RSVP Blog
Creating a winning profile: What does it take?
Plucking up the courage to get online to date can be a challenge but then you have to write that profile! Writing a good online profile can be tricky. It's hard to stand out in a way that will get you noticed by the kind of person you're looking for. In this episode of Relationship Matters Lija, an online dating expert, discusses what works and what to avoid and most importantly the best approach to take to achieve success in the online dating game. Have a listen to what Lija has to say Click Here to Listen and then tell us how you went about creating your profile.
Do you have the secret that just might help someone else achieve their dream?
What did you discover worked for you? What things are a must?
And what should be avoided at all costs?
What gets the right kind of person interested in you?
And finally what are your top profile writing tips?
Posted by January 4, 2008 2:57 PM
Latest Comments
You mean I still got 2 dates left to go. No wonder she’s hiding and blocking me. Probably thinks I’ve come up with a new de-apparelling device previously unknown to mankind. Got her worried now.
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 16, 2008 7:32 AM
Apparently, the 3 dates thing has been extended to 5 dates according to the book ‘What Men Want’ which is written by men. As I state on my profile a male friend of mine gave me this as a joke Christmas present. So, ladies we have an extra 2 dates up our sleeves if we don't want to look easy.
Posted by: sue4you at January 16, 2008 1:18 AM
Now that has me thinking that if guys advertised their skills more a woman, say, who need a bit of carpentry one week, plumbing the next, dentistry, legal work...who knows where this could lead fellas...and just to see man walk and talk with his hands...hmmmm...now that would be erudite:))
Posted by: istj54 at January 15, 2008 8:41 AM
The resort may get built more quickly then..you thought of going to Circe de Soliel and so forth for a look then istj54. Hope the holiday was good.
Posted by: slightsynchronicity at January 16, 2008 12:29 AM
Posted by: onlinedatingexpert at January 14, 2008 8:49 AM
Yay, ODE I was just going to post where you a fan of "American Pscyho". Yes that is quirky..good on you.
jenjen - very funny post about women over 40 but men do have some redeeming features too and most of us aren't chasing 22YO waitresses, we are trying hard to find someone of a similar age that has things in common with us so we can form a long-term relationship.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 11:00 AM
today122: you do not have to justify your posts...its all good. Be yourself and don't worry about anyone overreacting.
what sort of job, makes me to tired to blog? Maybe I will get used to it...
Posted by: slightsynchronicity at January 16, 2008 12:25 AM
Maybe I can explain, WISHFUL T.
It's a technique practiced by delta-quality males (that's 4th-rate, if you're not right into the Ancient Greek.)
Been doing it since time immemorial, and is the only reason they haven't died out long ago.
It's commemorated in a cautionary nursery rhyme for girls, which goes something like this:
"Georgie Porgy, gleam in the eye,
Rushed the girls and made them cry.
When the alphas returned from the hunt,
Georgie was gone, the chauvinist grunt."
Posted by: timewarp1 at January 15, 2008 11:46 PM
What if the first couple of dates were just for an hour or two - how do you get to "know" someone in that period of time? I guess respect and self-respect play little part in the whole deal. Jen - 4th date? probably not if sex was all they were after in the first place, and yes if they are a decent guy prepared to put in the time and effort a real relationship may require.
Who knows....you are damned if you do and damned if you don't but I'm not giving up on the thought that the "right" one out there will do the "right" thing..forever the optimist.
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 15, 2008 11:39 PM
Yeah wishful, its actually a better idea to get to know someone a bit better than 3 dates before you get into bed with them I would have thought........JMO
And if you do hook up after 3 dates is there a 4th or do they disappear because you are too "easy"?
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 15, 2008 11:25 PM
Why are these poor excuses for men hell bent on getting a girl into bed in 3 dates? Is it to prove their manhood, their irresistability or what? Why is there a general consensus with these clowns that women are not into a physical relationship? Perhaps if more men put some effort into their performance, techniques and abilities, they might find that the woman they are with will respond a whole lot better. It takes two - she may not be taking part simply because you are a lousy lover!
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 15, 2008 11:05 PM
Do you know where to go, Sue4You? We are in the new 'Singles in the Kitchen' blog. See you there!
Posted by: ninaschen at January 15, 2008 10:02 PM
sue4you............forget it darl, we are all in the kitchen tonight, mm4u is doing some nudie cooking and nf has brought the wine.........
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 15, 2008 9:44 PM
Well tonight I feel like placing a sharp needle through RSVP, it has been impossible to sign on. I think its just as therapeutic as a voodoo doll.
Posted by: sue4you at January 15, 2008 9:35 PM
sue4you - I think just a voodoo doll, if we could really be bothered
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 8:08 PM
sue4you
Now you've got me even more confused. How can a cross stitch be nice?
Posted by: timewarp1 at January 15, 2008 7:59 PM
Sorry timewarp1 I can't embroider would a nice little cross stitch suffice
Posted by: sue4you at January 15, 2008 7:46 PM
I'm still very confused, and need more guidance please from you old hands.
I've only been following the blogs for a coupla months. I know Nfish, what he looks like and how his posts go from misogyny (but not quite venom) to admirable erudition - a cross between ODG and femalepers, you could say.
But I've peeped at all 3, and seeing is believing. Liked her pics the best, of course, even if I heard a meow recently that they weren't taken this month. So what? Never forget
"The older I get, the better I was.
That's why they're called the Good Old Days."
Don't know about Earl the Black Knight - I'm actually post-mediaeval, let alone from biblical times, and Earl was only an occasionally-mentioned bitter memory when I started reading the blogs.
What interests me more is the other bloke, who puts in lots of vague clues about being from the Sydney area or a bit north of that. Distractors?
Old hands: Has he ever had his real profile on show? Or is he totally counter-productive? And is he really a number of spoilers, firing in turn like Gatling barrels?
Or just one overgrown tragic schoolboy who's had such a sad, always-ignored life that he only knows about negative outpourings, in the hope of negative responses which are better than being totally ignored?
If so, I can relate to that. My dad lost the plot when I was eight, and tried to ignore me all the time. Depressing. He died when I was 16, and I don't blame him for the cold shoulder. He did the best he could, and had delighted me when I was younger and he could manage to be magical.
What can we do about this unhappy twisted person?
Would it help if we all prayed for him to feel better about himself, so he didn't need to spoil our game all the time?
Could someone embroider all his negative phony names on a cushion, so we could stick pins in it?
We could give it its first savaging at our Brisbane get-together of a dozen or so bloggers this Sunday arvo perhaps. (A stamp to Jen or me deals you in.) That's teabreak over - back to work.
PS: Good one shadow. Loved it.
Posted by: timewarp1 at January 15, 2008 6:34 PM
....perhaps if men worked on becoming more skilled. You should go back to reading...and practising your Karma Sutra, Necroticfish!
What is the hand doing creeping across the bed?...sounds like something from the Adam's Family...if that's how it starts then that's the prblem...what about the foreplay...it has become a forgotten art.
Now on topic...can't think of anything so I guess all this will be deleted by tomorrow as it involves that three letter word that can't be mentioned.
Posted by: istj54 at January 15, 2008 5:05 PM
....where's that newspaper??
Posted by: istj54 at January 15, 2008 4:50 PM
The hand comes creeping across the bed, and the wife once again pretends to be asleep.
Nightly in the nation's bedrooms women are turning off sex in their droves. There is a yawning gulf between men and women in everyday sexual desire.
Most men feel they aren't getting enough and women feel under pressure to come up with what the men want. That's the elephant in the room in many relationships
Joan Sewell is the author of “I'd Rather Eat Chocolate: Learning to Love my Low Libido” Sewell argues that women have naturally lower sex drives. Joan Sewell's husband Kip would have sex five or six times a week if he could have as much sex as he wanted, compared to her once or twice a month. "If I had a choice between reading a good book and having sex, the book wins," Sewell confesses.
But she still feels guilty about it and has tried to rev up her libido. She's tried everything from talking to therapists, taking hormones, to talking dirty and smearing chocolate on her husband's genitals - all to no avail.
