RSVP Blog

Wnw
You always have the ability to make me laugh.
As you know I do like shoes and have quite a collection, which incidentally have added to whilst being down here.
But I'm not sure I want someone elses too... the leather might just rub me the wrong way ;)
Well it's a beautiful day here, and I'm off and have plans for the afternoon so I best turn my music up and scoot off to get ready.
Hugs

Posted by: gypsynurse at February 12, 2008 10:29 AM

Hmm, what is that saying... you must walk a mile in someones shoes before you can judge them.
Posted by: gypsynurse at February 11, 2008 9:19 PM

Gypsynurse ... the saying I like is, if you don't like someone .... before you judge them first walk a mile in their shoes ..... then you'll be a mile away from them and you'll have their shoes.

Posted by: woodnwine at February 12, 2008 8:40 AM

blueeyes: I like the idea of dying with memories. It's a bit like realising that no-one dies regretting something they *didn't* do.
Posted by: archerrising at February 11, 2008 9:04 PM

Archerrising ... I think you have this the wrong way around. The generally accepted saying is that when you are dying, it is the things you didn't do that you regret, not the things you did do. Oh, if only I had no regrets ....

Posted by: woodnwine at February 12, 2008 8:35 AM

victoriadownunder: it was a great day, it was fantastic to meet you and you and I are going to have some fun soon!!!!! So call me already ....

ridersonthestorm74: if I send it again (for the same reason) will you reject it?

auntykaz - what about this weekend?

notgodsgift: two weeks and counting .... cant wait

archerrising: hows the head? do you have my number? if not I will call you.
By the way, have unhidden profile for you to have a look and laugh.

To everyone at the Melbourne gathering, thank you for a wonderful Saturday and Sunday, it was a blast.

Posted by: willow1059 at February 11, 2008 9:46 PM:
Of course I did. Is my frog still alive and keeping you entertained? I hope that you have been feeding him well. The others are enjoying their new found space.
If he gets annoying, just let me know and I will come and get him.

Posted by: kittenheelsxx at February 12, 2008 6:32 AM

I'm an exhausted blogger after the Melbourne gathering and it's taken till now to get up to date after a very long day at work.

Rider, so sorry not to catch up with you at lunch but I must commend you for a very clever post earlier. Well done and I look forward to meeting you next time!

To the new arrivals that I was lucky enough to meet, my thanks for your company. Without exception, you were all delightful people and I am very glad to have made your acquaintance, and I truly look forward to catching up with all of you again.

My attempt at staying on topic is to tell all of you this right now!!!

My bed is calling....

Cheers,

Lesley

Posted by: victoriadownunder at February 12, 2008 1:01 AM

Hi all,
Reading the blogs my first time in here. Went back aways thru them and a parable came to mind.

The Little Bird.
A little bird flying through the snow when its' wings ice up and plop, it falls to the ground. The snow keeps falling and the little bird is literally getting frozen.
It starts crying out, help ? help ?
A cow hears the little bird and wanders over. Can I help you little bird ?
The bird says .. I'm freezing and gonna die.
The cow thinks about it and says .. not sure what I can do .. can't sit next to you, don't want to risk squashing you so .. hmmm.
Hang on a minute. How about I drop a cow pat on you ? That will warm you up.
Just stick your head up so you can breathe.
The cow drops the cow pat on the bird and sure enough the little bird sticks his head out and is warm and safe.
The little bird sits back waiting out the snow storm thinking how lucky he is to have a good friend from such an unexpected place. ?
Then the storm passes and the little bird goes to fly off. To his dismay .. the cowpat has dried out solid trapping the bird in his warm safety.
Again the little bird cries out, help ? help ?
A passing fox hears his cry and checks it out. Good one thinks the fox. I'm hungry and you're mine little bird.
The fox goes over to the bird and says, can I help you little birdy ?
The bird tells him he is stuck in the cowpat. The fox says I'll dig you out. (secretly licking his lips in anticipation).
The little bird asks the fox, you aren't going to try to eat me are you ? The fox reassures him, no worries, I've just eaten. It's my good deed for the day. And starts digging the bird out.
Then. Just as the fox is about to grab him, the little bird sees the glint in his eye and breaks out, flying off to safety.
The moral of the story is :
It's friends with good intentions that can get you in the poop.
And it's your enemies that can set you free.

Posted by: steffens50 at February 12, 2008 12:32 AM

Bob,

It was a great day had by all and looks like I did miss a great night ! I am looking forward to the next get together.

Good people, great laugh's and such HONESTY ! what more could a person ask for?

Date ? that was before the luncheon but the play I watched that night was a bit of yawn !!! I should have hung around !

Next time...stupid me :)

Posted by: ridersonthestorm74 at February 12, 2008 12:31 AM

Ridersonthestorm, witty for after midnight!!

Glad you enjoyed lunch with everyone, l didn't get there this time but l think you got the gist of how cool everyone who attended was....well l reckon they are anyway.........K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 12, 2008 12:31 AM

Hey Rider,

It was good to meet you on Saturday mate; shame you had to leave early and miss out on the evenings festivities. Still, sure that your date was worth the effort.

Looking forward to catching up with you next time.

Bob

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 12, 2008 12:20 AM

rider, excellent effort. Now I can remain innocent.

Posted by: willow1059 at February 12, 2008 12:17 AM

blueeyes 10:28 Mango or banana cake-mum's recipe -willow

Blueeyes, my Mum told me I couldn't have my cake and eat it too. Banana please, just to smell.

Posted by: willow1059 at February 12, 2008 12:15 AM

Hi ninaschen and the rest of the Melbourne Blogfest!

Just a bit of fun from me...enjoy :)

Hey JUNEBABY ! AUNTYKAZ has got a WATERBOMBE that will make KITTENHEELSXX WETA all over. TRUMPRIDER and his mate RIDERSONTHESTORM have decided to TIMEWARP out of here as they AMDOINGIT nothing to get into trouble! Whoops MISSWENDYXX don’t get ARCHERRISING or STRATUS will become a VICTORIANDOWNUNDER and as a bemused(hand on face) NINASCHEN looks around at the end of the table and says…you are not all NOTGODSGIFT !

Ridersonthestorm

Posted by: ridersonthestorm74 at February 12, 2008 12:11 AM

CAPTAIN KIRK'S PERSONAL CHEF @ 10.36pm on 10th:

Thanks for pointing me at a reference book, sir. I wouldn't have a clue where to look, which is why I'd asked you to point me in the right direction.

But why does brown sauce have a name that refers to Spain? I thought you'd know yourself, and be prepared to answer one of your students' questions, instead of sending me to the library?

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 12, 2008 12:05 AM

Hi Kate,

I actually got a similar reaction from my friends about RSVP, most were cool about it and more interested in how it was than anything else. A couple of my close mates actually are on here themselves, but just didn't mention it until I said I was here.

The best part is when you actually get to form new friendships that are real and not based on anything else other than an appreciation of who you are. I have been particularly fortunate to meet a nice diverse group of people here.......making new friends, but all over Australia.

Hi Malsie,

That is true though "unpleasant" is probably a major understatement of the nature of the beast that I had to confront 30+ years ago due to loss. The truth wasn't actually pointed out to me....the consequences of my actions on the person I had lost were (or on her spirit). I can still hear her mum saying to me "If S...... could see what her loss had done to you, she would be shattered)"...major wake-up call there.

Loss can be the most devastating experience, but if you allow it to bury your humanity....then the loss is of yourself, and you are finished.

Bob

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 11, 2008 11:24 PM

to myspace, thanks again and it is rather cute.And to greattimes, definitely no horror,and it isn't too late- it's not my bedtime yet.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 10:40 PM

blueeyes, I now its late, but peeked at your profile. Thought you might enjoy some horror!! ;-)
GTTC

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 11, 2008 10:32 PM

Blueeyes1955.
Your welcome, and if you turned around, I bet it would look great. lol.

Posted by: myownspace at February 11, 2008 10:32 PM

Hi, Bob

I think we've all had to face some "unpleasant" stuff about ourselves from time to time. Being able to face up to it and learn from it, rather than burying our heads in the sand and pretending it's all "rubbish", is where all the real growth comes, in my opinion.
It's lovely when friends and other loved ones buoy us up and say positive things that make us feel good about ourselves. Sometimes, though, what the most loving and caring thing is, is actually the truth that may not paint us in the positive light we'd like to see ourselves in. As long as that's done in a gentle way with good intention, it can be a great insight.

Posted by: malsie at February 11, 2008 10:30 PM

Mango or banana cake-mum's recipe -willow

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 10:28 PM

tea or coffee, milk or sugar. i'm having green tea willow.Do you like cake too?

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 10:26 PM

blueyes has it boiled yet, very slow kettle. Contact your electrician.

Posted by: willow1059 at February 11, 2008 10:21 PM

myspace-thanks for the compliment and to magellan- read the profile and it will answer your question

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 10:11 PM

neuroticfish...

I'd hope your comment re sending people a photo of my vehicle if they should want it.. well.. let's just say I'd advise against it.

The photo was on my profile, as you mention. My profile is now hidden. Your having kept a photo from it is, I would suggest, inappropriate. Offering to send it to others without my permission? I'd suggest that was unethical & worrying.

I'm hoping your remark was made in jest.

Posted by: decoratress at February 11, 2008 10:09 PM

willow , the kettle is on.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 10:05 PM

Willow....you should do both, send flowers to yourself (just incase no one else does) and eat them, then put them in the garden bed and sleep on them. I recall a very comfy garden bed in your backyard...should be the perfect place for the perfect frog!

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 11, 2008 10:04 PM

Hi guys

Well I may soon have Pixi on my back as well, as i feel i might hide my profile, but still come on here.

The reason for this decision might be that, deep down I really dont want a relationship.

Strage that, I always thought I needed a woman to help me feel complete. Well up to today that was.

I jumped on the bus to AAMI stadium, ready to buy a membership of the Crows, that would give me priority to purchase the occasional ticket for the occasional game.

While walking around the perimeter of the ground, I first came upon the SANFL admin area and it was in there I found I could purchase a season ticket, in the premium area of the ground (for approximatly the price of a return air ticket to Perth).

This left me in such a state of confusion, I returned home just buying a Crows Tshirt, but with papers for both membership options in my bag.

Couple this with my intention to jump on the train and go to the Casino to watch all West Coast Eagles games, and it struck me.

What sort of woman would want to be in a relationship given the fact that most weekend time will be taken up with other activities?

Posted by: virgil at February 11, 2008 10:03 PM

I know when I first joined rsvp I was embarrassed to tell anyone I was on it. But its become more mainstream now and not something to be ashamed of. Its just another way of meeting people...right??? I have older children and I think they would die if they knew their mother was on rsvp. Then again maybe thats just the way I think they would react. I must admit I did have a preconceived idea of peoples reactions and yet friends I have told didnt react with anything other than interest and wishes of good luck!! Anyway everyone, I enjoy reading all your different points of views and hope you have an enjoyable evening ,,,Kate

Posted by: kateegirl at February 11, 2008 9:56 PM

willow, I thought frogs ate insects.
Very poetic addition from you. Will look forward to your poetic efforts blogged this coming Thursday.
Does your mum know you are so clever as well as being on this site?

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 9:53 PM

blueeyes, we can have a virtual coffee, must easier than flying.

Posted by: willow1059 at February 11, 2008 9:52 PM

Willow - She did. I will express post them to you tomorrow. They may be a little hungry so have a bone or two handy.

Have a little BlogFest money jar on your infamous kitchen bench and add a copper or two from time-to-time so you can come to the next one. We shall put you in charge of catering.

Posted by: ninaschen at February 11, 2008 9:52 PM

nina, sounds like a blogfest orgy of fun and frivolity on the weekend.

I see my favourite felinexx attended, did she return the dog and my leopards?

Oh, what I could do with the names that attended, a story of lust far too rich for here!

Posted by: willow1059 at February 11, 2008 9:46 PM

blueeyes, thankyou I have caught your kiss. What a dilemma I now face for I have become two frogs in the space of just two handfuls of posts.

Tonight has been so rewarding, for now I can accompany myself as mutual frogs on Valentines Day. Do frogs send each other flowers, if I send them to myself should I look at them or eat them. Can frogs eat flowers or should I lay upon them gazing at the stars.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Frog on flower bed
I gaze upon you

Posted by: willow1059 at February 11, 2008 9:38 PM

I'm giving fair warning to those who would normally roll their eyes at a reference to the Melbourne BlogFest - skip this post!

It was a fantastic weekend, I think most would agree. There were some who had met before and others that joined in the fun for the first time. EVERYONE was absolutely wonderful and it was a very special weekend.

For the record, those who came along at some stage were:

Waterbombe
NotGodsGift
KittenHeelsXX
Weta
RidersOnTheStorm
Stratus
AuntyKaz
VictoriaDownUnder
TrumpRider
TimeWarp
ArcherRising
MissWendyXX
AmDoingIt
JuneBaby
And Me

I hope I didn't forget anyone! You are all delightful people and I hope we can do it again one day (soon!).

Posted by: ninaschen at February 11, 2008 9:38 PM

Mystiemuse,

On our profiles under "Movies and TV", the incidence of "Shawshank Redeption" is just too high to be anything other than people writing what they think other people want....like "walks along the beach", etc.

The incidence of travelling might come under this same category of Shawshank Redemption - sure plenty love to travel, but is it a ploy to attract kisses?

Bob

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 11, 2008 9:35 PM

Willow, I'd love to have coffee with you. Just let me book the plane fares first, unless you are really the frog prince and will send my carriage for me.Are escargots on the menu too?

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 9:34 PM

Bob 11 Feb 1:14 PM "Maybe rather than read each others posts we all should read our own posts in order to discover just what sort of people we really are."

Oh dear, having applied this to my own post at 8:48PM I realise I have just turned myself into a frog.

I ask myself, how will my employer view this in the morning. Shall I take a leap of faith into the unknown. What fate awaits me upon landing?

Will it be a voyage of discovery into a distant and romantic land or will a French dinner plate await with my legs being on the menu.

I say having discovered the error of my ways, in future read earlier posts BEFORE doing your own.

Who should I tell and when this blog asks, in these circumstances I shall tell no-one since I cannot speak.

Posted by: willow1059 at February 11, 2008 9:22 PM

Been reading back in this blog, and got to the section where mothers with children still living at home seemed to have an issue with fathers who don't have children living at home travelling.
As a mother who doesn't have her children living at home {(not my choice) and as it's a private matter I'm not discussing here in this forum for open dissection, which happens here with everything}, I find your comments very biased and they appear somewhat bitter, as though someone else has gotten the better end of the stick. The stick is just different, there is no such thing as the better end!
Sometimes either sex parent doesn't have children living at home for what ever reason. This can be difficult for the non custodial parent, fianancially and emotionally.
I for one would gladly swap that time to be able to take off overseas at a moments notice cause I don't have the children at home for having the kids lounging around on the couch fighting them for the stereo.
But then perhaps I value what I don't have and understand what it is. I am sure there are many non custodial fathers that miss the same.
So I stand in defence of these men who have the time to travel, because when you don't have your kids to fill your time you fill it with other things.
You will miss your children when they are no longer with you.
Enjoy them while you have them cause the time is short.
Hmm, what is that saying... you must walk a mile in someones shoes before you can judge them.

Posted by: gypsynurse at February 11, 2008 9:19 PM

Willow, just sent you your third kiss personally. And at the end of my rainbow is hopefully a pot full of happiness being held by my frog-prince. Your profile is great-it put a big smile on my face.Shame you are only days away.And I do think your "cool photo" is the best. Next time I visit Mitcham I'll look for you in the local pond.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 9:18 PM

I'm sorry Bob, but you have lost me with the *Shawshack Redemption* analogy, as I have not seen the film, or really know anything about it. But all I can say is, lucky Sydney women, they should start hooking up with the Brissy men....:-)

Posted by: mystiemuse at February 11, 2008 9:18 PM

Bob 11 Feb 1:14 PM "Maybe rather than read each others posts we all should read our own posts in order to discover just what sort of people we really are.

I wonder how many of us would be truly disappointed if we could see what we really are and our attitudes have become towards others?"

Bob, as always well spoken. Any new bodaciously good words from you today?

Posted by: willow1059 at February 11, 2008 9:08 PM

blueeyes: I like the idea of dying with memories. It's a bit like realising that no-one dies regretting something they *didn't* do. So, like Princess Mitsy of Monty Python fame, I'll keep going through life "hopefully kissing frogs".

Hi Bob,
It was a good day, wasn't it? I'm glad you enjoyed our fair city.

Posted by: archerrising at February 11, 2008 9:04 PM

blueeyes 8:5PM And as for frogs-I thought they turned into princes when kissed.xx

Thanks for the tip, never did get to see the ending. Now I know what has been wrong for the last few years, I need to find a kiss.

Any at the end of that rainbow?

You have sent two, is that enough?

Posted by: willow1059 at February 11, 2008 9:03 PM

Hi Archerrising,

It was terrific to meet and talk to you too, I hope you had a good time, I certainly did; what a great crowd.

Mystiemuse,

Seems that there are plenty of women in Sydney in your age group are in the position to go overseas all of the time, but maybe its one of those "Shawshank Redemption" type responses?

