RSVP Blog
Conversation Pieces
You've recently agreed to a date or perhaps you've decided to venture out with a group of single friends for a bit of mingling and you've spotted potential. A significant element requires attention: The conversation starter! And we're not after stale pick-up lines here! Starting a conversation with a stranger or someone you don't know too well can be daunting for most people.
What topics are best and which ones must you steer clear of to avoid an awkward silence? The first conversation usually creates a lasting impression, so unsurprisingly, the pressure is on! What is safe to discuss during the glorified "first conversation"? Are there things that you should/shouldn't talk about? How important is the first conversation to you? Tell us about your experiences, whether successful or downright embarrassing!
Posted by July 8, 2008 11:45 AM
Latest Comments
waterbombe at 10:08 AM: Congrats on sneaking it in, the second time. A bit pointless, as my post that you were answering had just been chopped, as soon as everyone had read it.
Anyhow, enjoy having the last (and only) word - until I send you your own special personal signed copy of mine, off-blog.
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 18, 2008 12:25 AM
Lores Bonney at 2:45 PM and earlier: The real-life version goes
1) You're right: Daughter = Baby Doll,
2) Wife = "Not tonight dear, I have a headache" - and Panadol to prove it.
3) Mistress - any doll with arms and legs that move.
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 18, 2008 12:13 AM
bm1960@8.06pm:
Strange as it may seem to younger generations,some of those 46year plus relationships had a helluva lot going for them.
We actually ENJOYED and appreciated our significant other.
As Maurice Chevalier sang in GIGI in the 1960's: "Thank god I'm not young anymore"
(I rest my case)
Posted by: kurli at July 17, 2008 9:47 PM
I commented ages ago about age things and was shot down in flames, and insulted, by a regular blog-hogger...so, I probably better not even try to express myself in case he attacks yet again. Suffice to say, I work with people whose marriages average 45 years....that is not how my generation does things, sadly. They must have done something well to have stayed together all that time.....
Cheers,
B.
Posted by: bm1960 at July 17, 2008 8:06 PM
playful helen@3.52pm:
Trust me my dear........if you've had a truly wonderful relationship with your man,and supposing that he follows the Australian average and dies before you...........you will NEED a good and loving man in your life sooner than your friends deem "correct".
Whatever.........it's your life! Your decision!
Posted by: kurli at July 17, 2008 7:27 PM
Playfulhelen@3.52pm.
Thank you, that is another post that should be cut and pasted, maybe then women might realise that a lot of older men think that women from 65 to 80 can be beautiful.
Benajiman Franklin was quoted that no woman under the age of 60 was worth bedding. The problem is that a lot of women think that an older man has nothing to offer them. You give hope to reason. Thank you.
Cheers OG
Posted by: oldergent at July 17, 2008 5:11 PM
egernia@10.15am
I'm 47 and my partner is ten years older. We met 3 years ago when he 'kissed' me on RSVP; he was outside my age range and I wouldn't have spotted him. But his photo had a beautiful smile, and I liked the way he flirted (it was spring! :-) and when we met for the first time, we talked for six hours. The age difference worried me at first but it hasn't been a huge issue... there's still enough overlap. Physically he's not all that fit, and I am more active than him generally, but he's a wonderful, virile lover - no problems there. It does concern me that if we stay together, I will likely have a long, long time alone when I lose him. But I still choose him.
I don't know about 15-20 years difference - starts to be more like a generation. Though I know one couple who've been together over 20yrs and the woman is 18 years older. I see no need to criticise.... which has just made me realise how biased my views are!
Posted by: playfulhelen at July 17, 2008 3:52 PM
Thanks nw @2.29, especially your final para. What's been disturbing me here is the mean-spirited or spiteful nature of some comments (particularly against middle-aged women). The truth is we will all get old, less capable and attractive, and superfluous to the young. So how's about some camaderie, charity or even chivalry on the way, to value the best in each other?
And ladies - women - even, dare I say, wimmin!! :-) if you need a lift, hie on down to see Mamma Mia, the film. A riotous celebration of lively older femmes.
smiles,
pH
Posted by: playfulhelen at July 17, 2008 3:42 PM
MT@12.50pm
Probably because "he" gave her the headache in the first place? VBG!
(uh oh.......I didnt say that did I? :-)
Posted by: kurli at July 17, 2008 2:45 PM
waterbombe at July 17, 2008 9:54 AM
Naturalwoman, you're right. This constant bashing of middle aged women is meant to get you down. But don't listen to these disappointed old guys ... WB
WB...thanx..but..uh huh..not me..well..not today anyway!...just back from the market...and the hit of flirty glances that were directed at me.....(unless it was the 'natural blonde' behind me)!! ..hee hee..were fun and amusing to observe..so couldn't help smiling...maybe it was because my confidence was showing??
you know those days...where you throw yourself together.. you feel free.. ('cause the hormones are being kind for a change hehe...:( ..and it's the real you shining through from beneath the hormonal fog.....you can't help but look and feel great..your skins glowing...your smile is showing..you feel happy to be alive..and it shows..
no WB..these guys won't get me down or others..will they ladies?..just reading the blogs from the women here affirms how damn sassy and interesting we are.. and demonstrates how the insecure and anal male is intimidated by that...mmm ...some men on here are quite aware of their ..short c*mings..not to mention their penis envy issues..hehe..I think it affects their reasoning..!!
oh Marsha! and Co. .... Under the Influence of Hormones..we may be....but not of men who struggle with the characters of strong women..
in a perverse way..these blogs can be quite an affirming.. healthy and entertaining experience..if only the debates not be played in the gutter...
I know it's all been said before..but can't we step back from our egos and allow the stimulation of a healthy and fun debate to shine through rather than spirit destroying dark ramblings..being challenged is always a good thing..but without the aggro...I am sure many of us here value well contructed but also thoughts that come straight from the heart...nw x
Posted by: naturalwoman08 at July 17, 2008 2:29 PM
ROFLMAO - roll on floor - laugh my arse off.
(he he)
GLAB - Giggles, laughs, and blushes. (Thats me half the time.) Jen
Posted by: jenniferhi at July 17, 2008 1:35 PM
Kurli....funny
Panadol or some sort of sedative so we shut up!
Posted by: musicteacher at July 17, 2008 12:50 PM
Just to introduce a lighter note,..........
The three Dolls
in a man's life are:
1........His Daughter, 'Baby doll'
2.........His Girlfriend, 'Barbie doll'
Wait for it
3.....His Wife, 'Panadol'
Go on girls; admit it, even you laughed!!!
Posted by: kurli at July 17, 2008 12:33 PM
Ah, Marcus, I respond to illogical skewed arguments that put women down, and I get a fair amount of support for doing that too. I also post a lot of supportive comments about men...but not about sexist men. That's where you have a bit of trouble telling the difference, it seems. Probably you think all men would be sexist if only they saw things the right way!!! Ha ha. I bet you do!
But I don't have the time to be on here all day every day like you do...why isn't your social time inundated by much-younger women wanting your still-desirable body for its sperm count? How come you have so much time on your hands? Are your theories proving to have a few holes in them...surely not.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 17, 2008 10:16 AM
This is a lively debate and mostly from only a single perspective. A lot of assumption here that a young woman would not want an old man.
How about a younger woman, say 40ish wanting an older man, say 55yo. How would you all catergorize this 'relationship'?
Without reverting to the 'sugardaddy' syndrome/crap or the 'get-in-to-the-country-free' argument.
Posted by: egernia at July 17, 2008 10:15 AM
Response to timewarp1 at July 15, 2008 9:59 PM .
Timewarp, is that big brash bad waterbombe bashing you again...you do sound a bit like a victim talking about "all the other negative stuff that WB has been posting about me every few hours today". Using words like "I claim my right" is a wee bit pretentious, isn't it? You don't need to plant a flag, just write what you want, the blogs are free.
You did seem a tad self-righteous when you said "Well, you may think so, WB, in your role as a "femmo man hating pinko lefto whinging dominatrix" (your own self-description, later today.) "....Timey, I was making fun of myself. You completely missed that. Now I know that is due to your temper. You really do need to get that under control. That nice young man Marcus posted a picture of what you do when you get angry,...you"re like those Bombadier beetles, spraying nasty smelling hot air all over the place: (laughsandtalks at July 15, 2008 8:52 PM).
One last thing, Timey. Do you think you could be taking it all a bit too seriously? When you said to me "(My) disobedience which your 10.41am post suggests you hadn't even noticed", I thought to myself, well, maybe I didn't notice because I didn't care, and there's Timey getting himself all would up in his straps again over nothing.
Remember, Timey, you are here to meet a young lady, and what will she think when she sees you behaving like this? I can only caution you to think twice before you shout when you're angry...it isn't a good look. Now off with you to the shops, pick up some sedatives and a nice book, maybe a box of chocolates, and learn to relax, dear.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 17, 2008 10:08 AM
WTF? "From a man's point of view lifeless females are unlikely to elicit a man's best or even better, sexual performance." Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 16, 2008 10:32 PM . Another Freudian slip???
