ideologies such as yourself and Stu. A blog is not the place to do it, it would require a book, so I'll leave it alone.
Posted by: waterbombe at August 15, 2008 9:40 PM
piscesgirl56 at August 15, 2008 6:49 PM
It's very important to respect freedom of expression The freedom to articulate a point of view is fundamental to our highly evolved and effective system.
With that freedom comes the price that ideas you espouse may be critically examined and conclusions drawn. This examination and selection and rejection of things is responsible for our highly effective social system. It is quite legitimate to make comment on peoples different belief or customs and if sometimes those seem harsh, and happen on the RSVP blog so be it.
As a good example of this someone might consider you have chosen an astrological symbol for your profile name. Despite there being not a shred of evidence or rationality in favor of any of the astrological pronouncements people are still being taken in by this Babylonian era astronomical fraud. You have suggested that men from only 5 of the 12 'signs' are your suitable sexual partners. I find it remarkably soft headed that a lonely, 21st century post. grad level, material girl would ostensibly rule out 7/12 of the male population because of this quackery that has invaded your brain. Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 15, 2008 8:20 PM
Waterbombe@5.08...I have an Italian pal who named his pooch "deo"......
Posted by: ssshhh at August 15, 2008 8:09 PM
Well l would have to say that riding in cars without seatbelts was probably not that great on reflection.
I remember one year the advertising slogan for road safety was "declare war on 1034".
That is the number of people who had died on Victorian roads the previous year.
I think it was very early 70's possibly late 60's. No seatbelts in the car my dad drove, a wee blue Fiat.
One would have to say that is one "remember when" moment l am glad is not around now.
Piscesgirl, whilst my religious beliefs / faith is non existant, you and anyone else have the right to those beliefs, certainly.
As l have said before, the comfort that religion gives some people is obviously a positive for them. That it doesn't for me is inconsequential to anyone but me..............K
Posted by: auntykaz at August 15, 2008 7:35 PM
Posted by: dadofdave at August 15, 2008 12:43 AM
dad if you read enough of these blogs you will note that a couple of the bloggers take perverse delight in seeing how they can turn the direction of the blogs to any point they wish to aim it. Any efforts to return to the Original topic, will be met with some form of personal insult and a further effort to change the subject again.
Sad life isnt it ?
You are right Pisces(piscesgirl56 at August 15, 2008 6:49 PM) but some people are simply best ignored!
Posted by: waternymph47 at August 15, 2008 7:34 PM
as I said, I am new to RSVP...I joined the communities in hope that I can exchange ideas, opinion and experiences with similar minded adults in a civil way.
I just shared my experience and opinion with you all, I believed, in a non judgemental, non abusive, non critical way. And I truly respect the fact that others think differently, it does not say anything about me as a person or them as individuals.
However, when somebody feels the need to become arrogant, aggressively defensive of his/her opinion/values/believes, when he'she feels the need to attack personally and to try to put down those who disagree with them,when differences are viewed as treat rather than what they are - just differences, that's when one can have a clear idea where these individuals stand with their own positive sense of self worth... people with healthy self esteem do not need to engage in power games, they do not need to use aggression to prove themselves or protect their opinion, they do not need to put others down to feel better about themselves : they are open towards others with positive attitude and healthy curiousity. What a boring world would this be if we would all be the same and think the same and have the same values and believes??? There is a huge potential for growth in differences, we should not fear them!
Posted by: piscesgirl56 at August 15, 2008 6:49 PM
waterflambe at August 15, 2008 5:06 PM
If you are discussing the origins of human virtue or our moral sense I don't think you are understanding where, how and why it has evolved. It ha cutural overlay of mores and behaviour is taught to children but that is not how or where their moral sense comes from. A moments reflection rather than obeying your 'attack the downed bloke' instinct (Stu) might have you wondering where then did the parents get their sense from. Our society depends on moral behaviour. Society was not invented by reasoning men. It evolved as part of our genes It is much a product of our genes as our bodies are. You have to look inside brains at the instincts for creating and exploiting the social bonds that are there and see how the competitive business of evolution can give rise to cooperative instincts. It took about a billion years for genes to form cooperative teams, a million years for our ancestors to form cooperative societies and about the last thousand years for us to 'see' our societies and their origins.