Sewell concludes the real problem is that no one is trying to lower men's sex drives. Why don't we hear men saying, "Doctor, my sex drive is too high. Please do something about it. I feel guilty and ashamed that I don't want less sex. It's killing my marriage."
Don Savage, widely syndicated sex advice columnist, comments that whenever he publishes a letter from a man who complains about not getting enough, he's deluged by what he calls "if only" letters from women ... If only she didn't have to do all the housework, she'd want sex.
By proclaiming that low-libido women are normal, Sewell has done men a favour, suggests Savage: "Well now, thanks to Sewell, straight guys everywhere know that it doesn't matter how much housework you do, or how sincerely interested you are in her day, or how much of the childcare you take on: she still won't want to f*** you. So leave the dishes in the sink, grab a beer and go play a video game, guys. Your 'if only' nightmares are over."
From “The Rules For Men” Op Cit
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 15, 2008 4:50 PM
ha ha - damn hormones, make us lose all reason. bit like beer glasses maybe
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 4:43 PM
NF, Do you mean that men should have sex by date three or just some sort of physical contact, say a kiss??
It is highly suggested to women never to have sex too soon into a new relationship as we produce a chemical called oxytocin. It is a bonding hormone and can attach a woman to the man rather more quickly than is advised. She then is looking at him through those rose coloured glasses and can get hurt. This could well be why men are in such a hurry...JMO
Posted by: istj54 at January 15, 2008 4:36 PM
ah jen - a voice of sunshine and cheer. at last.
and istj - it all goes way south when expectations rear the head, of course. What happened to just fun, without having to think all the time.
I think we're all just getting ahead of ourselves.
and maybe I'm the cranky one.
but at least it's raining again, sorry jen
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 4:33 PM
NF - a "relationship" is two people. Not one person writing the rules that the other has to play by.
If men don't like this skipping around the physical, then maybe they need to actually listen to the person they're trying to get physical with. Simple.
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 4:26 PM
I'm not cranky today122. All thi stalk about relationships...what is a relationship...I'd just like to start with some great conversation, dinners, movies, picnics, walks, whatever and just enjoy "being" with that person for a while before we get to all that "my" needs versus "his" needs stuff. I'd like to have some fun just dating...not htinking relationship all the time. That's when it all gets too heavy and goes south. High expectations far too soon.
Agree WnW, you must stick to your core values at all times but sometimes a good discussion can move you a wee bit...but nor from the important stuff. How do we find out about a person's core values? It can take years of thinking you know someone and then you can be blown away by one of their values that you never saw before....hmmm..bit deep for this afternoon methinks.
Posted by: istj54 at January 15, 2008 4:23 PM
Hi today
This chickybabe never does cranky......and definitely not today :)
I am having a fabulous day where everything is going exactly to plan.
The only relationship we can count on to meet our needs is the emotional one we have with ourselves, other relationships just compliment that ( or take from it ).
And no romantic relationships with wussy snags either thanks, give me a bloke any day.
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 15, 2008 4:20 PM
I think you all missed the point.
Don’t you think, by the way women talk here, especially on the blogs, that they are looking for a non physical “relationship,” and that they deliberately skirt around a major issue that cause so much discontent in relationships between men and women, the physical side of things. It is the great unspoken demon lurking to trap all men on this site into believing the doublespeak and propaganda that women preach and their lackey relationship counsellors and consultants reinforce constantly. One well known newspaper counsellor will only give sexless relationships a spin once a year and no more. She pays lip service to the topic. I bet the men who read her column probably get about that much per year too.
The Rules For Men was written with these vulnerable and susceptible males in mind. Those that might believe this propaganda thrown at them relentlessly. Men. Play by the Rules. If you haven’t had it by the 3rd date- WALK. Rule No 1 in the Rules For Men.
Rule No 2 by the way is- Know how many months you have to live in a de facto relationship before she gets a sense and a right of entitlement to your property. She does. Make sure you know it too.
Rule No 3- if you are feeling pressured to marry (whether the pressure is coming from your gf, your friends (as in “everybody else is getting married”), your mother, your sisters etc) DON’T. Take a sabbatical and think about the folly and foolishness of it all. This applies mostly to men under 40. Older blokes know better.
“The Rules For Men” Snipher Books 2008 Ed The Fish
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 15, 2008 4:19 PM
Is a relationship supposed to enable you to meet your own needs, while at the same time meeting someone else's needs of you. Or is it to expect the other person to meet yours, at the expense of their own?
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 4:11 PM
everyone's cranky here this afternoon.
2 people have thrown in little bombs and retreated safely while we react
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 4:07 PM
istj54 - reasonable comment but I believe you have to maintain your core values and needs.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 15, 2008 4:06 PM
TT,
From what I gather from NF's posts, 60 women a year (I am guessing he takes much more notice of your rants than most) are saying "No" to that proposition you put to Istj54.
Sort of makes you think doesn't it......well, perhaps not; surely it has to be their problem that they keep ditching you.
I keep trying to figure out how you see yourself as a man when you keep running and hiding behind numerous profiles; but maybe you dont and just see yourself us one of us pussies!!
Bob
Posted by: notgodsgift at January 15, 2008 3:57 PM
and maybe some people have spent enough time and energy forgoing their own needs previously, to their own detriment, and cannot go there again
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 3:49 PM
yes I know, abc and WnW. Of course. If one person's own gratification is considered by him/her to be of greater importance than the other person and their needs, then of course it's doomed.
But that's what was suggested.
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 3:43 PM
Woodnwine, you keep saying stuff that I need to query...I guess that is what blogs are for.
I would consider myself more in a successful relationship if I was able to forgo some of my own needs for someone else...I actually think that not forgoing "my own" needs is part of why I have not been successful yet...as well as that three date touching stuff that NF talks about.
...and NF nothing much that happens in my life would lower my self esteem because that is what it is "my" self esteem. What others say about me, or to me, or think of me, does not have much impact. It is firmly entrenched at my old age...why it's called "self" esteem.
...and BTW being a snag can come across as being a wimp or a wuss. Just be a man!
Posted by: istj54 at January 15, 2008 3:34 PM
"snag'
s=sensitive
n=new
a=age
g=guy
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"SLOB" I feel this is me,
S=slow
L=loving
O=old
B=bastard
Posted by: moreofaman4u at January 15, 2008 3:13 PM
For a successful relationship I believe both people should be interested in what they can do for the other, without foregoing their own needs.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 15, 2008 3:10 PM
The woman who is interested in the other person or the relationship is more than likely in a relationship already and not on a dating site seeking self gratification is what the fish was alluding to I feel.
Posted by: abckenny at January 15, 2008 3:02 PM
"never married" is now part of my profile...a good idea as I do get asked if I have been married.
Posted by: ridersonthestorm74 at January 15, 2008 3:01 PM
NF,
Interesting comments but let me ask you this (in all seriousness); what makes you think that women are here for you (or for that matter that you are here for them)?
My understanding is that we are all here for our own purposes....obviously you are because you stated that you put "SNAG" in your profile because thats what women wanted to see in order for you to get what you want?
So, if you are here for self-fulfilment, why shouldn't the women on here be looking for the same?
To me, the name of the game is to find mutual fulfilment by finding someone that suits your personal qualities, and you theirs.
Bob
Posted by: notgodsgift at January 15, 2008 2:58 PM
ye today122 i took my own advice and did place it on my profile just to make sure there was no misconceptions.
Posted by: moreofaman4u at January 15, 2008 2:52 PM
A woman who is more interested in the other person in the relationship that she is never able to leave, is called a mother.
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 2:51 PM
Posted by: moreofaman4u at January 15, 2008 2:38 PM
you can expand on the choices by writing in the wording of your profile that you've never been married
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 2:41 PM
Neuro- I am glad you said "most men" in your BLOG as I can think of a few women in my past who had itchy feet after 3 dates.
Posted by: ridersonthestorm74 at January 15, 2008 2:40 PM
Been here on the blog for awhile now and to me it seems every one has been married ,then divorced. That maybe true,but there is a small number of us who have never been married!.
Even in our profile, when we say single everyone thinks you at one stage had been married.