Naturalwoman, you're right. This constant bashing of middle aged women is meant to get you down. But don't listen to these disappointed old guys...instead, look at Troy and Grego, for example, both of whom have said they are in relationships with women their own age, and both of whom talk far more sense. In fact Troy said he had never been out with a younger woman, I think, and he sounds entirely happy, as does Grego. And there are a lot of really nice mid-life men on RSVP, I know one lovely one, and before I met him I met quite a few who were very happy with a woman their own age.
Marcus I wonder why you don't spend your time hooking up with with younger women instead of talking about hooking up with them ....it beats me. None of your examples come from reality, you notice. You are only talking theory. If it was true that men only wanted to partner with much younger women once they were in their fifties, we'd see the evidence everywhere...in shopping centres, at work, at the movies, etc. Instead you almost always see couples where the man and the woman are roughly the same age. The old man-young woman couple are noticeable by their rarity.
Whatever theoretical reasons Marcus puts up, this old man-young woman thing is not happening to any significant extent. The reason for that, I believe, is that most men have good sense. (Oh and could I just point out to the hard-of-hearing that saying most men have good sense is a positive comment about men)? Most men want a woman of their generation for the shared history. Many do not want a younger woman because she will either want kids or she will already have them and they don't want to live with kids again. That's what I heard, time and time again, in the 18 months I was on and off RSVP. So for all the argy bargy about how undesirable older women are, where's the evidence out there in the real world, in the shopping centres, at work, ? The evidence there is that middle aged women are in relationships if they want them. All Marcus can offer is theory, he can't offer evidence because it just doesn't stack up.
He'll probably come back with more theory or else examples of movie stars and powerful politicians coupling up with younger women, but they are not ordinary people living ordinary lives....I mean what sort of men are they....when it comes to the sort of people we are, the men are not like these men. In our age group there's plenty of men looking for women their own age. Most people are reasonably modest, realistic and decent, and that includes both men and women.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 17, 2008 9:54 AM
Posted by: auntykaz at July 16, 2008 8:34 PM
Kaz, I was hoping for a credit but competant sounds like a pass. I think that in some ways such an assessment on a public blog is dangerous because if is perceived as too accurate it endangers the privacy of the individual.
It was fun though and quite a challenge.
rgds grego
Posted by: grego7 at July 17, 2008 9:46 AM
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 16, 2008 7:42 PM
Marcus, no I am not WB's Adonis and in fact I dont think I am any sort of Adonis. Maybe 30 years ago but sadly not now.
WB has her own Adonis.
If I am Horus does that make you Set?
rgds grego
Posted by: grego7 at July 17, 2008 9:34 AM
Ogre at July 16, 2008 11:49 PM
The WB will respond to any semblance of reasonable comment that doesn't favor women. Do not expect it to be logical though. Funny perhaps. Last night any woman in her 50's who still wanted children was looking to do a Madonna and adopt, last week we were told her great, great granny eschewed a career in science to have 17 children.
Next week I expect to be told that as a male erection is the equipment of rape if I get one I should immediately see a police officer and a counsellor.
Kaz. My posts last night were chopped up on high very badly and lost continuity. The one you refer to was meant for beb & or am.
Chris. Are you there yet eh? I'm a shocker aren't I? You have a good memory-bloke shakes head slowly. Haha.
Lizards seem well. Male Waterdragon and the Bluetongues were out sunning for a few hours yesterday.
Cheers Marquisinho
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 17, 2008 9:10 AM
Male bashing?? Confuse me I have witnessed both sides of the bashing. But, the main thing is that we are all individuals. And some people in a relationship will always be more sensitive and weaker. I was in the marriage I was in. It is funny though the selfishness of individuals in a relationship is incredible, even when children are involved. It saddens me to see parents who are so focus on themselves and believe material gifts will make up for the lack of time they spend with them. This even occurs in couples, but parties spending huge amounts of time doing their thing instead of realising they should spend more time together.
Posted by: raphael1975 at July 17, 2008 4:19 AM
Congrats thelynathdiary at 0:51 PM: That's how you make valid points with the gender disparagement either muted or implicit, rather than inyerface.
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 17, 2008 12:05 AM
.. Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus...or Women are a Farce and Men a waste of Penis?????..
Posted by: naturalwoman08 at July 16, 2008 10:28 PM
How to change your oil -- Mars- and Venus-style
WOMEN:
1. Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 since the last oil change.
2. Drink a cup of coffee.
3. 15 minutes later, write a check and leave with a properly maintained vehicle.
MEN:
1. Go to O'Reilly auto parts and write a check for 50 dollars for oil, filter, oil lift (AKA kitty litter), hand cleaner and scented tree.
2. Discover that the used oil container is full. Instead of taking back to O'Reilly to recycle, dump in hole in backyard.
3. Open a beer and drink it.
4. Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.
5. Find jack stands under kid's pedal car.
6. In frustration, open another beer and drink it.
7. Place drain pan under engine.
8. Look for 9/16 box end wrench.
9. Give up and use crescent wrench.
10. Unscrew drain plug.
11. Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil; get hot oil on you in process.
12. Clean up.
13. Have another beer while oil is draining.
14. Look for oil filter wrench.
15. Give up; poke oil filter with Phillips screwdriver and twist it off.
16. Beer.
17. Buddy shows up; finish case with him. Finish oil change tomorrow.
18. Next day, drag pan full of old oil out from underneath car.
19. Throw oil lift (AKA kitty litter) on oil spilled during step 18.
20. Beer. No, drank it all yesterday.
21. Walk to 7-11; buy beer.
22. Install new oil filter making sure to apply thin coat of clean oil on gasket first
23. Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.
24. Remember drain plug from step 11.
25. Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan.
26. Hurry to replace drain plug before the whole quart of fresh oil drains onto floor.
27. Slip with wrench and bang knuckles on frame.
28. Bang head on floor board in reaction.
29. Begin cussing fit.
30. Throw wrench.
31. Cuss for additional 10 minutes because the wrench hits the Miss December(1992) poster on the wall.
32. Clean up; apply Band-Aid to knuckle.
33. Beer.
34. Beer.
35. Dump in additional 4 quarts of oil.
36. Beer.
37. Lower car from jack stands.
38. Accidentally crush one of the jack stands.
39. Move car back to apply more oil lift (AKA kitty litter) to fresh oil spilled during step 23.
40. Drive car.
------------------------
PS -
Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at July 17, 2008 12:04 AM
I tell yar something...if any male around 50 ..give or take some virile hunting years... has been genuinely thinking of meeting a woman in his age group.. would probably think twice after reading these blogs on a continuous basis.....what a bad wrap some of you are giving..particularly from a physical and phsiological aspect.. about many attractive middle aged women... maybe that's why so many women here are having little success in meeting a suitable partner..you've sent them running ...and puffing into the naive arms of younger women..shame..shame..shame..it really isn't beautiful...
I tell yar..even I'm beginning to think about how fugly we supposedly are.. sheesh!! talk about a conspiracy....hehe..
Posted by: naturalwoman08 at July 16, 2008 11:54 PM
waterbombe at 6:31 PM: That's a really good point. Ta.
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 16, 2008 11:50 PM
Waterbombe.
you being courteous sounds like an oxymoron. I called you as a male basher and you are to any man that disputes you. If you cannot take critisim then you have no right to give it. My comments were directed to blueyedblond, as usual you have to come in swinging with your opinion.
Blueyedblond you still have not answered the questions I asked of you.
OG
Posted by: oldergent at July 16, 2008 11:49 PM
hey I think I saw this topic a week ago... or was it a fortnight... or....?
All this stuff about men's biological 'need' for a partner of reproductive age... just doesn't gel. Humans have sex mainly for fun, not to make babies; sex has a social basis as well as a biological one; and lasting relationships are (eventually) about more than the sex.... which might explain some of the persistent singletude of a few 'persons' (oh I daren't name a gender) on this site.
Posted by: playfulhelen at July 16, 2008 11:48 PM
eatsrootsandleaves at 5:45 PM: Thank you very much for your understanding of us all, and personally, for your support of my attitude to blogposting.
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 16, 2008 11:46 PM
thelynath? at July 16, 2008 10:51 PM
Chris. Righto, righto. I am popular with the censor/Mrs Bobbitt tonight and some of my closely reasoned qualifications have not made it to print and others have been mangled to nonsense.
Get off the idea of babymaking.
I haven't said that these men want to reproduce in their 50's. Very few will want to probably. It is hard enough caring for the woman. It doesn't detract from the reasons I gave as to why there is this desire. Please see my post at 9:59.
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 16, 2008 11:45 PM
AAH, theorist or practitioner? I suspect certain males are just into the theory. I have some very good male friends who know I am fair, so no male bashing accusations.
Posted by: aquamanda56 at July 16, 2008 11:45 PM
Nearly forgot...what does ROFLMAO mean.