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 15, 2008 6:15 PM
Kurli....at your age, you look stunning and gorgeous, I wished myself in 25 years from now, same looks as you are....lovely :)
Posted by: exoticorigin at August 15, 2008 5:56 PM
hi stuart i remember all that it was great wasnt it . what about cracker night and getting six of the best from the headmaster or the local policeman booting you up the arse and telling you go home didnt do me any harm .also there where no teenage gangs then the law has a lot to answer for
Posted by: chad1958 at August 15, 2008 5:36 PM
Did you hear about the dyslexic man who walked into a bra? Posted by: willow29 at August 15, 2008 1:23 PM . lol, Willow. Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac who laid awake at night wondering if there was a dog?
Posted by: waterbombe at August 15, 2008 5:08 PM
"All that has been posed is that values are passed down from generation to generation"....Stu, this is not what I said. Have another read because you misunderstood it. I think you might have your own ideas so firmly fixed in your mind that it will be difficult for you to see an alternative viewpoint....that's not a put down, but I think it is something that is standing in your way. You will have to remove that obstacle before you can see that other people have a valid point of view (valid, even if you don't agree). The beginning of morality has nothing to do with rules or principles being handed from generation to generation. It has to do with care being given to the child. Now I'd just type what I typed before so if you are interested you could re-read it.
Posted by: waterbombe at August 15, 2008 5:06 PM
ERAL@3.31pm:
No wonder I'm not having any success on RSVP.......
only dinosaurs left ,vegetating in front of tv.
Looks like I'm doomed to life alone!
Posted by: kurli at August 15, 2008 5:02 PM
Willow....yep...still remember the original list, it was posted last year, by Jenjen57. I still got sharped memories so far so good.
Posted by: exoticorigin at August 15, 2008 4:47 PM
Now do a man's list ERAL :P
Posted by: willow29 at August 15, 2008 4:21 PM
ERAL@3.31pm Hey, I still want the original list!
Posted by: willow29 at August 15, 2008 4:16 PM
Exotic, I can't think of that song without thinkng of Mr Bean!
Posted by: willow29 at August 15, 2008 4:04 PM
What Women Want in a Man
Original List:
1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover
What Women Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)
1. Nice looking
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week
What Women Want in a Man, Revised List (age 52)
1. Not too ugly
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends
What Women Want in a Man, Revised List (age 62)
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5. Doesn't retell the same joke too ma ny times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends
What Women Want in a Man, Revised List (age 72)
1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it's the weekend
What Women Want in a Man, Revised List (age 82)
1. Breathing
2. Doesn't miss the toilet.
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 15, 2008 3:31 PM
dadofdave August 15, 2008 12:43 AM
"Marcus, you really aught to do some homework son.
Argue your opinion as much as you like, but at least find a library and do some reading in Religious History 101 and leave assertions out of it. As you've particularly taken aim at the Christian religion you might start with the likes of Josephus et al and then move on to the other major religions. You might also put some effort into reading at least some basic religious archaeology texts... blah blah blah"
Thanks for that DOD. One of the basic principles iinvolved in a blog critique is spelling out and then challenging, correcting or providing an alternative to the offending viewpoint. I'm quite open to changing my view when the evidence changes, in line with a rational, scientific approach
You have posted an attack on me, suggested I need to do this or that but given no detail on where you think my fact or logic is faulty, and provided no alternative information.
A bit like the systems you are apearing to defend; all bluster, assertion and threat but no evidence of any kind for the central tenet.
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 15, 2008 3:28 PM
Hi Creativestuart....your post to Dear God...
.....Alleluia....Alleluia....Alleelluuiaa.....