Bob

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 11, 2008 8:57 PM

Brownie points for Willow, he actually reads profiles for the info. And no, I don't need a parachute-can have lots of excitement without the need for a parachute although I'm sure your hands are strong enough to catch me. And as for frogs-I thought they turned into princes when kissed.xx

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 8:55 PM

I'm quite big on sayings archer and one I read on this site was- die with memories not dreams. You can make things happen and if you live with a positive attitude and a " I know I can" philosophy then many opportunities will open up to you. When you start these dating experiences we all have doubts about our own appeal to others but noone will come knocking on your door-you have to get out there despite what your kids think. I'm sure mine are glad that I haven't got the time to cling to them like plastic wrap. They have to make their own way and sometimes so do we. It's an exciting road ahead no matter which detour you take along the way.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 8:49 PM

@femalepersuasion February 10 2008 at 11.10pm.....

...."Think the best of people..and you will see it.".....

....reminds me of another salient aphorism.....

....."Physician, heal thyself".....

Posted by: weta at February 11, 2008 8:49 PM

blueeyes 11 Feb 7:44PM "I'm flattered that some females are checking out my profile but would one of you guys please look so i can see a handsome gent looking at me. It might earn you extra brownie points."

Wish fulfilled, you can stop chasing it over the rainbow now. Be careful, it is a very long way to fall. Do you wear a parachute? Not sure I can qualify for the handsome gent bit, do frogs count, I only turn green after a big night out.

Sorry it took so long, you used an 8 letter password, I almost ran out of fingers to count them.

Posted by: willow1059 at February 11, 2008 8:48 PM

Beware the Jabberwock, my dear!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!

She took her vorpal blade in hand;
Long time the manxome foe she sought-
So rested she by the Tumtum tree,
And stood a while in thought,
A pound of cheese you scum,
And brekky at Yon Ronald’s
Don’t buy your way into this gals britches,
I’m off to sleep with Sir Rickets,
And leave you in your miserly stitches.

And, as in uffish thought she stood,
The jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
She left it dead, and with its head
She went galumphing back.

"And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish girl!
O frabjous day! Callooh, Callay!"
He chortled in his joy.
Well you have to laugh don’t you.

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 11, 2008 8:47 PM

:) you're absolutely right blueeyes. I'm sure the kids are horrified by the prospect of me hanging around them for evermore, lol.
And well done to you! I've started rediscovering myself and have a few more plans in the pipeline. It's a lot of fun realising (again) that I'm an adult and I can do what I want.

Posted by: archerrising at February 11, 2008 8:35 PM

Reinvent or rather re-discover yoursself is right. 4 years ago I was married with a family of 3 teenagers. In a very short time it was down to just me. So I made a list of things I always wanted to do but couldn't because of money of family restrictions . I took up dancing-the ex never wanted to do that, I rethought how to cook for one,(often cook for 5 and freeze it so i don't have to cook every night), I took my first overseas trip,did renos on my home that the ex didn't want to spend the moneyand in recent school holidays painted the 'bigger than ben hur' underwater mural on a very large wall in my garage. Not to mention putting myself out there because we are all worthwhile people and need a special person just for us.You are a long time dead so start thinking of things YOU want to do and enjoy. Your kids will only praise you for moving forward.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 8:22 PM

blueeyes: I am looking forward to it, but in another way I'm sad about it. This feeling has surprised me because I've never really defined myself as a mother. What I've discovered is that I've gotten very used to thinking about the kids as the reasons why I do or don't do something. And then all of a sudden it seems, I can see that they'll be moving on in the not too distant future. It means having to re-think my reasons for doing things and also re-inventing myself by trying to work out (or remember) what it is that I like(d) doing.

Posted by: archerrising at February 11, 2008 8:07 PM

Thanks DG singing but a face to look at would be lovely.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 8:06 PM

If I sent mine to the ex's they would run rings around him. He isn't quite the same since having a brain anneurysm which left him with the inability to cope with teenagers in general let alone their problems. I didn't have the luxury of having an alternative roof for them. But it is a whole new world ahead of you when they do become independant and you do get your freedom back again. Look forward to it-it has lots of bonuses.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 8:02 PM

blueeyes1955: lol
My kids would get in less trouble alone than with my ex. Sad, but true and I suspect I'm not the only one ...

Bob: nice to meet you on Saturday.

Posted by: archerrising at February 11, 2008 7:52 PM

I'm flattered that some females are checking out my profile but would one of you guys please look so i can see a handsome gent looking at me. It might earn you extra brownie points.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 7:44 PM

Last year I took some long service leave and tripped over to the UK. My youngest (19)was living with her boyfriend (not my choice) so I had the freedom but if she was still at home I may have thought twice about it-just in case the house wasn't standing when I returned. I guess you could always try leaving the kids with your ex's while you go on these trips we are expected to be able to run off to.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 7:41 PM

Kat,
Got your kiss (thanks) but your profile is down so I can't reply. I must have had a good time on Saturday because I was very unwell yesterday.

Posted by: archerrising at February 11, 2008 7:40 PM

in a good way

Posted by: archerrising at February 11, 2008 7:37 PM

Oh, and the bit about people being different? I meant a good way.

Posted by: archerrising at February 11, 2008 7:36 PM

mystiemuse at February 11, 2008 7:07 PM

I'm the same age as you and although my kids are in their teens, they aren't old enough to be left alone while I go traipsing around the world. And even if they were - who's going to pay the mortgage? My favourite men's profiles are the ones that want a woman who has kids living at home sometimes. What the hell??? Are there any such women?

Posted by: woodnwine at February 11, 2008 3:08 PM
I found out that people can be different from their profiles and their posts at the bloggers' meet on Saturday.
I also re-learned a lesson that it's bad news for me to mix the grain and the grape ...

Posted by: archerrising at February 11, 2008 7:36 PM

Bob thanks for that overview, but I already knew what the reason they could do this was. What I wanted to know was who did they expect would be able to go with them? I know they are out there, but not many women in my age group (43 for the record) are free to just get up and run away to paradise, I just wanted to know if other women thought that was codswallop or that they agreed...... Thanks though ... :-) You were the only one who actually answered me!

Posted by: mystiemuse at February 11, 2008 7:07 PM

If anyone is worried about Decoratrix hiding her profile, I can send a pic of that van of hers.

I kept a photo as if I ever see it coming I might safely pull over on the verge and let it pass.

Help! or was that Yelp!

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 11, 2008 6:42 PM

Wnw some people cannot distinguish between constructive criticism and bad mouthing, whether the they are the initiator or the receiver....thats why things get a bit heated and slightly off the wall so to speak.....

lm all for discussion and a generally healthy debate without having others opinions shoved down my throat.....

And to keep slightly on topic online dating who to tell and when to tell it, you know what, l think l am over it...................K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 11, 2008 6:37 PM

And what do my kids think of me being here? I don't really think they listen to a word I say. Almost 20 year old daughter is supposed to be cooking dinner tonight since she doesn't work Mondays. Just went to investigate what might be on the menu since am feeling rather hungry and where is she? Fast asleep in bed.Can't wait so am heating up leftovers. She can fend for herself.
Lesson for me? Do my own thing.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 6:21 PM

If any of us reached our ages without some problems or gained baggage of some sort then you would have to think we have not lived. Each of these experiences make us who we are and hopefully we learn from them and move forward.
You can't change yesterday and today is a new day. I also don't believe in spending time with extremely negative people. Why would you unless you thought you had something to gain. But then why sell your soul to the devil and put up with "s**t". The cost is not worth it. More flies are caught with honey than with vinegar.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 11, 2008 5:21 PM

Yes Bob, most people have problems or situations in their lives that they need to manage or deal with. Some can be resolved, some have to be lived with. None of us is perfect and if we can understand our faults .... even if it is too late and they have already caused us to lose someone special .... then we can try to become better people as a result.

Life is a huge learning curve and each person we meet can tell or teach us something about life and about ourselves, our insecurities and our quirks. Bad mouthing people doesn't generally achieve understanding or growth for either party, constructive criticism however can. Isn't discussion what it should all be about?

Posted by: woodnwine at February 11, 2008 4:57 PM

Hi WnW, Malsie,

I have had to have a few reality checks of myself during my lifetime for various reasons.......what I saw wasn't pleasant, but it took someone that I really cared about on each occasion to point me in the right direction (not point out my faults).

Loss is a killer (whether that is loss of partner, loss of family, loss of a friend or loss of oneself) - I didn't want to be bitter and twisted all my life, it hurt too much...hurt me deeply, but mostly hurt the people who cared about me.

Before the vultures jump on this let me just say this......go ahead if you must, but think about your own situation whilst you do it.

Bob

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 11, 2008 4:33 PM

WnW - yes, indeed, I would say a small "snippet" of you! Some of your caring and kind attitude comes across, but as someone who knows you outside of "the temple", I would say what's read in here is only a small insight into that.

Posted by: malsie at February 11, 2008 4:03 PM

Good comments Bob, keep them coming .... you are in good form today.
Remember that people can turn out to be quite different to the perception people have of them from reading the blogs. I wouldn't mind a free dinner for every time someone has told me I am quite different in "real" life to what they thought I would be from reading my blogs .... maybe I need to do a reality check, or is it that my blogs are just a very small snipit of me?

Posted by: woodnwine at February 11, 2008 3:08 PM

rsvpiper, I believe how people come across in the blogs is a part of them, for sure. Sometimes it may be a part they might otherwise prefer not to reveal to the world but reactivity occurs, things get said; someone else reacts and so goes the vicious cycle.... but that is not the sum total of that person, just a snippet - a moment in time - and a moment in time in what continually shows itself to be a rather peculiar forum on occasions .....

at that is all it is, just a part, and certainly not the "whole" person by any means.

Posted by: malsie at February 11, 2008 2:56 PM

Hi Decoratress,

Isn't it though......if we each had a better insight into our own character then perhaps finding a partner would not be that difficult after all.

Opinions are opinions...who wants or needs to be right all the time anyway especially when, in so many cases, there is no right or wrong - just opinions gained from different life experiences. Its those that cant accept that other people have valid reasons for their actions, or opinions formed from different life experiences that need to have a harder look at themselves.

Bob

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 11, 2008 2:54 PM

notgodsgift...

"..but can we be honest about ourselves?"

It's one of the most difficult things to do- objectively look at ourselves.
It takes self-discipline & focus to remove the emotional reactions attached to "I am right".

Quite simply, we are never 'always right'.

How we are perceived by others is something we can never be sure of. The only way to find out, is to be prepared to listen to what they're saying.

Posted by: decoratress at February 11, 2008 2:40 PM

Hi Mystiemuse,

From my viewpoint the answer to your question is obvious; mum has gotten custody of the kids so dad is off enjoying himself - maybe an oversimplification of the situation, but would put money on it that this is a big part of the answer.

Decoratress,

Great idea for a topic. Its easy for us to be critical of others and their opinions, but can we be honest about ourselves?

Bob

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 11, 2008 2:28 PM

rsviper....

Thank you for your constructive criticism. I take on board what you've said & will give it the attention it deserves.

notgodsgift....

Excellent idea! Let's all go back & read our own posts. Perhaps we could suggest a new topic to rsvp....
"What I Saw When I Looked At Myself"..?

None of us are perfect, but I thought we all knew that.
Like others before me, I think I'll take a break from these blogs for a while.... the sun's shining & life's too short.

Posted by: decoratress at February 11, 2008 1:53 PM

Okay, we all have some stepping back and gathering of our dignities to do, so as we can regain some shread of credibility to our opinions, at times. Perhaps a few of you should just "Chill" a little....... :-)
But I do have a question to those women on here reading the blogs about my age with children. How many of you could take the time right now and travel the world? Because it seems that most of the men in my age group can. Yes I would love to be able to partake myself, but responsibilities make it highly unlikely. So if anyone is actually reading this, male as well as female...I would love to hear your comments.
Cheers

Posted by: mystiemuse at February 11, 2008 1:47 PM

Exactamundo Viper,

Maybe rather than read each others posts we all should read our own posts in order to discover just what sort of people we really are.

I wonder how many of us would be truly disappointed if we could see what we really are and our attitudes have become towards others?

Bob

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 11, 2008 1:14 PM

Yawn ................

Posted by: woodnwine at February 11, 2008 1:10 PM

Be alert not alarmed.

Hi all, I'm just passing this way, and while not a lurker, or a blogger I am prompted to make a post.

It seems that there are a few 'international and national scammers' on the site at the moment - so a warning.

My alerts were 1/insist on chat ( I do not chat) Both within RSVP and external 2/insist on email to 'ask a few questions before calling.3/ Refusal/inability to phone or leave a phone number that I can call back.

Use Search Engines -
Quick google searches of handles, and provided 'email' name quickly produce scammer alerts from a variety of internet sites if they are serial - wich indicates to e that there will be intent on scamming at some level, not just a pain. Content of email - while couched in precautionary/careful tones are poorly written when compared to profile style and content. They seem to love being employed as 'investers' and live within small distance of CBD, more flexible in age preference, and 'ready for a relationship' after x years. They depict themselves as 'picky'. Most of the email content plays into 'fears of the online dating world' and describe the vision of what everyone would want in a partner at an emotional level in simple sentences.

While I understand that many are worried about giving out mobile telephone numbers to strangers ( in fact I think some advice sites discourage this) its worth remembering that sms and mobile telephone numbers are instantly trackable and historically recorded in Australia - not only an account holder, but to the specific individual, name, address and location of call, even if routed through different locations and this data is held for years) This includes prepaid mobiles. Any 'issues' can be reported, a number can be blocked by your phone, and there are matters which breech the Telecommunications Act so legal authorities 'can make a visit' if need be and they will prosecute. 3 strikes and you are out.
Email only captures IP address, is not secure at any level.

I suspect that posting handles will for whatever reason be deleted but I am lerious about this.

Posted by: skygeisha at February 11, 2008 10:29 AM

“as it was way back when...:))”

you mean she is no longer Oozing.

Do you know the mud baths at Eulo dried up in the drought, but the recent rains have probably replenished them.

Nothing like a bit of trivia

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 11, 2008 7:53 AM

It's getting a bit like a schoolyard in here. With secret, and not so secret, alliances being formed, fawning behaviour from those who may fear becoming targets, and, classically, a couple of non-conforming individuals being picked on.
FemalePersuasion being one. For? Being self assured. proud, perhaps lacking a little humility?
Strangely, the main objection the bleating herd in here seem to have against her is her lack of inhibition with regard to one of her profile photos.
THAT kind of photo being deemed to only attract men with good eyesight but no brains. She therefore is relying on physical attributes, which are (and apparently she needs to be told this repeatedly) going to fade.
What I find strange about that though is that it seems backwards.
Confidence, being uninhibited and relaxed about ones appearance suggests courage, acceptance (of self and others) and willingness to engage. That lack of fear implies a high self-worth and is unlikely to attract men who can't get their attention above chest height. There's always a few (of them) about but, from my reading of the various blogs, the men who are SOLELY looking for physical...'satisfaction' have more luck with the low self-worth individuals. Because insecurity, doubt and a lack of confidence are easier to exploit.
By seeming to be a little TOO happy about her success some have judged her to be 'gloating' which is 'offensive'.
Maybe so, I guess bragging tactlessly about how much you enjoy running wouldn't go down too well in the spinal rehabilitation unit either.
But what does that say about the bulk (no pun intended) of the women in here? Success stories are offensive? Having a good strike rate is poor form?
mmm...I can see why winners would unacceptable at the losers club, is that what this is? A place to commiserate, share horror stories, laugh at jokes that denigrate men?
Maybe some of you should listen more and speak less if all you have to share is negativity.
cheers
lurker

Posted by: lurker (Not RSVP name) at August 10, 2007 12:05 AM

I think this very pertinent post is as apt now as it was way back when...:))

Posted by: istj54 at February 11, 2008 7:12 AM

Hi femalepersuasion...

Could this be something to do with the fact that I have disagreed with you in the past?

Can we move on & stop bitching?

Tell you what.....
..... let's ALL be nice!

oops..
that's sure to set the cat amongst the pigeons!!! ..which takes me verrry nicely to ..all those spoilt felines! Roast dinners!! Mind you, my dogs live a life of unmitigated ease & luxury.. our animal friends always love us!

(changing the subject often helps, I've found....)

Posted by: decoratress at February 10, 2008 11:51 PM

night all

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 11:47 PM

virgil no need for me to hide my profile as the uncle fester look is not working,yes meaning no kisses except for just the one from china,,,,,oh dear me.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 11:46 PM

If we hide our profile, we dont get kisses, that way, when we feel in a better space to properly respond to attention form the opposite sex, then we can put our profile back on.

Posted by: virgil at February 10, 2008 11:42 PM

Completely off topic I suppose, but is it really possible that every man on RSVP is adonisly fit and a master of every sport known to the world?? I am not against physical fitness, in fact I enjoy the gym when I can get the time and money to go....but come on guys, how will you ever get time for a partner if you are spending all your spare hours "being sporty spice".......

Posted by: mystiemuse at February 10, 2008 11:42 PM

femalepersuasion - the blogs are rarely related to dating on RSVP so people can blog to their heart's content whether they are looking, in a relationship or just taking a break. Presumably you are talking about decoratress ... she was not real in some past life ... she is real now, just the same as you are when you sometimes blog while your profile is temporarily hidden. Let's not stress over all this ... it means nothing really. More important issues in life I think.