NO,,,,,,, i would like this to clarify in profiles to say "never married"
Posted by: moreofaman4u at January 15, 2008 2:38 PM
ouch this is gonna hurt "today122"
Posted by: moreofaman4u at January 15, 2008 2:24 PM
NF - "women who are more interested in what they can do for a male are in high demand. They never leave or are allowed to leave, relationships in the first place so they, by definition, won’t be found on a dating site."
Always good to know that women are only on this planet for what they can do for a male. And never being ALLOWED to leave a relationship is a really really good idea, too, I thought.
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 2:21 PM
nf yepp, if you don't make 3rd base ,your never gonna make home plate, and score
Posted by: moreofaman4u at January 15, 2008 2:21 PM
I don’t want to diminish your self esteem Istj, or sound derogatory. I just want to point out that a lot of males still work by the 3 date rule, namely if you haven’t had IT by the 3rd date, you are never going to get it. So at some point between dates 1 and 3 there is going to be some introductory touching or physical contact or you might as well call it a day. If a woman flinches when the male makes the first tentative attempt at physical contact, and there is no reasonable explanation for that withdrawal, that is one of the most telling messages he can receive. More so than anything she is saying. It is body language conveying a very important message (viz she does NOT like you) At that point the male should just walk away
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 15, 2008 2:09 PM
NF...my profile says that naturally I would reciprocate all qualities that I am looking for in a man...but you have given food for thought for the women on this site...we need to start advertising what we can do for "you"...cook, clean, sew, noooooooooo...keep thinking... still thinking............still thinking...ah well...now I know why I am still here...I have nothing to offer...but you could have a lot of fun with chai tea...hmmmm...will that do?...just remember to let it cool down a bit first!
Posted by: istj54 at January 15, 2008 1:27 PM
I must apologise.
I have just checked my copy of the Kama Sutra, page 259.
Position No 4321. Apparently you can begat children , as they say in the Bible, using no hands.
The Chapter is called: Kinky Variations- use cuffs to restrain hands behind back, then proceed as normal.
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 15, 2008 1:15 PM
When writing a profile, always work out what your objective is by being on this site.
99.99% of women, for instance, are on this site for the purposes of self validation.
Their profiles basically are along the lines: this is who I am.
I have yet to read a female profile that says: this is what I can do for you, you lovely man.
Why? Because women who are more interested in what they can do for a male are in high demand. They never leave or are allowed to leave, relationships in the first place so they, by definition, won’t be found on a dating site.
And when it comes to talking about “real men” whoopee do. I include the words “sensitive new age male” in my profile because that is what women want to hear, give them what they want, as a means to an end, and know that it is a facilitator and not a descriptor.
And istj, most men still apply the 3 date rule, so at some point someone is going to get physical or we will all end up in Platonic Heaven where we sit around having cups of Chai day in day out and talking about our feelings, and bonding and hugging trees and loving little children, and motherhood, oh no NOT motherhood (that will never occur if someone doesn’t start touching a female- oh dear they teach this in Grade 1, either in Class or in the playground)
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 15, 2008 1:05 PM
istj54- I love it ! very well said below
Tabletalk, that bench sounds like a good idea for you, but if you look up into a pair of kindly, attractive female eyes they are probably just leaning over you to cover you with their old newspaper. Don 't read anything into it...maybe you could try the personals in it for more dating success.
Posted by: ridersonthestorm74 at January 15, 2008 1:02 PM
Istj54,
Yep agree, not there looking at all and do talk to women regardless when the opportunity arises. You can meet any number of nice people; its the "mix and match" thats the difficult part.
I had a bit of a shot at WnW a while ago (no malice intended) about independence; that is my big leap (of which I am aware anyway). What it says is that it is my issue, not hers, and finding someone that can deal with that, and also has the other mix and match qualities is going to be the fun part.
Bob
Posted by: notgodsgift at January 15, 2008 1:01 PM
NF, when the hands do the talking, I do the walking....and perhaps you have been to DJ's looking for edible undies. I don't think they do those. Perhaps a more discreet outlet.
Notgodsgift...I do pubs but rarely ever see, or meet, anyone suitable. I'm not there looking mind you. Probably like you just there for a drink with friends or a meal, but you would think that over the years you would at least meet a few prospects...but "No" I haven't. What I am getting at is that it seems to be a numbers/luck game anywhere. It makes no difference where you are you are not going to find someone easily or quickly because at our ages it's going to be hard with all the compromise stuff that then kicks in. Almost impossible.
Tabletalk, that bench sounds like a good idea for you, but if you look up into a pair of kindly, attractive female eyes they are probably just leaning over you to cover you with their old newspaper. Don 't read anything into it...maybe you could try the personals in it for more dating success.
And Timewarp...I am always sweet and kindly...just like "The Closer".
Posted by: istj54 at January 15, 2008 12:47 PM
I see there has been yet another reincarnation here, TT has appeared, along with his mudslinging, to see what sticks. It's a dead giveaway when the crap comes out and the profiles are hidden. Amazing what gives some men their thrill, lets throw mud at a bunch of people and see whom we can offend/upset/hurt. At least NF has the guts to put up his profile and not hide.
No, TT, we are not all desperate, some of us are just fussy. As easy as you bag the women on here, you blokes aren't all that great either (sorry to those nice ones..you know who you are). We've been there, done that. None of us married in the first place with plans of divorcing down the track and losing pretty much everything, none of us expected the man of your dreams to turn around one night and whack you just because he needed to assert his "authority". We are here because we choose to be here, because it's a convenient way to meet people, perhaps not the "right" one, but some good friends along the way.
For one so jaded it amazes me that you continue to reinvent yourself (or name) and keep turning up. Obviously the attraction of a smorgasbord of women is still there for you.
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 15, 2008 12:24 PM
Hi Timewarp,
I got my money on NF being Earl and his many other monikers; though he has stuck to NF for a while now.
Both are too easy to detect, though sometimes its hard to tell one from the other...maybe they are Siamese twins?
Sadly, they seem to be pretty smart guys each of them, and say some pretty good stuff at times, but really hard to take them seriously when they feel they have to villify all and sundry. Nothing wrong with airing your opinion, but not necessary to be abusive just because we have had some bad experiences.
Bob
Posted by: notgodsgift at January 15, 2008 12:01 PM
Tabletalk 918am
I think you need to read your post to Notgodsgift. Don’t you think that the positive reasons that you are still here, not the negative ones, apply to everyone else too, male or female?
Timewarp1 1am
Aw shucks! Well golly gee, well thank you sir, you deserve an apple.
Posted by: mstingle at January 15, 2008 11:46 AM
Big surprises for me this morning.
1) Who else is Nfish? (And that is not necrotic, you naughty female! Wash your mouth out with red cordial ,so you feel and talk sweeter.)
I thought he was the goodlooking, deeply-wounded so often mournful, sometimes negative, sometimes cleverly ironic forty-something biker who lives in my next suburb - think Peter Fonda/Easy rider, but taller, better-looking and far more erudite.
Is he someone else too? And if so, why? I see double identities as a way to hurl crud and abuse from behind a photographer's hide, so to speak.
But Nfish is game to stand out in the open and let fly. Often. Fish, not chicken. So I'm having trouble believing he's got an alter-ego too, sniping from cover.
2) And don't tell me Samanthabrit and tablemanners are the same old sniper? Picked her, not him. Is that why she disappeared? Because he was getting all the attention? Must go polish my crystal ball. After I clock off from work tonight. Seeyez.
Posted by: timewarp1 at January 15, 2008 11:35 AM
TT,
Forgot to answer your question "why am I still here"? Sometimes I do wonder myself because the whole contrived approach to meeting people makes it almost impossible to get spontaneity (which is what happens when boy meets girl in live situations). I guess the answer is that until someone can come up with a better alternative to me meeting women my own age; I will just keep plugging away - I am in no mad rush one way or the other.
Whilst I have received my share of knockbacks, I have met some really nice women through this site as well. Just because they were not into me doesn't make them bad people, and maybe they sense something about my character of which I am unaware....who knows??? Unlike your job, you dont get to do exit interviews when dating.