I've got a few of them figured out but this one beats me, I'm sure it's very simple.
Would anyone be interested enough to post a list of abbreviations.
Posted by: maestrac at July 16, 2008 11:39 PM
Blueyedblonde, I missed the window of opportunity to view your photo, what a shame, I like to put a face to the blogs.
Oldergent @ 9.41 pm..."So ok you did not need the HRT, seems to me you think a man should be ashamed to need a similar help that a lot of women had hormonoly that is."
Let's just clarify this, HRT is hormone REPLACEMENT therapy, replacing oestrogen and progesterone that was once in abundance in the female body. Sadly during and after menopause our bodies no longer produce these hormones and for many women this is an horrific time enduring night sweats, hot flushes, mood swings, and even palpitations and heart disease. HRT is used primarily to ease or prevent these symptoms, NOT to help with orgasms and sexuality. Viagra is not a hormone replacement, it is mainly used these days for erectile dysfunction, so where is the similarity?
Posted by: maestrac at July 16, 2008 11:30 PM
So ,Marcurterritory, I feel very sad that the only 'sweet nothings' you have had whispered in yourear (apart from the hissing of the lizards) are the words
"Are we there yet?"
Posted by: thelynathdiary at July 16, 2008 11:12 PM
OG, "G" is well, spoke with her on Saturday and she is busy ATM...
Marcus, not sure what you meant about hiding your pictures, so will politely say...What the??
And as to your second paragraph to me, l have to say that l give up! (Nah, l don't)
Truly you are a frustrating devil, please, please, can we have a discussion that is just about stuff ?? As in not braindraining?? Tis far too late in the evening.....
I think l need a bex pet!!.............K
Posted by: auntykaz at July 16, 2008 11:08 PM
Male Bashing? Give us a break, OG. The only people who bang on about male bashing are you, Marcus and TW. The other men have intelligent, courteous conversations with each other and the women on here.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 16, 2008 10:56 PM
Yo! MarcyMarc,
I do believe you when you say some men might want children for ego boosting purposed or perhaps to placate the gimme gimme gimme of the id?
I agree with your theory for two reasons
1. A midlife crisis guy would be selfish enough to only think of himself and not the consequences for the child.
2.Quite a few men of the vintage wouldn't have a clue about what is really involved in caring for a baby and toddler....having avoided it the first family/wife around
How expectations will be different for them with a much younger woman raised with different ideas on sharing reponsibilities.
Posted by: thelynathdiary at July 16, 2008 10:51 PM
Posted by: jenniferhi at July 16, 2008 9:14 PM
Looks like Marcus's piece just got cut.
Oh, I like the way I wrote that! lol.
Jen
Haha. It hurts when your piece is cut. Would be helpful for this discussion if you revealed your picture. Appearances count for a lot when playing the dating game.
If a man in his 50's virility is waning then a woman of similar age is probably about 15 years past her sensible reproductive age. The bloke, partner permitting, probably still has another 10 years in him. Unfortunately a man's sexual performance is easy for a woman to fault if there is a percieved problem with erection (and some women cannot even feel ejaculation). Women are not so easy to judge. From a man's point of view lifeless, uncommunicative, prudish or ugly bodied females are unlikely to elicit a man's best or even better, sexual performance. There needs to be a higher standard than 'capable of intercourse' for a woman's sexual attractiveness in a relationship.
Re NRL. They throw the ball backwards for the same reason men want often want a younger woman.
Men wanting a younger woman is not a crock of anything; it makes perfect sense when you consider respective needs and biology.
Cheers Marc
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 16, 2008 10:32 PM
geeeezzz usss.......I reckon there should be a blog .. Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus...or Women are a Farce and Men a waste of Penis?????..
sorry..best I could do on spur of the moment... : - :} )
and get your frustrations out on their....nw..x
Posted by: naturalwoman08 at July 16, 2008 10:28 PM
Kaz is there any word from "G", just wondering.
OG
Posted by: oldergent at July 16, 2008 10:06 PM
auntykaz at July 16, 2008 8:34 PM
Record is not stuck Kaz. I'm just reply to the inferred bloke bashing from blueyedblind that usually passes under the radar. Read my comment. Nothing I said rules out a fantastic, accomplished energetic older female. My point was if a bloke can't crack a decent fat he can easily be judged a dud; it is much harder to define (though easy enough to find ) when a woman is so hopelessly inadequate so as to qualify as an impotent female/orgasm faker. Incidentally there is a reliable way a man can tell if a woman has really orgasmed if anyone is interested. Physiologically organising an erection is much more demanding than what a woman has to do to accomodate one.
Why are you hiding your pictures did you say? You look like most of us here; garden variety RSVPer. Respective need or want is to have a new partner of reproductive age if it can be arranged. Not to have babies with necessarily but to positivley signal to others to validate and to gratify masculine need and ego. And remeber men like to try to organise in vertical heirarchies so for some the younger their lover the higher they might feel their status. Also the younger someone is the better nick they are likely to be in.
I dont think you are finished at any particular age; perhaps you are picky with your choices? How do we know that you don't have the bar extremely high yourself?
Young Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 16, 2008 9:59 PM
Perhaps, Auntykaz, Marcus means we are like a starfish eating.
Posted by: oohlala1 at July 16, 2008 9:57 PM
jenniferhi at July 16, 2008 9:05 PM What a doozie jenn.... wish I had thought of that. Still ROFLMAO
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 9:43 PM
Blueyedblond.
I have read your posts,otherwise I would not have responded. I have also just viewed you pic/profile.
Firstly, you have not answered the questions put to you, they are I feel legitimate and give you the right of reply, you are ducking behind indignation that someone had the hide to challenge you.
As to your prefered partners age it is heavily loaded to the younger side than the older, not much different to what men require A couple is less than a few, to be correct and not put spin on it. So ok you did not need HRT, seems to me you think a man should be ashamed to need a similar help that a lot of women had, hormonaly that is. Also if you have had men "Bang away till ejuclation" then there is something amiss with you or you choice of men. Again this has nothing to do with reproduction, just life at a mature age and the respect that should be there if you want it given back.
As to the bemoaning, that is the way you have come over to me, I do not speak for others.
Tallerthantom, so true,but that is not double standards, hmm.
WB, this is coming from a person who has sat back and read the continual male bashing of people like you and your ilk. You think you have licence and resent it when someone resents it and responds in the same vein as you like to do.
This post does not refer to the rest of you ladies that do not see it as addressed to you.
OG
Posted by: oldergent at July 16, 2008 9:41 PM
Looks like Marcus's piece just got cut.
Oh, I like the way I wrote that! lol.
Jen
Posted by: jenniferhi at July 16, 2008 9:14 PM
Blueyedblond was just agreeing with my observations/wonderings so don't give her such a hard time. and Marcus even though you seem to think 50 something men want to continue their urge to reproduce, the majority of profiles I have seen (pls note"I have seen') of this age group do not support your theory. There have only been a small minority that wanted more children of their own. I think you hit the nail on the head more though regarding the ego boost. My own rule of thumb as far as age of a partner goes is 5yrs younger or 5 years old (wouldn't ridgedly stick to that if I met someone outside those ages) as I think that is a realistic view for compatibility. And I assure you that although I am past my reproductive capabilities I'm not dead and now have the freedom to enjoy an intimate relationship much more than when I was younger and was at risk of falling pregnant.
Posted by: aquamanda56 at July 16, 2008 9:14 PM
I guess this is how you dispose of differing points of view...
Troyboy you directed your response directly at me when you quoted my description of myself almost word for word, thus giving me the right to have an opinion of your appearance. If the right of reply is a personal attack on a persons appearance then don't set yourself up for retaliation. I didn't say I had viewed the whole RSVP data base or even intimate that, nor did I say that men are so much worse than women. Is that your opinion?
How do I have no idea? What do I have no idea on?
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 9:14 PM
Geez Marcus - You'd want to be good in bed! Thats all I can say. Jen
Posted by: jenniferhi at July 16, 2008 9:05 PM
I have revealed my picture for a while... I am happy to participate in discussions here but will not resort to insult, innuendo and sarcasm.
I haven't critisised anyone in particular nor will I... I haven't even met any of you so please show me the same courtesy.
At least while you are picking on me you are leaving someone else alone.
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 8:45 PM
Ah yes I remember you now. Why does it make perfect sense? What respective needs should I consider? Are you saying that once a woman is past reproductive age then she is not wanting of a virile man? So if I had a hysterectomy at 35 then my days were over. If i go through menopause at 50 I am finished but a man at 50 still has another 10 years in him? I think I may have been married to you and I would leave you for the same sexist and borish bevaviour I left him.
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 8:35 PM
Grego, after lengthy deliberation and much consideration l mark your assessment as competent...........
Knowing WB reasonably well, l judged on her personality traits as l find them and her physical traits as l see them. Of course, there are some things that l have no knowledge of so scored those as not yet competent........on my behalf, not yours.....
I have to say WB that based on that exhaustive analysis, Greg has done very well indeed, and thus is very switched on in the intuitive game.......