Posted by: exoticorigin at August 15, 2008 3:25 PM
P.S. I think we end up hijacking blogs because ultimately we are all here to find partners, ....all enjoy the camaraderie and sometimes the actual on topic discussions don't take us long.
what he said! :)
Posted by: willow29 at August 15, 2008 2:49 PM
grego7 - it also depends on how highly you rate the bible
Posted by: metalscott at August 15, 2008 2:22 PM
Posted by: waterbombe at August 15, 2008 10:57 AM
WB, absolutely correct. It was not good sense for the Romans to execute Christ because it did not eliminate civil unrest in the province.
rgds grego
Posted by: grego7 at August 15, 2008 1:56 PM
P.S. I think we end up hijacking blogs because ultimately we are all here to find partners, are all a little lonely, all enjoy the camaraderie and sometimes the actual on topic discussions don't take us long.
Like this one we very quickly all disagreed and then almost accidentally found something more controversial / interesting to discuss. :-)
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 1:51 PM
CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL THE KIDS WHO WERE BORN IN THE
1920's, 30's 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's !!
First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us and lived in houses made of asbestos.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes or cervical cancer.
Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with bright colored lead-based paints.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets or shoes, not to mention, the risks some of us took hitchhiking.
As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a Ute on a warm day was always a special treat.
We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.
Take away food was limited to fish and chips, no pizza shops, McDonalds, KFC, Subway or Red Rooster.
Even though all the shops closed at 6.00pm and didn't open on the weekends, somehow we didn't starve to death!
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.
We could collect old drink bottles and cash them in at the corner store and buy Fruit Tingles and some fire crackers to blow up frogs and lizards with.
We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soft drinks with sugar in it, but we weren't overweight because......
WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. We built tree houses and cubby houses and played in creek beds with matchbox cars.
We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape or DVD movies, no surround sound, no mobile phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms..........WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no Lawsuits from these accidents.
Only girls had pierced ears!
We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.
You could only buy Easter Eggs and Hot Cross buns at Easter time.......no really!
We were given BB guns and sling shots for our 10th birthdays,
We drank milk laced with Strontium 90 from cows that had eaten grass covered in nuclear fallout from the atomic testing at Maralinga in 1956.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them!
Mum didn't have to go to work to help dad make ends meet!
Footy had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!
Our teachers used to belt us with big sticks and leather straps and bully's always ruled the playground at school.
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!
Our parents got married before they had children and didn't invent stupid names for their kids like "Kiora" and "Blade".....
This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
The past 70 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned
HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL! And YOU are one of them! CONGRATULATIONS!
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated our lives for our own good.
And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.
Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it?!
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 1:44 PM
aqueousdb66 at August 15, 2008 1:22 PM
Whenever I have docked sheep I have always done it with a tiny rubber band
And muelsing has never been done anywhere I have been involved! I agree that is a barbaric practice.
Exasperating.... I many here have belief and religion all mixed up!
Stoic hardly, it is my passion for discovering the truth that has me question.
And also to ask people to offer an alternative not pick on what someone says or believes if they don't agree..
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 1:38 PM
aqueousdb66 at August 15, 2008 12:43 PM
I agree that religion was criticized for it's abuse and shortcomings (many of which I believe should be called to question and indeed many of which I think are extreme and wrong) Thus I agree with religion having many shortcomings. Indeed my more recent experience with "religions" is a lot like piscesgirl56. In general terms with many religions I see a lot of words and not much positive action.
And whilst there has been some lively discussion. Mixing up belief and religion.
There has been some balanced and very interesting points of view, and some not so..
There has however not been an alternative view on the basis of morality being "to some sort of belief" posed.
All that has been posed is that values are passed down from generation to generation
Which is exactly what religion does with the belief in their chosen God and/or prophet's teachings. (yes sometimes with shortcomings or incorrect personal agendas)
Values still require an alternative start point if not belief in some higher being.
Just as Greg said, "that you cannot "centre around" something but must "centre on". Revolve around perhaps although beliefs are better centered than revolving"
I am not saying that anyone else is wrong with what they have said, but I don’t see any alternative yet.
I am ultimately just having people think…
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 1:30 PM
Did you hear about the dyslexic man who walked into a bra?