Posted by: woodnwine at February 10, 2008 11:41 PM

lol @ wishfull 03 roast lamb with mint sc, now i fight my kittys for that mainly the bone love the bone , but when its roast chook they do get the better of me there, roast pork they aren't to happy with makes em fart during the night and when i ask em who it was they all look at me like im the guilty party!

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 11:33 PM

yes space cadet , as it is know as, espagnole then you would add estoufade, reduce to make demi glaze, you do know that oh maybe you didnt, try reading "herring's culinary dictionary

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 11:26 PM

Auntykaz: I have read the posts from both of the women you mentioned and they both seem pretty equal in verbal aggressiveness toward each other. To suggest one is more severe in attack than the the other seems to me like a biased judgement. I dont know either woman..do you?

Posted by: femalepersuasion at February 10, 2008 11:25 PM

heya auntyaz...!

Hope the weekend was as good as it was shaping up to be??!!

Posted by: decoratress at February 10, 2008 11:13 PM

Probably not a good time MOm4u to tell you that those foods are probably not the best thing for the kitty! However, as mine tucked into roast lamb and mint sauce tonight who am I to chastise you :) Pat the fur monsters and enjoy!

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 10, 2008 11:11 PM

Hi all. Just had a look on my way to my bunk, and see I've copped a good bit of flack since I posted this arvo.

I'd planned to avoid the addictive keyboard for the whole 6 days while I'm away, but they told my yesterday it was really worth a look.

After 11 straight hours of togetherness yesterday I was all listened out by midnight. And had probably talked for an hour myself, when I could mget a phrase in. It was a real gabfest.

But half a day trying to act my age in the hostel today got boring, so I had a look after lunch.

And was positively stirred by some of the good stuff like istj's good wishes for my trip and oldergent's pithy summing up on Fri? morning, and negatively stirred by some other people's copper-sticks, so had to respond.

MofaM4U: Very interested that the official name for brown sauce/gravy refers to Spain? Do you know why?

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 10, 2008 11:10 PM

If life isn’t hard enough facing possible job rejection, for those who feel the need to add more pain to life there is not only romantic rejection, but now perhaps a new found entity that I call ’blogg rejection”. Nothing like putting your self-esteem in the hands of another person who couldn't possibly care less about you, is there? Why do these people behave in this way?
There is no right or wrong as far as I can see, but the attacks on individuals and the cry of “she can say that because I know her” is at best a lame justification of abuse on a public site where most people don’t know each other, or at least blog publicly because they believe their opinions will be taken at face value. Strange, isn't it, how it's the really *harsh* rejections that are sometimes the easiest to disregard for obvious reasons.
I am used to being on the receiving end of rejection blogs, for the types of articles that I post. Responses from some of the uninformed are so utterly vicious, with a pedantic, weary tone of effete and contempt of someone responding to words for the simple reason that they have a bee in their bonnet about something or someone else- no doubt from their past.
Many nasty posts tonight each accusatory….. the hidden profiles versus the non hidden; the friends of the the hidden profiles coming to their rescue with claims of knowing them from some other life somewhere eons ago ( who cares, that’s not an argument) conveniently forgetting for that very reason alone their comments may not be current, and certainly not relevant on the current blogs.
The majority of the blogs tonight have all been vicious and attacking. And for what purpose exactly?? The blogs have been destroyed by a combination of “in” groups, “outgroups” ( those who no longer actively date or use RSVP to meet members of the opposite sex). All have the right to blog of course, but I just wonder why you all do, as it is certainly not to have any positive discussion or outcome.

And then there's the possibility of romantic rejection, followed straight after the blog rejection. Let's not even think about that, shall we? Liking/wanting someone who doesn't like/want you back? Shudder...

Think the best of people..and you will see it.

Posted by: femalepersuasion at February 10, 2008 11:10 PM

Sorry to hear that Jen...hope you get caught up! I have just received one of this semesters units, what a load I've got....less bloggin' time, more work I think!

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 10, 2008 11:03 PM

jen jen assignment, i always thought you a slow learner.and i bet you anything you like wishful03 gives her cat nibbles

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 11:00 PM

yes jen she loves her vegemite mainly on toast in the morning, with the kittens i dunk there bikkie in coffee to make it softer they love that to, i like me kids to try different foods and see what they like.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 10:58 PM

Hi wishful..............me too........way behind with my assignment :(

MOM4U..........vegemite on biscuit for your cat ?? Hmmmm coffee would be nice..........strong black and sweet please :)

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 10, 2008 10:55 PM

Nope Jen...still hanging around working and reading and blogging at the same time...

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 10, 2008 10:51 PM

just had to make my oldest cat a vegemite on a biscuit while i drank more coffee

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 10:49 PM

Looks like everyone else has toddled off though............

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 10, 2008 10:40 PM

you cheeky bugga, jen jen you got me there

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 10:36 PM

Late mom4u ??
Its only 9.32 here !!

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 10, 2008 10:32 PM

decoratress, "Its got me headf..ked" can i ask does that mean your into headbanging music heavy metal, must check your profile?
ps i know what you meant, roflmao

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 10:30 PM

lol jenjen i was about to ask you if you had a note from your mother for being up so late,,,,,,,,,heheheh cheeky bugga i am
No in all honesty i hate people who try to spoil the blog by their negativity, not here today has been really great.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 10:23 PM

No Pixie, 100% female, no question about my gender, so definitely not an "it", not even dishonest, as my profile is visible.

I'm wondering if you only accept emails from people, at home, work, or play, with "photos" attached - so you can be assured they are "real" too. Why does it matter, we are not lookin to date you - merely blog away in peace...

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 10, 2008 10:16 PM

pixiemagic, even though i agree with you on your reason for people hiding their profiles may seem dishonest, it is there choice if they so desire. It mainly means they will have little chance of possibly meeting that someone.
Some times people also use the wrong words while others take it as pointing the finger at them.
If someone doesn't have their pic up or hides their profile, i generally ignore them, unless their reason is a valid one. To me SSC is valid, to you maybe not, thats your decision as it is SSC'S to hide her profile.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 10:16 PM

Welcome back mom4u - where have you been hiding ?

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 10, 2008 10:09 PM

wishfulthinker03..another it??!!

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 10, 2008 10:06 PM

pixie - slightsynchronicity has hidden her profile tonight for a week or two while she takes some time out.
I hope we will still see her on the blogs.
Does that make her dishonest too ??

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 10, 2008 10:04 PM

Now so68 Brissy is just up the road ,turn right at the black stump then when you hit the ocean you gone to far.
If i leave now when will i get there,,,,,,,,,,,,,,lololol
night night girl your always welcome.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 9:59 PM

same here wishful, just dont like people looking for a bout or two with all their negative crap against other people. This is a good site. When your single it is really scary to date, you don't go to pubs or don't go out by yourself, so yeah i like most people here,lolol also if i want "verbal Diahera" to get the bowels moving.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 9:49 PM

Hey MoM4u, nice to see you back on deck.

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 10, 2008 9:28 PM

moreofaman4u - it's been lovely chatting with you and everyone. Things are looking up, I think RSVP may be ok after all. Look forward to chatting with you all again soon.

Take care! :-)

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 9:15 PM

RSVPViper,

Your post of 9/2 at 9.04......very funny...touche!!!

I take it you are quoting from the experience of your own preferences...knew there was a reason you hated women, but your expert opinion is duly noted.

Bob.

PS Sorry for the delay in responding but have just gotten back from Melbourne

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 10, 2008 9:10 PM

pbps, you know everyone has a butt, like they have an opinion. Now we tend to notice the size of ones rear end, does that mean we care about there opinion, no we don't ,but still we care about the size of their butt and other things we can see. Then why cant we see if their opinion is worth viewing?
Personaly its just me and the cats, they love a talk but balk at the coffee

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 8:58 PM

oldergent let me guess, your an ex navy or army cook. Yes you are correct, mainly as the terms as you have said them is the style of army cooks. As you have read my previous posts, yes i am a Chef, French Cuisine, also a Baker and pastry cook. I also teach commercial cookery@ Tafe, and give displays and courses in cookery in the community.
I give you respect for your knowledge over your many years, but i find, that many males and females when it comes to cookery, have no idea what they are doing.
Accepted i get paid to know my fare, and home people do not wish to travel this route, but want the same result. If they want to know how we do things i will tell, or recipes i will give. I will give anybody respect in return i wish the same thing. As for name calling,(not by you ) i have worked with chefs i wouldn't call a cook let alone a chef.
So for me when talking about food you have to know what your talking about be correct and specific.Mainly because if you forget one step in your method, to be honest my cats wouldn't smell it ,let alone eat it.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 8:42 PM

I openly discuss with my children, friends and family that I am a member of rsvp and that I'm enjoying my conversations immensely. If they agree or not they're entitled to their opinion. That doesn't stop me wanting them to share my life experiences.

Posted by: paperbagprincess at February 10, 2008 8:29 PM

I openly discuss with my children, friends and family that I am a member of rsvp and that I'm enjoying my conversations immensely. If they agree or not they're entitled to their opinion. That doesn't stop me wanting them to share my life experiences.

Posted by: paperbagprincess at February 10, 2008 8:28 PM

Hi, moreofaman4U,
you obviously are of a culinary bent. In the old days the way to make gravy/any way what you want to call it nowadays, was to take the pan juices, or what we called them ,browning, render them down to a semi solid, and to make a non lumpy sauce./gravy/ was to remove the pan from the heat, let it cool, add salt, and as you say, only plain flour, which had to be judged to the amount of volume wanted, cool to cold water added, stir till the right consistency looked OK then the heat re-applied, When it started to congeale, if too thick add cold water, if too thin render down, when right by taste, serve never let it cool down and re -warm, this and meat soups are the most dangerous of foods to cause food bacteria poisoning. moreman we might not be the most handsome men in captivity but by golly we can cook. LOL

Posted by: oldergent at February 10, 2008 8:26 PM

Wonder what happened after six hours when you fell to sleep...your mum could well be FD105...so be nice to daddy:))

Posted by: istj54 at February 10, 2008 8:22 PM

OMG twarp...you are back and as lengthy as ever!!

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 10, 2008 8:13 PM

NF lmao and how do you know he was giving you the eye all night, pls sorry i asked ,don't want to know.lololol you say the wrong things sometimes NF.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 8:06 PM

I want my Mummy!

Actually I was going to tell him about the last time I stayed in a Backpackers.

I had to share a room with a “male” who lay there stark naked on the opposite bunk and eyed me off all night.

But then again, he can find out these things all by his Big Boy self.

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 10, 2008 7:53 PM

darn your in Brissy

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 7:38 PM

Teehee yes I do!! *Waves it around in the air*

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 7:37 PM

That's great, Sophisticated...I didn't start looking till youngest was 21 and may have wasted a few years because of my son's opinions. I think we should trust our own opinions more than we do sometimes.

NF...if you cry for six hours you can then have a nap...and start all over again...don't be upset, he doesn't like me either...not gunna cry though...let's just hope they don't give him any coins at his next gabfest.

Posted by: istj54 at February 10, 2008 7:36 PM

so68 you do have a note from your mother don't you ?lololo

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 7:35 PM

A chef also knows when creme comes to the top, you can reduce it, now scum well is just that, but you already knew that didn't you spacecadet.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 7:33 PM

Well interestingly enough, my kids are right behind me being on here, they think I need to find someone special just for me. Now I'm talking about a 14, 12 and 11 year old here!

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 7:32 PM

Now I'm crying

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 10, 2008 7:26 PM

I have a question: How important are the opinions and views of our families and friends to us in regards to dating?
...after all they don't have to live with our choice...well they do if you are younger but not later in life.

I liked oldgent's view that his children didn't confer with him about their partners, so why should he? Good point!

Posted by: istj54 at February 10, 2008 7:25 PM

MOREOFAMANFOR SOMEONE @ 6.48pm:
A chef knows that cream rises to the surface, as well as scum.

NAUGHTYFISH: i DIDN'T LIKE THE EGOCENTRICITY OF YOURS AT 1.32 ON THE 9TH EITHER. sorry, toggle case. Running out of pennies for youth hostel treminal. Seeyezall in a few days.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 10, 2008 7:20 PM

My Dear,

At Hay Point ships have to wait days, even weeks, before they are allowed to enter port.

What I am saying is that port waiting time should not exceed 6 hours before being allowed to discharge cargo.

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 10, 2008 7:18 PM

ok thanks moreofaman4u - I can see how that would be annoying then in that case. So apologies for what I said below earlier. :-)

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 7:14 PM

so 68 you got it

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 7:10 PM

OLD GODDESS/FEMALE PER:

Sorry. The Posting gremlin stole the end of my last sentence to you, just then. (Or was it MsLash, trying to shorten my posts to the length she can manage at one sitting?)

It should have read

"If you acknowledged your sources, you'd get acknowledgement for their relevance and your diligent scholarship, instead of derision for being an O.L.D. COPYCAT"

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 10, 2008 7:08 PM

Be fair now.

Virgin wouldn’t let his wheelbarrow on as onboard luggage.

The man was labouring under considerable difficulties as it was having to entertain his mass audience.

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 10, 2008 6:53 PM

ISTJ @ 6.18am, 8th. Many thanks for your good wishes.

Had a happy time yesterday meeting Sydney Bob and the locals, but after 11 continuous hours of lunch, pub, then dinner, I had trouble climbing the midnite ladder to my Youth Hostel upper bunk.

Consulted my virtual scales and actual wallet this morning, and decided against soldiering on at their long lunch today. Emailing you instead.

ISTJ @ 8.37am on 9th: I am very grateful to you for your ongoing campaign to boost my image, but (with MY tongue not in my cheek,) you've got it back to front. Bob and I came to Honduras to bask in the combined sunshine of a dozen warm Victorian smiles, not vice versa.

ABCKENNY @ 3.21pm today and your ear-ringed culinary supporter @ 3.27:

You blokes are as homosensitive as Sydney Bob. For your information, Big K, I was checking you out to see if we should try to have our next Bloggermeet in Brisbane on a Saturday, so you could come. For the benefit of the many local blogfemmes, of course.

VIRGIL @6.51pm on 9th: Yess! I call that "my match", and that's what I'm looking for.

DECORATRESS 2 12.36am on 10th: ROFLMBO. Funniest thing I've seen on a blog yet. And so drolly told. Thankyou for lighting my smile!

GYPSYNURSE @ 6.10PM ON 4TH:
"SHYBUTPERKY" What was/is/will be?

ABCKENNY again @ 9.42pm on 8th. Please do not under-estimate me sir - FirstDate # 68 was about last March, not now, and I don't count love-ins or other group activities - only one on one actual first dates.

I'm 2 States away from my scoreboard this weekend, but I think the one who invited my email today will probably be about FD#105 by next weekend.

Posted by: timewarp1 at February 10, 2008 6:46 PM

Slightsync...I think the trick is to try not to take the negative stuff personally. This can be hard because sometimes it is meant personally. People are judgemental and seem to become more so as they get older. They become self-righteous and stuck in their old fashioned, discriminatory thinking and ways.
Take pity on them as they can't be very happy criticising others the whole time.
ODG, I enjoy your dating posts...and sometimes enjoy the repartee too, when it is clever...and positive...I guess it would depend on a few things whether you would go into the apartment of a naked man...I hope not on the first meeting.
Woodnwine, I think it opens up a whole can of worms finding out too much about people's sexual history. It can be a real turn-off to me. However, many men feel compelled to fill you in as though it is raising their prowess in your eyes. For me it doesn't.
Pixie, it doesn't matter one iota whether you can see a profile or not. It could be totally fake anyway. This is a blog and it is the words that you should be reacting to, not a false perception that is a profile. You don't really know a person till you meet them face to face. Most blogs are faceless...doesn't make any difference unless they are attacking someone's profile or looks. Then it is below the belt.

Posted by: istj54 at February 10, 2008 6:34 PM

SSc hi girl where have you been, i can post for you but it will be only my version of Thai style, you still want i will give.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 6:12 PM

Lynath we are talking modern French Cuisine here in which i trained. I praise you for "googling" the term ,try Books by Escoffier, or Larousse Gastronomique.
The term i used ,"Fonds Brun " actually is the stock,Brown stock, i didn't mean to confuse you.
Espagnole is the basic sauce.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 6:09 PM

To whoever may like to know...for organisational reasons am putting my profile on not visible till Feb 14th. Just need a rest.

Posted by: slightsynchronicity at February 10, 2008 6:02 PM

Motorbikes mmmmmmmmmmmmm and accents, thelynathdiary. Wow I am so mature...I love accents. Hey MMFU...can u post a Thai stirfry recipe one day?

Bloggers, its so much fun on here...apart from the occasional bitching session and the antagonists as well! Although I love this blog, there is a bit too much negativity on here (judgment too) and I feel that to concentrate on my two jobs properly and make some headway in my drought affected garden and catch up with a few friends before uni I will have a break until Valentines Day where I will just have to pop in and see how things are on the blog. Hope someone posts some recipes too. Have a nice virtual dinner whoever goes to it. Oh and this could be the wrong blog for this comment but if a guy had a one night stand or two in his 20s or any age....or a woman had a one night stand or several when younger and for who knows what reason...pissed maybe? They are supposed to divulge things from over 20 years ago and be judged on them? I really do not care what someone has done in the past as long as they are not a player and do not give me an STD. Or a liar actually and arrogance also is hard to bear.