WB, you may belt me from here til Tuesday for saying that, so Greg, a complimentary glass of bubbles to WB will help her see things my way, l am hoping.....
OOhhhh. me brain hurts, its been a while since l have had to assess anyone's project......
Marcus, tut tut, that record is stuck again.........just because a woman is past her reproductive age, it doesn't mean that she can't enjoy sex.........Rather the opposite l would think in many cases.....lying there like a starfish indeed.
And from a woman's point of view, it
would be nice is some men actually know how to use their equipment.
One would think that if a man is in his fifties, he would be well skilled as opposed to being slightly more accomplished than a teenager............................K
Posted by: auntykaz at July 16, 2008 8:34 PM
OG, you have got it wrong on all counts. If you read my post you would see that I would prefer to have a partner near my own age, a couple of years younger or a few years older. I am bemoaning nothing and you have presumed things, none of which are true. Did I have an hormonal imbalance.. do u mean the contraceptive pill. Hardly a comparison.
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 8:26 PM
I posted a reply to you Timewarp but it got censored...I'll have to try again tomorrow.
Greg, Auntykaz will be here at some stage with a bottle of bubbly I reckon. I'll leave it to her and her sense of humour.
What bitterness from you towards blueeyedblond, OG, where is that coming from? Stick to the facts instead of insults...gosh this gets so tiresome.
LOVE the giraffe/camel, ooh la la ...it wouldn't talk back either, would it? Ha ha.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 16, 2008 8:00 PM
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 6:26 PM
So again with you it comes down to personal attack and rating people on appearance. Tarzan I 'ain't, oh dear, I'm so hurt but you see the difference between us is I am not using looks as the basis of my judgements, hence I don't care what you look like. So glad you have been able, in so short a time, to examine the entire rsvp database and determine that men are so much worse than women. You have no idea, only bitterness over lost opportunity. Good luck in the future however babe I hope, as OG suggests, you find your young thing and that he is all you desire.
Troy
Posted by: troyohboy at July 16, 2008 7:50 PM
grego7 at July 16, 2008 11:03 AM
Are you WB's Adonis or just being ol' Horus?
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 16, 2008 7:42 PM
Blueyedblond.
So you get your dream machine, 2years down the track he takes ill and needs bed care for the rest of his life, rsvp.
Or.
You wake up to the realities of life and fall for an older man, he may need a chemical much the same as you used to use to control the hormone imbalance, you have 10 idylic years, Then he falls off his perch, What would your preference be?
Seems to me that you are bemoaning the fact that you have passed the age when you can attract the younger man. or is it that you regret the fact that you could not sustain a lasting relationship with one of them to this date.
OG
Posted by: oldergent at July 16, 2008 7:19 PM
TW's dream woman sounds to me like a giraffe or maybe a camel. The giraffe has the right bottom but the camel has the come hither eyes:))
Posted by: oohlala1 at July 16, 2008 7:17 PM
Too true ERAL... if we were all the same or looking for the same thing what a boring world this would be.
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 6:38 PM
Possibly the older women who are undecided about children are thinking of step-parenting rather than parenting? They probably wouldn't be thinking of having a kid, but they might be thinking of mothering one...and not want to put off a guy who has kids.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 16, 2008 6:31 PM
Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit troyboy. You have never seem me so do not comment on my appearance.(may I add Tarzan you aint). and I am not precious. Why should I sit back and listen to the dribble a couple of men on here spit out without making a comment. There are NOT as many men "looking for a woman their age who understands the above as women".
I have noticed the difference in writing styles between some men and some women (notice how I don't say all or everyone) on the blogs.
eral.. I apologise to you if you did not make that statement.It was quite a while ago and the discussion went the same way as this one, resorting to sarcasm and derogatory remarks instead of sticking to the facts.
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 6:26 PM
To the comments recently made towards TW -
I'de like to suggest we ALL remember that "it takes all sorts to make the world go round".
TW's preferences are his personal business, and that there are as many here, who would agree with him as disagree!
Those that would ridicule him for his tasteful openness have well have much more to learn about their own undesirable agendas, than he does.
One woman prefers a "man's man", another would call him a "chauvinist pig".
WHO IS RIGHT?
The huge variety of cultures, people,languages, and generational gaps on this planet; each of us with our own esoteric interests and preferences, would be the incurable cause for our great confusion and angst. Not a simple gender difference !
I gather the disagreements expressed here are a rather good example of the frustration peole are feeling, whilst trying so desperately to share, what they believe is their most precious possestions - theirsouls, with at least just one other person - before they die!
Trying to be all things to all people is a hopeless ideal - feminist or otherwise.
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at July 16, 2008 5:45 PM
Are you sure of your facts tallerthantom. Women, like men, have younger and older age limits. Women tend to go about 5 - 8 years younger and up to 8 years older.Men tend to go 5 - 15 years younger and rarely go over their own age for an upper limit. You need to apply the same comparison criteria for men and women if you want to do comparisons.
Boytroy and Marcus.. just did quick browse of women around 50 and a very small minority said they were undecided about having children, most said they didn't want any more of their own. Angst is it? I didn't see much angst in the profiles. Trophy partner, recapture lost youth? Maybe, just the same as men.. Sexual.. YOU BET. Against nature is it..no it is against society.
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 5:17 PM
Gee, what is it with you precious women? Poor me, men want younger women and I'm in my prime, I have so much to offer, bloody men not seeing the person that I am underneath the fat and wrinkles. You may be only 2 kg heavier when married but the fat and muscle is distributed much differently I can tell you.
And you know what?.. there are as many men looking for a woman their age who understands the above as women. Get over yourself ladies, mix in other circles and stop blaming others for your lack of success.
I've never gone out with a younger woman in life and I've gone alright!
Troy
Posted by: troyohboy at July 16, 2008 5:13 PM
I'm with Aquamanda and blueyedblond .. there definitely is an age disparity on RSVP. I'm amazed and amused to find that the men looking at my profile and sending kisses are mostly late 30s early 40s. I suppose I should be flattered but really I would be happier getting interest from guys in their late 50s and 60s but it doesnt happen. If I send guys in this age group a kiss I'm mostly ignored or recieve a negative response. Ive now made my photos, 'password protected' in the hope that someone might be interested in me from what I write in my profile rather than just cruising thru and looking at my photo and commenting that I have "Nice Legs!" That was TW's only response to my profile if I recall correctly and he's not alone in that.
Nothing wrong with your profile aquamanda, nice natural photos and not too many words for the impatient types to wade through. Like many of we "Mature" ladies I'm sure you have a lot to offer for any man who is discerning enough to recognize quality when he sees it.
Posted by: waternymph47 at July 16, 2008 5:12 PM
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 2:54 PM
Blue - I don't recall I've ever commented upon one of your previous posts, nor is it something i would say to a woman.
Simple case of mistaken identity ...
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at July 16, 2008 5:12 PM
Blueyedblond at 2.54pm.....I very much like what you posted....
Cheers,
B.
Posted by: bm1960 at July 16, 2008 5:00 PM
Why would anyone in their right mind want chldren at that sort of age, 50's and 60's??
Seriously guys, all thoughts of recapturing lost / misspent youth aside, WHY???
Is it to have someone to look after them in old age??
That's about all l can think of.....
l really struggle with this one.............K
Posted by: auntykaz at July 16, 2008 4:42 PM
Blueeyed blonde: good on you for your post. I have an friend who left her abusive husband for her young tennis coach. They have been married for 15 years now.
PlayfulHelen: I have lived in Adelaide (grew up there and studied there) Darwin (went for a 10 week fishing trip and left 11 years later) and now Mildura. Maybe Ive got a common face :)
Im glad someone understood my post - I wanted to retract it immediately! Its so easy to be misunderstood here.
Posted by: willow29 at July 16, 2008 4:29 PM
ohboyohtroy
I can't explain it either but do find that most female profiles I look at are looking for much younger men.I'd be more than happy with a 45-50 yr old woman but most of them are looking for 35 yr old guys ....go figure
Posted by: tallerthantom at July 16, 2008 4:12 PM
hey Willow! thanks, I like your profile too, and spunky photos! you look a little familiar - were you ever a Melbourne gal? I've really enjoyed your tales of country life, especially that casual kindness of sharing bags of veges over the fence.
Know what you mean about forming wrong impressions (or rather, filling the gaps with fantasy) about people you meet on-line. I've met a few doozies through rsvp (including one who was married and lied about it)! It just means, for me, that if I was strongly attracted to someone and it felt mutual, I'd meet them sooner than later.
Posted by: playfulhelen at July 16, 2008 3:59 PM
aquamanda56 at July 16, 2008 1:38 AM
I have to weigh in here and this topic is one discussed many times by me and my single female friends.
I will give you my opinion and stand tall to be shot down in flames by male bloggers, bearing in mind I am not referring to all men, just the ones I have met, and it is quite a few in the 11 years I have been single...