Posted by: willow29 at August 15, 2008 1:23 PM
Really Stu, you are exasperating! But the Letter to God from the Dog has made me laugh.
Sheep, although having their tails docked in the same way as dogs, experience much more barbaric treatment (over and above their systematic slaughter). Mulesing entails running a knife around the area to remove the wool bearing skin. The reason for this painful and cruel practice is the lifetime protection against blowfly, which incidently can be more humanely controlled by crutching. There is no research to indicate successful mulesing. No one would argue a flyblown sheep is a very distressing sight and absolutely horrendous, but the premise: to mutilate ‘just in case’ is not acceptable. Mulesing is a lazy farming practice.
Forget peace!
Posted by: aqueousdb66 at August 15, 2008 1:22 PM
I love the dog letter, Stuart.
Posted by: willow29 at August 15, 2008 1:03 PM
Posted by: piscesgirl56 at August 14, 2008 9:16 PM - It is telling me that God is a living positive spiritual force in human soul - some people are sensitive to His 'voice' (these people are naturally positive, loving and non judgemental) others have successfully supressed this inner 'voice' (they are the negative forces in this world regardless of their religion)...
Are you not being as invective as you claim others are being by this comment. We all have the right to our opinions and the RSVP moderators have the right to veto these opinions if they choose.
Posted by: dadofdave at August 15, 2008 12:43 AM - If Marcus et al want to sink the boot into others' belief systems my challenge to them is to either do their homework and at least get the basic facts straight (instead of being armchair experts)...
Why don't you enlighten us DD? With your education i would expect a clear and concise reply without the need for verbosity. The orginal discussion arose because Stu asked for an alternative view, which was provided however he seems unable to acknowledge this. Stoic perhaps?
Posted by: aqueousdb66 at August 15, 2008 12:43 PM
I agree with the last posting.
Please play nice and stick to the topics.
I love to read your postings but log off when it gets off the topic.
Please don't give me a verbal upper cut for this posting as it is a serious turn off for me and not for you.
However just want to remind my dear sweet co bloggers that there is a feedback button over there :::::::::::::::::::>>>>>>>>>>>>>
to your right and if you tell the mouse that runs the server to tell the wizard of oz that runs this site what you want to debate I have a feeling you will get your wish.
Peace out xxxxxxxxxlove you allxxxxxxxbe kind to each otherxxxxxxxxxxxxand stick to the subject and I will forever be your co bloggers for as long as I remain on this site xxxx peace out xxx
Posted by: amourmoi08 at August 15, 2008 12:41 PM
LETTER to GOD From: The Dog
Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another? How can they get to know one another?
Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?
Dear God: Why do you have cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around in a car? We dogs do love a nice car ride! Would it be so hard to rename the “Chrysler Eagle” the “Chrysler Beagle”?
Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?
Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?
Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog:
1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it, or after they throw it up.
2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way these dead things smell.
3. I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box, although they are tasty.
4. The garbage bin is not a cookie jar.
5. The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom and Dad's laps.
6. The garbage collector is not actually stealing our stuff.
7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
8. When the officer reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration, I will not bit his hand
9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
10. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello".
11. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.
12. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house --- not after.
13. I will not throw up in the car.
14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt across the carpet.
15. When we have company, I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch
16. The cat is not a “squeaky toy”, so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.
And, finally, my last question:
Dear God: Why do humans only have 10 Commandments But dogs have 16?
PS Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back? Please?
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 12:22 PM
How comical - a blog simultaneously running along two themes : GOD; and DOG .
Perhaps we have some dyslexic bloggers here ?
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at August 15, 2008 12:03 PM
lambs still have their tails docked for sanitary reasons, otherwise you would have to be cleaning them all the time.
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 11:58 AM
Posted by: aqueousdb66 at August 14, 2008 2:37 PM . You got my point exactly, aqueous. It is the family that, through love and care, creates a predisposition for good moral actions in children. Children who are warmly attached to the people in their families treat other kids well in general, and as they mature, they continue to treat others well (with small abberations from time to time, naturellement).