I am not perfect and just hope to meet someone normal who is happy to be with me and not wishing they were with a 20 year old.

Personally I hope to meet someone who lives now and is not overly bothered with their or my past and also not too concerned about the future but can enjoy the present moment. I will "lurk" and read this blog but I do not feel that I can participate constructively at the moment. Is anyone else tired of a few blog posters continually making comments about largish people? Reminds me of the playground at school and I think I (we) should move past that. Beauty fades and our bodies give in to gravity unless we are exceptional and really lucky in our genes. Some people are fat but they can exercise and diet. The continual slagging off of fat people is discriminatory as some have a medical condition. It is so immature to focus on outward standards of body image created by the media and the stick like models we have to see, who look starved. Also I see negative comments about women over 40. Once again...we are fine...you have the problem if you have to go on disparagingly about women over 40 who are often sexy, smart, resiliant...have our own houses (not that that matters). To the ones clinging onto past hurt and lashing out to others...try to get over it. Or have a break and do some gardening or paint a room in your house. You know theres something you could do...if you look around. (have my whole backyard to re
do!!!)

Seeyou bloggers on the 14th Feb...after work. Hopefully the blog will be clear as YOU WILL BE ALL OUT ON DATES....OR SOMETHING.

Have fun and be kind to one another.

and yummmmmm gravy!! About time more was written about recipes. Will attempt to keep up to date by reading the blog. Hey mstingle all the best at uni this semester...hope all is fine : ))

Posted by: slightsynchronicity at February 10, 2008 6:00 PM

Moreofaman I googled origins of gravy and found this...so it seems to me that once again it is the english v the french

The origins of gravy go back to the 18th century, when English and French chefs engaged in a contest every bit as hard-fought as the two nations' current footballing rivalry. The French (naturally) kicked things off, by inventing myriad complicated sauces. This might not have mattered, except that 18th-century English aristocrats took to aping the styles of their French counterparts. To this end, French chefs became a fixture in English stately homes, along with French dancing masters and French tailors. Not surprisingly, this soon provoked a patriotic backlash, with writers such as Joseph Addison and Richard Steele denouncing the Gallic invasion.

In culinary terms, what English writers objected to most was the high costs involved in preparing the quintessences, or stock-based preparations, that had become the foundation of French cooking. Quintessences took hours to prepare, and were very expensive. In the eyes of patriotic English cooks, they were an unforgivable extravagance. In her 1747 work The Art of Cookery Made Plain and Easy, Hannah Glasse famously wrote: "If a gentleman will have French chefs, then they must pay for French tricks . . . I have heard of a Cook that used six pounds of butter to fry twelve eggs, when every Body knows, that understand cooking, that Half a Pound is full enough."

The alternative to quintessences proposed by English cooks was plain old gravy. In the 18th century, the highest praise a chef could receive was to be complimented on the simplicity of the gravy, just as the greatest insult was to be accused of an unpatriotic reliance on French sauces.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 5:55 PM

ODGS you know you are always welcome, but why have you got your panties in such a twist today

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 5:53 PM

There are some bloggers who no doubt generally enjoy reading dating advice on a dating site. This site could be fun and entertaining, but there is always someone who tries to rain on the parade and spoil it for others, and it seems to be people that have short mundane conversations that they think are humourous when no one else does.

I laughed when you told me you wouldnt like to share the same food as your date, or would leave if he tried to touch you..but how about if a man answered the door to his inner city CBD apartment naked-bet you would go in.

I am also well aware of copyright laws. I am also savvy to the fact that it is not in ones best interest to try and contribute to a blog such as this, when you are not wanted.

If unhumourous banter is what you want..fine.........................ODG

Posted by: onlinedatinggoddess at February 10, 2008 5:49 PM

Awwwww, please Mum, can't we talk about something new now....... I have so many opinions to give to the world and of course everyone will want to absorb them, to grow and enlighten themselves.
*she says with tongue firmly placed within cheek"
I just wanted to get a word in...... hehe

Posted by: mystiemuse at February 10, 2008 5:49 PM

fonds brun recipe please?

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 5:43 PM

Lynath, in cookery, there is no such thing as "gravy" everything is a sauce. Pan juices are called jus or jus lie then they are thickened with a brown roux. To keep lumps out you keep stirring till returns to the boil, then reduce to a simmer, check seasoning. then and only then can you add other items.
ps simmer has to be at least 20 mins

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 5:43 PM

come again?

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 5:36 PM

lynth you have just made Demi glaze, sorry you didn't make fonds brun.
istj54 yes they do like a expresso and you do get to take potti break when your on the road, all you have to do is chose your tree or bush, they even have the seat down for the girls.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 5:26 PM

Do they provide free tea and biscuits and appropriate rest breaks? If so, I'm in...MoaM4u
NF...it's called a nana nap down here...Yuppies call it a Power nap, more power to them.

Posted by: istj54 at February 10, 2008 5:18 PM

moreofaman I thought that was a trick question and you weere using slang for bike terms or something.
My fonds brun
pan drippings from roasted meat skimmed of fat. sprinkle with some plain flour and brown over heat. add water gradually and stir until boiling ..reduce heat to simmer and stir until smooth and desired thickness or sieve if lumpy! Add some salt and pepper and red wine or whatever suits the meat if liked. A good slug of mint sauce works wonders with a lamb roast! Yours?

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 5:18 PM

isitj54 is old Willie still around, maybe join Ulysses Bike club, sure they would welcome you girl, top bunch of blokes and girls

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 5:12 PM

Lynath.

Say these words after me.

“Wham Bam Thank You Ma’am.”

Took 1 sec didn’t it.

LOL

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 10, 2008 5:12 PM

You can,
and no one will ever know.

It is much kinder to let people exist in their own reality. Validation Therapy I believe it is called.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 5:07 PM

lynth,roflmao correct on the harley and correct on the cookery terms, now can I give You the recipe for ,"Fonds Brun"knowing the term for brown sauce is commonly known as ,gravy.
By all means do check my profile, lolol now what recipe can i get you.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 5:02 PM

Lynath Dearest.

Back in the Army we only had to do 100 push ups.

Then in footie most of us front rowers/ruckmen/front row forward types collapsed after 20 anyway and claimed privilege.

Why can’t we claim privilege in our later years?

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 10, 2008 4:59 PM

I get it now. NF is talking about the Harley. Careful when you fall asleep after six hours on the road...could be messy...Rest and Respite stops provide a nice cup of tea and a biscuit to share...then, it's "On the Road again...like a band of gypsies we go down the highway..."Willy Nelson...whatever year:))

Posted by: istj54 at February 10, 2008 4:59 PM

Jovial.

Don’t mix prescription drugs in a cocktail.

You can’t mix the pink stuff and antis.

Look what happened to Heath Ledger

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 10, 2008 4:56 PM

neurotic fish
Rule 10.1 a If you don't strike oil, stop boring.

works on so many levels.....

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 4:55 PM

so that makes 3 breaks in a six hr shift,,,,no wonder you get nothing done NF, try doing some more work ,the rewards are worth the extra effort.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 4:54 PM

love the sound of a Harley at full throttle..it means it will be far away as soon as possible....

I think I can see why you are having communication difficulty moreofa man...you speak French!

Do you want the recipe for gravy or is that some kind of oil or petrol or something for the rice burner?(presuming that is also some sort of machine)

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 4:52 PM

Union Rules you know.

Entertainment and Allied Trades Union

Rule 10.1

“If her motor ain’t purring after 6 hours, you may conclude shift and clock off and go home.

Meal breaks after every 2 hours.”

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 10, 2008 4:46 PM

Sorry folks have to jet, will answer your question when I get back on later neuroticfish, perhaps I read your statement incorrect.... :-)

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 4:45 PM

Neurotic fish I feel your observation about women pinching food from partners plates is a good one. I think if I were a man I would find this habit absolutely infuriating.
If a man encourages dessert eating he is a good man! If he makes no comments about the size or kilojoule content of the dessert, nor raises his eyebrows
accusingly and does not slap my bum in a 'has it gotten bigger" kind of way when we stand up, then he is perfect!

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 4:44 PM

NF, if anyone can go for six hours without falling asleep, they deserve a medal... or perhaps a sedative.

Posted by: jovial67 at February 10, 2008 4:43 PM

lynth i think also men tend to think on a different level. Example, do you like the sound of a "harley at full throttle" or know the difference between a harley or a rice burner(jappa).Maybe what is the difference between ,julienne or jardinere or for that fact pasienne.Try this one the word ,"gravy" what is it, pls be careful here, how do you make it without lolol gravoux,(Yuk)?

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 4:43 PM

And, pray tell, what is so bitter and twisted about my saying that if it’s going to take longer than 6 hours, I have a tendency to fall asleep on the job.

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 10, 2008 4:37 PM

yes, neurotic fish..as the pregnant girl was told
" You should never take seriously anything poked at you in jest"

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 4:30 PM

hehehe love that sense of humour moreofaman4u. As for neuroticfish - read a few blogs on my short time on here and all the ones from you seem to be basically the same. For god's sake man, get a grip on reality here. You sound so bitter and twisted, the girl who did this to you has alot to answer for!!

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 4:29 PM

No not joking...they were very honest ones with a conscience.
I am sure many people have this happen. I mean how many people love "Shawshank" and walking on the moonlit beach or lying on a bearskin/flokati rug swilling red wine if the weather turns cold....
and great minds must have been thinking alike with the heading
"I am looking for a friend, a lover a golf partner and a live in cook/housekeeper and would like them all to be the one person"
the original profilers who wrote those words must be VERY annoyed!

Once I saw my profile almost in it's entirety(is that a real word) on another dating site...pinched by a man with just a few changes to take out the feminine bits(so to speak...)
Anyway mine is just a profile on a public internet site so open season, but credit should not be taken for works by professional writers who need to make a living selling their ideas and intellectual property.

Lot's of people have trouble communicating with people in general not just the opposite sex.
Putting up a profile that does not really reflect who you are as a person is not going to help futher down the track.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 4:25 PM

moreofaman4u

I agree that men in general don't communicate to the same depth as many women and I find this disappointing. I tend to have much more in-depth conversations with women than men.

Posted by: jovial67 at February 10, 2008 4:21 PM

Talk about feeding someone.

I watched in amazement as this Greek pair (he in his fifties, bald and uninviting, she is her thirties and grossly overweight) indulged in just this at a party in full view of everyone.

She sat there yabbering away. He had a fork and alternated between feeding her (like a groper fish) and then himself from both his plate and hers.

It went on for an hour. Hope they don’t do it at restaurants. Even Greek restaurants.

There is a difference between that and she deciding that her order at a restaurant was not as tasty or inviting as his, and merrily helping herself to his plate. A gentleman usually ends up offering her his whole plateful, and she refusing, as she suddenly remembers that she may have to diet after, but still continuing to pick at his plate. That is byplay not foreplay. Ain’t love grand.

AS for tickling, nothing kills foreplay more than illtimed frivolity. Maybe if you have no great objective in mind, but not if you want to get to Point A sometime in the next 12 – 24 hours. Tactility is a different matter.

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 10, 2008 4:17 PM

yes your right s0 68, just hope she has nipple rings to like me ,roflmao

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 4:15 PM

thanks for the just kidding comment... my reply was going to be "I think I'd change sides before I'd wait that long!" teehee

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 4:07 PM

lynth you have to be joking when you say guys have asked to use your verse. I agree with what you have said all the way but i think the truth be is men in general have trouble communicating with the opposite sex. They feel they will be classed as wimps, because they have this trouble. i to have changed and will continue to change my profile, but it will be my own words, as if i were talking with a lady face to face. Men are scared of women.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 4:06 PM

just kidding!
I am sure your email will arrive next week.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 4:06 PM

sophisticated68..yes you need patience...I was your age when I started here....

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 4:03 PM

moreofaman4u - You have a lovely cheeky sense of humour, have heart us girls love that in a man! Keep smiling she's out there somewhere.... just as my man must be out there somewhere too.... right?!

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 4:02 PM

s0 68 lol gr8 girl same here from me girl seeing your Safely in Brissy we could make our own fireworks, nudge nudge wink wink , you have put a smile on my dial to, I don't feel so down now thx you;))

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 3:58 PM

moreofaman4u - I nam humbly honoured by your lovely comments, you've made me grin ear to ear... Shame you're not in Brisbane! :-) All the best!

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 3:51 PM

so 68 if he is a really nice guy and he really wants to meet with you, your patience will be well rewarded.Seen your profile, he would be mad not to make contact with you girl,you go girl.
kisses an hugg's to you

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 3:45 PM

kenny lolol but i know a few females with the name "butch". But honestly think does my name sound like a female name? or even yours for that fact, no. To be honest kenny, you remind me of the guy who had that movie on porta loo"s, sorry mate.

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 3:40 PM

thelynathdiary - thanks for your comments... can you tell I'm a Capricorn then...? I'm trying to learn patience really I am... >:-)

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 3:38 PM

sometimes it is hard to know from a profile name if someone is male or female and I have been guilty of mistakenly looking but I have yet to met a girl named Kenny

Posted by: abckenny at February 10, 2008 3:34 PM

sophisticated68...if he sent that on Friday then be patient, girl! If he purchased by bpay or credit card then the transaction would not be processed for a couple of days (it states that on the stamp purchase page too)
If you have had no contact by the end of this week then you can fairly safely assume it is not coming.

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 3:32 PM

abc kenny i have to admit when a male views my profile i tend to get a tad worried. I like a good party, but wouldn't say have a gay old time:))

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 3:30 PM

picklessister when you get the reply back saying they have responded to someone else. i have to ask, have they really or not, but then you still see them pop up on the members who are still seeking. Confusing isn't it? sugar coated no thxs me thinks.
So what happens if they contact you with a kiss, asking for more contact?
Once bitten, twice shy!

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 3:27 PM

moreofaman4you - thanks for your comments, I am starting to get the gist of this RSVP (I think) I say good luck to all of us. Perhaps we may all meet that special "someone", only time will tell I guess....

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 3:25 PM

sophisticated68, it would be nice to think that when a contact who sent you a kiss stated they were buying stamps to further the connection were being truthful. But this being RSVP i would not hold my breath or prayers. People do window shop, then decide they may have made a mistake and want no further contact, hard , but the truth. I have sent out about 45 kisses, 20 have replyed with a thxs but omg you have to be jk(lolol, my words not theres). The other 25 i feel , look at you as much to say ,you want to talk with me, your not good enough for me. Harsh but it is the world, and we are the weak!

Posted by: moreofaman4u at February 10, 2008 3:20 PM

Ok, here's one for you all... does receiving a kiss on Friday night that says "am purchasing stamps and will send you an email" and then you don't get a reply - does that mean they're just taking their time, or that they genuinely are going to buy stamps just haven't yet? Obviously I won't send another kiss, I don't want to appear like a stalker! teehee

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 2:57 PM

Woodnwine.couldn't stop laughing and am still giggling when you attempted to ask in a serious tone (you know the one..for research purposes only) "Should we also ask them what they did with these men?"

I am positive that doing just that is a serious fantasy of many, many men.....

Posted by: woodnwine at February 10, 2008 10:57 AM

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 2:56 PM

Hmmm..i might give a double dose of rejection a miss..thanks y'all!

Posted by: picklessister at February 10, 2008 2:52 PM

picklesister..usually it means a kind version of 'no' but on the other hand there is nothing to be lost by trying again. The worst thing that can happen is another refusal, but there is always a possiblity that you might find a happy outcome!

Posted by: thelynathdiary at February 10, 2008 2:45 PM

picklesister - I for one like the "recently responded to someone else" response, it is certainly a nice let down...

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 10, 2008 2:44 PM

A question for you all...if you kissed someone some months ago and they said "recently responded to someone else", is it ok to kiss them again or should you assume that the first response was a sugar coated version of not interested??

Posted by: picklessister at February 10, 2008 2:35 PM

pixiemagic - I think if you engage in interesting rather than confrontational discussions with someone on the blogs, you can get a good feeling for what they are like and you don't need to see a profile. Decoratress is a real person that many of us have met ... you should only be worried about some of the suspicious people that no one has ever met and may in fact be fakes. Decoratress is definitely not fake.

Posted by: woodnwine at February 10, 2008 2:06 PM

onlinedatinggoddess ..sorry did not mean to offend you

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 10, 2008 1:15 PM

Constructive criticism noted..will edit in future to more bullet form posts.................................ODG

Posted by: onlinedatinggoddess at February 10, 2008 1:05 PM

similarly, on the other hand if I got the feeling that a person has had many relationships, particularly over the last year or so, I would wonder how long she might be thinking of staying with me?

Posted by: virgil at February 10, 2008 12:06 PM

I am sure I would never ask a woman how many sexual partners she had, the answers that would be helpful in that context would come from general discussion possibly when they finished their last relationship. I feel that is an entirely valid question, as if someone said they came out of a 20year marriage last month, that would encourage me to think that person hasnt entirely processed everything, and was most likely not in a good position to start a new relationship.

Posted by: virgil at February 10, 2008 12:03 PM

Hi Woodwine
Rather than ask the question how many. Try what is your sexual prefference and then proceed very slowly to obey. That should answer any question you could ever ask.
cheers.