Men over 50 have left women their own age and have found this new freedom, of course they will be attracted to something different from what they have had for years. I think that is human nature. They may be capable siring offspring, and are attracted to nubile bodies but the bottom line is their virility is waning and ability to maintain or even get an erection is diminishing. Yes I know Viagra is easily obtained but if you were to ask women ( yes we do talk about your performances guys) they do not particularly enjoy sex with a guy who has an erection for a long time and has to bang away until he ejaculates. So what happens with an older man who wins a younger bride? He finds he is pushing a pram at 50+ or is responsible for the young children of a new partner. First he looks stupid pushing the pram and being told how cute his grandchildren are and second why would you want to be saddled with young children when you have the means and time to be travelling and generally being responsibility free. You have already given at least half of what you had before away why do it again.
I am 58 and don't have a problem with my age and would really like a partner around my own age but I am past my use by date in the calendars of most men. I am only a couple of kilos heavier than when I got married, have very few wrinkles and still extremely fit and active... however ... I am seen as too old. I, and many other women my age feel, and look sexier than we did in our 30’s and 40’s. We are free of reproduction issues and our kids have usually left the nest, leaving us to be liberated in many ways. Women my age are left wondering what is wrong with us and why we are being rejected, when in fact there is nothing wrong with us at all, we are amazing women… society has this attitude that men should be older than their women, what a load of crock s*#t. Reproductively women may age quicker than men but chronologically women are 10 to 15 years younger than men.
I have had quite a few relationships (not 1 night stands) with younger men, never at my instigation, they have pursued me. They cannot understand why men my age don’t find me sexy and desirable… I say neither do I?
Marcus you say why not? It is a good ego boost too and may prove practical. If you saw me with my younger partner would you say the same thing? NO… you would say, as I have been told before by I think ERAL, I am dreaming and he is using me and will toss me aside when he is done. Nothing is further from the truth. He would say so too.
Playfulhelen, you are a lot younger than me but I am also not interested in being with a man 10+ years older than me, I don’t want to spend the best years of my life visiting my partner in a nursing home.
Disclaimer… this is a personal opinion and not the opinion of all women.. no men were sacraficed for this blog.
Posted by: blueyedblond at July 16, 2008 2:54 PM
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 16, 2008 12:09 PM
Marcus, significant numbers of 50 plus women on rsvp are undecided about children so would consider themselves in the child bearing age bracket. This may explain their angst in relation to many men wanting younger women when they clearly fit the demographic?
I can't explain the many women looking for younger men, perhaps it is sexual, a need for the trophy partner, an attempt to re-capture lost youth. However, I would agree, it is against nature. haha.
Troy
Posted by: troyohboy at July 16, 2008 2:22 PM
aquamanda56 at July 16, 2008 1:38 AM
On seeming age disparity.
Older men generally would like a woman who is still theoretically of reproductive age.
Men have much longer reproductive lives than women- about twice as long. Plenty of men become. or are capable of becoming fathers in their 50's and even 60's. There is some good hardwired stuff driving their selection. Of course it may not make a lot of sense in other ways, but why not? It is a good ego boost too and may prove practical.
Cheers Marcus.
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 16, 2008 12:09 PM
Longjog@9.20 Australia's own illustrated lady ,now deceased.Wildish gal...artisan.
Posted by: ssshhh at July 16, 2008 12:06 PM
Playful Helen: First of all I liked your profile, it looks fun and fresh. Secondly, I agree with you about the puzzlement of the profiles and the blogs and how do you "see" the real people. For the blogs it doesnt really matter, although you can form some attachments that you may not consider looking at the profiles.
Speaking of attachments, isnt it strange that you can develop a little crush on someone without knowing them or really without encouragement? Or is that just me?
Once you know you're going in the wrong direction, its a bit of a blow, but you do end up stumbling onto the right path and hope that it all went unnoticed. (A bit like Billy Connelly tripping on the travelator, if anyone has seen that).
Posted by: willow29 at July 16, 2008 11:48 AM
Greg, l will marking exams / essays/ assessments tonight with a drop of red or two to infuse me with warm vibes.......
Have briefly skimmed over yours and for starters give you a plus for punctuality......K
Posted by: auntykaz at July 16, 2008 11:37 AM
Even if you didnt pass, Grego, it was a very good go!
Posted by: willow29 at July 16, 2008 11:24 AM
Hey grego, now can you do one of aliane.....that would be interesting hahahaha
Troy
Posted by: troyohboy at July 16, 2008 11:23 AM
Waterbombe, herewith my assessment of personality and characteristics derived from my interpretation of your blogs. Some weeks ago you revealed your profile and I read it but have completely forgotten the details. There was a picture as well and I vaguely recall your face, however, I have tried to just use your blogging in my thinking.
You have well above average intelligence and are well educated with tertiary qualifications. You were probably educated at a private school where your natural leadership skills showed. You may have been a prefect or team leader. However, the school was very traditional in its thinking about the roles and jobs to which girls should aspire. This annoyed you. You did well at sport.
I believe you trained as a lawyer or have had experience in the law. When I first came on the blogs in May I was fairly sure you were a lawyer. You may, however, be in education and if you are I suspect you are a school principal or vice-principal. Your career has involved leadership and/or positions where you could to influence others. You could have had some involvement with women’s issues but not at the very hard end eg female abuse etc.
You are a private person and in a crowd of strangers you don’t say much until you have assessed each individual. This is something that you like doing ie working out what makes a person tick. Amongst friends and family you are far more spontaneous and at times even boisterous. You do have a strong ego and sense of self which at times can lead to arrogance and a touch of pride. You are aware of this failing and keep it in check when required.
As a young woman you could compete with your male peers but that was not welcomed so you had to hold yourself back. You were very attractive without being a knock out but a lot of boys/young men who tried to date you, you found boring and intellectually inferior. You are, however, a very sensual and sexy creature for the right man.
Your first marriage was a traditional type of union but failed as you became more assertive and your husband could not adjust. Your current partner recognizes equality in the partnership and is confident enough in himself that he does not have to be “the man”. You, when appropriate, do defer to his male judgment and enjoy being his “girl”. You are assertive without being aggressive but will “bite” if challenged by someone you consider an idiot. I don’t think you are a control freak but some people may think you are.
Physically, you have looked after yourself well partly because of your sports interest but also because you have strong determination. I originally thought that you were a blonde (ie natural blonde) but in you photo you were not blonde. You are between 5’4” and 5’7’’ but could be as tall as 5”9” although I doubt it. You are good looking perhaps quite handsome although your intellect would make you very attractive to some men and completely turn off others.
I am more confidant in the personality part of the assesment than the physical. That is because I find many women attractive and so dont have a fixed view of what my physically ideal woman is which can project into a profile. As I have said befoe I prefer profiles without pictures.
Hope that I pass. Kaz, there is a bottle of bubbly in it if you give me a credit. rgds greg
Posted by: grego7 at July 16, 2008 11:03 AM
aquamanda@1.38 (were you really up that late, or was there a long lag for your comment to load? I'm also bemused with how this system works!) Re: age disparities in dating, I share your dismay. There's been quite a lot of research to support the idea that men do start 'cherry-picking' younger women once they (the men) hit their 40s... and because of the shortage of men, it works for them. Doesn't really work for me to have a much older partner - the prospect of a few good years followed by nursing him through his elderly infirmity, then being widowed and alone for several decades. Hmph. Don't get me wrong, I do love men. And a lot depends on the individual partner - some men are old at 50, some are hearty and lively at 65. You (and possibly me) may have more luck meeting your next feller socially than on RSVP - RSVP encourages people to fantasise about an ideal, and not settle for less, because there'll always be a new crop of RSVPers next week. I'm on here at least as much for the social contact and blogging - have enjoyed reading the blogs the last few weeks.
(Hi everyone! I have strong impressions of who lots of you are, but of course you don't know me... bloglife is odd.)
Posted by: playfulhelen at July 16, 2008 10:18 AM
Iaiperth @Troywhataboy......I was doing my usual tongue in cheek comment..wasn't seriously expecting verbal attacks....just ruffled feathers.(smile)
TW @11.54.Thank you kindly for your endorsement,but you got my gender confused..........BIGGLES I'm not;AmeliaE,maybe!
Best of british for Saturday.......
Like you,I'm ENJOYING life,but wont kiss & tell! Ciao.....AmeliaE
Posted by: kurli at July 16, 2008 9:52 AM
sssh...and who is Valli Myer ?
Posted by: jogalonga at July 16, 2008 9:20 AM
I can;t understand what that comment about Kurli bashing is either. I don;t think anyone has bashed Kurli. I believe TW was extremely disrespectful but she chose to see him, no one else has engaged in any. I asked a simple question as I think that respect should be earned and not a given and I was accused of Kurli bashing. At my age I think I can ask that question and it was an honest question and I am very proud that I can mix with younger people and have their respect and I theirs. However, it turned into a load of abuse, unbelievable, a couple of extremely aggressive women who leap around like mad brikkies slinging dirt on this site and some really great good fun lightheated ones as well....oh well, that's life I suppose. It's freezing in Perth, blowing a gale and raining. I think that's the hard thing here, rain cold and wind all happens at once and it's also dark....roll on summer...please.