Bob
PS The reference to NF was his enthusiastic embracing of your post in which you stated "I have met real men, but none on this site".....dont think he realised that he is a guy and on this site.
Posted by: notgodsgift at January 15, 2008 11:07 AM
TT,
Firstly, what makes you think that I hang around bars and pubs looking for pickups? Yes, I do go out with my mates to these venues for beers etc, but not everyone that goes to pubs is looking to pick up; its called socialising. Maybe thats your problem with women....you meet them and they immediately feel that your all pervading motivation is to get them in the sack.
My comment about this was that women my age dont seem go out to these places anymore, so you dont get the opportunity to meet them in real life situations. I already have females friends, just no-one in my own age group (other than mates wives etc).
From my reading of the posts here, plenty of people date each other - finding the right partner is the problem. Maybe some are afaid to commit, but plenty just haven't been able to find the person to whom they want to commit - seems to me that you believe that, just because you meet someone to whom you want to commit, they should have the same view and want to commit to you.......sorry, but life and love isn't that easy.
I am not the one sitting at home watching videos (though I do sit at home and watch videos), developing a massive chip on my shoulder and becoming a bitter and twisted old man because I have received a few knockbacks (and I have received a few).
You are hardly in a position to judge others when you cant get over your own lifes disappointments. Give people a break (and give yourself one), we all do what we feel we have to in order to get what we want. It doesn't always work out for us, but thats no reason to villify others just because they choose to keep trying (even if they do regularly fail).
Finally; no fella, I dont have all of the answers, never pretended to either, but I will agree with you on one matter.....asking for dating advice from people on RSVP is insane.....obvously if we had the answers we wouldn't be here.
Bob
Posted by: notgodsgift at January 15, 2008 10:49 AM
Istj. You know exactly what I mean by letting hands do the walking and talking.
Having occasionally shopped for women’s lingerie (not out of any sexual masochistic fantasy but mostly to try to encourage a departure from Bombay Bloomers, and since when did Frigid Jones underwear suddenly regain popularity) I have always asked the DJ’s saleschic if she had a range of self destructing, rapidly disappearing, no physical assistance acquired, knickers and bras, and have always been told that such had not been invented yet. So manual licences are always a good thing to have and to hold, as automatics gear shifts still haven’t hit the market in the world of male/female inter cause.
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 15, 2008 9:54 AM
Posted by: tabletalk at January 15, 2008 7:03 AM
I think you are just having fun stirring people..
as to the real estate analogy, how about 'Excellent investment. Good bones and potential, so don't pass this one by from its exterior."
Posted by: lamuse at January 15, 2008 9:23 AM
And to show how hypocritical women on this site are, if you haven’t made a move on them after 3 dates, they start calling you GAY, as one of them did to me recently, and it wasn’t for want of trying either. It’s just that she reacted to physical touch by jumping back 10 feet and silly me, I had forgotten once again to bring my psychiatry manuals with me on a date. So Pillow Talk, you know, and I know, that there are mountains of bs on this site and in women’s minds. So how about a podcast directed at realities, namely how to cut a swathe through all the psychological mendacity that online women carry on with.
Altho most experienced blokes know that a podcast on that topic would only deal with what they already know; if she doesn’t drink and is heavily into Chai tea, expand the 3 date rule to 12 months and allow yet another year of your life to be wasted before you finally realise that “Hey this so called ‘relationship’ is going nowhere. This woman is really STRANGE.”
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 15, 2008 9:20 AM
Tabletalk/Neuroticfish,
Entitled as you are to your own opinions; it begs the question to both of you "why are you still here then"?
Tabletalk says he hasn't met a real man on the blogs.....that includes you then NF so....congratulations, join the club. In this instance TT I really have to agree with you!!
NF, you put plenty of shit on the ladies that have been on here for years but, if you and Tabletalk are the people we all know you to be, then you have been on here for years too....cuts both ways guys. At least the women here have the guts to put up one profile and live and die by their convictions, not change their identity every few days.
REAL men guys......certainly neither of you.
Bob
Posted by: notgodsgift at January 15, 2008 8:47 AM
Woodnwine....I am just going by my experience and that of other women's conversations over the years....and I am very old now and have heard much.
We all have male friends but usually it is very easy to get rid of a suitor by suggesting that you would like to be "just" friends.
You do weed out the ones who are after other things too, but many still have a bit of hope that you may change your mind later on! JMO.
Necroticfish: Do tell us about this wunnerful woman....and can you walk on your hands? That could be a winner in your profile...Not only can I talk with my hands, I can walk with my hands. Handy...I am a "handy" man.
Now that has me thinking that if guys advertised their skills more a woman, say, who need a bit of carpentry one week, plumbing the next, dentistry, legal work...who knows where this could lead fellas...and just to see man walk and talk with his hands...hmmmm...now that would be erudite:))
Posted by: istj54 at January 15, 2008 8:41 AM
sorry Nina - mmm that was a bit harsh of her!
There's been one real response, but that's why I'm dropping this now. It's all fun until someone gets hurt, so enough fun for now. And I’m only a big chicken after all.
(Tried to post this last night – just froze every time)
Posted by: today122 at January 15, 2008 8:02 AM
TableTalk, you are spot on again as usual. You are a very erudite man. Maybe this year you may get 1 of those 60 you date annually to enable you to change your new moniker to PillowTalk, but on this site, E, you are wasting your breath. At some point everything will have to go in the Trash bin and Empty Trash pressed. What else can you say about the women who have been on this site for over 5 years and who are instantly recognisable because they have used the same photos for the duration. But if you are going to keep knocking your head against a brick wall in futile hope and desperation you have to mouth all the platitudes just to get them within range of stuffing a few bottles of vino down their gullet with nefarious purpose and evil intent in mind (whilst babbling on about relationships, let your hands do the talking and the walking).
Disclaimer: this, of course, does not apply to wonder woman (not the one whose moniker is wonder woman) but the one who is so wonderful that I absolutely adore her.
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 15, 2008 7:43 AM
Hi again
Enjoyed the date - nice enthusiastic person and good-looking too; good food and excellent pestled lemon lime and bitters. And she asked if she can phone me again. All good.
MSTING
I dips me lid to ya. If it was a uni assignment I'd give you a distinction.
Commenting on just your response to my previous post about widows vs divorcees:
Yes you are right: there is always the worry that divorcees may have spoilt their own marriage, learned nothing from that - and be ready to ruin their next relationship with the same counter-productive behaviour.
The divorcees I date are all women. Most of them - well over 50 in total, have told me stories about their Exes that made me believe that my date was the injured party, whether she was dumped like me, or had to leave to protect herself and/or the children.
I'm trusting but not naive. I empathise with these people and share their hope to choose better next time, and to supply and require better behaviour in our next relationships.
I've lost my parents (dad when I was 16, mum 35 years later) and my only son when he was 18. But I'm not a widower.
I've dated a dozen or so widows, and I have felt with nearly all of them that whoever I was and however I behaved, my predecessor would still be uppermost in their thoughts.
They haven't suffered the bad behaviour from their spouse that hopefully breaks the spell of love and, after a decent period of grieving for your vanished dreams, lets you move on with minimum baggage.
Moving on myself, to my cot. Have fun tomorrow while I'm working 2 shifts because I blogged/bludged all day today.
Posted by: timewarp1 at January 15, 2008 1:10 AM
sorry Nina (insert smiley face or grimace or something here!)
and only one real one. that's why this may not be so clever or kind after all.
Posted by: braindancer at January 14, 2008 11:51 PM
today122 at January 14, 2008 8:37 AM
Of course this only my opinion and I haven’t read all your post of course but from memory; I can’t really remember you attacking people. Have a difference of opinion to someone else may be or at times a gripe but we all do that. We can’t be happy about everything, it would be boring if we were all the same and agreed about everything. If someone says something that you disagreee with, it just makes you think about it that’s all and sometimes we change our minds later down the track and think, em they may have had a point. I am sure I am not alone when I say I look froward to your post, whether I understand something from your point of view or not.
today122 at January 14, 2008 8:43 AM
Don’t forget IMA for the massages and building too and Bob said that he would tend the bar as well as help build but he did say he will take no responsibility for any Ladies that enjpy the cocktails too much. We have a chef too from Victoria. By the way how are we supposed to get to our resort? Can any of you men fly planes or helicopters if so maybe a helipad or something has to built also. Ladies with plenty of time off work or studies could sail I suppose, so maybe a Yachts Captain.