Posted by: oldergent at February 10, 2008 11:43 AM

ODG posted 10/2/08. 8.08 am
A very good dissertation and profound in its message. If ever I get to a first date I will be sure to remember it. The problem I seem to be having is that I can get to a second day chat with a person ( and I have recently met a very nice person, ufortunately younger than myself) but that is where the chats were asked to be discontinued. I am not aware that I was discourteous, or too pushey (how would I know anyway) so your advice would be appreciated on the correct procedure for the initial chats. As to the subject of what my offspring think of me being on RSVP, they never consulted their parents about their choice of spouse to be, so I retain the same right not to consult them. It also raises the point, at what point of life do they gain wisdom, I suspect that it is at the same time they decide we are senile or anile.
Cheers from the oldergent.

Posted by: oldergent at February 10, 2008 11:25 AM

woodnwine...totally agree. I dont want to know how many partners you have had in the past..When I date someone ..apart from enjoying your company I'm more concerned with the safe sex aspect should it go that far

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 10, 2008 11:05 AM

Just exploring this a bit further, there are surely many variables. Some people may prefer a partner with a bit of experience, some may not. Some may not wish to tell the truth for fear of embarassement (too few or too many .... what after all is the "ideal" number?) I just find it hard to imaging starting dating someone and asking "by the way, how many men have you had sex with?" Should we also ask them what they did with these men?

Posted by: woodnwine at February 10, 2008 10:57 AM

This is a bit of a late reply but I rarely read the blogs on the weekend. Many people, including jenjen and wishful have been discussing their preferences for people who haven't had too many past sexual partners. Do people really ask this? When they are starting to date .... or ever? I don't think I have ever asked anyone this and don't think I would. Is it any of my business? Sexual health is something that needs to be checked before you stop having "safe" sex but beyond that?

Posted by: woodnwine at February 10, 2008 10:53 AM

GTTC - looks like that port was loosening up your tongue a little..maybe we need to cut straight to the port and forget the coffee???

Are you sure you aren't part kiwi with stats like those??

Posted by: picklessister at February 10, 2008 9:16 AM

Blueeyes...I think we would begin to find our own dates pretty quickly when face with a lineup of friends' and family's choices for us:)

ODG...I never get nervous on the first date but the second does hold more expectation, but I really would get nervous if he started to feed me and tickle me...I'm thinking date four or five for that...not that it has ever happened...and I am very ticklish...could be embarrassing when I squeal loudly in a restaurant.
I like the afternoon idea though...lunch then market/shopping/beach/park. That is a good one. You learn a lot about a person when walking along with them and get more of a feel of being with them than opposite to them in a restaurant. You find out about their tastes more easily and whether you feel comfortable just being with them...a good one goddess!

Posted by: istj54 at February 10, 2008 9:11 AM

Slightsyncrocity...I didn't even think abot dating again till my son was twenty-one...in his teens he would not have handled it at all well...boys do not like their mum's dating...he thinks rsvp funny now and laughs when he sees I've used his computer...I haven't got past many first dates yet either and so he still hasn't met anyone, nor me...Decoratress, perhaps we all need to buy a pet monkey to help in our choices...that was funny...I'm always suss when my dog dislikes someone too.

Posted by: istj54 at February 10, 2008 8:52 AM

And if your family and/or friends think internet dating is no-go then suggest they line up the dates. That should make for interesting Saturday night evenings. I know I wouldn't like what my father might think suitable.It would go along the lines of-militant dominating man who thinks women are stupid and inferior and only belong in 2 rooms of the house.Not for this little chook.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 10, 2008 8:45 AM

I'm sure my kids would much rather me date through the internet where I can find out a little about the person first before meeting them rather than hang in the local pubs with a sign around my neck saying 'available'.Even if you attend regular social functions or lessons, you want to be careful that you don't earn the reputation of "working one's way through the guys' till you find Mr Right. I know a few people who have found ideal partners on these sites.
As to ages, there is a fellow on this site whom I met for coffee a long time ago. Amazingly he has been 47 for nearly 2 years.I wish I could hold my age like that.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 10, 2008 8:08 AM

I like olives stuffed with chillies, but couldnt eat them by themself.
To be unpredictable for me, means that I sometimes do things spontaneously without thinking.

In fact, it could be a spiritual thing in a way, not thinking. The results are often way better than they would be sometimes if I had thought the things through systematically, weighing the fors and againsts for a particular course of action.

Posted by: virgil at February 10, 2008 1:06 AM

Obviously, I misunderstood the monkey.

Posted by: decoratress at February 10, 2008 12:36 AM

Love it, decoratress, so funny. Jen and Virgil I did not need the chokky anway and have been eating chillies instead : ))

and
Posted by: virgil at February 10, 2008 12:49 AM

I think my boys try not to think about what if I met someone. Yes they do think they know best. People who know me often can predict what I would say. Being unpredictable may be a good tactic but it involves thinking, which I do at uni...in real life I like to relax.

Posted by: slightsynchronicity at February 10, 2008 12:57 AM

slightsynch, I think my boys are generally more convinced they hold much more wisdom than my daughter does, especially when telling me what they think I should do. Sometimes it can be perception as well, I have made sure my actions are generally not predictable, so if I was to say I met someone from RSVP, they would not be shocked or judgemental as it would not be entirely out of character.

Posted by: virgil at February 10, 2008 12:49 AM

& truth being stranger than fiction..

.. I met my ex husband in the Greek Islands when my monkey jumped on his lap at the youth hostel & peed on him..

True

.. Obviously, I misunderstood the monkey.

Posted by: decoratress at February 10, 2008 12:36 AM

but have to admit..

.. I'd quite like to be able to tell people I'd met someone after finding their message in a bottle on a remote beach (at sunset)....

Posted by: decoratress at February 10, 2008 12:31 AM

Virgil - Those antihistamines are really knocking you about... ;-)

Becaue you were on those and antibiotics, I suggested that you may have been bitten whilst wrestling snakes... never mind.

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 10, 2008 12:27 AM

I'd have no problems telling anyone I'd met someone on the internet...

...just as I'd have no problems telling anyone I'd met someone at the supermarket... or at a gas station...

Most of us have computers
Most of us do shopping
Most of us buy petrol...

What's the big deal?

Posted by: decoratress at February 10, 2008 12:22 AM

JenJen
When they have moved on to their own places with partners, you will look back with nostalgia on thsi day when they drank all you coke and OJ.
GTTC
The wrestling snakes went over my head I think

Posted by: virgil at February 10, 2008 12:18 AM

greattimestocome. Yes I do agree but RSVP is a learning curve believe me, and I guess it helps many regain confidence to re-enter the dating scene. As for telling the kids, hey guys I have met some online. Personal experrience...I met some one from the USA some years ago and we enjoyed a beautiful relationship for 3 years travelling back and forwards until distance killed it for her because the question was how either one can abandon even adult siblings if only for a short time which we had planned living together between the USA and OZ 6 months in each country at a time. My kids grew to love my partner and were shell shocked when their father was dumped and if I meet some one who I feel I could love again any time soon I think it would take my kids a hell of a long time to trust any partner I introduced them to and probably less trusting of, if I told them we met online again. I believe the best way to meet a mate is publicly and not from infront of a computer screen. Patience is the requirement and not the urgency of it.

Posted by: music4two at February 10, 2008 12:09 AM

Virgil, they dont just pinch the chockies, mine have knocked off 6 litres of coke and OJ i just bought at lunchtime :(

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 10, 2008 12:08 AM

bugger friends and family are they paying for the date ??????

Posted by: jabbathehung at February 6, 2008 9:26 PM

JTH..are they going to live with the person, if it got to that? We have to just live out lives ourselves.

Posted by: slightsynchronicity at February 10, 2008 12:01 AM

One benefit in living here, slight synchronicity, is that no one pinches your chockies, well in a different state to my kids anyway.

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:59 PM

Virgil - Goodness, you been wrestling snakes again?

I thought we'd discussed that. They need to be dead before frying..

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 11:59 PM

well done GTTC
Thats a nice drop

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:56 PM

Unfortunately the red wine is out for me at the moment, as I am on antibiotics and antihystamines, must say the antihystamines are fairly pleasant :)

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:54 PM

Virgil!!

Just demolished a glass (appropriately sized) of Galway Pipe port. Think I'll have another...

Its making me feel all goooey!!

GTTC

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 11:52 PM

Coffee whilst sitting at our computers on a Saturday night, my, how times have changed.
Is anyone out there in blog land enjoying a red wine or two?

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:48 PM

Water at the moment, and a cup of tea soon. Cheers to you if you are having a drop of red. Not with this headache.........I will stick to what I have now. Am going to see if anyone took my ultra dark choccie though.

Posted by: slightsynchronicity at February 9, 2008 11:50 PM

music4two.

Well said. But we're not ALL indulging in mental argument with our ex's....

Some are just mental!!

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 11:48 PM

Posted by: istj54 at February 8, 2008 6:18 PM

Hi istj54...my Mum approves of my being on RSVP.

19 year old daughter thinks it is fine, the 16 and 18 year old boys think it is dangerous and possibly desperate. Also uncool, in their view. Two friends have said that I am absolutely not to ever have anyone not from SA to stay in my house who I could possibly meet from RSVP. They fear it is too dangerous. One friend will probably fall out with me if I do that, based on an experience of hers. So they are fearful for me. The two friends have basically told me that I can't meet the guy from overseas if he comes to Australia, that I have corresponded with for a year. I feel it is not their business. Other friends are curious and some people I know do not use the internet so are wary of it anyway. My boss thinks it is better to go out in person...where else??? and just try harder in real life to meet guys. Co-workers think its fine as they meet people on MySpace who add them as a friend from an existing friend. No idea what the rest of my family would think or other people I know. Really do not mind others views. Would have to cross the bridge when I come to it as all meetings from RSVP so far have been a one off meeting or resulted in a friendship, which is great. RSVP could do more to reduce any supposed "stigma". Maybe by making RSVP more user friendly and harder for people with dubious motives to put up profiles.

Posted by: slightsynchronicity at February 9, 2008 11:48 PM

Coffee whilst sitting at our computers on a Saturday night, my, how times have changed.
Is anyone out there in blog land enjoying a red wine or two?

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:48 PM

BlondeA..i have no stamps and am not sure about playing the game never mind subscribing. However did relate to your comments and liked your face.

Posted by: opheliabanished at February 9, 2008 11:45 PM

Picklessister - you telling me the survey is wrong? Right then, coffee's off!!
;-)

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 11:44 PM

After reading many of the posts on RSVP I can only come to the conclusion that so many of you are still arguing with your ex’s mentally in the way you write and you haven’t finished grieving over past issues yet which is such a shame. In saying this I truly hope airing opinions will help many of you get past pent up emotions of your chests helping you individually to regain trust in your opposite numbers again to share a future life with a caring, loving partner one day when that person just happens to knock on your front door.

Posted by: music4two at February 9, 2008 11:44 PM

Whoops! Addendum to my 3.02pm post - Meant to say 'number is significantly less than HALF my age'..

How embarrassment..

JenJen - were you having a go at me earlier? Glass houses - considering the results of that magnificent survey... :-)

just....looking... for.... Tourism NZ.....

GTTC

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 11:40 PM

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 9, 2008 8:27 AM

LOL

Posted by: slightsynchronicity at February 9, 2008 11:36 PM

I have had a very enjoyable evening watching the crows demolish Collingwood by more than 80 points. I was a bit worried leaving the territory of the West Coast Eagles, but after tonight, I'm sure Adelaide Crows will make us proud to be South Australians this year.

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:33 PM

well JenJen
you know what they say
"lies damn lies & statistics"

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:26 PM

A night of yummy cocktails ending with the making of dangerous mistakes with the man of my dreams while lying in a flower bed of 1000 thornless roses.........sounds pretty good to me wishful :)

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 5, 2008 11:43 PM

Jen and wishful, tried to post this on the mistakes to avoid blog, which is not accepting posts. I would prefer to lay me down on a bed of rose petals. They are just soooooooooooooo nice. Personally I would prefer to be able to remember what happened too! Am sure Jen makes a mean cocktail though : )))

Posted by: slightsynchronicity at February 9, 2008 11:26 PM

Fussy is good Jen...wouldn't want to be any other way :) The survey....well I'm sure it was rigged :)

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 9, 2008 11:20 PM

Yes wishful we are still here (sigh) but a lot of those on the Top 100 have been here for a while also........maybe we are all toooooo fussy :)
And how about that dodgy survey hey !! Very suss if you ask me.

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 11:12 PM

Chrome.....back in the archives there is a huge amount written about how to write a winning profile - and while some of us writers are STILL here, I prefer to think of it as being "fussy" rather than anything else :)

Have a read, it will give you some pretty good ideas of what to include. If you are not really wanting a relationship yet best not tick the "long-term" box....but the vast majority on here are here for that reason. Just tweat your profile here and there, and often, and things should be just fine! Good luck.

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 9, 2008 11:08 PM

Thanks for the compliment Chrome.Writing a profile often takes more than one attempt. Next suggestion is to write more positive things about what you like rather than list lots of things you don't like.I sure you have lots of good qualities you haven't mentioned.Ask a friend's advice on what they think are your best attributes.Keep trying.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 9, 2008 10:57 PM

Hi sue4you - sorry if this appears twice, not sure if it's worked or not... I'm a bit confused... do you mean I should have something like "I can cook for you, mow your lawn for you, get you a cold beer, change the tv channel for you and be at your beck and call whenever you want??"

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 9, 2008 9:29 PM

Piximagic February 9, 2008 10:44 AM
Womans privilege my ass. A lie is nothing more than a lie. You excuse your own personal paranoia, (a fear of age based persecution) with all the intellect of an imbecile. Your contradiction is amazing. You suggest its OK to lie about your age, (but only if you are a woman I presume?) you then switch to inversion mode and suggest that age is just a number. If this is true why the need to lie about it. By the reasoning of your own words, one would have to wonder how you would treat the truth when it comes to important issues if you are prepared to lie about something that doesn�t matter. If age is just a number and it is OK to lie about it, then why do you have an age preference listed in your profile?????...... Lies are absolute, and they are the greatest problem on this site, bar none.

Posted by: rsviper at February 9, 2008 9:07 PM

Notgodsgift (and never will be) Your assumption that all the males who view your profile should be on a Gay site is as ridiculous as anything else you have ever written on here.
Dear Bob, rest easy, you are the perfect example of what a gay man would not be looking for I should imagine, because they like men , not big girls.

Posted by: rsviper at February 9, 2008 9:04 PM

Jen...are we copping a hard time again???

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 9, 2008 9:03 PM

Ok, I have a question. Is there any females on RSVP who actually want a relationship with a genuine guy? Plenty say they want that but I am yet to see it. Any comments on my pessimistic view?

Posted by: guy2love at February 9, 2008 8:49 PM

Yes picklessister, I would like to know just who does these ridiculous surveys, and how DARE they cast aspersions on our (lack of) morality !!
Hehe.........ggggrrrrrrrr

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 8:09 PM

Jenjen..i am a kiwi too and read that about our slapperish ways..i think they got us mixed up with some other nation :)

Posted by: picklessister at February 9, 2008 7:56 PM

On a date virgil ? Lucky you !
And forget 200 sexual partners, I would probably think 20 was a few too many !!
And this from a kiwi girl - according to some recent survey we are the sl..s of the planet :(

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 7:37 PM

High Sophisticated68,
Your profile looks fine, just one lil point. You seem to say a lot about what you want a man to do for you, but little about what you could offer in return. Sorry, my profile is hidden because I am going out with someone but its just a tip someone gave me and it seemed to work.

Posted by: sue4you at February 9, 2008 7:36 PM

hi GTTC

I was out before (on an afternoon date).
You ask the question "Is 200 too many?
Surely the answer is self evident?
Over a period of 20 years, that is 10 per year.
Maybe assume the person had been married, and say they had been married for 6 years. Thats 199 relationships in 14 years (14.2 relationships per year, every year.

Would that not send alarm bells rining, knowing this person gets into a new relationship roughly once every 3 weeks.

So what would be an acceptable number of prior partners?

This I feel would be different for everyone, as for me, I feel an acceptable number of former partners would be roughly equal to the number of former partners I have had.

I feel most people who are honest, might use this as a measuring stick.

This might be used for age, roughly the same as me, financial assets would be possibly assessed the same way.

Who among the bloggers here would not measure the suitability of a future partner to be roughly equal to themselves on the above criteria?

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 6:51 PM

No worries Chrome - all this talk of profile writing made me change my own...sometimes it can be a bit hit and miss..but i wish you luck with yours :)

Posted by: picklessister at February 9, 2008 6:51 PM

Thank blueeyes1955 and PicklesSister for your insight into updating my profile, it was most appreciated. I wish I had half the writing skills you have both exhibited in creating an engaging profile.
Cheers,
Chrome.

Posted by: chrome79 at February 9, 2008 6:20 PM

I had hoped Mystiemuse's question would have been seen as rhetorical o_O

Posted by: dharma61 at February 9, 2008 6:14 PM

Mystic Muesli

Why am I on this site?

Well it’s a long story.

It seemed like a good idea at the time.

Every so often I ask one of my favourites “Do you want to do anything? I mean ANYTHING. Like go out?”