Posted by: iaminperth at July 16, 2008 9:10 AM
Posted by: kurli at July 15, 2008 10:56 PM and I guess that once again I'm leaving myself open to kurli bashing here,VBG)
Why do you preface every post with this old girl? I suspect it is an attempt to deflect comment from your geriatric/femmo slant ipso facto, if you disagree it's just kurli bashing. Or is it just insecurity.....seems like it, but what ever it is you should get over it.
Oh no! I guess I have once again left myself open to some troy bashing...ho hum.
Troy
Posted by: troyohboy at July 16, 2008 8:55 AM
Still having trouble following this.... if comments showed up sooner perhaps it would be a bit more flowing...anyway..... on the suggestion that many women are not worth talking to.....I would counter that many men , instead of being prepared to just listen and contribute a few ideas to a topic of conversation think they have to provide answers or solutions. resulting in a lot of "you should..." type conversations. We don't want you to have the answer...we just want a discussion so that we can come up with our own conclusion...guys, get with the program. Having said that i mostly enjoy male and female company at different times for different reasons...pretty normal really. But answer me this, why is it so many 50 something men think 36 -46 women are their match? When I was 36, I certainly wasn't going to be interested in a 50 something guy. Now that I'm 52, the men that look at my profile are 60 something, sorry, I think someone closer to my age would be more desirable. I am becoming disillusioned with RSVP as a dating medium or is my profile just crap?
Posted by: aquamanda56 at July 16, 2008 1:38 AM
Biggles at 10:56pm: Hi doll!
Hey, I'm in my 70s, and believe me, lots HAS happened. That I won't be admitting to here. And certainly not to you.
My 6.27pm post reminded youall that the fantasies of perfection that we have about our perfect partner are just that, and in real life we expect to settle for much less.
But when you do meet someone who is exactly what you had fantasised, as I did when I met you, it's very reassuring,
You now know that your dreams are real, and you only have to land the next total dreamboat that you come across.
Maybe as soon as lunchtime next Saturday . She put me through a written humour exam, to see if I was funny enough to qualify for a date with her. Some gal.
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 15, 2008 11:54 PM
Longjog @10.22..she's actually Valli Myer's daughter........
Posted by: ssshhh at July 15, 2008 11:01 PM
waternymph @12.43pm I think(and I guess that once again I'm leaving myself open to kurli bashing here,VBG) but TW has expectations for mrs rite- enuff beyond belief.
As for the comment re"women are not worth talking with" what a load of cods wallop!!
We all tend to look for our heart's desire through rose coloured glasses.......but hey...if you're in your 70's and NOTHING has happened,maybe you need to re-think your wish list.
I used to say that I preferred conversing/discussing with the male species.........now I'm convinced that women are far more adaptable
Posted by: kurli at July 15, 2008 10:56 PM
iaminperth at 10:03pm: No Perth, it's not caused by being threatened, it's the pulses that cause the pulsing. Especially the baked beans - unparalleled rocket fuel.
I blame my age.
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 15, 2008 10:51 PM
I had an email tonight and was told that 50% of the men on here are married.
Naaahhh, I said more like 60%, i then suggested that every second date she had must have been with a married man and that is how she got those figures.
She then said well, how come you reckon 10% of the women on here are mental ?
i said 'well after the sixty percent who are married that only leaves 40% and i would say i have only been out with around 10%.
Posted by: jogalonga at July 15, 2008 10:29 PM
Conversation pieces, i have thought long and hard about this.
I could be going out with a woman next week hwhen she flys back in from Honkers.
I thought to start the conversation I would ask her about her strategically placed tattoo and belly ring.
i want to know why she did it ,where it is , and can i see it and maybe touch it.
Do you think I will get an answer or do you think I might be too forward in asking ?
just my opinion but when a 50 year old who looks and behaves like a 20 year old and has a tattoo and a belly ring it just makes me wonder what she may have done in another life.
Posted by: jogalonga at July 15, 2008 10:22 PM
Oh dear Marcus, I think TW does that quite a few times as well when threatened.
Posted by: iaminperth at July 15, 2008 10:03 PM
Marcus, not noice, not noice at all....
But l am sure that WB will answer that one in her own style.....
Is that the peice l am supposed to judge ??
If so l will have to wait until Greg gives us his take tomorrow and compare, however l get the feeling that it will not be nearly as ummmm descriptive of yours.....
Sounds a bit love / hate - y to me...........K
Posted by: auntykaz at July 15, 2008 9:19 PM
"The SMS phraseology is a new medium again. I have noticed some people writing their profiles in SMS which is a turn off for me. SMS phraseology does not work in email."
Waterbombe, I can't agree with you more. Even in a business situation, when I get "whr u off 2?" emails from a director at work, he slips a little lower on my credibility rating.
And even though it's acceptable to write like that during texts... I geneally don't. Maybe it's dumbing down the language, but the shock was when my daughter composed a paper for school and there was text language in it.
(Then I played evil parent and made her rewrite it!)
Posted by: aussieinindiana at July 15, 2008 9:01 PM
OK Kaz.
I have never seen her profile and the only indication of her appearance was given 2nd hand by TW who admitted being under the weather.
I will have to relate to the old quip of 'what is the difference between a feminist and a walrus?' About 7 pounds.
There is a little critter called a Bombardier beetle, quite common in Australia that when threatened releases two strong chemicals into a chamber in its backside. These react violently, reach about 100c and are expelled with a noise and explosive force as a smelly hot vapour in the general direction of the threat. This action can be repeated several times a minute.....
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 15, 2008 8:52 PM
Maybe she tripped and fell Marcus, and you were a sufficient landing strip :-)............K
Posted by: auntykaz at July 15, 2008 8:41 PM
waterbombe July 15, 2008 3:30 PM
I can understand people wanting to thump you so I am not suprised you have learnt self defence/offense. Imagine the hoo har if I bragged here about jobbing the
plump hoyden who launched herself into my lap at the club the other night.
I have sufficient picture of you thanks. Even bribed I am not about to have a waterbeetle fantasy. If anyone else is interested have a google at 'you tube relax banned version'. WB is the woman behind the bar. TW also makes an appearance from on high. Haha
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 15, 2008 7:34 PM
Marcus, you disappoint us, having withdrawn from the ring. Go on with you, you would just love a waterbeetle fantasy...
And, ah, Marcus, that guy didn't drop himself in my lap as the lady did to you. No, he was a total stranger who flipped out, grabbed the nearest woman, who happened to be me, threw me down on the floor chest first, which hurt enormously I might add, twisted my arm up my back and began shouting derogatory comments about women as he twisted my arm further. Quite frightening stuff when it happens to you. Of course you will say it was his testosterone talking, and what can I expect, being me, but i will repeat (because I know you are a little hard of hearing ) that he was a total stranger. See once again you have done it....taken a woman's argument out of context and then diminished it. Comparing my experience of assault to a woman sitting herself in your lap is just plain deceptive ...and anyway, what do you expect if you go to a strip joint? You poor thing, stay home and have a waterbeetle fantasy, it is much safer.
You choose the same strategy for argument so frequently that I am really beinning to wonder what your comprehension skills are like. I'll bet they are gendered, though.......you listen to men more closely than you listen to women, don't you?
Posted by: waterbombe at July 15, 2008 7:15 PM
Marcus, that isn't very sporting of you.....
Go on.....you may be surprised you know......K
Posted by: auntykaz at July 15, 2008 7:12 PM
Grego, I forgot to say your dad and your girlfriend were pretty special, too. I will probably not be around in the morning ...have to chuff off to work fairly early...but I believe auntykaz will be...and we will leave it to her to adjudicate, anyways. See if you can read a physical appearance into my words (I always do that, and I always get it wrong) as well as a personality... apart from the standard femmo man hating pinko lefto whinging dominatrix stuff that is just SO obvious.No points for spotting that...Marcus is already onto it.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 15, 2008 7:00 PM
waternymph47 at 12:23pm: I've already replied to your question and others like it in the chocolate mud cake blog with some clarifications, posted about sunset.
I don't think people realise that I, like others, was telling youall what I like best, which is more than I expect to settle for: Ms Right-Enuff who thinks I'm Mr Right-Enuff. It's in my profile.
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 15, 2008 6:27 PM
Grego, you have a solid gold promise that I will not deck you. Of course the question to ask is is that a core promise or a non-core promise? Don't you love the spin doctors...they can make a sow's ear out of silk.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 15, 2008 6:19 PM
fromheretoeternaty at 10:45 AM: Thanks for the site. Had dug your previous post out of the closed previous blog this morning, and will look at it when I get back from tonight's seminar.