Posted by: dolphin46 at January 14, 2008 1:15 PM
Well hopefully it is before I go back to uni or I wont be able to go until mid year break.
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 14, 2008 1:16 PM
Excellent. I will have to go to the grocery store and get myself some of the antivirus programs that you have suggested, maybe a couple of back ups to incase I thing that one program wont do the trick.
Posted by: femalepersuasion at January 14, 2008 1:34 PM
“8. Is butt ugly and too scared to put up their photo
9. People that qualify for No. 8 will also try and sell you the line that it is “what is” on the inside that really counts” (and we all know what crapola that is)”
Now I thought, so much for those who have not been fortunate enough to have been bless with good looks as well as a good personality.
Then I thought okay lets click on this persons profile and she what she looks like, may be she is not as hot as she thinks is, after all we all have different tastes, right?
However what did I find. Gee whiz! Femalepersauasion is not only a very attractive woman but has a really good profile to go with it, darn!
Posted by: femalepersuasion at January 14, 2008 1:48 PM
Don’t agree. I like to see a number of different shots, look at Wendyxx and WnW.I think it looks good and gives you an insight into other things about the person, not just what they look like. I also think that they do look slightly different in all the photo’s, giving you a better idea of what they actually look like.
dolphin46 at January 14, 2008 1:55 PM
I am no super model either but I am sure that some would find me attractive, can’t win them all. I was also thinking too, so all those that are not drop dead gorgeous, what are they supposed to do, leave RSVP. Don’t they deserve to try and find someone to love and be loved in return? Reflecting on FP’s post (# 8)
woodnwine at January 14, 2008 2:13 PM
Yes I think I can remember some of the ladies on the blog saying that they didn’t think it was a big a deal if it was on a couple of years. I agree, if some one was a couple of years older (not too many years older though) I would then read their profile to see if they matched what I was looking for and then look at the photo and if I found the person was attractive to me, I would accept and allow they to email. However when I read profiles and see that I am just 1 year older than what they were looking for I would not initiate contact but this is a confidence thing.
dolphin46 at January 14, 2008 2:23 PM
I think you should just leave it as it is because what ever you put we all get responses from those we want response from and those we do not, I don’t think it would change anything. Sticking to what you want makes more sense.
dolphin46 at January 14, 2008 2:23 PM
Yes my profile includes older and younger males to myself. Simple because after a certain age I don’t think it really matters as long as it is not way out. Just as there are no two women the same at any particular age I think it also goes for men.
Posted by: timewarp1 at January 14, 2008 4:45 PM
“2) I have a slight personal preference for 'divorced' over 'widow'.”
Now that’s an interesting topic!
We may have all wondered about this one. If a person is divorced you think why? because they may have qualities that I would dislike as much as their expartner. would we have just as many problems? Of course they could be the right one for you but we all ask even if we are also divorced, why did their marriage fail?
Then the widow we may think on one hand they did not get a divorce so they may have been a stable person in a stable loving relationship, isn’t that nice, nothing to worry about here. However what if they are looking for a replacement and we will never live up to their dearly departed. We also want to be loved by them more than they ever loved anyone else (ego). No one wants to be second on anyones list.
Divorced or widowed we all bring with us past experinces, we just have to believe that obsticles can be cast aside and true love can prevail.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 5:01 PM
I listed the 60’s but I also listed Black Eyed Pea’s and other mod’s. I like anything but heavy metal. The era does not matter as much as the music and the words that, if they speak to me, that is all that matters. I am sure I am not the only woman post 40 that likes modern music as much as classical say.
junebaby57 at January 14, 2008 6:13 PM
Exactamundo: Spot on!
Size 14 is the average size for the Australian woman, but it may be on the increase but 14 is it at present. However you may look at two women and think one is slender the other over wieght.
Muscle, bone structure and everything else that goes into making the female body differes from one female to the next. I have a girl friend she is a size 14 but she is slim.
I on the other am a size 14 but I am fat so it may please some that I have put in my profile that I am over wieght. So any one has a problem with me being fat, I have a siple solution for you! DON’T CONTACT ME. Simple isn’t it really. Oh and if that is not enough for you and you want to come across as being childish and picky just post your disgusts about fat people on the blog.
woodnwine at January 14, 2008 6:24 PM
Naughty, naughty, have you now! J
sue4you at January 14, 2008 6:33 PM
I am glad the blog cheered you up after work. Hopefully work isn’t to bad where you are.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 6:49 PM
It does get frustrating especially when shopping for children but sizes do not seem to be as regulated as they should be. I have found this especially with childrens clothes that come from overseas. A child of age 6 from a country where the people are of a relatively smaller bone structure and hieght would be a different build to the average 6 year old here. Look at bikes for toddlers some I think would be too small for my Chihuahua.
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 14, 2008 6:49 PM
I agree some but not all. Some are rude but others are just being helpful and if the person that they talk to don’t mind or want help then that is okay.
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 14, 2008 6:55 PM
Chortle J
tabletalk at January 14, 2008 6:58 PM
“That is that men are attracted to women for sex , simple plain and honest”.
I wish someone had told that to my ex, lol.
Posted by: mstingle at January 14, 2008 11:24 PM
TWO real ones Today122 (insert winking face here)! I was cut by your 'don't wish to correspond any further' reply. Story of my life, it seems (tongue in cheek, now)!
Posted by: ninaschen at January 14, 2008 11:20 PM
and thank you ninaschen.
Posted by: today122 at January 14, 2008 11:14 PM
one real one just now, oh dear.
I don't know if I really like this after all.
Posted by: today122 at January 14, 2008 11:12 PM
istj54 - I thought you were being presumptuous about men not wanting to be friends if nothing else was on the cards. Concerning children, my stepdaughter used to tell me to turn JJJ off but now that she is 18, it's pretty much all she listens to.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 11:06 PM
Today122, none that wouldn't get you into trouble or sued :)
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 11:03 PM
yes - you did.
but we have jenjen to thank for that.
now - photo? any suggestions?
Posted by: today122 at January 14, 2008 11:00 PM
Braindancer, too funny. Wonder what sort of response that will have! Way to go Today122 (I'm assuming I got that right).
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 10:55 PM
Sorry, Stratus. I randomly leave the 'r' out of your name. Here are the missing ones: r r r, use them wisely.
Actually, I quite like the name 'Status' too! That could reel in the shallow!
Posted by: ninaschen at January 14, 2008 10:49 PM
thinking of an appearace..........
silly me, I'd forgotten the visual predilections here
Posted by: today122 at January 14, 2008 10:49 PM
Damn, I once contacted someone because their spelling was so atrocious I thought they must have been joking. The only reason I didn't go out with him was because I went out with someone else instead, so I never got to see what he was really like.
Posted by: sue4you at January 14, 2008 10:48 PM
sorry ninaschen, I was just looking for a "I scared the dog again'
Posted by: stratus65 at January 14, 2008 10:47 PM
VERY funny Stratus! Loved the kiss reply!
I'm not a fan of in-jokes so I will explain. I sent Status a (friendship) kiss saying I liked his sense of humour. He replied with the 'left wondering if you have read my profile' response. I snorted vodka out of my nose, receiving that!
Posted by: ninaschen at January 14, 2008 10:45 PM
Today that's a 50% response rate, that has to be a winner already!
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 10:42 PM
today122
Definitely, as you may well know, guys are predominantly visual, so then you can truly send out the kiss reply as to whether they have actually read your profile.
Apology emails, I thought of that during the day, but still that didn't stop me.
Posted by: stratus65 at January 14, 2008 10:41 PM
stratus - apology emails - I hadn't thought of that!!!???
Posted by: today122 at January 14, 2008 10:35 PM
Posted by: stratus65 at January 14, 2008 9:02 PM
daily reports, with an end of the week summary, and I think that we should expect the same from you perhaps??
stratus - two kisses out, but only one reply. no newies yet. maybe a photo would assist?