To which I usually get a “You mean this year Fishy. I thought you meant sometime in the next 5 years.”

Or:

“Are you going to marry me first and make me an honest woman. I only go out with men who are relationship material. Where’s the ring.”

So, in view of the absence of a mere dating site in Australia, and a complete lack of a culture of simply dating and enjoying each other’s company, without turning it into a relationship meat market, I just wander around aimlessly, indulging my many neurosis, which I wallow in endlessly like comfort blankets.

It will probably be time in the next 3 months to ask SugarBabe whether she wants to go overseas next year, or the year after, or sometimes before she turns 60.

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 9, 2008 5:57 PM

origami1107 - I am hearing you there, I think that's a number one reason why I've been single for a few years now....! I've worked hard to get where I am, no-one is taking that away from me..

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 9, 2008 3:36 PM

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 9, 2008 3:10 PM
origami1107 "could it be us independent women are outnumbering the guys on here....?"

I seem to attract the guys that want to become "dependent upon" MY income, home, lifestyle etc.

Posted by: origami1107 at February 9, 2008 3:34 PM

Pixie,

We haff our vays of finding out dees tings.

She vill be pinned to de bed until she confesses

Achtung Ж

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 9, 2008 3:30 PM

NeuroticFish, I have read and reread your posts. Why on earth are you on this site? You seem to be soo angry with women! You need to accept that everyone is different and that just because your opinions of behaviour are what you consider to be right does not mean that they are for everyone. Of course you are entitled to your opinion, but I think what you should be doing is spending more time getting to the root of your "evil" rather than constantly saying everything is a womans fault. I have been hurt many times, and very deeply but I do not paint every man I meet with the same brush that was left over from the last one. We are all individuals no matter what the gender and should be treated as such. No one will ever be good enough if you have judged them before you have even gotten to know them. Or take one piece of them and decide that that is who they are. You really need to destress, or you will end up with an ulcer or worse...if you haven't got one already.
I know you will probably hit me with some tirade about me not knowing anything and blah blah blah...but listening to someone looking in can sometimes help....... :-D

Posted by: mystiemuse at February 9, 2008 3:20 PM

wishfulthinker03 - thanks for the tip - have put some in... :-)

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 9, 2008 3:17 PM

Sophisticated68 -I took a peak at your profile - the only suggestion I'd make is insert a couple of paragraph breaks so it makes it easier to read. Just a thought....

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 9, 2008 3:14 PM

Thanks GTTC. And its nice to hear about that score thingy :) And that you are not a piece of vermin like my ex. Because that sort of behaviour really is a bit festy in my books.
I know there are lots of good decent and honest men out there, and I have even met a few here !!

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 3:12 PM

origami1107 could it be us independent women are outnumbering the guys on here....? I'd be very disappointed to learn that being a professionally employed, financially secure women who is divorced with children was seen as a "bad point" or even a "threat" to some males on here... Sorry if that sounds too harsh.....

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 9, 2008 3:10 PM

Thanks, by the way, to those who have had a look at my profile, and to those who sent kisses. I assume you were just being inquisitive, as you were all from other states, and same sex?

Who is somelifeinmeyet? Not a name I have seen.

Posted by: origami1107 at February 9, 2008 3:09 PM

"What can I say? I joined RSVP Tuesday of this week. So far I'm not that impressed"
Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 9, 2008 2:47 PM

Glad to see I'm not the only one!

Posted by: origami1107 at February 9, 2008 3:07 PM

All,

I'm a bit disappointed - I thought my remark about 200 partners would elicit some outrage!!

and before you think thats my score (which I did intend to have happen for a moment... hee hee), its not! I haven't kept score but I know my number is significantly less than my age. (I was married - faithfully - for nearly 13 years).

Apologies for sharing so much..

JENJEN, Very sorry to read you're situation. Yes there are men out there who won't grow-up and need the chase, however there are many more of us who don't. Good luck.

GTTC

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 3:02 PM

Many thanks picklesister and GTTC, perhaps it's the Capricorn in me.... I want things and I want them now... I'll learn patience one day... or will I....? >:-)

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 9, 2008 3:00 PM

GTTC..we think a lot alike..maybe we should meet for coffee some time ;)

Posted by: picklessister at February 9, 2008 2:59 PM

Sophisticated68..i dont see anything wrong with your profile..we have a lot in common! :)

Give it time....and then when you are really fed up..give it some more time...

Posted by: picklessister at February 9, 2008 2:57 PM

High Sophisticated68,

You asked....

Nothing wrong with your profile - leaving the 'you should be' stats empty is a good idea. Perhaps remove a little of what you want in your 'About you' section - just to appear a little more relaxed...

Apart from that suggestion, nice to read.

You're right, you don't need to apologise, but you don't need to to reaffirm that either.

Keep at it, it takes quite some time (particularly with a head like mine ;-)
you'll find someone or they'll find you. Good luck!!

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 2:57 PM

Chrome - i am by no means the profile expert but i think you need to get rid of the comments where you say "i am not really looking" or words to that effect. My reaction would be if you arent looking why are you here? Maybe soften it a bit, and change your "relationship sought" to short term and not long term - if thats what you mean by not wanting anyone too serious.

Jen and Wishfulthinker - i agree to a certain extent "high scores" are a bit of a red rag. But I am a bit of a here and now person, and if i had formed a connection with a genuine person it wouldnt matter how many partners they have had...naive??

Posted by: picklessister at February 9, 2008 2:52 PM

What can I say? I joined RSVP Tuesday of this week. So far I'm not that impressed. I'll ask for others opinions here... Please read my profile and tell me if there is anything that scares men off? I will not apologise for being married before, not my fault my ex cheated on me, I will not take that from any man, thus we got divorced. As for having children- I won't apologise for that either, they are the light of my life, my reason for existing. As for having a good job and all the other good things I have - I won't apologise for that either. I know what I want, I've worked hard to get where I am, and I'd just like the chance to share my future with a partner. I'll give this RSVP another week or so, then perhaps I'll got back to chance, and see what the future holds trying to meet guys the old fashioned way.....

Posted by: sophisticated68 at February 9, 2008 2:47 PM

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 5:50 AM

and
"All I have a problem with, is being lied to."

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:23 AM

EXACTLY!

Posted by: origami1107 at February 9, 2008 2:43 PM

I'm with you Jen on the excessive number of partners. It is usually a good indicator that commitment is an issue or the thrill of the chase is still a big draw card. Perhaps it's not an issue if you are just looking for a fling here and there but for someone you think you may settle down with it's like waving a red rag to a bull for me. I don't want to be no.54 in an ever growing list. I have met a couple who are so proud of their "high score" I'm wondering if they are living in the real world or playing some reality game!

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 9, 2008 2:41 PM

Picklessister, thanks for the compliment.

ISTJ, Good to see you're agreeable agaiin.. ;-)

Virgil, Lets talk tacks now. Is 200 too many?

Where is the line?

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 2:34 PM

HI Chrome,
you asked for some advice on your profile. Am old enough to be your mum so take the advice as you see it. Get rid of the video games. Don't think that many young women want to spend their evenings playing that game.It's not a date I would look forward to.
Keep trying.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 9, 2008 1:48 PM

NF...some people will not fill you in on all their past baggage or will only tell you what they want so how will you know or even be able to make a decision?..sounds like you are a wounded bull!

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 9, 2008 1:44 PM

haha istj l live near the beach and pretend the noise is the freeway... or the Nepean highway which is closer.....and l simply must have milk in my coffee it is a prerequesite for me so next time make sure you have some okay????

By the way did you have any chocolate biscuits?????.......K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 9, 2008 1:35 PM

Sexual history is not baggage.

It is a highly relevant precursor and predictor of how a woman might act in future.

It is highly relevant to a man’s decision as to how and what to commit.

Only a fool would marry a woman with an extensive sexual history, and likewise any man who exposes his assets to a defacto (2 years living together) with an extensive sexual history, has only himself to blame when, predictably, she continues to act like she has in the past, and cleans him and his self respect and self esteem out.

Leopards do not change their spots. A woman who has been unfaithful to one man, has had numerous one night stands, multiple boyfriends, sordid little affairs on the side etc is highly likely to continue that behaviour. Any man who thinks he can change that is a fool.

They don’t make pre nups for nothing and the red flags for pre nups are a woman who has slept around extensively, been married more than once or has had several de facto relationships.

Men are quite happy to sleep with S…., but only a fool would marry one.

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 9, 2008 1:32 PM

I tried posting my first post yesterday but it has been sucked into the internet ether. How long does it take for the site owner to approve?

Anyway, I can't see the sense in lying to anyone about where you met your partner. If you're trying to spare their feelings and stop them from worring, do you realy value their ability to handle such a simple truth so badly? Or if it's to avoid your own embarresment, why do you care so deeply about what others think of you especially those that may enjoy making you feel uncomfortable about the way you date? I imagine most people close to you wopuld be happy your with someone.
Anyway I wouldn't listen to me...RSVP has yet to offer me a single chance to test out the above ideas, just pure conjecture.
Maybe I need feedback on my profile or somthing, sigh.

Posted by: chrome79 at February 9, 2008 1:30 PM

Ok Jenjen...understand where you're coming from and hadnt thought of it from that angle but its a good point to note

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 9, 2008 1:07 PM

Great question, I havent told my family about my quest for a partner, as I know what the reaction will be, mum you havent gone online!!!! So, I am being very secretive until the right man comes along, and will just wing it from there

Posted by: leolass2 at February 9, 2008 1:01 PM

Pixie........maybe it shouldnt make a difference, and with some people it wouldnt, but for me, well that is part of my "bagggage" I guess.
Unfortunately I married a man 22 years ago who had an extensive list of past partners, and as it turned out, this was because he just couldnt resist the "thrill and excitement of someone new" as he put it.
And he couldnt resist, even after we were married.
So for me, a long list of previous partners is now a red flag I'm afraid.
Maybe it shouldnt be, but it just is.

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 12:52 PM

JenJen..totally agree with how our past baggage/experience shapes who we are today and that is meant to spur us forward to be better people who have learnt by their mistakes and not make the same ones again. Again...what difference does it make how many partners your new potential partner has had...you cant change that and if you really like him..what difference does it make?. We have alll done things in our life that we would probably never do again but hey...we did them and cant change that...so what?...we just dont do them again.

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 9, 2008 12:26 PM

Kettle's on...but, alas, no milk...we must drink it black.

Kaz, it is easy for me to get to MP or thereabouts...I live near the freeway:))
I can hear it now. I pretend sometimes that itb is the ocean. It does sound the same.

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 12:23 PM

Okay istj...pop the kettle on l will do the same and we will have a virtual coffee together.... now do you have milk and sugar????
I prefer mine with milk, no sugar and relatively strong.....And we will have that drink one day....Im sure l can get your email address from a mutual contact.... I dont get into the city often living here on the MP, but when l next do we will try to organise something........K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 9, 2008 12:11 PM

Virgil

I see what you are saying, but how do you ascertain if they are lying?

From my own personal experience with RSVP, I either have an affinity and mutual attraction with the person on meeting them in the flesh or I dont.

Simple as that. Portrayal of a dating profile comes down to how the individual sees and chooses to portray themselves.

In my own case, when I meet someone for the first time through RSVP, I try not to have too many preconceived ideas regarding how their profile lives up to my expectations of that person, because it is my own projection that I have created in my own mind from a lifetime of experiences.

To me it is a cool way of meeting guys, but I make my impressions of them on the first meeting.

Too many on this site APPEAR to put the blame on inaccurate & deceitful profiles blah...blah...blah...

But it is about perception And is yours or any one elses perception correct??? Who can say??

Pixiemagic-so true-Go girl!!!
Istj54; you are hilarious- so perceptive
Auntykaz- I stll remember your smiling face and kindness..hope we eventually meet again for that drink we were going to organise with istj54, yourself and moi!

Posted by: femalepersuasion at February 9, 2008 12:08 PM

Pixiemagic l agree, l guess the age thing is all part of that wonderful word used to describe our life.....baggage....don't you love that word???
Conjures up so many negative and bad images about us when all it really means is life experience.. How you choose to deal with that is the key in my opinion .
Maybe those among us prefer to use the term baggage if they havent quite got over theirs.

I for one would rather refer to it as just my life to date and get on with things................K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 9, 2008 12:05 PM

Sorry Kaz, being naughty...I am a stirrer. I did not comment again until reading stuff brought up again by others.

I enjoyed meeting you too and was keen to have that drink we talked of having with FP...I guess I still don't really know what happened afterwards or why.

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 12:03 PM

Not sure I agree with you pixie.
All of us have a past and some baggage, and it is part of what shapes who we are.
All our experiences have an effect on us in some way.
If I was contemplating a long term relationship with someone I would want to know all about their past, sexual history included amongst everything else.

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 12:01 PM

What if you can't remember?....any of it...sexual experiences...age...address...phone number....rsvp moniker.

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 11:59 AM

istj l thought the invite was a general one posted by ninaschen on the blogs a while ago....and yeah its 1145 and lm still at home...which would mean that l am not attending lunch today.....
I found your company last time to be good, even though we didn't get to speak much it was a pleasure to meet you, and one thing l did notice was your nervousness which you quickly overcame. Not easy to do that but you did it well....
Comments about a clique and jollity really do go a long way to stokng fires in my opinion.
They will elicit comment directed back at you if those who attend feel so inclined...and then on it will continue...ad nauseum....... again......

Lets all put it to bed once and for all...it must be getting boring for others to read about...

Continue with your entertaining posts on a variety of topics which personally l find quite fun to read even if l don't respond to them, as l don't respond to many, only those that 'tickle my fancy' so to speak.........K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 9, 2008 11:56 AM

Virgil...I agree with you...see GTTC, I'm agreeable again:))...I would like to know if a new man was into one night stands to make an informed decision about taking things further. However, this would suggest one of our notorious players...and they do not tell till it is way too late.

I don't need to know how many partners a man has been with but that he is medically sound...you know what I mean.

Once you start discussing your past experiences with someone, or they with you, it brings all those people into the bedroom with you and can be a dampner on romance.

Why track back through each other's past? It can destroy the present...I'm not talking big stuff here, just sexual stuff from way back in the seveties:)) and of course, in all my blogging it is JMO.

As far as the age thing goes, I have never in my life lied about my age...until early last year here. It is my true age now, but last year I put it down by two years...and you would not believe the extra number of kisses I got...well you might, not that many.
I put it back to the correct one when I read so many men's opinions here saying how deceptive they thought it to be.

Also Virgil, lying about how many drinks you have had could ultimately, depending on the situation, be far more damaging that dropping your age a few years.

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 11:56 AM

...and what if the number of sexual partners is more than your "ideal"?? She/he was honest and told you??

Surely by the time you are discussing these details you have some connection with this person..so is the number of partners really relevant, or would you say sorry too many theres the door??

Posted by: picklessister at February 9, 2008 11:55 AM

...the number of sexual partners one has had is surely none of anyone elses business...isnt that called baggage and left in the past. Unless the person is carrying HIV or some other STD then that should not be an issue. If/when a woman tells you her age how do you know its correct anyway and so what!

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 9, 2008 11:41 AM

FP
If a woman refused to tell me her age, or number of sexual partners, etc, that would be totally OK.

All I have a problem with, is being lied to.

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:23 AM

GTTC
The number of sexual partners a woman has had, is irrelevant if the numbers are roughly equal, meaning allowing on an average of say 2 different parnters a year over 30 years, thus accommodating peiods of long term relationships,ie marriage and periods of short relationships ie finding the person unsuitable after a short period of time.

I feel no problems with that, however I would feel uncomfortable with a partner who liked one-night-stands and therefore 3 or 4 different partners per week.

I'm sure that most women on here would be uncomfortable having sex with blokes who liked one-night-stands as a regular practice.

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:18 AM

Thanks pixie. Power of original thought is still with me in the morning, unfortunately its left by the time I usually get on at night!!!

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 11:10 AM

Virgil: your comments @ 10:11 am re no one having the right to lie about age &/or sexual history.

Surely being asked to divulge this personal information comes down to personal choice. If you asked me those questions I wouldn't lie if I chose to answer you, but the point is -I wouldn't tell you just because you asked as this is personal information that does not concern you.

Same as our yearly income and wealth- private ,private and then there is private........

Aren't you familiar with the recent privacy act??

Posted by: femalepersuasion at February 9, 2008 11:10 AM

GTTC i like your style :)

Martians aside, your post is well said.

Posted by: picklessister at February 9, 2008 11:09 AM

greattimestocome...well done!!!...good post and exactly right!!!

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 9, 2008 11:07 AM

Oldergent. Hear, hear. Succinctly put.
Cheers, GTTC

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 11:06 AM

Thanks Jen
I think the womans privilege to lie about her age is a fiction of the past. If there is mutual attraction between me and a woman then age is just a number.
Truthfullnes and Trust are always linked together, and are a different issue.

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 11:04 AM

Virgil – your cost model is wrong. Factor in the values for stress-relief enjoyment and challenge. I think the ledger will then be very much in favour of going fishing for those that do so. (Personally I find it rather dull!!)

Strewth, just looked at my last post with the 'martian' in it. Sorry about that - last time I scibe it in word and cut n' paste...

GTTC

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 11:04 AM

Morning all. My turn for a long post!!