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 15, 2008 6:16 PM
waterbombe July 15, 2008 3:30 PM
I can understand somebody wanting to thump you so I am not suprised you have learnt self defence/offense. Imagine the hoo har if I bragged here about jobbing the fat tart who launched herself into my lap at the club the other night.
I have sufficient picture of you thanks. Even bribed I am not about to have a waterbeetle fantasy. If anyone else is interestedhave a google at 'you tube relax banned version'. WB is the woman behind the bar. TW also makes an appearance from on high. Haha
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 15, 2008 6:02 PM
Hmm, Waterbombe, if you are asking that l be an impartial judge then no amount of financial carrot will sway me......
However, if you are asking that l give a favorable comment your way, it will require a considerable sum to buy my positivity..............K
Posted by: auntykaz at July 15, 2008 5:57 PM
WB, I accept your challenge but I need a little time to think about it.
Your martial arts story reminded me of an incident with one of my first girlfriends,. She was the australian judo champion. At a pool party put on by my old man for his workmates one of the married men was coming onto her a bit too strongly. She was just 18. It was making her and his wife very uncomfortable. Anyway my old man had a quiet word to my gf and the next time the bloke made a grope at her she decked him hard.
He promptly returned to his wife's side suitably chastened by the laughter of all.
As I do not want to be decked myself I will be careful. My assessment will be posted tomorrow morning.
rgds grego
Posted by: grego7 at July 15, 2008 5:14 PM
Well thanks for the clarification, M, I did think it was my Adonis you were having a swipe at, so just goes to show how easily things are misinterpreted.
"If I ever get to meet some bloggers I will be fascinated by the actual vs my perception of them based on blogs/profile". Grego, I have a tough skin, look at all the crap I have to listen to from Marcus and TW etc and yet I still keep soldiering on, you can't keep a good feminist down of course...but I reckon you can't get an accurate picture of people from blogs and profile...well I should be honest, I can't. Let's see...would you be interested to have a crack at a description of me from blogs/profile (it was up a while ago), and I will request Auntykaz to tell you how accurate you are (of course I will pay her well :-). She is a fair and decent judge and very funny to boot...it could be quite entertaining. Marcus just to keep me humble, you could have a crack at a description as well. In return I promise I will say nothing and indeed not even hit you if we meet.....and that promise is worth something ...a bloke (a stranger) did hit me a few years ago, actually he floored me, but my years of martial arts training whooshed back and I spun out of his ugly embrace and dropped him. He got such a shock...he probably won't assault another middle aged woman for a while. Once I got over the shock myself, it was quite entertaining, especially to see the reaction of all the blokes nearby. They were rooted to the spot. It was really funny. God I do get off topic, back to the point. Of course now I've told you that Grego you will be very, very careful with what you say......ha ha.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 15, 2008 3:30 PM
WB. That wasn't your 'Adonis' but the Adonis of myth I referred to as lacking brainpower.
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 15, 2008 2:08 PM
Waterbombe and Greg, agree there.....
I find that sometimes l write things and on rereading them my original intention may have been overlooked.
I find the most important thing is tonal, and those who have met me personally from here would agree that most things l say have a humorous slant that does not always come through......
Not that l find it a chore to be serious and can be at times, l just find myself leaning towards the other way...
Text talk is fine in an SMS, but an absolute no no in any other forum. I think it is much nicer to READ an email rather than try to translate it.......
Greg, l have found that the bloggers l have met have all been nice people, and am glad to have made the transition from pen pal to personal connection.....................K
Posted by: auntykaz at July 15, 2008 1:41 PM
I tend to agree with you Grego regarding letter writing. True letters are so special and the thoughts and feelings have flowed to the page. Like Willow mentioned the other day about reading some old love letters how special they are and the beauiful memories they evoke. Is not quite the same with an email print off is it?
With email, the specialness can still happen though. But I think probably mostly if the person can type, because then their thoughts can flow straight to the page. If they can't type, there is often frustration and a give up attitude.
I have found people I have connected with via this site and also private blogs I have been involved with and even a Fan based site of my favourite singer, that these people for the most part were exactly how I thought they would be. Your intuition comes into it as well I think.
I feel there are ones on this blog that you feel an instant connection of friendship with, yet others you wouldn't want to meet ever!
And I love that I have made some lovely connections just through blogging here.
I so agree with you over SMS speak on a profile. YUK! To me, the profile is so important, after all we are trying to put ourselves in the best light possible. It's not like there isn't enough room to fill in some details without abbreviations.
Jen
Posted by: jenniferhi at July 15, 2008 12:31 PM
Thanks very much to malsie, willow29 and auntykaz for the feedback on my profile. Very much appreciated - thanks :-)
Posted by: retrohetero at July 15, 2008 12:23 PM
waternymph47 at July 14, 2008 12:29 PM: "There's a big difference between 'many' (a significant proportion) and 'most' (well over half.)
I said 'many' and I cite the recent unusually-nasty blogs as evidence. Make up your own mind what you think"...(I always do),
"but when I wrote that, I was mainly thinking how badly musicteacher had been treated in this place."
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 15, 2008 12:24 AM
TW I always cut and paste when I respond so I'm usually accurate when I quote you and I can only react to what you write not being aware of the thought that was behind what you wrote.
I must ask tho TW . what exactly are you seeking .. if you are seeking a partner here? Just from memory(not cut & paste) I believe you said something about requiring a trim slim lady with all firm and no flabby bits! Did I get that right ?? Given that you are 72 .. is this a realistic hope? I'm in pretty good shape for 60 but nevertheless realistic about the ravages of time and gravity and doing my best to stay that way with attention to diet and excercise. Something you'd only be able to tell up close and personal of course! :-)
Posted by: waternymph47 at July 15, 2008 12:23 PM
Marcus, off to the principal's office you go young man, smack smack........
100 lines for you with the following.....
l must try to be more lighthearted......
Good grief, l left theoretical sex education behind in high school with our teacher Bunny Boots.................K
Posted by: auntykaz at July 15, 2008 12:09 PM
Posted by: waterbombe at July 15, 2008 11:12 AM Was that The Hungarian Uprising, fromheretoeternaty? What a terrible time. I'm very glad you got to safety
Yes, thats right and thank you .Well, it's just another day in history isn't it.
Sadly, history repeats all to often and stricks so many.
Posted by: fromheretoeternaty at July 15, 2008 11:57 AM
Posted by: amberlight58 at July 15, 2008 10:38 AM can hardly even remember ever feeling so worry-free. Even at the tender age of eight, I was well aware of the problems of adults and their world!
I hope it was different for my children, I really do. (But sadly on refelection, my ex and I had such a troubled marriage, it probably wasn't exactly like this for them either)
amberlight58 how very sad for you and I can certainly relate to what you are saying and I have lived it too.
Having said that, I can still relate and truely believe that this poem does speak to the child in each and every one of us.Maybe not all but the part that does is the part you hang onto.I always have and never questioned otherwise.What I experienced as a child , well, I didn't know any better. I followed the footsteps of my parents knowing and trusting that they had the answers as to why.It was what I did and not who I am.And, yes, my life was and still is just as it says in that poem, why ? Because, that is what I choose to focus on and add to.
As to your children,you know, we are so busy giving our children all the things we didn't have, that we forget to give them all the things we did have.The love of family,the knowledge that we have gathered from experience, be it good or bad. These are the things they will draw on and thank you for.
And you know, one day they will remind you of all this,as my son does, when he says " Mum,stop looking back, you will get a sore neck" Makes me laugh every time !
Posted by: fromheretoeternaty at July 15, 2008 11:51 AM
Beetles don't quack, Marcus.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 15, 2008 11:41 AM
Posted by: waterbombe at July 14, 2008 7:19 PM
WB, Your post is very thought provoking. I think, however, it is the medium ie email/electronic post which is the limitation.
In days past letter writing was almost an artform. Many people fell in love via letter and subsequently happily married.
When email first became available the phraseology of the letter did not seem to work. In business, email took over from telex which had its own short hand and telex phraseology did not transfer to email either.
The SMS phraseology is a new medium again. I have noticed some people writing their profiles in SMS which is a turn off for me. SMS phraseology does not work in email.
I agree with you that the personality does not seem to come through on a computer screen whereas it does to some degree in a letter especially a hand written one.
Agree also about blogs as it is too easy to "say" something which can be interpreted differently than the way it is meant. The abscence of body language is a key limitation. It is also easy to to be nasty on a blog than face to face. A blog is a cowards way of being aggressive.
However,it does seem to me that if a person cannot carry on an email conversation they may not be able to do anything face to face either. I was staggered by some blogger a while back saying they did not want to email much with a prospective date because then he would not have enough to say on the date. And he was hoping for a long term relationship.
If I ever get to meet some bloggers I will be fascinated by the actual vs my perception of them based on blogs/profile.
rgds grego
Posted by: grego7 at July 15, 2008 11:18 AM
Was that The Hungarian Uprising, fromheretoeternaty? What a terrible time. I'm very glad you got to safety.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 15, 2008 11:12 AM
Beetle, by consistenetly quacking about certain blokes perspective on their maleness not fitting in with the female centric idea of sexuality (in the broad sense) you are exposing your chauvinism.