Posted by: today122 at January 14, 2008 10:33 PM
ninaschen
I do not believe that I will be initiating contact, and rather sit and wait to see what happens. I do think that I do receive a reasonable response from my (last) profile, however I have nothing to gauge this by, as to whether it is above or below average. Maybe the only winner here will be RSVP with the amount of stamps that I need to get to send out all the apologies.
Sue4You
I know of a couple of people who cannot spell or write correctly to save their lives, together with the fact that no person can even read back what they have written.
Posted by: stratus65 at January 14, 2008 10:28 PM
Sue4You - Oh yes, indeedy, they can! Some profiles are appalling - almost as bad as our friend's.
I don't agree with Stratus that it will make little difference to his level of contact, I think women will be more discerning. By the way Stratus, how much contact do you usually get? And will you be contacting people randomly or sitting back waiting for them to contact you? Let the games begin!
Posted by: ninaschen at January 14, 2008 10:15 PM
Very clever, ISTJ! And yeah, we all have to eat - perhaps no need to mention it at all!
Posted by: ninaschen at January 14, 2008 10:08 PM
Stratus65, I think you'll get more hits. Women are going to read your profile and say, what a great sense of humour this guy has. No one spells that badly, do they??
Posted by: sue4you at January 14, 2008 10:07 PM
femalepersuasion
Thank you for your comments, as to your question, well in a sense, it still reflects me, however in a totally different light. Many comments have been made on what to include, change, or exclude from a persons profile. I have studied human behaviour, and I do not believe that there will be that great a change in how responsive my profile is, as I believe it is based on a general look and feel, rather than on how it is constructed. And perhaps it may dissuade the pretentious.
Posted by: stratus65 at January 14, 2008 9:56 PM
Ninaschen, dinning out is when you get a take-away and listen to "bad" eighties music!
On the other hand, dining out suggests white table cloths and faint musak in the background.
Maybe we could just write that we like to eat in our profiles.
Posted by: istj54 at January 14, 2008 9:45 PM
Stratus...your profile is a hoot - I wonder what the outcome will be - so keep us posted.
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 9:39 PM
Stratus65: I really enjoyed reading your previous profile and you are very handsome..so why have you changed your profile ?? I don't understand, can you enlighten me at all ??
Posted by: femalepersuasion at January 14, 2008 9:35 PM
Woodnwine l quite like Linkin Park and just heard Shadow of the day on the radio................K
Posted by: auntykaz at January 14, 2008 9:33 PM
junebaby57
Yes, a complete blonde moment!! It all started out with jenjen57 posting a few selected lines poorly written from profiles and I suggested that I redo my profile, and see if there is really a difference in the response, and if anybody really takes that much notice in how poorly a profile is written. Perhaps it may just be the overall look and feel of a profile whether it is successful or not, we shall see.
ninaschen - yes I will have an explanation once I reconstruct myself. Yes 'dinning out' I will include that one.
Posted by: stratus65 at January 14, 2008 9:31 PM
Woodnwine...again...sorry to keep talking to you tonight....If you have a son who is 23, you can't help but have listened to "all" the new stuff. I love most of it and enjoy hip-hop, rap etc as well as everything in the nineties too.
Must admit that I yell to turn it down at times!
Posted by: istj54 at January 14, 2008 9:25 PM
Very brave Stratus! But you forgot that you love 'dinning' out. A lot of people enjoy 'dinning' out, apparently. I do hope when you post your real profile back up you will put a little explanation in there for all those prospectives who may be very confused about your sudden metamorphosis.
Posted by: ninaschen at January 14, 2008 9:25 PM
jewels - just a little social experiment with regard to profile content being undertaken by the brave and curious :)
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 14, 2008 9:24 PM
wnw.........FM radio can be soooo repetitive, JJJ excepted more than the others, and the DJs are just so inane most of the time. The endless advertising on B105, Nova, MMM and 97.3 is also tedious and boring.
Honestly some of the drivel that those DJs come out with sent me back to (predominantly) AM a long time ago.
And for me personally, I confess to being a talkback radio tragic :(
(Listener, not participant).
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 14, 2008 9:21 PM
jen, today and stratus, what is the bet again, cause , stratus your profile looks like you had a huge blonde moment!!! Or have I?? jewels
Posted by: junebaby57 at January 14, 2008 9:19 PM
Suzie...I think you are right and he should come out and clarify that for us....if he is just looking for sex then that is extremely tacky. I was giving him the benefit of the doubt there. Perhaps he is undeserving of that and is doing himself a diservice re women and missing out on their high intelligence, conversation, capabilities, wit, humour etc...etc...that Woodnwine sees in women:)
What I am trying to say is that it is a major ingredient in what "most" of us are looking for here and that if it is not there the relationship is not going to get off the ground, except as friends. I may have worded my post badly.
Woodnwine, which assumptions were incorrect, so that I can clarify my point of view?
Posted by: istj54 at January 14, 2008 9:17 PM
Ladies ..... I ask again, what is it with music. Tonight I've looked at some more profiles and am wondering if anyone over 40 listens to FM radio let alone JJJ. They didn't stop releasing music in 1989.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 9:13 PM
jenjen57
I am thinking that I would have to give it at least a full week, perhaps two, depending on the response rate, and also I might add the quality of response.
Posted by: stratus65 at January 14, 2008 9:06 PM
today122
daily reports, with an end of the week summary, and I think that we should expect the same from you perhaps??
Posted by: stratus65 at January 14, 2008 9:02 PM
istj54 - you make many assumptions, not all of which are correct.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 9:01 PM
stratus65.........hmmmmmmm.......this is definitely going to be interesting......I must admit I am genuinely interested in evaluating what if any difference the profile truly makes to our success rate around here.........how long are you giving it ??
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 14, 2008 9:01 PM
Thanks shadow....there is only ONE type I think.....and of course only ONE team :) Jenjen supports the same ones too!
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 9:00 PM
and the results of this experiment will be published?
Posted by: today122 at January 14, 2008 8:59 PM
hmm lstj... i think maybe you were a tad harsh.. If i read tabletop's post correctly he said that ALL men were after was sex... which as you yourself have just said is not the truth.. that they want 'all' that involves.. So I think WnW was justified in what he has said... Perhaps if tabletop has said that men did not just want sex he wouldn't have had a need to say anything???
Posted by: seraphsuzie at January 14, 2008 8:58 PM
hi all
is no-one playing here tonight?
Brisbane bloggers meet - If anyone is interested and is wanting details, please contact either jenjen57, timewarp1 or me. My profile is up but totally bare bones - long story.
Posted by: today122 at January 14, 2008 8:56 PM
jenjen
It is complete, the social experiment starts today.
Posted by: stratus65 at January 14, 2008 8:48 PM
tablemanners - as a man who likes women for a lot more than sex, I found your last post extremely offensive not only to women but to men as well. I suggest you seriously consider getting a life.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 8:02 PM
......suggesting that you do like women for sex....a wee bit hypocritical, WnW, I think...Are we not "mostly" here looking for a lover?
....Or is it a pen-pal site?
Let's face it both sexes size each other up immediately and place the other into a certain category. Of course we all have friends of both sexes and will all continue to do so, but to deny that those first meetings do not have sexual overtones/undertones is ridiculous....Both sexes are judging if the other could become a lover.
We women call it chemistry....if it's not there you go straight away into the "friend" bin....and how many men reply afterwards when you write that you would just like to be friends....not many....in fact none!
So all quit kidding yourselves about what you are here for....you are looking for a partner and "all" that involves....are you not?
Posted by: istj54 at January 14, 2008 8:46 PM
Wish- your on!
Posted by: ridersonthestorm74 at January 14, 2008 8:06 PM
tablemanners - as a man who likes women for a lot more than sex, I found your last post extremely offensive not only to women but to men as well. I suggest you seriously consider getting a life.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 8:02 PM
Well alrighty then as long as it wasn't too soft or soppy or open or anything I figure it's me, it's honest, and hopefully "Ms I can put up with your bad habits" will decide to materialise shortly from it. If not well you can't rush these big jobs can you?