ISTJ – I have commented to you before – I’m sure (if I’m wrong, then I Should have!)

As far as willing to lie about where we met – there are two reasons.

I am constantly being reinforced (by those I meet at work, etc) that there is still a stigma attached to internet dating sites. Although I am happy to be asked anything, and will usually provide an answer (except for a completely accurate age and the number of sexual partners I’ve had – take note virgil), there are some things that are across the privacy line that I prefer to keep to myself. Specifically anything about a new relationship and the person I am dating and what we ‘got/get up to’. Telling about meeting people on RSVP is, I think, ‘personal’ until the relationship is well established – then I would have no problem. Frankly, it is no-one else’s business.

Secondly, and a little more chivalrous I guess, is that the lady may not care to have this mentioned to others, so I would defer to her choice. Hopefully this might relieve some concern (if any).

Virgil – I’m surprised!! How is it anyone’s business how many partners a woman has had? Perhaps if in a committed relationship – and quite a way in – it might be nice to share that information so that there were no secrets, however you might not like what you hear. Remember we guys still have that little voice inside that hopes we are of a reasonably high standard… and it often doesn’t like a large range that has set the benchmark – so to speak.

Further, what’s wrong with a little age adjusting on a woman’s part – so long as it comes out in the end and she can get away with it…? I take your point that to lie to your face is wrong (I too, would have a huge problem with this), however if its only been as an assumption on your part or what you read on the profile, then it shouldn’t matter.

NF - Re the ‘giving it away’ for nothing. That’s the situation, environment and circumstances at that time. No comparison. If two people connect, then great for them. If you consider someone else’s behaviour to be appalling or not up to your standard – may I suggest that you just write them off and put them in to the ‘bloody glad I didn’t get caught up with that one’ bucket. Life’s too short to waste energy on them and there are plenty of decent people about.

Anyway, that’s my rant for the morning – have a marvelous day all.

GTTC

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 10:59 AM

If it is not possible for a man to judge a womans age then it is not important, what you have is a human being in front of you, in general what he or she has done in their past life is their own business, what they do with you in the future is the only matter of concern, or should be.

Posted by: oldergent at February 9, 2008 10:58 AM

well pixie you ara absolutely right

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 10:57 AM

Theres nothing wrong with being an accountant..we know how to have fun too!!

Maybe its the whole "fish" thing that seems unexciting :)

Posted by: picklessister at February 9, 2008 10:56 AM

pixie you are right age is just a number. It say nothing about what sort of person you are.
But I agree with Virgil, if a bloke lies to me about his age, which has happened to me, then I just wonder what else he is prepared to lie about.Why not just tell the truth ? At the end of the day I dont care if he is 45 or 55, only that he is honest.

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 10:52 AM

...good heavens Virge you must be an accountant...what about the fun and fresh air of the whole exercise?

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 9, 2008 10:50 AM

on the subject of fishing, what a absolute waste of time. on the basis that most of us here might be in the $25 to $60 per hour range, to pack up gear and go fishing for 2 hours, say 1 hour to get there and get back, materials cost at least $100 including rod, say we dont count that, and just count the consumables at about $15, petrol, maybe parking etc.

Opportunity cos anywhere between $60 and $150 to cach a few small fish, that when we get home, we have to gut de scale clean and cook.

Compare and contrast that with going to the footy, roughly same opportunity cost in time, anywhere between $20 and $40 for ticket and $5 for the bus. We dont want to drive because we will probably have a few beers at the footy.

Then we pick up fish& Chips for the family on the way home, just like most other modern hunter gatherer blokes of the 21st Century.

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 10:44 AM

virgil...get real and dont be soooo serious...women have lied or refused to give their age since the beginning of time!!!...its a woman's privalege and has nothing to do with her honesty etc etc. Lets face it as so many say on this site...age is just a number!

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 9, 2008 10:44 AM

Thats Ok Virgil, it was worth saying twice :)

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 10:27 AM

ahh the gremlins are out again, either the posts dont work, or the double up.
Sorry guys

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 10:13 AM

I dont believe that women have a right to lie about their age or sexual history. In the same way i dont believe guys have the right to lie.

Ultimately, a relationship based on a lie will be built on sand, not on rock.

I suppose it comes down to how long we want relationships to last for. If we are happy to change partners after 3 months or so for the rest of our lives, then starting the relationship with a lie probably wouldn't matter much in the scheme of things.

It seems many people want just that, a new relationship every 3 months or so, maybe with some breaks.

As an aside, I wonder how many relationships start up in late August or early September when their footy side is relegated to mothballs for the next 6 months.

Say by mid February the initial lies could be brought to the surface, and used as an excuse to terminate the relationship.

I feel I would break a relationship with a woman who had lied about her age, as I feel for someone to look me in the face and lie to me, like that would make me always wonder what else she would lie about.

Some lies, the little white lies, like hey I only drank 4 cans while watching the game, dont hurt anyone, but lying about age, is directly deceitful, and a deal breaker. as it goes directly to trust.

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 10:11 AM

I dont believe that women have a right to lie about their age or sexual history. In the same way i dont believe guys have the right to lie.

Ultimately, a relationship based on a lie will be built on sand, not on rock.

I suppose it comes down to how long we want relationships to last for. If we are happy to change partners after 3 months or so for the rest of our lives, then starting the relationship with a lie probably wouldn't matter much in the scheme of things.

It seems many people want just that, a new relationship every 3 months or so, maybe with some breaks.

As an aside, I wonder how many relationships start up in late August or early September when their footy side is relegated to mothballs for the next 6 months.

Say by mid February the initial lies could be brought to the surface, and used as an excuse to terminate the relationship.

I feel I would break a relationship with a woman who had lied about her age, as I feel for someone to look me in the face and lie to me, like that would make me always wonder what else she would lie about.

Some lies, the little white lies, like hey I only drank 4 cans while watching the game, dont hurt anyone, but lying about age, is directly deceitful, and a deal breaker. as it goes directly to trust.

Posted by: virgil at February 9, 2008 10:10 AM

Wendy, I am not the one stoking the fire, but I think you have the wrong end of the stick.
I thought the same of you and would have loved to meet you again. I did not get a personal invitation.
Two bloggers came on here and said that I was full of myself and had only talked about myself to both of them, showing no interest in them. They both said this on these blogs. Anyone who knows me knows this is totally not what I am like but they have both publically said it here...for all to hear and believe...so am I miffed? Yes. Would I want to go to another blogmeet? No...end of story.

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 9:43 AM

Just thought I would check in and just read your comments Istj54 and honestly I am just shaking my head.....correct me if I am wrong....but you were given a personal invite to attend, which you declined. I for one would have liked to have met you again. There was never (that I can recall) anything untoward said to you after that meet, in fact I thought you to be a lovely person. I don't understand what your motivation is to run it down or why you are chosing to keep stoking the fire.....

Posted by: misswendyxx at February 9, 2008 9:31 AM

They'll love him, Pixie. He won't end up like me...chewed up and spat out because I answered their questions...and in doing so was a "bighead"
I'm sure we'll find out next week, and for the next five months, as we are regaled with tales of the day, or days, of endless jollity and fun that was to be had...by the "not clique" but invitation only crowd. They'd have no power if they couldn't share here.

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 9:17 AM

...do you think the twarp will let the mites get a word in??? or will he end up having barra in the yarra??

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 9, 2008 8:50 AM

I think mums hide a lot still. We don't want our children to think less of us, or do as we did. Secrets seem to come out as your children get older. Sometimes it's fun to see the surprise on their faces when you tell them one.
I remember my daughter asking me if I had ever been drunk a few yrs ago.(She thought I was a "stiff")
I looked shocked and said, "No!!"
I actually drank like a fish(not a necrotic one) in my twenties before I had her...now that she is in her twenties I share so much more...but in the formative ones...no!

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 8:44 AM

...all the other fish are preparing to meet the timewarped...there will just be whiting and a few slippery eels on the menu today...apologies from the chef, sir. How would sir like them? They can be prepared to your liking:)

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 8:37 AM

I think my mum took many secrets to her grave. Even her age she was private about. Only found out last year when i obtained my full birth cert that mum suddenly became 8 years younger and was now the age of my father. Yes she married a toy boy.Mum's of that era certainly had standards. When both her and I found out on the same day that the fellow I had been dating (when I was 19) was a married man (his wife found my phone numbers), the situation suddenly changed from -isn't he just the loveliest young man- to- you are a s**t. Yes she surprised me many times.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 9, 2008 8:33 AM

I was fishing for Prawns, Gropers, Snookies, Skipjacks, Snakeheads, Flounderers, Snappers, Redeyes, Boarfish, Snappers, Redeyes, Sprats, Fatheads, Stargazers, Butterfly Gurnards, Dart, Sweetlips, Pigfish, Carp, Sweep (everything under the table), Dogfish, Saucy Scallops, Velvet Leatherjackets, Long Toms, Moon Fish, Striped (Blow you own) trumpeters, milkfish, rabbitfish, redthroated empresses, (knocked off their) Perch, (Can’t get out of) Bedfish, (My Goodness It’s Saturday Morning) Tarwhines, (What a Hot Night I had last Night) Fish, topical Snappers, Whitetail Bedded Bugs, Yellowspot Stupid Goatfish.

I was using a No 6 hook and rotgut for bait.

Oh it is only the whiting biting this morning is it. I’ll go see if I have anything left in my can of worms and change my hooks down to No 1

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 9, 2008 8:27 AM

Blueyes...I know people like your friend and then others who have been celibate for decades...takes all types and I would not deem one less worthy or ethical than the other.

Your other point about your mum was interesting as over the years, in my family, various secrets have indvertently "come out" and you have to wonder what else you don't know about. Some of the lives of those oldies, we think of as so mundane, take on a new light.
Your mum may have surprised you about her opinion and not blinked an eye.

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 8:17 AM

IT HAS TO START SOMEWHERE,SO WHY NOT THROUGH A DATING SITE?

Like an ancient old-growth forest -- where the subtle play of light, texture and shadows is the product of a process measured in centuries and inches -- most things of lasting value develop gradually, at their own pace. The ability to learn from experience -- one of humanity's greatest gifts -- implies constant yet gradual progress. The combination of stillness within and determination without are the essence of this dynamic. Good things sometimes sprout quickly; the truly delightful take much longer.

The principle of gradual development applies to human relationships. For real love and commitment to endure, progress must be slow but steady: slow enough to allow for the bonds to knit properly; steady enough to keep moving in the right direction.

You can't expect to have everything all at once. Development must be allowed to take its allotted time; events must neither be rushed nor manipulated, but allowed to unfold in due course. In this way, you will come to enjoy long-lasting relationships.

Posted by: onlinedatinggoddess at February 9, 2008 8:10 AM

Now here's a different line of thought on whether it is loose morals. I have an acquaintance-and she is not on this site- who feels that just like your stomach needs feeding and your thirst needs quenching,the rest also needs attending to and just sees it as the end part to a great evening out. Maybe she should call it 'Supper'.And before anyone jumps to conclusions,I don't play by her rules.
Has the topic this blog is supposed to be on run out? I know I wouldn't have told my mum. She passed away 3 years ago and I only found out las week through family gossip that a number of years before she married she had been in a long engagment which for reasons unknown no one ever mentioned. My mother would turn over in her grave.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 9, 2008 8:04 AM

Okay...GTTC...just lifted this from your profile...yes, I peeked, am not usually piqued to peek, but since you had never spoken to me before:)..."I saw someone had said - 'willing to lie about where we met' - gave me a chuckle and applies to me too!"GTTC

This is on topic...tell me why?

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 8:04 AM

Jenjen...just 'cos NF says it's so does not mean it is so. Just cos he has met theses women of low morals, who give it away for a block of cheese...and now apparently it is only string cheese(what is that?), it does not reflect on us or any other women on rsvp.
Like any situation where there is a large group of people, or about any thing, whether it be height, weight, intelligence, socio-economics, morals, scruples etc, you get the variety, bell curve. He is just generalising wildly out of some sort of feeling of loss or sense unfairness.
NF pack up your cricket bat and ball and take them home on this one now. Footy starts tonight and it is a new ball game.
Some women give it away, some don't...get over it. It 's the same with men. If we didn't get over the players on this site, there would be no women even here:))
GTTC, I was agreeing about the interest level of the blogs at the moment. It's once again like groundhog day...you keep thinking that this has all been said before and you don't feel like posting the same old opinions over and over and over...just like the Melb women can't let the last blogmeet go...they endlessly get back to it...over n over n over. I, personally, think the slim ones referred to were Weta n Wendy...I know that I am just average...they were slim.
Wendy...there are lots of laughs and comments to pass on to others about our experiences here. I think family and friends would feel deprived if we up and left. I know my daughter and girlfriends would. It is a huge window on humanity(or lack thereof). There are all sorts here...a microcosm. I think this is why it can be so addcitive.

Posted by: istj54 at February 9, 2008 7:48 AM

If we women are so happy to give it away freely then the men aren't any better is they are happy to grab all they can get.
Morning NF-to your statement , on question begging,and I hope you don't really believe what you say, I have met lots of decent men on this site.And if you haven't found your match yet, isn't it fun trying?

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 9, 2008 7:32 AM

NF Well you might not be disillusioned but you are making me feel more so.

Are you saying that all women on internet dating sites are of loose morals ? That we all give it away for nothing and are sexually licentious ? All in the name of the mysterious chemistry ,which I for one no longer believe in, having been seriously led astray by it in the past. Won't be making that mistake again (but that belongs in the other blog).

Nah, you are just looking for a bite. And I am happy to oblige - cant sleep.

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 5:50 AM

Jen

I wasn’t trying to be disillusioned.

I was just trying to finish off (aka have the last say) on a topic some time ago about Chemistry (ie women who give it away for nothing if there is “chemistry”) etc. and to draw some sort of general principle rather than focus on one woman.

I think one person said that no woman should ever have to disclose in public her age, her weight and her sexual history.

Her statement begged the question. Nowhere on the stock standard profile tickaboxes is there any requirement to disclose a woman’s sexual history.

Why women worry about this disclosure is not always their profligacy and sexual licentiousness- that is a given on internet sites- but the fact that they come so cheaply.

You set your own precedents in life.

As soon as the new boyfriend finds out that you gave it away to the last boyfriend for nothing, he will want the same. After all most blokes would prefer to spend their money on their toys, their cars etc. They only spend on a woman what they feel they have to, in order to get to Point A, and feel quite justified in demanding the same terms and conditions and freebies that the last boyfriend got.

No wonder women have so much to hide

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 9, 2008 5:10 AM

Sounds like you belong in the disillusioned corner with some of the rest of us NF

At least you havent lost your sense of humour.

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 9, 2008 4:56 AM

Angus and Mack were discussing Mack’s forthcoming wedding.

“Och mon, it’s all going grand,” says Angus, “I’ve got everything organised already, the flowers, the church, the cars, the reception, even my stag night.”

Mack nods approvingly.

“I’ve even bought a kilt to be married in,” continues Angus.

“A kilt?” exclaims Mack, “that’s braw, you’ll look pure smart in that! And what’s the tartan?”

“Och,” says Angus, “I’d imagine she’ll be in white.”

Thought I might give the String Cheese Incident a break. Did you know there is a bluegrass band named that.

Now the blog question is “Do you tell them you have met someone online”

The question goes begging; you have to meet someone decent before even contemplating telling anyone. I doubt if you would ever come out of the closet with what you meet on here.

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 9, 2008 4:46 AM

VDU, check your RSVP inbox.

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 9, 2008 12:12 AM

Nothing here so far GTTC... you did send it to .com without the .au???

Posted by: victoriadownunder at February 9, 2008 12:05 AM

VDU, mail for you. GTTC

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 8, 2008 11:57 PM

Thanks GTTC, I certainly intend to; ho tmail me to discuss the cocktail situation - it certainly deserves clarification!!!

Posted by: victoriadownunder at February 8, 2008 11:46 PM

Yes I'm up for a Sydney event Lesley. I haven't forgotten the cocktail discussion. Have a great time tomorrow.

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 8, 2008 11:41 PM

Phew... what a relief!!! I checked in several hours ago and thought the blogs had died - I'm very glad I was wrong.

I'm so looking forward to tomorrow's Melbourne Blog Fest, and it seems we may have a few new starters for the next one - Kenny, Virgil, maybe even GTTC? The male:female ratio may soon become more equal...

As far as the "only two weren't fat" argument goes, who gives a toss??? All the bloggers I have met so far have been absolutely gorgeous, whether slim, average or cuddly, male or female!!!

Happy weekend all,

Lesley

Posted by: victoriadownunder at February 8, 2008 11:37 PM

Now ISTJ54, you usually have something interesting to say to others... Why sell yourself short and agree...?

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 8, 2008 11:25 PM

I agree with you, once again, Imanenigma:)) Good Luck!

Posted by: istj54 at February 8, 2008 11:22 PM

I too, offer my best wishes for your day out tomorrow in Mel, fellow bloggers.

Can someone please give us sad miss-outs a blow-by-blow report?

GTTC

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 8, 2008 11:20 PM

Hellooo All!! Is this where everyone has gotten to. Also see MissWendy back! very good.

Whats this I hear about Sydney on the 23rd - is it a secret rendezvous or is any old sloth welcome?