Grego, re your quiz, I think the incorrect bit is "good sense". And I will no longer "centre around", that clearly shows lack of focus, committment and dedication. I will, from now on, centre on. ;-)
Posted by: waterbombe at August 15, 2008 10:57 AM
I agree malsie,
Although such debates are interesting, people have personal beliefs that are important to them.
Questioning another's beliefs (and even making fun of them) can often be construed as a personal attack. We all have our reasons why we believe in a God, or higher power in any religion, or conversely choose not to believe.
This doesn't make us "right" or bad or stupid or even unreasonable, just different to each other.
As long as our beliefs don't result in us being cruel, unkind or cause us to mentally or physically hurt someone else, why does it really matter?
Posted by: amberlight58 at August 15, 2008 10:42 AM
I can remember as a child my grandfather docking the tails of the little Fox Terriers he bred. Seems this was what was expected back then. Seemed an awful thing to do.
Thank goodness times have changed! Although lambs still have their tails docked.
Posted by: amberlight58 at August 15, 2008 10:32 AM
Dogs obviously use their tails as some form of expression, so what a cruel thing to do to deny them that.
I have found the "religion" debate interesting, even though it may be boring to others (but then again there are many things on here that get discussed that are boring to me and I just merrily skip through those posts...). I have found from experience, though, that no amount of debate on the subject will ever change another person's mind and turn a "non believer" into a "believer" and vice versa.
Only personal experience makes a difference (ie Pisces' story below - and btw, thanks for sharing that, Pisces, I really enjoyed reading it and understood totally where you were coming from).
Posted by: malsie at August 15, 2008 10:15 AM
Posted by: piscesgirl56 at August 14, 2008 9:16 PM
Thank you for sharing your experiences Pisces. I felt the JOY when reading it. I love what you wrote here...
"when somebody talks about God or the Lord Jesus in disrespectful way, I feel pain in my soul - but I know, people talk like that because they do not know...faith has no real worth unless it is based on experience, on KNOWING as opposed to believeing only."
I feel pain in my soul also.
Which is WHY I answered this " I am not getting into a religious debate here".... because I KNOW what happens when we open up this can of worms...lol..and yes I could see it was going to take us WAY off topic. And yes I DO feel a pain in my soul.
Starry, do you think that a belief in God or the New Age equivalent 'the Universe' is needed for us to be good?
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 12, 2008 12:14 PM
I am not getting into a religious debate on here. I am a Catholic and try my best, to follow the basics of my religion. But in saying that, I also follow the basic principles of Buddhism, although to me, The Five Precepts are a lot harder to adhere to, than the 10 Commandments...lol.
Posted by: starryeyez at August 12, 2008 2:55 PM
I thank everybodies differing opinions on the subject (even yours, my dear friend Marcus, who I do consider an online friend) but can we please put this to rest?
Posted by: starryeyez at August 15, 2008 10:12 AM
Cocker Spaniels are another breed that have traditionally have their tails removed.
I am so glad my little girl hasn't had hers done. Whilst it does need brushing weekly and like the rest of her trimming from time to time, it is a lovely tail and always wagging too.
It is barbaric removing them.
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 9:03 AM
Historically docking (in some breeds) was carried out for various reasons that are no longer valid today. Examples of this are for hunting dogs - the prey can't grab the ears or tail to use against the dog and dog fighting - for the same reason. Both, in my mind, deplorable practices. It is legal to dock tails in other states and show them in Victoria, but is still frowned upon. Thank goodness. What is more rewarding than a wagging tail?
Posted by: willow29 at August 15, 2008 9:02 AM
iaminperth at August 14, 2008 10:09 PM
I actually agree with most of what you have said about religion, especially the public faces of it.
But isn't that almost an exact reflection of how most of society is? (again I speak generally)
We have become and also guided towards being super consumers and looking after ourselves, what can I get sort of attitude more than ever.
Don't believe me? Ask the service clubs how their membership is going.
In the last year the Country Women's association have closed in my little town due to dwindiling numbers and being so over regulated that what little money they made was being swallowed up by room rentals and law compliances.