Ps: Wishful- at least you support the right style of Rugby :)
Posted by: shadowzone at January 14, 2008 7:41 PM
Glad to see you are up and running now Shadowzone....nicely done too I might add
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 7:31 PM
Looking good shadowzone :)
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 14, 2008 7:29 PM
I find women with pronounced dracula teeth (or off at a slight angle even) attractive. I have no idea why. I also like women from Ireland with read hair and green eyes and I like women. Women are wonderful mystical creatures, I will never understand them and I think this is half the attraction factor for me. Nah who could not want to be attracted to them?
Damn all women are gorgeous as for the really skinny ones? They bruise you. It isnt a good thing at all...
Posted by: shadowzone at January 14, 2008 7:24 PM
NFish @ 6.49pm:
You are right right right, sir!
I neverdunnit, no I didn't. It weren't me, sir!
And I really admire the heavy gravitas of your resounding pontificating pronouncement about their inexcusable arrogant impertinance.
Should have been delivered from the very top of Mt Gravatt (with the odd lightning bolt to make it truly audio-visual), not just from home at Mansfield. Howdy neighbour!
Must stop this nonsense and head off to the Brekky Creek pub for tonight's RSVP first date. I think I'm looking forward to it!
Posted by: timewarp1 at January 14, 2008 7:22 PM
Auntykaz great answer!!!!!! There you go wnw.
Posted by: dolphin46 at January 14, 2008 7:17 PM
Nf - lighten up, just having a bit of fun with the topic.
And at the end of the day it doesnt actually seem to matter too much whether our profiles have perfect spelling/grammar or not with regard to our success in finding our special someone.
tabletalk - not giving you a spray at all.
When you say that men are attracted to women for sex, I refuse to believe that is all that they are attracted to.
Of course sexual attraction is very important to both men AND women, but attraction is often something not easily defined.........a smile, eyes, walk,voice or something you just cant put your finger on..........
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 14, 2008 7:17 PM
O.K. Folks my profile is now available for your viewing and grading pleasure
Thanks,
S.
Ps: not all of us want women for sex I actually enjoy their company and insight into stuff on occasion. Especially when they are able to inform me of simple little basic things I have overlooked in dealing with my business partners and other work related colleagues it makes my life so much better. Oh that and just sitting round talking with them by the beach is an awesome way to de stress it just isn't the same with the guys...
Posted by: shadowzone at January 14, 2008 7:16 PM
Sue4you, i posted a while ago (ie 4pm Today) about photos but now its gone. I agree that you can't judge everyone by a photo,the people i have met from rsvp have all looked better than their photos. I think if your not a supermodel with airbrushing and the works a photo doesn't do any one any justice.
Tabletalk you need to meet some "real" men.
WnW you rat..... don't think you will get away with that!!!
Jenjen, loved the 29 lines. Humor wins me every time
Posted by: dolphin46 at January 14, 2008 7:15 PM
No, Suzie...not just that...they need someone to find the remote control when it has been misplaced and of course to serve the cold beer (sorry guys, I don't really mean it...)
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 7:12 PM
Woodnwine, you have to kiss a lot of Princesses to find your Queen, you know that.....................K
Posted by: auntykaz at January 14, 2008 7:11 PM
oh don't tell me tabletalk is the thing with lots of names that hates everyone? damn i just wasted my words and typing on him? crap!
Posted by: seraphsuzie at January 14, 2008 7:11 PM
Tabletalk.. where did you leave your club? In the cave? cause gee you sound so much like a neanderthal...
So by your reckoning.. ALL the men in the world only want women for sex.. pure and simple.. nothing else just sex...
You are hilarious.. not only do you insult women.. but your insulting your fellow man but placing them all in the same bed as you... a man who it would seem has NO idea about women, relationships or his own sex...
Posted by: seraphsuzie at January 14, 2008 7:07 PM
TableTalk - You really seem obssessed with the whole (female) weight issue. Were you traumatised by a fat woman sitting on you when you were little? You have pushed the same barrow in just about every name you have blogged under. Give it a rest.
Posted by: ninaschen at January 14, 2008 7:06 PM
Just to change the subject. Photos. Just recently I met two men socially at a function with another RSVPer. In the car, I said, wow Bill and Fred (names changed to protect the innocent) look really familiar,I think Ive met them somewhere, whereby I was then informed that they were on RSVP also. We rushed backed home, jumped on RSVP and sure enough both of them had sent me kisses and I'd said no mainly because their photos looked like they were axe murderers. They didn't look anything like their photos except for a vague similarity and were much nicer than their photos. They however recognised me but didn't say a word.
When I met them again (all three of them were good friends but didn't know that they had all kissed me) the other two asked me why I'd picked the one I did. So I told them it was purely and simply because of the photo. I have to wonder about guys who have to take their own photo, makes me think they are a Nigel no friends.
So to all the men, get someone else to take a decent photo of you.
Posted by: sue4you at January 14, 2008 7:01 PM
NF - you appear to have your grumpy scales on again. Colour me stupid, isn't the whole topic about writing better profiles?
In highlighting things that turn us away (ie. the faults, bad wording or whatever), we are, in a small way, giving others ideas of what does detract from a profile, and thus by avoiding such, may enhance their success.
Arrogant, I don't think so; self-obsessed, hardly; self righteous, not in this life time; self opinionated, okay you've got me there; self-centred, can't say that I am, and an egocentric boor, hmm...not for me to judge, however, you've seen to be judge and jury on all accounts.
If that is how we come across to everyone, then I guess since "everyone" has participated, then we are in great company....but then again, everyone is entitled to their opinion...
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 7:00 PM
Hello Box Brownie! I thought you'd never be back. (Actually, I had been hoping to get minnieme into my overnight bag for my trip from the previous blog straight to the Maldives, and then forget to unzip you out ... )
But you gave yourself away again, as usual. Your sentiments are unmistakenly male - someone who was called Samantha and who was bright would sail speedily through the longest post - even yours last year when you were still in the positive phase of attention-seeking.
What mischief have you in mind for this aging blog? Who will you attack next? Let's all guess ...
Pick me! No, pick me!
Posted by: timewarp1 at January 14, 2008 6:57 PM
Twenty Nine Lines To Make You Smile
Have seen some of these used as profile headlines.................
1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
5.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me 7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
9.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.
10.. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
13.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
14.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
16.. Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!
17.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
18 . Procrastinate Now!
19.. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
20.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
21.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
22..Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
23..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
24..He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
25.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
26..Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
27.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.
28.. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.
29.. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 14, 2008 6:55 PM
People who go through other people’s profiles to find faults, quirks, errors and omissions and people who purport to dictate what other people should have in their profile and their choice of wording, would have to be some of the most arrogant, self obsessed, self righteous, self opinionated, self centred egocentric boors of all time. And that is exactly how you come across to every one that reads your nonsense.
Posted by: neuroticfish at January 14, 2008 6:49 PM
I did say from a dumb males POV ........ but I do understand that sizes do differ slightly according to brand. Surely there should be regulations covering this, must make shopping frustrating.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 6:49 PM
WnW, different sizes for different labels I think Junebaby was getting at. I can go purchase something from one store and get a 12 (and go home smiling) or find something at another store very similiar and it be a 14.
Male sizes are harder to picture I guess, a 36" waist means nothing to me - it'd be a lot easier if you guys had simple sizes like we do :)
I don't think height is directly related to dress size....but I could be wrong, I just know for me if I find something with a tag smaller than I'd usually buy- I want to leave it hanging out the back!!!
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 6:45 PM
you are right WnW, weight is related to height, I forgot that bit....jewels
Posted by: junebaby57 at January 14, 2008 6:43 PM
dolphin46 - I was think of ass but am not saying this in a nasty way, just laughing out loud.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 6:42 PM
WnW, dress size is related to the label...as sue4you said. Weight also is not an indicator.. I am an 8-10 but if i was to tell my weight it would not correspond to those sizes. And nooooooooo way am i telling. And anyway what's average??? We all have our own ideas re that.