GTTC

Posted by: greattimestocome at February 8, 2008 11:18 PM

Thank you ninaschen.Unfortunately I have to work on sundays so it is difficult to get away.I do have family down there so maybe next time

Posted by: abckenny at February 8, 2008 11:17 PM

I just don't know what to say anymore. I pop in and read the blogs occasionally, see it is the same old same old, only the names are changed , but will bet my backside thats all that has! No offence to the genuine folk on here. I'm not sure RSVP is the answer for this little black duck. Its getting all very ho-hum and I'm over the "cravings" to read who said what to whom etc etc As for romance pffttt!! P.S Enjoy your day out Melbourne bloggers, have a good one!!! :-)

Posted by: imanenigma at February 8, 2008 11:14 PM

NF, I noticed you mentioned Southern Roots festival in Tassie elsewhere - are you coming over for that? If so, will meet you there and buy you a drink. I reckon you need one to cheer yourself up a bit - I know I do.

Posted by: malsie at February 8, 2008 11:10 PM

Ninaschen, allegedly "only two" weren't (and I believe I know who that was deemed to be) - but I believe that was written by someone who wasn't there and really had no firsthand knowledge....not that it matters anyway, the whole concept being so irrelevant, to my way of thinking :)

Posted by: malsie at February 8, 2008 11:06 PM

Thanks, JenJen. I will raise a glass in your honour. I know of one Melbournite going to Sydney and I am working on it but it is not looking hopeful, at this stage.

Good thinking, Virgil! Kill two birds with one stone.

You would have been most welcome, to the Melbourne meet Kenny, you should try for the Sydney one, at least.

Posted by: ninaschen at February 8, 2008 11:02 PM

Soooo this is where we come when we want more exposure....... Well is it working?

Posted by: mystiemuse at February 8, 2008 10:55 PM

Not a lot of action Kenny.If there was,we would be all out getting some of it.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 8, 2008 10:51 PM

that was gold coast not cold but very wet

Posted by: abckenny at February 8, 2008 10:44 PM

oh dear why did i move to the cold coast ...all the action seems to be happening down south

Posted by: abckenny at February 8, 2008 10:41 PM

AuntyKaz - Oh, that's right. Two weren't, apparently. Now I am confused. It might warrant further discussion, tomorrow, methinks!

Posted by: ninaschen at February 8, 2008 10:35 PM

Ladies (you know who I mean), is that a carrot or the almighty "spoon" ??? "G"

Posted by: amdoingit at February 8, 2008 10:34 PM

with the price of air tickets falling, and a trip between Adelaide and Melbourne not anywhere near so expensive as between Perth and Melboune I might make the journey one day, especially if it was in the footy season and an Eagles match could be part of the weekend.

Posted by: virgil at February 8, 2008 10:33 PM

Thanks for the compliment Kenny. you can obviously read and do read profiles since you found my photo. !0 brownie points for you. A shame you live so far away as you would have to lead me astray. As to telling people, I do tell my kids I am dating, the youngest prefers to not know the details but I also tell my friend where and with whom I am going in case i don't return. I have heard a rather nasty story recently of a woman whose date was not what he led her to believe. She ended up in hospital and the court case is now happening.
Mind you I also tell my date, in a nice sort of way, that his photos and contact details are posted on my fridge.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 8, 2008 10:32 PM

Have funny tomorrow Nina, Wendy, Archer and all you Melbourne bloggers. Really looking forward to Sydney on the 23rd. Any of you Melbourne ites going up??

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 8, 2008 10:24 PM

Ninaschen l recall the comment about all the women being fat also....apart from 2 that is...maybe misswendyxx was one of the 2....what you reckon W & N ??????..............K

Posted by: auntykaz at February 8, 2008 10:23 PM

Hi Blueeyes
Nice to have some pretty faces looking back at me

Posted by: abckenny at February 8, 2008 10:20 PM

Wow.......good to see you are all checking in again.....Abckenny, Pixiemagic, Amdoingit, Aliane....

Ninaschen you make me laugh!! Maybe I better sign off and get myself ready now........I need to allow at least 10 hours prep time to live up to your comment!

Looking forward to meeting you too Archerrising :)

Posted by: misswendyxx at February 8, 2008 10:15 PM

Nina, I've been doing the opposite to you my love. "Essen und trinken" .. Thought it would be more fitting... Bugger!!!! Now I'll have my work cut out later won't I?? Oh well, I'll just roll in for now... See you tomorrow... "G"

Posted by: amdoingit at February 8, 2008 10:12 PM

Isnt this funny...last year on Valentines Day I received this beautiful long stemmed red rose from an admirer! at work. I was totally exstactic...first time ever...did I ever get ribbed at work. Then I found out it was from a girlfriend who I've known for some years...she has never dont that before but thought I'd enjoy..no we are not gay and she is ten years younger..what a sweet thought!!

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 8, 2008 10:10 PM

lol - nice one ninaschen. Sounds like tomorrow is going to be big! I understand that even interstate visitors are coming. I'm looking forward to meeting you all...

Posted by: archerrising at February 8, 2008 10:06 PM

Well MissWendy, I am busy losing 20 kg before tomorrow's Blogfest. According to recent comments on the blogs, there were only fat chicks there last time. So that must include me. Now I'm sad. Hang on. You were there too. And you are the most gorgeous little thing I have met for a long time. Does that mean the reports were wrong? Yay! I can eat again! Meet you at the trough, tomorrow.

Posted by: ninaschen at February 8, 2008 10:01 PM

Hi Kenny,
it was recently blogged that you get more people looking at your profile if you participate here and check out who is saying what. I guess that just happened. Nice to see a face to go with the comments.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 8, 2008 10:00 PM

ABC Kenny..... I agree. It seems like you can complete your ideal partner profile based on your likes and dislikes, attractions and turn offs. But I fail to see where much of it counts when rsvp searches keep coming up with totally different age brackets, and almost nothing in common ? how does that work??
I think it must be the same for the ladies, but there are so many profiles where the pic does not come anywhere near the self description details, whats the point in that ?? why cant people Male and female just be honest.?

Posted by: myownspace at February 8, 2008 9:59 PM

I'm home too,whilst dumped daughter is out having fun. When I turned up at a dancing lesson last year with new partner in tow, a nosy women, who had previously met my new man,asked me where I found him. I told her I picked him up in the gutter outside. Recently after parting with him,her stickybeak nature couldn't help but ask where he was. My reply was -I put him back in the gutter where I found him. It depends who asks you where you find them as to how you answer them. And yes it is rather quiet tonight.

Posted by: blueeyes1955 at February 8, 2008 9:56 PM

ABC... was that esp or what?? Simultaneous clicks methinks!!! Did bring a smile... Good luck to you ...

HI Wendy... home earlier than expected so just having a quick sticky nose. Think the others are either busy packing or getting in as much sleep as possible before the shenanigans begin!!!! Catch you soon "G"

Posted by: amdoingit at February 8, 2008 9:53 PM

misswendyxx ...after all it is friday night and a lot of people are out an about...I'm home so you can chat to me (<;)

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 8, 2008 9:48 PM

Hello Ladies n Gents, just wanted to add my 2 cents worth, In this day and age It should not matter when & where a couple meet, but the true reality is that we are judged by anyone and everyone. I would ask my new Lady friend how she felt about any introductions, and made sure I would support her being comfortable in all circumstances first and foremost.
It's not only about trying to be a gentleman, but I think society judges women more harshly than men.

Posted by: myownspace at February 8, 2008 9:46 PM

I think they wore themselves out last night on the other topic ;)

Posted by: dharma61 at February 8, 2008 9:43 PM

misswendyxx don't worry they'll all be back eventually.There is no leaving this place.Perhaps they are all rushing off to melbourne to meet up with Bill(timewarp) on his grand adventure and 68th first date

Posted by: abckenny at February 8, 2008 9:42 PM

It's a bit quiet here tonight.....what's going on? Have people checked out of the Hotel California and....... dare I say it.......actually left???

Posted by: misswendyxx at February 8, 2008 9:34 PM

hi picklessister no it's still raining here in sunny queensland
...and it seems you need to check 1001 profiles before you find one that may be compatible too

Posted by: abckenny at February 8, 2008 9:28 PM

Istj54 my family and friends all know about me being on a dating site and they too love hearing the dating stories I have told them...the good, the bad and the ugly!!

I have no problem with telling people that I met someone on a dating site and agree that it is no different to meeting anywhere else......other than you can get your friends and family to check out the profile too....actually as soon as you say you are going on a date they immediately ask for the profile name to go look them up!!!!!!!

Posted by: misswendyxx at February 8, 2008 9:21 PM

Hmm well its not for me kenny..i guess its a by product of blogging..but i hopped on the blogs if someones comments struck a chord with me..and i didnt want to just sit back and let it go unchallenged.

Plus checking out a 1001 profiles can get a little tedious and blogging breaks up the boredom :)

Has it stopped raining up there in sunny qld yet??

Posted by: picklessister at February 8, 2008 9:18 PM

isn't that why most of us blog? a bit of extra exposure.

Posted by: abckenny at February 8, 2008 8:50 PM

Kenny..everyone will be checking you out now..excuse me for perving too... :)

Posted by: picklessister at February 8, 2008 8:39 PM

Well thank you mistingle.It's about 12 months old but it's me.Now if only I was 4 inches taller,15 years younger and ....

Posted by: abckenny at February 8, 2008 8:29 PM

You can get feedback off people about your profile? How do I go about doing that, or do I realy want my ego squashed even smaller? lol

Anyway on topic...haven't told a soul yet but if anything ever happens through RSVP I would tell them how we met but I don't think I'd care to much what they thought. It would be interesting to see the reactions though.

Posted by: chrome79 at February 8, 2008 7:43 PM

My goodness kenny you definately have a very good photo of yourself. I saw it as one looking at my profile.
Very attractive if this is what you truely look like.

Posted by: mstingle at February 8, 2008 7:18 PM

Posted by: istj54 at February 8, 2008 6:18 PM

Thank you for your feed back, your photo's as I have said before are absolute beautiful and your profile devine.

I am not really back just did a profile up date but really only in the word part.

Otherwise I am off blog still. I popped back after my need for profile feed back and caught your post. I will not be on after today but your contribution is very well appreciated.

Posted by: mstingle at February 8, 2008 7:07 PM

I guess this is it, WnW...the last hoorah.

My children could not care less where I met anyone...if I ever should meet anyone:))

I don't have any grand kids...well I suppose my own children are sometimes grand kids...so don't know what they would think of grandma meeting grandpa online. Kinda funny.

Friends are very interested in my internet experiences. They love the goss, especially the blogging stuff. They think it is really funny.

My eighty-eight year old dad just smirks when I regale him with my tales.

Have I covered everything? I think what I am saying is what I said first. No one cares...they just want me to meet someone. No pressure!

Mstingle, welcome back. I popped back for a visit too. I like your new pictures. I've got some too.

Hi back, somethingwhitty and I think Collingwood might get up there this year.

Timewarp, have fun in Melbourne. The weather will be mild for you, low twenties.

WnW, what do you want to chat about...I might go watch Neighbours. There is nothing happening here. Is everyone else going out tonight and busy getting ready?

Posted by: istj54 at February 8, 2008 6:18 PM

Posted by: woodnwine at February 8, 2008 3:59 PM

Cool! I will contact her too. I have told her only to give my mobile number and nothing else to those that need to contact me so I will contact her if you like and tell her to give you my e...

Posted by: mstingle at February 8, 2008 4:52 PM

Is this now the only blog that works? The topic is dead so I guess we just chat.

mstingle ... I know Bev so will talk to her tonight.

Posted by: woodnwine at February 8, 2008 3:59 PM

okamhere - if you are a first time blogger, somebody somewhere off in technological land has to check your post to make sure it's not offensive. In fact, I tried posting in a forum last night for the first time and it still hasn't appeared so I highly doubt this one will be too speedy either.

On topic though, I just tell people that I met someone on the internet. It's no big deal really, just like meeting someone at the pub; at a sporting event; in the gutter. I'm not much of a socialiser upfront so something like RSVP is ideal for me, unless the woman doesn't like my photo which seems to be a pretty big factor no matter how much they deny it.

Posted by: cyclomaniac at February 8, 2008 1:50 PM

I would just tell people how we met...for me that's the simplest thing to do. For others...saying where they met may be the simplest thing. Does it matter??

As a side issue, I wanted to make a comment in the discussion about who pays for dinner...and some woman walking out with the huffs....but I couldn't figure out how to blog, even though I am sure I posted a comment ages ago!!! Anyway, I think RSVP should have a "Blog user guide for dummies."
Cheers

Posted by: okamhere at February 7, 2008 8:53 AM

neuroticfish ..I think that is sad that you thought more of the pig than your wife..maybe thats your problem?

Posted by: pixiemagic at February 7, 2008 12:47 AM

Hahaha now this is funny. I think my children and family would be flabbergasted if I told them I met someone in the real world, because I don't get much of a chance to do anything without them being there. So online connections are quite the norm in my household. Of course I do meet them face to face but initially online is the most convenient and safe way of having some social interaction.

Posted by: mystiemuse at February 6, 2008 11:47 AM

I don't understand why it wouldn't be fine to tell people where you met. Online seems to be the go now a days so why not be honest and upfront.
You'd probably only be telling when teh relationship is going well.
If others find it odd then they are the odd ones so you shouldn't care.
My kids think it is fun because you have such a big variety of choice. They are on facebook and myspace and other sites so what is so bad about me being online too?

Posted by: oohlala1 at February 6, 2008 11:34 AM

I find it easiest to tell friends that we met at the location of our first date. example: we met at the (name of cafe) he came up to me, smiled and introduced himself then asked if he could buy me a coffee - the rest is 'history' Not a lie, and much easier to keep tract of since it really did happen...

Posted by: tiasamaero at February 5, 2008 1:12 PM

wishful - You must have seen me on my second run around that block ......and my kids are full of giggles and general derision :)

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 5, 2008 12:17 AM

Jenjen.....didn't I see you "around the block"....

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 4, 2008 10:46 PM

"It is a tricky, tricky world when it comes to dating online when you have been around the block before"

Is it ? Why ? Isnt it just tricky no matter where you met ?

Posted by: jenjen57 at February 4, 2008 10:38 PM

Does it really matter where you met? Is RSVP any better/worse than the local pub/club/cafe/concert/whatever? Is it going to make your family or friends any more accepting or rejecting of that new person? Nah.....another bland topic....

Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at February 4, 2008 10:31 PM

What else can be said on this topic? Next please.

Posted by: woodnwine at February 4, 2008 8:59 PM

Re: the Boar
The humour in a joke can be lost in a poor orator,occasionally it's content, but a good technique can more often than not assure good delivery.

Posted by: gypsynurse at February 4, 2008 6:21 PM

I met my first wife at a Pig Roast and I always regret that I didn’t pay enough attention to the pig.

Beat that.

(Now if rsvp functions included pig roasts may be there would be more blokes showing interest in the pigs)

This humour is starting to get very boaring

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 4, 2008 6:15 PM

I have actually posted a blog on my myspace page about the perils (and joys) of dating .. my 'kids' have access to that site so they know what their mother is up to.. or in reality isn't up to..As do my friends.

But at this rate I'm more likely to trip over Mr Somewhat Right in the street .. ;) something I wouldn't at all be surprised about, but then neither would my friends.

Posted by: gypsynurse at February 4, 2008 6:15 PM

If you are contemplating introducing someone to your nearest and dearest one would assume they are going to be a somewhat permanent fixture in your life, in which case your nearest and dearest will only be pleased to see your happiness and the issue of where you met will pale in significance.

Time Warp 1
I have tried on several occasions to post responses to your question but it seems the blog gremlins have eaten those responses.. so...
The name you seek is ShyButPerky
and the pied piper to which I alluded only meant that anything of value required effort and input from both parties to maintain.

Posted by: gypsynurse at February 4, 2008 6:10 PM

This topic will run out of steam quickly, unless we all talk of everything but the topic. Maybe I'm a bit out of it here cause my kids are in WA, but they wouldnt be a bit surprised to hear I've met soeone on RSVP

Posted by: virgil at February 4, 2008 4:15 PM

Just say you met on Rsvp....nobody will believe that one

Posted by: abckenny at February 4, 2008 3:13 PM

Bob - maybe he could say he met her at the fish markets?

Posted by: woodnwine at February 4, 2008 3:06 PM

NF,

Just say you picked her up in a pub.....hey, if its OK for Princess Mary to be picked up in a pub....why the stigma for you average commoner?

Bob

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 4, 2008 3:05 PM

There are still those amongst the older generation who regard the internet as the work of the devil. And dating sites as the fire and brimstone of hell. So for those whose parents/parent are amongst the Pure and Righteous, you can tell them you met at a Fellowship Tea at Church.

Posted by: neuroticfish at February 4, 2008 2:53 PM

Hi All,

I personnally have no Issues saying where I met someone, but I would ask the woman what she wanted me to say should the question arise; and go along with that. Hey, its embarrassing enough for her to turn up with me in the first place, no need to provide further embarrassment to her about where we met if it is an issue.

Bob

Posted by: notgodsgift at February 4, 2008 1:41 PM

Yes, I tell people that we met online ... these days there isn't any embarrasement in that.

Posted by: woodnwine at February 4, 2008 12:39 PM