The modern world has great convenience, but we have been taught to want and take so much that we are loosing the things that matter.
I don't mean people are becomming "bad" just a little self centered, or so busy in the must consume world (work, spend, work, spend cycle) that family life and time spent actually with other people, the simple things that give life real meaning have suffered.
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 8:56 AM
laughsandtalks at August 14, 2008 11:52 PM
Marcus you started the religious/beliefs discussion when you questioned Starry's beliefs
I then asked you to offer a viable alternative rather than blindly picking on others beliefs.
Cheers
Stuart
starryeyez August 12, 2008 8:05 AM
Starry, do you think that a belief in God or the New Age equivalent 'the Universe' is needed for us to be good?
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 12, 2008 12:14 PM
Posted by: creativestuart at August 15, 2008 8:44 AM
Hi Marcus, Yes, Shepherds just adore their owners. Originally being sheep dogs he would have simply stayed with the herd. Such a shame the breed is so misunderstood at times. She gsd is a care dog/blind dog and everything else dog in Europe. They are also now being used instead of the St. Bernard in rescues after being found to travel further and be stronger and also much more persistent in their task. They are also police dogs as most people see them and are highly trained to do this task which they love, again totally pleasing their owners. Docking of tails, I believe is now illegal as it was only ever done for cosmetic reasons and deemed to be cruelty, which I tend to believe it is. Chopping off a piece of a body because someone believes it looks better is so offensively cruel perpetuated again my human beings.
Posted by: iaminperth at August 15, 2008 8:14 AM
Posted by: iaminperth at August 14, 2008 10:48 PM
yep i agree iaminperth, its easy enough to sort out at the first meeting whos paying for what. stay long enough for 2 drinks/coffees and pay for a round each.
anyone who then insists on paying can do so, but that is certainly not my intention going in.
Posted by: kisskat at August 15, 2008 8:03 AM
piscesgirl56 at August 14, 2008 9:16 PM
For what it's worth I agree Pisces. It's difficult to see the logic in a blog that started out to discuss "Does time really tell" and got highjacked by this diatribe about religion; nor to see the justification for the invective. If people want to have a "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" style blog on religion it wouldn't hurt them to at least do some homework and get it right. In fact, it would be preferable to do it in a dedicated blog, so that those who want to stay on topic can.
As one who walked away from half a lifetime of 'church' and its enculturated abuse, I have no illusions about the shortcomings of religion; but this discussion has turned into an exercise in invective. Earlier in the blog there were assertions about the historicity vs mythology of Jesus Christ, comparisons of various religions and their most well-known figures, and assertions about the acts of the various religions throughout history.
Like you Pisces I generally keep my religious views to myself and don't proselytise. But this blog has really gone over the top. A diversity of views is good for a society or a small group of bloggers, but fair dinkum Marcus, you really aught to do some homework son.
Argue your opinion as much as you like, but at least find a library and do some reading in Religious History 101 and leave assertions out of it. As you've particularly taken aim at the Christian religion you might start with the likes of Josephus et al and then move on to the other major religions. You might also put some effort into reading at least some basic religious archaeology texts. Then when you have a better command of valid literature you'll be rather better equipped and informed to argue your view which, by then, may well have changed.
It was said earlier in this blog that the reason that intelligent people believe dumb things (or words to that effect) is that they are more skilled at defending their belief. Well, they don't get skilled by grandstanding but by doing their homework. I've worked in the banking and construction industries, and now in education research; I have a post-graduate education, but I'm still just a working class boy who got some breaks over time and made the effort to make the most of them - I did my homework. And I maintain an "experience based" faith in the God of the Bible. It doesn't matter whether we agree or not, but it does matter whether the discussion is informed and whether it is motivated by a desire to tear down or build up. So far it's been mostly invective interspersed with some efforts to lift it.
If Marcus et al want to sink the boot into others' belief systems my challenge to them is to either do their homework and at least get the basic facts straight (instead of being armchair experts), or let those who've been trying to discuss the original topic of the blog get back to it.