Posted by: dolphin46 at January 14, 2008 6:39 PM
junebaby - I think dress size would have to be related to height wouldn't it .... as would a man's waist measurement?
From a dumb male's POV, a 4' 10" woman size 12 may be slightly overweight whereas a 5' 10" woman size 14 would be average. From what I have read (not here) the size of the average women is between 12 & 14, depending on height.
Similarly a 5' man with a waist measurement of 34" may be slightly overweight whereas a 6' man with a waist measurement of 36" may be average. I would think the average man would be 34-38" depending on height.
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 6:35 PM
Wnw... what is the answer??? I am having a senior moment and can't think..........
Posted by: dolphin46 at January 14, 2008 6:35 PM
Just started back at work today after 4 weeks holiday and wanted to say reading these blogs after that first day at work has cheered me up. Where to get time to write so much?
I have to agree that the age thing is somewhat subjective, when you start talking to someone in a social situation you have no idea how old they are. Why is everyone so hung up on the age thing on RSVP?
Same with size. You can be size 8 in one label and size 12 in another.
Posted by: sue4you at January 14, 2008 6:33 PM
tabletalk you lost me re who is younger than the 44 year old who looks prettier than the younger one who is older than the good looking one etc
Good luck in your search for ??? younger, prettier one , not sure where that will lead you .
Twoeyes, you are the exception to the rule with your broad age range...... re the distance thing, if you like the look of some one go for it. The old saying nothing ventured.... nothing gained.
Posted by: dolphin46 at January 14, 2008 6:32 PM
there are some men in life you just wanna slap... the ones that think they were put here for women to serve them.. who think with their ego's and expect women to be perfect little barbie dolls.. from the day they are born to the day they die while they shrivel up, get beer guts, lose their hair and end up with no teeth.. Tabletalk.. I reckon you fit the bill :-)
Posted by: seraphsuzie at January 14, 2008 6:32 PM
TABLETALK Jan 14, 2.05pm
"i use a name to post and a name for my profile, it is a good idea to do this and I would suggest others do the same to avoid abusive attacks or unwanted contacts."
Mate, I'm having trouble getting my head around this idea, and all of your last couple of posts.
1) You say your real (other) profile is dead accurate. But you say
"I really don't care how many send me kisses or don't. I would rather not attract anyone than to attract someone and have it fail anyway."
So why do you have that other profile up anyway? What's your reason?
You sound very negative - like a big dose of the MAF that I was talking about in my post at 2.24pm today.
2) And I wonder why you have this second hidden profile too, just for blogging? Why do you want to join in here anyway?
I'm confused because the things you're saying here are not likely to make you any friends among the bloggers, OR among the large non-contributing readership.
Yes mate - you are dead right about some women being young for their age, and some younger ones already prematurely aged.
But what woman wants someone who even admits that he is just looking for the youngest and prettiest? That's serial trade-in territory!
* And why is that what you want, anyway? Is it to get even with your Ex?
* Or is it just for you, so that you have a beautiful trophy - someone younger and prettier than you are (and maybe younger and prettier than you deserve - can't see your "very accurate" real profile, to know whether you're God's gift to all women yourself, or not quite.)
Be a man and tell us your real name, as someone did today below, or admit that you are something else.
* Or do you want the trophy just to make other men jealous? That's the biggest reason for a lot of men.
"I don't look like much, but look at the missus! I must be OK to keep her happy, eh?"
3) I was very disappointed by the open aggression in the beginning of your post at 4.46pm.
If you are angry, go run 2 or 3 miles till you simmer down, as I often did in my thirties. Does you good.
But please don't spoil our civilised cheerful discussions with your negativity and mis-placed anger. Do yourself and us a favour and join an anger-management group instead.
PS to RSVP: Peer-driven self-regulation at work.
Posted by: timewarp1 at January 14, 2008 6:26 PM
If women have to kiss a lot of frogs, what do men have to kiss a lot of? No rude answers please because I already thought of that answer ..... unless that is the real answer?
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 6:24 PM
tabletalk, whose version of average. Some guys think size 10 is average, some official stats say size 14 is average. Do you use american or australian sizes!!! As they greatly vary.
I would not participate in anything that asked actual weight, it is no ones business but my doctor's. Next you will be asking cup size on profiles!!!!
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and it truly is.
If you have met people that lie, don't look like thier photo's etc, tell them straight and move on.
I have met men who say they are brown haired or blonde, when they are either bald or gray, I have also met men that have lied about their age and weight, but I didn't see them again as I do not like liars.
It is a case of kissing lots of frogs, in some cases toads before you find the right one...have a lovely evening...jewels
Posted by: junebaby57 at January 14, 2008 6:13 PM
I believe that W.I.N.E is good for that particular type of bug.......taking some for medicanol purposes now...lol...jewels
Posted by: junebaby57 at January 14, 2008 6:02 PM
WINE IT IS THEN...............
Posted by: twoeyes at January 14, 2008 6:11 PM
shame I didn't know about that W.O.R K virus before I went to work this morning!!!! Home now but I believe that W.I.N.E is good for that particular type of bug.......taking some for medicanol purposes now...lol...jewels
Posted by: junebaby57 at January 14, 2008 6:02 PM
Samanthabrit....the system tends to slow down regardless of what is posted and/or how long they are. The majority of the blogs are related to the topic (okay, some you might need to stretch your imagination just a touch), but the length of them is often necessary - no point in half a posting, unless you are ODE and his often come in two parts!
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 6:00 PM
Just as dishonest to say you are average when you are fat.
Would save a lot of pain if people put down their weight and then maybe how much overweight they thought they were and if they were attemting to do something about it.
Posted by: tabletalk at January 14, 2008 1:44 PM
I will prefer to see her if she is prettier and younger looking than the 44 year old,simply because,regardless of age ,if you haven't got beauty from the start,you ain't gonna get it when you age .
Posted by: tabletalk at January 14, 2008 4:46 PM
That is a tad shallow tabletalk. None of us are perfect and I would rather have a partner whose BMI was 25/30 witha few wrinkles that I could really communicate with than some airhead who looked fabulous.
Posted by: jenjen57 at January 14, 2008 5:45 PM
In that case Rider...you owe me a drink :)
Posted by: wishfulthinker03 at January 14, 2008 5:21 PM
tabletalk: I don't have a problem with 'that', although not sure what you mean exactly, considering I was supporting your post.
Could you please elaborate on what you perceive as being the problem, and I will respond appropriately.
Posted by: femalepersuasion at January 14, 2008 5:21 PM
I spent most of my lunch hour today reading profiles and I have to say ... don't women in their 40s listen to modern music? I agree there were good songs in the 60s, 70s & 80s but what about the 90s & 00s? Doesn't anyone else listen to JJJ radio?
Posted by: woodnwine at January 14, 2008 5:01 PM
PS. And bang on topic:
1) If you're divorced, I don't want to see "single". Especially if you claim a few kids further down the page.
I wish RSVP would replace 'single' with "maritally inexperienced" (how's that for PC?), just to bring some potential accuracy into the most important item in everyone's profiles - their relative eligibility.
Personally, I don't want 'single' thank you, and I don't want 'never kids'.
I'm looking for my match, and my match has already had the emotional growth of learning how to cooperate/compromise with at least one husband/de facto for the long haul, and the self-discipline of having to become ten times more unselfish, to do the right thing by her children.
I've done my horse-breaking (non-sex-specific version of flighty-filly-breaking) last time around (as she did to me) and now I want someone who is used to twin-harness, and PREFERS it to standing in the paddock, wistfully watching the other horses who are already back on the road.
2) I have a slight personal preference for 'divorced' over 'widow'. As a divorcee myself, and on the dumpee side of the split, I empathise best with women who have also been left behind.
A chance to dust one another down, and know we are coming from the same place, or at least similar - I was never beaten up - only carefully ignored and then left behind.
On the other hand, widows' sainted snatched-from-them husbands can be a hard act to follow.
3) Age differences are in the news again. In other blogs I've made my own case for idealling someone who's calendar younger:
Same reason as why I chose my RSVP codename - the last
Blog now closed; thank you for your comments!
Posted by: rsvpproducttest at January 16, 2008 8:46 AM