To many men and woman have been conditioned by the nonsense and regard good male perspectives as aberrant.
What is inherently wrong with men objectifying a body, you were doing it earlier on arses. Breasts and buttocks have evolved precisely to be objective gender signalling devices, with some better than others.Lips mimick aroused labia and so on.
You have previously bragged about your Adonis/bf What cerebral attributes is he known for? FA. Haha.
Cheers Marquis
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 15, 2008 10:53 AM
timewarp1
Reposting this here for you as I feel that you may have missed my response in the Long Distance Relationship blog although I have posted it twice
You will find many references in relation to this piece on the net.The information I am posting here is in relation to the author of many such wonderful works. It is called "The Invitation" or Reclaiming the Heart
Posted by: timewarp1 at July 13, 2008 7:01 PM
So sorry to have missed your post.I have been away
Here is the information you requested and I am so glad that you liked it http://www.oriah.org/books.html# Please enjoy, as I have
Posted by: fromheretoeternaty at July 14, 2008 1:17 PM
Posted by: fromheretoeternaty at July 15, 2008 10:45 AM
OK recess is over. Well, I've marked your Our Negativity Towards Women In General essay and you get 10/10, Marcus and TW!
I see you found that when we go back through the posts, (as WN did too), we find you guys being negative towards women in general and in particular time and time again. And I'm so glad you noticed that this gets seriously in your way of finding a partner. You now understand that most women these days avoid a guy with these attitudes, too. You've been looking for a relationship for 2 years, TW, and Marcus has been on RSVP for 9 years, so I understand that you don't fancy your chances, but try harder, and you will succeed!.
You guys write some very good stuff on other topics, and are really entertaining at times. Marcus's picture of me in business socks was very funny the other day, and I don't mind being the butt of some genuine humour. Keep this sort of thing up, abut eliminate the woman-bashing stuff. Put that stuff in your metaphorical laundromat, boys, and give it a good sudsing, to get rid of any lingering spots.
And if you are going to respond to my comments, either of you, could you make it courteous, reasoned, without personalised insults and generalised put downs, as I did?
Final Comment
I'm so glad you took a good hard look at your own attitudes to women, boys. There is still room for improvement, but if you try harder, you will succeed!. You have no doubt noticed that the acronym for your essay is ON a TWIG (Our Negativity Towards Women In General). That was deliberate...it was to remind you boys, who are both in your second half-century, that you have limited time left. I hope that you achieve success before you fall off that twig!
Posted by: waterbombe at July 15, 2008 10:40 AM
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 15, 2008 8:52 AM
Guilty consciences ?
What happen on the road, stays on the road?? Give me a break mate - i've been to enough bucks nights to know the beast within.
Don't mix religion up with morality (spiritual). in other words- "don't throw the baby out with the bath water", know the difference.
Posted by: eatsrootsandleaves at July 15, 2008 10:39 AM
Fromheretoeternaty, July 14 @ 8:53 PM,
what a lovely idea, although then you'd have to go through adolescence all over again!
Yuk!
I can hardly even remember ever feeling so worry-free. Even at the tender age of eight, I was well aware of the problems of adults and their world!
I hope it was different for my children, I really do. (But sadly on refelection, my ex and I had such a troubled marriage, it probably wasn't exactly like this for them either)
I read your post about running through mine-fields aged 7, so this couldn't have been written from your child-hood memories of being an 8 year old!
Can you tell us who wrote it?
What a wonderful childhood they must have had!
Posted by: amberlight58 at July 15, 2008 10:38 AM
Posted by: naturalwoman08 at July 14, 2008 11:08 PM
Yes, it is a bit like that ...thanks for clapping
Posted by: oldergent at July 14, 2008 9:52 PM Thank you ...yes a poets corner would be great
Posted by: tassiefilly at July 14, 2008 11:36 PM Sorry about that I posted reply to tassiedude1 hehe - please see my comments there
Posted by: fromheretoeternaty at July 15, 2008 10:34 AM
Saying 'many women' are not worth talking to is dreadful, TW. You actually suggested Waternymph "talk to the men on here instead of the women" ... meaning men like you I guess. So much of this negativity towards women in general comes from you and Marcus (and OG when he was around) . How about you and Marcus study the posts of the other guys on here. You can write an essay...go on...compare and contrast yourselves with them...do they consistently make insults towards individual women on here, do they often put women down as a group, do they constantly objectify women's bodies?. What counts is serious comments, (not jokes like Grego's boobs-bum competition on the other blog).
Go on, have a go now, and I'll come back after recess and mark it for you.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 15, 2008 10:21 AM
Ha ha Marcus, you sound like a man of my dad's generation, telling me I have "a wilful display of obstinacy".Very 1950s of you.
Posted by: waterbombe at July 15, 2008 10:19 AM
Posted by: tassiefilly at July 14, 2008 11:36
like to think that I never actually left my childhood behind, the mirrors just lie to me ;-
The mirror never changes - only our perception and you are right the child within lives
Posted by: fromheretoeternaty at July 15, 2008 10:02 AM
Posted by: waterbombe at July 14, 2008 9:53 PM whilst the poem does suggest 8 years old -no credit card required, it does take me back to the year I arrived in Australia and could not speak the language.The year before that was even more amazing- running through a minefield in order to save my life - mind blowing for a 7 year old, but, I did not know that at the time
Posted by: fromheretoeternaty at July 15, 2008 9:58 AM
Posted by: tassiedude1 at July 14, 2008 9:52 PM
Did you write that because it's simply beautiful. Tag
Thanks....I think we all need to be reminded from time to time to bring out the child within to play.
Because, there is one thing I do know, and that is:
" Life is risky - because you are not going to get out of it alive "
So, you may as well be doing something Grand ! and fun too !
Posted by: fromheretoeternaty at July 15, 2008 9:45 AM
poochesinperth at July 14, 2008 9:21 AM
I went to a party once with a bisexual solicitor I met in a pub who was big enough to knock you out. It turns out she was USING me to upset her lesbian girlfriend, but all that is another story. Anyway the gay hosts of this party were a couple of males, one older and his younger semi toy boy who while being excellent hosts were having running a meltdown argument over the latest kitchen renovation. I don't know the details but it was the third new kitchen in the four years they had lived there and according to my companion the original one had nothing wrong with it.
Malsie.. a bit of slippage with my statement you picked up on. I didn't suggest violence in a domestic situation was going to make a braoder more masculine point that I won't now.
Waterbombe the stuff that you read on nature versus nurture is feminist inspired and out of date and it is dishonest of you to suggest it has equal weight and credence with proper, scientific studies. Science does not have a sex or gender bias; feminism is by definition heavily skewed and as far as I know does not research and has not produced a single academic who can make the case that you claim even decently. It is only ever about subjectivity. Every day the evidence for sex differences being biological, and thus evolutionary, increases. Why on average are the strongest women (who are probably all on their way to Beijing) usually a third to half that of a similarly conditioned man? Trying to pretend nurture is responsible is an affront to intelligent women and of course men (but not mad femmos) and a wilful display of obstinacy.
Those who claim moral degeneracy grows out of brothels probably have guilty consciences from what grew when they were within one. Much more likely to find great evidence of moral and other systematically perpetrated degeneracy and dishonesty hanging round the Pope like a fetid smell. In Nicaragua the compassionate church he represents has women brought to hospital after an illegal abortion has gone bad examined for evidence, a priest and police are called in, her womb is declared a crime scene and then she is jailed for up to 15 years. All this of course because said church denies them information about their fertility and of course the pill or even condoms. And despite WB's suggestion that 17 youngsters is a good number some parents do recognise that 1 or 2 makes more sense.
I believe the pontiff has a very expensive fashion house design his ridiculous garments. Why can't he just wear a pair of woollen trousers and a nice shirt?
Cheers Marcus
Posted by: laughsandtalks at July 15, 2008 8:52 AM
K - Actually I played a few holes of golf with the pope yesterday, and i loved his golf buggy - has it totally pimped out !
( FYI - he wears Prada & Gucci ! ummm - kinda explains the red shoes; and a few other things ! )
Anyhow - i told him about you gals, and he told me a joke -
" Three nuns on a train had been getting to know one another and decided to tell each other what their greatest sins were.
The first nun says, "My greatest sin is sex.
Every year I go out for a week and work as a p
OG @ 5.11 - you're welcome! With age often comes the patience, confidence and skill to explore sexuality in all its forms.
Kurli @ 7.27 (hi! :-) Yes, I believe you... it just is less and less of an option to _find_ another partner the older a woman gets, because the men check out so much earlier. Hence, pairing up with an older man adds to that likely alone time. Perhaps I'll finally 'jump the fence' and take up with a Harley-riding 70yo femme, when the time comes.
Posted by: playfulhelen at July 18, 2008 12:50 AM