Don't know if I've helped your cause or not Pisces, but at least you're not "a voice crying in the wilderness" (for what it's worth).
Posted by: dadofdave at August 15, 2008 12:43 AM
Pooches
I thought of you yesterday when I heard about the bloke that fell headfirst into a pile hole trying to rescue his little mut. He died, the dog survived. On the newspaper vid they showed him being wheeled away under a shroud, the hole and about 20 seconds of the dog doing doggy things, all in a 27 second take. There was another story about a shepherd that sat beside it's master for 6 weeks after he suicided in the middle of nowhere. Last night while out I saw a guy walking 2 of a breed I didn't recognise (like a small ridgey?, maybe more Wiemeraner sp?) in Brunswick St. Both were young dogs and had their tails docked which I understand to be illegal in Victoria.
I think the thing that started the religious flavor of this thread was a creativestuart comment and his concern not with finding a missus but the lowering moral standards of the young due to non church attendance.. Anyway the girls have given up on Stu and now the drone is getting the attention.
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 14, 2008 11:52 PM
yeah, "No soup for you !!!"
Posted by: aquamanda56 at August 14, 2008 11:36 PM
It is interesting about how differently people think about gender roles when it comes about paying for the expenses of a date. Personally I like equality in relationships and to be honest, I feel akward when the man pays for everything. It does not feel right somehow - why should a man be financially affected just because he is a man? In fact, having all these unsuccessful dates might cost men a fortune, while us women just enjoy the experiences...these rules are part of social norms, I understand, still they do not feel right. My way of feeling less guilty: I never go out for a meal with a person I do not know, I prefer just a plain coffee time. Later on if the relationship would develop into something more than a friendhsip, I believe any man would accept that I like to pay for my own expenses... I find it amusing how we all have different ideas about these cultural norms...
Posted by: piscesgirl56 at August 14, 2008 11:26 PM
although, you'd think, logically, I would have returned, ( maybe I need some advice on my profile )
Posted by: hobart212hal2000 at August 14, 2008 11:16 PM
Willow, it's an absolute joke isn't it. All these rules and regulations, who pays for a cup of coffee who doesn't. I can't believe how controlling some people are. I mean if you can't afford a cup of coffee there's really not a lot of hope left for you. I just can't believe that people are so petty and spend their time even thinking aobut it. Frankly if the person I was with was sitting there brooding over a couple of dollars I would be out of there so quickly so bored and thankfully never meet them again.
Posted by: iaminperth at August 14, 2008 10:48 PM
no, I haven't returned, I just forgot my hat, oh, there it is
Posted by: hobart212hal2000 at August 14, 2008 10:46 PM
LOL Perth, does it matter? Its not even supposed to be a blog on religion, its supposed to be how long it takes to form a "connection" with someone. We all wander off and do our own thing and someone reminds us again what the topic is.
Maybe we can get a trapdoor and when our date doesnt match our instant attraction, we press a button and whooosh, there he/she goes.... NEXT! Of course that's before the coffee gets ordered so there's no need to argue who is going to pay :)
Posted by: willow29 at August 14, 2008 10:30 PM
Marcus, Id say many people who have positive outlooks enjoy good mental health :)
Posted by: willow29 at August 14, 2008 10:20 PM
Come on Marcus, Say something. Everyone is trying to present themselves as so pure and self righteous here and it's simply not true and not any kind of reality. We all stuff up at times and quite often simply because we are human and we can allow ourselves to make mistakes at times. This self righteous puritanical view of a lot of people on her is just rubbish, total rubbish.,
Posted by: iaminperth at August 14, 2008 10:18 PM
I personally don't think that religion has anything to do with a belief in god or anyone else. Religion is based on power by secular groups nothing else and were borne out of greed and war. Today that people can kill, rape and molest is a sign of decay of religion. Religion today is based on greed, nothing else, simply and purely greed and has nothing to do with the teachings in the bible or anywhere else for that matter. I tend to believe that any religion, and the they all do, covers the abuse of children or anyone else for their own gain is perverted and sick. Religion today is capitalistic and has nothing to do with the bible or anything else. And if there is an imaginary person sitting in the sky overlooking it all he/she must be totally appalled.
Posted by: iaminperth at August 14, 2008 10:09 PM
Piscesgirl, thank you for sharing your experience. Whatever works for an individual for his/her betterment and well being is always a good thing.
Posted by: willow29 at August 14, 2008 9:45 PM
I am reading all these comments for and against religion and I feel I cannot stay silent. My background: I was raised as an atheist, my parents ensured me there was no God and they told me only uneducated and stupid people believed in God...I learned to hate religious people...I was 33 when all possible disasters hit me and my family. I was emotinally crushed, I was physically ill, depressed, negative, and without motivation to live...then one day a stranger stopped me in the streets and told me this (still remember the words) " God loves you...He wants to build you up, listen to His call.." Those words hit me at that time, normally this kind of talk would have made me angry...it felt good to hear that 'somebody' loved me and cared for me...I was not sure who He was, so that night I went to the garden and I lifted my face to the stars and said" God, if you exist, you sure can show me who you are and reveal yourself to me...YOU LEAD ME - if you exist I do not need anyone to teach me..." That was the start of my completely new life style: the changes within me were spiritual, gradual, I had to do nothing special, I have just changed from inside - I do not know how...I have never been depressed since, all my health problems stopped, I became a positive, hopeful, joyful person...there were some serious challenges in my life after that as well, by my strong faith helped me through everything with positive attitude and hope...I was active in different churches, but I was dissapointed to learn that most judgment and negativity was actually in church congregations...people were fighting for 'positions' (power), they believed they were the 'good' ones and non believers were the bad ones...my faith is on spirirual level, EXPERIENCE based, which was not built on my parents' believes or others believes, it's uniquely mine and is the main source of my inner strength, sense of self worth, and genuine love for people...my faith manifests through my life style - I do not 'preach' to people about God, do not try to convert anybody, and I do NOT want a partner who is active in church...whenever I am stressed, anxious or confused - I listen to some special worship songs which lift me up effortlessly...for ME Jesus is a reality, He is alive: He is not a silly trouble maker, he is not in the heavens, He is a POSITIVE, powerful spiritual force deep WITHIN me, not outside me...and I believe it is very wrong saying God is not a reality because of the bad things people have done in His name: we forget the people factor here, we forget that God would not be a loving force if He would control human behavior...good or bad behavior is a result of HUMAN CHOICES - FREE WILL , and has nothing to do with God...I met more positive people among non believers than among believers, more fake people in church than outside church...it does not prove anything about God it tells more about human nature. It is telling me that God is a living positive spiritual force in human suol - some people are sensitive to His 'voice' (these people are naturally positive, loving and non judgemental) others have successfully supressed this inner 'voice' (they are the negative forces in this world regardless on their religion)...I had some extraordinary spiritual inner experiences during times of big emotional trials which I can never really explain to anybody : i never knew the meaning of the word "JOY" until I experienced it in the middle of biggest trauma of my life - when my young son had a serious sporting accident...ever since than, when somebody talks about God or the Lord Jesus in disrespectful way, I feel pain in my soul - but I know, people talk like that because they do not know...faith has no real worth unless it is based on experience, on KNOWING as opposed to believeing only...normally I would not get into any discussion about God, few people around me actually know that my faith is my rock. This time I felt I had to speak up - even if I get 'crucified' for that...some people out there might start to think differently about God, maybe they will recognise that there might be more to our humanity than just our bodies and things that can be scientifically proven...
Posted by: piscesgirl56 at August 14, 2008 9:16 PM
missrule at August 14, 2008 6:29 PM
Contact me off line.Stuff is not going through. I have a plethora of information on the topic.
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at August 14, 2008 8:49 PM
I think there has to been an attraction from the word go when you meet: either it be physcial or mental as one or the other is good, if there's both then it's GREAT. I like to give people a fair chance but if there is neither of the
I hope this gets through, its classic!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hVD7BfStmfU&feature=related
Posted by: willow29 at August 20, 2008 12:36 PM